Author's note: I got this idea, and it wouldn't leave me alone, so I wrote enough to get it out of my head. As far as I know, no one has done a YAHF with this particular character, so I'm pretty sure I'm the first. Could be wrong though.
Disclaimer: I don't own Buffy or Naruto.
Xander walked into the costume shop, nearly giddy. For that reason alone, he was glad he hadn’t come with Willow and Buffy. There was no reason for them to see him like this. Since the shop was fairly empty, Xander wasn’t surprised to see the clerk making his way over. “Hello there, can I help you? You’ve arrived at a good time, most of my costumes are still in stock.”
Xander nodded. “Sure thing, Mr. Brit. I want that one.” Xander had been saving up for a long time to make sure this Halloween would be perfect, and with his costume, it would be.
“Of course, sir.”
Xander knocked on the door to the Summers’ home, and smiled widely when Joyce answered. “Hi there, Xander. Buffy and Willow are almost done, so they should be down shortly. But who are you supposed to be? With the robes, I’d say you were a priest, but the hat’s throwing me off.”
“Yeah, I’m not a priest. Actually, I’m-” Xander was interrupted by Buffy’s appearance at the top of the stairs, and promptly started complimenting her on her costume. Once Willow popped out wearing her ghost costume, the trio left, throwing quick good-byes to Buffy’s mom as they went.
Sarutobi blinked as his vision swam. Which was unusual, as Sarutobi had long since trained his senses to work at peak efficiency. However, Sarutobi was much more concerned with what he was seeing, primarily because he wasn’t supposed to be. The last thing he remembered was sealing away his ex-student’s arms after summoning the Shinigami. He remembered feeling the bitter, deathly cold grasp of the Shinigami, the way it froze his soul. The only thing he was supposed to know at this point was endless torture in the Death God’s stomach.
His mind was filled with suspicion, but his soul was overjoyed at being alive again. He caught sight of a redheaded girl running towards him and shouting in a language he didn’t understand, before he jumped off into the trees. Sarutobi Hiruzen, legendary ninja, Third Hokage of Konoha, The God of Shinobi, The Professor, fought again.
Xander snapped back into consciousness. He felt the same way he did after the Hyena incident the year before. Tired, and entirely aware of his previous actions, but like he had been removed from his body completely. He knew he had been possessed again.
But this time, he wasn’t sure his possessor had really left.
There was no voice in the back of his head, no itching consciousness telling him to go do something, but Xander knew he was no longer the same person he was at the start of the night.
He was still Xander, he was pretty sure, with his sixteen years of experience behind him; but now he remembered being Sarutobi Hiruzen, legendary ninja and Sandaime Hokage of Konohagakure no Sato, backed by almost seven decades of life.
Who was to say which one was right? He could still feel chakra reserves flowing under his skin, brimming with unreleased power. He could feel everything around him, a situational awareness trained into him by his teachers, the Shodai and the Nidaime. There was still a slight pull, indicating there was a summoned monkey somewhere around here. Something that should have gone away if he wasn’t Sarutobi.
But he still felt the need to try and joke this whole this away. Let others know he was fine, even if he wasn’t. There was still the need to find the guy who did this to him and beat his face in. There was still the focused hatred for vampires, the demons that took his best friend from him. And even more, there was still the need to protect his girls, even if Buffy could fight her way out of an entire nest of vampires with only her fists, and even if Willow would never need his help with a test or research. Just thinking about his girls set Xander’s mind in focus.
He could figure out who he was later. Right now, he had to make sure nothing had happened to his girls.
Xander pushed the doors to the library open violently. “Giles!” he shouted.
The librarian looked up in shock. “Xander, it’s good to see you’re okay.” Buffy was sitting at the table, an angry scowl marring her beautiful face. Across from her, Willow was scanning through a book, wearing something that most definitely wasn’t her usual ghost sheet. Jenny Calendar was sitting off in the corner, wearing an Arabian slave-girl outfit, and looking distinctly embarrassed. Giles was standing up at the corner of the table; book in hand and the other reaching for his glasses.
“I’m not sure how much you know of what happened tonight, but it has been resolved. A chaos mage named Ethan Rayne, the man the majority of the town bought their costumes from, had cursed his costumes. Once the spell was activated, people became the characters they dressed as. Ghosts became ghosts, and demons became demons.”
“And ninjas became ninjas,” Xander said, nodding. “I got that, I just don’t understand what happened afterwards.”
Everyone’s heads spun to look at Xander, confused expressions on their face. “Um, Xander, I’m not sure something hasn’t gone wrong,” Giles said slowly. “Perhaps you could repeat what you just said? In English, if possible? My Japanese is horrible.”
Xander growled. “Dammit,” he cursed in English. “That’s the third time so far. I keep dropping into Japanese without realizing it.”
“You know, Buffy will never forgive you if she finds out you did this, she’ll never forgive you,” Giles advised.
“Then I just won’t be found out. There’s a reason why Xander Harris is known as a laughingstock, but the Shadow of Sunnydale is feared by every demon that dares visit the Hellmouth. Besides, someone needs to get him for what he did to Kendra and Jenny.” Angelus, released after Angel slept with Buffy, had started a war against the Scooby Gang. Jenny had almost been killed, and would have been if not for Xander’s timely intervention. Even so, she had been permanently crippled from the waist down. After that attempt to mentally unbalance the Scoobies failed, Angelus kidnapped Kendra, the second Slayer. She was tortured for hours before Angelus finally drained her, leaving her mutilated corpse on the steps of the school.
“Yes, well, do be careful. I would never hear the end of it if you were to die.”
Xander smiled. “Yeah, I’d miss you too, G-man.”
Giles removed his glasses and cleaned them. “Must you call me that infernal nickname?” When he turned back around, Xander was already gone.
