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What Am I Going To Do Now?

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Summary: Buffy tells the Scoobies a secret about her family. How will that change their relationships?

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
CSI > CSI Las VegaszigpalFR181931,65826859,4066 May 0830 Oct 10Yes

Chapter One

Disclaimer: I own nothing, but Lily
Spoilers: Post BtVS S7 and end of CSI S3
AN1: The muse just ran with this one. I hope you like it.
AN2: Thanks C.
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Dawn's question keeps playing through my head. 'What are we going to do now?' The sad part is that is has come down to 'What am I going to do now?' Everyone else has something going on. Faith and Tara along with Anya and Xander are heading to Cleveland with Giles to set up another Slayer Central. Angel gave us the Hyperion when we first hit LA, and now, Willow has it running like a finely oiled machine while Dawn and Kennedy are sticking around to be the Head Slayer and Watcher here. Which brings it all back to me and not knowing what to do.

If that wasn't enough, the object of my affection is available too. The first time I was truly aware that I loved my best friend was when she came back from England, but then again, I have always felt deeply for Willow. I think my ever possible imminent death kept me from pursuing her. Plus, we each seem to have someone in our lives. I know I should probably take that chance, but I now have a new fear, ruining our friendship.

That's why I am sitting out on the balcony of my room, and then I notice my cell vibrating. Oh yeah, Will hacked into the Council systems and found out they were LOADED. Quentin is lucky that he was blown up, or I would have flown to England to kick his ass a new shade. Anyway, I pick up the phone and see a text from Will. 'Buffy, Meet me in my office. Willow :) ' I have also learned to love Willow more for her use of emoticons.

There wasn't much bustling around here today since the girls that are leaving want to say their goodbyes to the ones that are staying. Now the three couples are probably in their respective rooms using the down time to re-connect. Hey, as long as Kennedy doesn't hurt Dawn, Faith and I won't have to kick the crap out of her. I mean you only live once right, well unless you're me. I opened Will's office door, and she had an odd look on her face, but before I said anything, the door shut and locked, and then I felt Willow ward the room.

"Okay. If your text wasn't vague enough, now you magic us in your office. Should I be prepared to have my clothes ripped off because I have good underwear on," A girl can dream right. Besides, Willow and I have been heavily flirting with each other lately.

She didn't say anything right away as she came around her desk and led us over to the couch. Okay now I am starting to get flashbacks to when I first came to Sunnydale, but before I got a chance to inquire, she started, "I finally got started on Giles' idea of clearing everybody's Slayer-involved charges from their records, so after deleting yours from Hemery and Sunnydale, I noticed that you had an attachment to your personal file. It's an adoption record."

"I know. Well, I know I'm adopted. Other than that, I'm in the dark. Mom told me when she was sick. She also told me that my birth mother was seventeen when she had me, so I understood, but I also told Mom that she would always be my mother. Although now, I think I might want to meet her. I mean it's not like I'm like you guys and have stuff going on," Nice Buffy, make your best friend to feel unimportant.

Willow quickly wrapped me up in a hug, "Buffy, cut yourself a break. You have been fighting evil and stopping apocalypses for seven years, and now, you have a chance to walk away and live a relatively normal life without having to deal with all this, so feeling lost is understandable. Do you want me to see if I can get a name?" I just nodded in Willow's arms as I felt tears start to fall.

She kissed me on the temple before laying me down on the couch. I watched her go back around to her computer and start typing. I hope by the time I wise up, Willow will still be available. I just want to be settled before bringing her into the train wreck that is my love life. I saw that she was writing something down before typing a little more and then holding the piece of paper up, "Name?" getting a smiling nod, "Could you assemble the core Scoobies, they need to know."

---


Nicely done Catherine. Just to prove your suspicions, you blow a case against Sam Braun. The real kick in the head is that I did prove that he is my father. Splendid. Of all the family I could have found, it had to be him. I would have much rather found Elizabeth. Then again, nobody knows about her either. Well, that changes. After the year I have had, I am pushing in all my chips, so there will be no more surprises. The only thing good that happened this year is that Sara and I finally got together, and that was almost derailed by Eddie's death, but we worked through it just in time for me accidentally blowing up the lab and injuring her and Greg, not to mention the cases that was lost. That's why I called for this team meeting before we all go home.

I walked down the hall like a dead man walking. I know that I'm going to have to do this again later with Mom, Nancy, Lindsay, and Jeremy. I just hope that I have Sara beside me when I do it. I walked into the room and shut the door before placing my hands on top of the table.

"First off, I want to apologize for blowing the Sam Braun case, and before you hear it anywhere else, yes, he is my father," closing my eyes and taking a deep breath, "And in the season of clearing the air, there is something else I need to tell you. She may never come here, but I have another daughter. I gave her up for adoption when I was seventeen," finally opening my eyes to gauge everyone's reactions, especially Sara's.

The silence following my admission was painful, but thankfully, Warrick stepped up and hugged me, "Hey, what is one more to our already interesting family. Still love ya, Cat," as he kissed the top of my head. Nick and Greg followed with similar sentiments, so now that just leaves Gil and Sara.

Gil was next, "Catherine, the Sam Braun situation has been dealt with, so it is a moot point. And I already knew about your daughter. When I was promoted to supervisor, I saw the attachment to your personal file. If you want, I could have some people I know look around," shaking my head no to his offer. Yes, I would like to see her, but on her terms, not mine, "Okay, then I'll see you both in a couple days," and then there was one.

I was worried until Sara walked up and kissed me on the lips, "I didn't think Gil was ever going to leave. I am not upset with you, and I can't say I wouldn't do the same in your position. Do you want me to call Nancy so she can pick up Lindsay early, so we can get the family portion of this out of the way," returning Sara's kiss before giving her a hug.

"Thank you so much, baby. You are going to be my rock through this, and I promise lots of thank yous," interlocking our fingers as we walked back up the hallway.

I listened to Sara's half of the conversation, and I was glad that it wasn't going to be a hassle. I'm figuring Lindsay is going to be thrilled at the thought of a big sister. Jeremy probably won't care one way or the other, but Nancy might be hurt that I never told her. Mom is probably going to blow a gasket, even though this happened over twenty years ago.

Sara volunteered, and I let her drive home considering the heavy thoughts going through my head. She has been so good to Lindsay and I both, and I find myself wondering what we did without her. I always thought my childhood was rough, but the night Sara told me about hers, I cried for that little girl, but at the same time, I was proud of the woman she had become, and I know like my life, hers with pop up from time to time, and I will be there for her when it does. As Sara parked the car in the driveway, she reached over and squeezed my hand. I gave her a smile as we headed up to the house.

Lindsay slammed into both of our legs as I closed the door. Sara picked her up as we headed towards the kitchen. Nancy must have called since the extra place settings were out. Sara pointed me towards the stairs, and I knew right away what she was doing, so I gave Linds a kiss before heading up to take a cleansing shower. Boy, Sara was chocking up the points, and I am so looking forward to cashing them in.

After my quick but relaxing shower, I got dresses and headed straight to the kitchen where I found everyone already seated. Sara reached out and took my hand as I took a deep breath, "There is something I need to tell you."
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