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Stupid Doors

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Summary: Angel always feels the need to push open both doors when he walks into a room. Well, Spike, has had enough.

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
BtVS/AtS Non-Crossover > Comedy > Angel-CenteredEmeralEmberFR1315292111,62525 Mar 0825 Mar 08Yes
Title: Stupid Doors
Author: EmeralEmber
Status: One-shot
Rating: NC-13 (minor language)
Summary: Angel always feels the need to push open both doors when he walks into a room. Well, Spike, has had enough.
Disclaimer:Angel and all related characters are copyright Joss Whedon and ME. No infringement intended.
Author Note: I just watched the episode of Angel where Eve asks Angel if he always opens both door when he comes into a room and I just had to do this.



He was in a bad mood, but could anyone blame him? He had just gotten into a huge fight with too many demons to count. He had to negotiate treaties with groups of demons that didn’t want or need to get along. Angel, all in all, was tired and need to relax. In his office. Where Spike…along with…many…other…things…couldn’t bother him or ask him stupid questions. He was drained. He was going to get to watch the Hockey game that he had recorded the night before if it killed him, not that he wasn’t already dead.

As he began walking to his office, he saw Spike standing next to Harmony talking about something or another. Probably fun times of killing people. Or sex. Or both. “Uh…Angel?” he heard Harmony ask as he started walking passed her.

“What, Harmony?” He was clearly angry. It was oozing off him, as well as dripping. Only dripping though because he was covered in some foreign purple goo.

“I don’t think you should try to--”

“Not right now, Harm. I am covered in goo,” Angel stopped and turned to her and Spike, “I have to deal with three groups of demons that want to kill not only each other, but me, too. I am tired and want to watch my hockey game. And Spike, if you say anything…I will stake you.”

With that he turned back and started walking to his office again. He was going to get in there before anyone else could say anything. “But, Angel!” Harmony’s voice was heard from behind.

“Not now, Harmony!”

Good. He was at the door. Now all the was left was to push them open and he’d be home free. And that was what he did. He pushed the doors open. Both opened without any problem whatsoever. It was the pole that was in the middle of the doors that he didn’t see and slammed into that served as a problem.

Angel’s hand flew up to his forehead as he turned around to face an hysterical Spike and a slightly worried Harmony. “Which one of you did this?!”

Like he really had to ask. “Oh, Mr. High and Mighty can’t figure that one out, can he?” Spike said as his laughter died down. “Me, you incompetent ponce! That’s what you get for feelin’ the need to open two doors at a time!”

“Spike, I am really—”

“Not to worry. That Eve character helped me out a bit. Makin’ it so you couldn’ see the metal pole in your way.”

“I swear to God, Spike,” Angel said as he walked back towards his office. Once again pushing both doors open and slamming into the metal pole. Only this time, falling on his back and looking at a once again hysterical bleached and British vampire.

The End

You have reached the end of "Stupid Doors". This story is complete.

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