Angelus smiled sadistically as he waited for his next meal to get in range. The teenaged girl smelled delicious. Innocent and pure, he could tell from here.
The vampire shot his arm out of the alley, dragging the girl back and forcing her against the wall. She shrieked in fear as he revealed his demonic visage. He dipped his fangs into her throat, sucking greedily as her lifeblood flowed free.
Angelus felt something in his neck pinch, and the girl in front of him wavered and disappeared, the taste of blood in his mouth following. There was a soft chuckle behind him and a mocking voice said, “Nighty-night, Angelus.”
The next thing the vampire knew, he was immobile. He was chained to a cross, and he could feel his flesh sizzle as the holy symbol burned him slowly. “Who?” he asked dumbly.
The shadows shifted in front of him, and Angelus knew who had captured him. The Shadow of Sunnydale. No one knew his identity, or if it was human or demon. All that was known was that if the Shadow wanted you dead, you died, and that he worked with the Scooby Gang. Angel wasn’t allowed to know, so Angelus didn’t have any idea either.
“You know me, Angelus,” the voice said, echoing eerily around the empty graveyard. “You’ve pushed me too far, you know. I wanted to do this long ago, God knows you deserve it. You’ve killed so many people that you’ve earned your place in hell many times over. I’m doing the world a favor by getting rid of you.”
The shadows shifted again and the voice continued. “But if that were the case, I’d just kill you and be done with it. But you’ve killed people close to me. So I’m going to make sure everyone knows that that was a bad decision. You’re going to be my example.”
“So what? You’re going wait for this cross to burn me? I’ve been alive too long for that.”
“Oh, I don’t expect the cross to kill you. I expect it to hurt. The sun that’s rising in half an hour is what will kill you.”
Angelus sneered. “Crucify a vampire? Interesting, but hunters have done it many times over the ages. If you’re looking for something that makes an impact, this isn’t it.”
“Maybe not. But you’d be surprised at the images someone can come up with. Especially someone as twisted as you. Your screams of terror and pain will reach farther than any death could.” A set of hands emerged from the shadows and flipped through a set of seals. “Demonic Illusion: Hell Viewing Technique. Until the sun comes up, you’ll be subjected to the worst tortures you can image.”
Angelus felt death was a relief.
Faith grinned as she tore her way through the vampires she and Buffy were facing down. At least in a fight like this, she could ignore the feeling that she was being watched. She had had the feeling ever since arriving in the ‘Dale. Like someone was following her everywhere. It wasn’t a feeling she liked.
“Faith, get him,” Buffy shouted as she pushed the final baddie over against the wall next to her. Faith gripped her stake tightly, stabbing it downward.
Only to be jerked to the side as a knife embedded itself in her stake, pinning it to the wall. Faith’s eyes widened as she immediately realized the vampire she had been about to stake was still breathing. The shadows off to the side of her shifted and Xander Harris walked out, another knife already in his hand. “He’s human. But that bears the question of why he was in the middle of your fight.”
The scared man started talking immediately; spilling all the information he had on the Mayor and his Ascension. As the man talked, Faith inwardly thanked Xander. She couldn’t help but know he just stopped her from making a horrible decision.
Maggie Walsh turned the page in her book as she sipped her brandy. She had made another breakthrough with ADAM that morning, and was optimistic that she would have her greatest work operational within the week. She rubbed at her chest idly, ignoring the slight pain there.
The voice startled Maggie out of her book and she glanced around the room fearfully. “Who’s there?”
“You know, it took me a while to figure out what you were doing. You did an excellent job of keeping things quiet, but really, every operation has its holes. Even yours.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Creating Demon/Human hybrids isn’t something you can just keep quiet, you know. But it’s also something I can’t allow. I found your plans for ADAM. It’s a mistake.”
“ADAM is genius!” Maggie defended, fright creeping into her voice. No matter how much she looked, she couldn’t find the source of the voice.
“It’s an abomination. You’re just lucky I’m stopping you before you finished. A lot more people would have died if you had.”
“What are you talking about? Do you expect me to stop just because you don’t understand what I’m doing?”
“I don’t expect anything. I know that you wouldn’t stop. I’ve seen this type of thing before. I didn’t do the right thing then. I made the right choice this time.”
“What do you-hurk!” Her question was cut off by a violent coughing fit. When she could focus, she noticed her mouth tasted coppery, and her carpet was sporting a great deal of blood.
“Dr. Angleman’s already dead. So you don’t have to worry about anyone continuing your project. But if anyone does try, rest assured that they will follow you to hell.”
Just before her vision darkened for the final time, Maggie Walsh heard the voice again. “And if you were wondering, the poison wasn’t in the brandy. It was on the book. And the police will never find it.”
Enma, the monkey king, looked at the battle worn form of Xander Harris. “You know he would have been proud of you. The real Sarutobi, I mean. You learned the lessons his students never did.”
“It helps I’ve already got all his memories and knowledge.”
Enma shook his head. “Just because you know something doesn’t mean you’ve learned it. They never got that. You did.”
“At least I’m going down fighting.”
“Just like him. Peace may have been his way, but the old man thrived on the battlefield. I’m just sorry to see you go. You’ve been a better summoner than most.”
Xander shrugged. “It’s the Dead Kage Clause. Every leader must try their damnedest to have a more epic and meaningful death than their predecessor. I’m just unique in that I get two shots at it.”
“If it means anything to you, I think you beat his fight against Orochimaru.”
The rest of the Scooby gang watched in horror as Xander moved his hands through nine specific seals, becoming the only person to remember summoning the Death God twice.
Glory screamed as her soul was sealed away in a hell she could only imagine, held there by a god far more powerful than her.