So this is the start of my first attempt at this FF stuff, well, publishing it and since I’ve been out of my teens that is. I decided that since it’s my escape from work, and this Summer seems to be a little slow and I read fast, that if I wanted to escape work I’d have to write it myself. : ) Buffy, Stargate, and anyone else you recognize belong to whoever owns them. If you recognize it I can tell you for sure that I don’t own it. The title is from a wonderful Melissa Etheridge song that so far has nothing to do with the story. We’ll see if that changes. LOL When I started working on this I had a pretty firm idea of when it was set in both series … and that’s kinda morphed and created it’s own reality. So, this is set after the Buffy series ends and I mention the Buffy comics briefly later on, but nothing that will confuse you if you haven’t read them, (although you really should read them, they’re wonderful!) So far I don’t mention anything recent for SG1. Daniel’s gone, Janet’s alive, but my timeline may get a little wonky cause until I started writing I thought it would be set later in the series. Go figure. I'm not going for spot on accuracy, if I wanted that I'd break out my dvds, cause nobody does it better, I'm just aiming for an entertaining story with the characters we know and love. I would love feedback and constructive input, please don’t bother with flames or timeline corrections unless I really messed something up. I have enough stress in my RL, this is just for fun and to try something different. I hope ya’ll enjoy reading this a fraction as much as I’ve enjoyed reading all the other wonderful stories on this site. Now, enough with the rambly, on with the story. Thanks for reading! : )
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‘Crack!’ Buffy was proud of her restraint, as the man’s head only snapped to the side from it’s contact with her palm. The way she was feeling, she had to remind herself twice that slayer strength plus mortal man did not make for a day at the mall, and that, you know, killing mortals wasn’t what she was there for.
“Buffy! What … ? How … ? Why … ?” He looked at her in shock as he cradled his jaw.
am I doing here? How
did I get here? Why
am I here? Hmm, let’s think about that. My boyfriend disappears with no word, I have to jump through ridiculously high hoops to even find out if he’s alive, I finally get here and am told he’s been MIA for six weeks and no one thought to mention it to me! You’ll excuse me if I’m a little ticked off!” Her voice rose with each word.
“Hey, it’s not like it’s never happened to you! What about the five months you were dead?” A murmur came from behind him as a voice asked someone else, “Did he say dead?”
“Nuh-uh. That’s the whole reason we made the deal. The reason I had to tell Willow all about us, so that if Buffy went all portally again, Wills’d give you the 411 and let you know I’d be late for dinner! YOU were supposed to do the same!”
He squirmed, noticing the stares of the growing crowd around him. “I did! It’s not my fault that Danny had trouble reaching you. He is non-corporeal now you know. Not to mention the fact he was busy keeping me company in between torture sessions.” He put emphasis on the word torture, hoping to distract her long enough to find some privacy.
“Oh, now you’re going to pull out the torture excuse?” No such luck. “Do you want to know how I got here? I had to call Riley! Talk about torture!”
“You called Finn?” The words popped out of his mouth before he could stop himself and he was dismayed to hear the petulance in his own voice. He couldn’t help it, he didn’t like the little twerp and the farther he stayed away from his
girlfriend the better. It didn’t help that Finn had been the reason it had taken Buffy so long to trust him. When they met she’d had a bumper sticker that read: ‘Oxymoron #47: Military Intelligence’.
“Oh, at ease, fly boy. I only called him to get clearance so I didn’t have to break into this place.”
The throat clearing behind him had been gentle enough to ignore, but at this statement, what had obviously been the beginnings of another attempt was broken by a fit of coughing.
He glared at the small blonde in front of him. “Now you’ve done it.”
Seeing that their boss was still coughing, Major Samantha Carter decided this was too fascinating of a conversation not to join in. “Uh .. Sir?”
He rubbed a hand over his face and mentally pushed back thoughts of a hot shower, cold beer and a little TLC from his girlfriend, not necessarily in that order.
“Samantha Carter, Buffy Summers.”
Instantly the scowl was replaced with a smile as Buffy reached forward to shake Sam’s hand, using the ‘company manners’ her Mother had instilled in her and that still made an appearance when she felt like it. “Nice to meet you, I’ve heard so much about you.”
“Only good things, I hope.” Joked Sam, a bit wary of the swift change of mood.
“Oh, you know, mostly.” She glared evilly over her shoulder, a reminder that the argument wasn’t over yet.
” Now Sam was glaring at him too.
“Buffy!” Just what he needed, two blondes who could kick his ass pissed at him.
“Col. O’Neill!” The General had obviously finished his coughing jag.
Jack reluctantly turned to face his boss. “Yes, sir?”
“My office! Both of you! Now!”
He sighed. “Yes, sir.”
The group of observers, which had grown to include Teal’c, Walter, Siler, two nurses who were probably spying for Dr. Frasier, a lab tech, a member of SG-4 and all of SG-13, who were apparently on their way to the gate room for a mission and stopped for a show along the way, watched silently as the General stormed to his office.
“You are, as I believe they say, ‘in for it now,’ O’Neill.”
“Thanks for the support, T.” Jack rolled his eyes, then gestured Buffy ahead of him as they started down the hallway. “Right this way, ma’am, my executioner is waiting.”
“He’ll have to stand in line then, if you hadn’t noticed, I’m still mad at you.”
“Oh, I would’ve had to be dead and staked to dust to have not
noticed.” Their voices trailed away as they reached the end of the corridor and turned the corner. Those still standing in the hallway immediately turned to each other with overlapping shock, awe, amusement, amazement and not a little laughter. It was pretty much universally agreed that if they hadn’t seen it with their own eyes, they never would have believed the sight of the 5’2” blonde going toe to toe with the foot taller, twenty year older Colonel. The crowd quickly dispersed, each witness eager to be the first to share the story of Jack’s ‘friend’. Sam looked at Teal’c and rolled her eyes, then set off to find Janet. She’d be dammed if she was going to let one of the nurses beat her to telling her best friend the juiciest piece of gossip since Siler was discovered changing fuses in the basement while singing along to a Paula Abdul song on his iPod. He tried to float the story that he was just doing research to see if ‘cold hearted snake’ referred to the Goa’uld. Everyone agreed that it was extremely quick thinking and the story might even have been able to fly, considering the things people were forced to accept in Cheyenne Mountain every day. It would have helped if he hadn’t been dancing while he sang into his oversized wrench. It also would have helped if he was wearing more than just his underwear at the time.
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Siler stood quietly in the elevator as it descended several levels. He was thankful Col. O’Neill had been rescued and immediately done something to take the spotlight again; he was happy to give it up. Plus, if people were busy gossiping, he’d be free to listen to the new single he’d downloaded off the American Idol site. Siler shifted uncomfortably. If only he could dance better in coveralls!