Disclaimer: I own nothing except this screwed up idea, and I don’t even necessarily own that.
Okay people, here we go, another Halloween, Bleach inspired one. Hopefully awesome, R&R
Alexander “Xander” Harris sighed and thought, “Why was it always him?”
Noticing an odd looking katana he picked it up and inspected it. It seemed beyond basic, a yellowish metal handle, wrapped in some form of white fabric, the blade was dented badly and chipped as well, several large nicks missing from the blade, probably from slayer sparring.
Deciding the piece of junk may be useful for his cheap costume Xander grabbed it, and headed out of the library. He’d just say he asked Giles if the librarian asked him, nobody ever paid attention to him.
As Xander headed home he couldn’t help but remember how mad he’d been to find out a raccoon had somehow gotten into the attic, and had a family on the fatigues he’d been planning on wearing. Having stored the sword in his locker he headed to the costume shop with 'his girls' both being in talk about how to impress that damned vampire stalker Buffy seemed to have acquired.
Looking for something cool, Xander cursed as the shop keeper surprised him. Looking at the man he said, “I’d be careful of that if I were you, people around here are paranoid.”
The shop keeper Ethan Rayne had a smirk on his face that should have warned Xander something was up. Taking the boy in he could see the 'aura staining' of his old friend Rupert, as well as a lot of time recently spent around the slayer. Deciding he didn’t want the stupid short blonde to die ((Since that would mean Ripper came after him, and even he wasn’t that crazy. Even thought he was calling himself “Giles” now, he new ripper was still around, and he remembered how ripper has set the internal organs of some demons on fire ounce because they’d taken the last of his favorite brew, no Ethan most certainly did NOT want the girl dying.)) Ethan stated, “Hmm, my boy, were those females with you? Not a bad choice of costume though, nothing I myself would enjoy, I think I have the perfect costume for one such as you.”
Xander raised an eyebrow asking, “Oh really, and what would that be?” The chaos mage smirked, leading Xander into the back. Moving aside a few pieces of junk, he showed Xander a costume.
The costume was a white duster type coat, a black gi type top, black gi pants, as well as a pair of black fancy looking socks, and foot wrap sandals. The most important thing was doubtlessly the eye patch, put in a small zip lock bag, the eye patch looked basic.
Xander asked the costume merchant, “What’s so awesome about this?”
Ethan smirked as he replied, “This my boy, is a costume of a legendary figure, even more famous and powerful than the mythical slayer, a legend a lot of us British people know about, this is the Zaraki outfit.”.
Xander was surprised the man mentioned the slayer 'myth'. Looking at him Xander said, “What’s so special about him?”
Ethan smiled as he filled the young man in, “In times long forgotten, Zaraki was the title passed down from the strongest swordsmen to the strongest swordsmen, the only way to get it was by killing the previous one.”
Xander nodded as he said, “And what makes him more powerful than the slayer?”
Ethan again smirked, the boy was interested now to seal the deal, “well, the slayer supposedly kills vampires, human sized creatures, Zaraki supposedly slew demons as big as a house, killing them with one amazing blow.”
Xander smirked in a way that reminded Ethan of Ripper as he declared, “Okay, I’ll take it off your hands.”
Kenpachi Zaraki was a special being. You see, when someone dies, in a different universe their soul becomes a ghost like being. In that world, Soul Reapers exist; it’s their responsibility to send these souls to heaven, or hell. Unfortunately they sometimes can’t get to souls in time. If a soul exists too long, it becomes a hollow, an evil spirit driven only by the need to kill and 'eat' other spirits.
This is where the soul reapers truly appear, they kill the evil spirits, allowing the spirit deep within to finally get its deserved rest. If it was a bad person, the gates of hell form, and suck it down, if it’s good, it dissolves and travels to the spirit world.
Soul reapers were made non-existent when in the “Buffy” universe; the old ones were sealed on earth, this made hollows non-existent, thus no need.
However, in the Soul Reapers' universe, the title of Zaraki is still passed from insanely strong soldier to insanely strong solider. Now a theory to the universe is that everybody has a copy in every universe; sometimes it’s good, sometimes it’s bad, sometimes it’s neutral. Now the Zaraki of the Soul Reaper's universe would if not having been chosen as a captain, been reincarnated as a dark haired, brown eyed boy, thus, when the spell looked for a Zaraki, everyone’s favorite psychopath was called.
So instead of an ancient samurai, the 11th (Strongest, and most battle crazy) squad’s captain, Kenpachi Zaraki was called.
However, soul reapers strongest weapon is their soul slayer, or Zanpaktou, and they're basically a sword that represents one's soul. So Zaraki knew almost immediately something was up. Sitting down to meditate, (yes even he a battle crazy warrior could meditate, and yes, it wasn’t his style) but even Zaraki knew something bad may happen if he went on a crazy killing spree. Digging around in his head he quickly found Xander Harris’s life. Examining it, he knew what he had to do. Pulling out his sword, he stabbed himself in the stomach. He knew there may be hell to pay for this, but he really didn’t give a damn.
The next morning Xander Harris sighed as he rolled over. Realizing one of his eyes was not usable. He panicked, and grabbing for the eye he slowly realized it was because an eye patch was on it. He also realized as he ripped it off, maybe it was there for a reason, as raw energy exploded from him, blowing him into the ceiling. Reattaching the patch, he fell with a loud thud to the bed. When he fell he was VERY surprised to see four faces looking back at him, one white with black hair, one white with red hair, one white with pink hair, and the black with black hair.
Several hours later, Xander Kenpachi, sat down on a kitchen chair. He slowly, but determinedly drank from his cup of coffee. Looking at the women, he remembered some of the story from last night. It was simple enough, Joyce Summers, an odd mix of mother and crush, had at the last minute decided to pull on a white duster, over her own faith healer outfit, thus turning her into a healing squad captain. Zaraki didn’t know who she was, since she’d either long since retired, or been killed. Then there was Jenny Calendar, again, an odd cross between respected figure, and sex interest. He wasn’t sure how they’d ended up together. The medical woman had followed his energy, when the spell had ended both of them had been on an endorphins high, and things had happened. From the short katana Jenny now held, he assumed the same had happened with them.
Then there was by far the weirdest one, Harmony Kendall. She had dressed as Yachiru, Kenpatchi’s daughter in all but blood. Problem was Xander had tuned the insane man out after Jenny and Joyce, and since technically neither was the other it had been fine. Xander was just happy, even if Zaraki hunted him down; he’d lived out one of every high school student's fantasies.
Finally, Karol Smith, she was on the cheer leading team with Harmony. He’d have to guess she’d somehow ended up as Yoruichi, the flash (Shunpo) mistress. According to Harmony and her, she’d gone as a cat and being so close to Harmony probably made her the half cat woman.
Deciding to break the ice, he said simple, “So, how was I?”
Xander had expected the thump, and the kick, what he hadn’t’ expected was the French kiss, and the grope, and four seemingly unanimous replies of, “we'll have to try again so you can remember.”
Author’s note: Yosh, I think I’m off to a good start. Whether or not this will continue even I don’t know. I may write some hardcore kinky scenes between the five lovers, if I’m feeling like it later on. Also I kind of want to do a Zaraki Xander, versus Mayor Snake. Any comments, or anything, please review and tell me what you think. Flames will be used to power Katon jutsus, other than that, all comments, or reviews welcome. So until next time true believers, T out.
P.S. Kenpatchi used his raw energy to scare demons and such away, so no real fighting. Any who did he killed with his bare hands.