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Kakashi's Lament

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This story is No. 2 in the series "Konoha Mysteries". You may wish to read the series introduction and the preceeding stories first.

Summary: Kakashi will regret having the most unpredictable person in Konoha on his team. Poor him.

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
Anime > NarutochrishillFR151317,618126167,16514 Sep 0831 May 10No

Time to prepare

In many way, Konoha was a microcosm of the bigger picture of the Elemental Nations, if not the world.

You had the ordinary people who didn't really think too much of the situations around them, preferring to go day by day and making a living out of whatever skills they had. They didn't put too much effort into doing things, but they didn't put in too little either. Just the ordinary person you would find anywhere who would defer to authority while complaining about what that authority was doing.

You had the dedicated people, who put themselves into a position of being the best at whatever they did. It did not matter if it was only one endeavour, they poured their heart and soul into it, allowing some advancements, while many more were collaborative efforts. These were the innovators who's names may or may not be known, but, for a time at least, their efforts led to a better, or worse, future.

You had those who were power hungry. Some for physical battles, some for political power, while most were for money. They thought that everything revolved around what they wanted, rather than around what was best for the group. These greedy people were the ones that instigated incidents to either push things their way, or to tear down those who could prove themselves better.

You had the peaceful ones. The ones dreaming of a better future where things like wars didn't happen. They were the dreamers and adventurers who wanted to see the world, and bring knowledge to the masses. Unfortunately, most of these people had trouble seeing anything beyond five or six hundred metres, and would prefer to do their exploring by books. These people got their jollies by creating complex rituals, such as the tea ceremony, in order to impose order upon a chaotic universe.

You had the leaders, who encompassed all of that, but who were looking out for others as well. You couldn't lead if you didn't have somebody to lead, so they ended up teachers, bureaucrats, and using others for the most gain, somethings for the community, sometimes for themselves. They were the backbone of the society.

Then you had those who would give their all, including their lives in order to protect what they considered important, be it a place, an idea, or a person. These were the ones who would cross all lines of society, and more often than not compromised everything but their beliefs to carry out what they considered the most important thing in the world.

If you were to place Kakashi somewhere in this mess of definitions, you would get different answers.

He would place himself as a person who would give his life for another.

Most of Konoha's ninja force would put him as a lazy bastard that just did the bare minimum.

Some would put him as a leader of men.

Those that knew of the Sharingan, would consider him an innovator as well as one of the best.

Sasuke considered him an annoyance who wouldn't share his power.

Women considered him a pervert who shouldn't be near children.

But most of all, Anko considered him her first target.

---

“You sure these will work?” Anko asked as she looked over the new loads that she had developed with Naruto.

“They should. I would never have thought of doing it that way, and the design of this dart is so new that I wonder if it would get a longer distance,” Naruto replied as he finished the last seal.

The dart that they were looking at duplicated an arrow that Anko had found in a book. Instead of the usual fletching, this one would cause it to spin, giving a longer distance. If it worked with the dart, the range would change from a mere 100 metres to somewhere around 800. In addition to this, it had a wind seal at the bottom, which would further propel the dart once it left the launching chamber. Something that Naruto hadn't even considered.

“The real question is if the load will come out once it hits it target,” Naruto muttered, wondering if the new seal would work.

“Well, I have a load of the new types, its time to test them,” Anko smiled to a boy who had fast become a friend. She picked up the final dart, sealed it with the others into the loader, and attached it to her left armlet. The other darts to test were loaded into the right one.

“Well have fun, I guess. Just tell me if they work, and then tell me what you loaded into them.” Naruto shrugged as he went back to his drawing board.

Anko was already out the door as her reply came, “You'll find out very soon.”

---

Sasuke smiled.

Currently, he was looking at all the equipment that he managed to gather from all over the compound, along with the various pieces of equipment that he bought from very grateful merchants. Steel, fuel, various electronic components, televisions, computers with monitors, and numerous chemicals with all the appropriate chemical paraphernalia. It had taken almost a month, but he had everything complete and moved into place. Now he could begin making weapons better than Narutos!

He turned on the computers, and waited. Computers, from what he had seen and understood, were simple things. You talked to them, they talked to you, you told them what to do, they did what you wanted. “Computer, I want information on creating weapons.”

Unfortunately for Sasuke, the equation he was depending on, which was computers did everything you asked them to do, was the realm of science fiction. He didn't know this, or realize what computers could really do, or what they actually were. As a Shinobi, he didn't require the machines for information, to work his body, or even to get jutsu. Most of the Ninja world still depended on scrolls as it was tradition.

So Sasuke stood waiting for the computers to respond to his query. He was standing there for more than five minutes before he realized they weren't working right, since they were not giving him the information that he wanted. He snorted and turned away to the chemicals. Starting with that should be easy enough to do.

A simple bomb. He would start with that, and he had a book that one of the clerics was happy to give him, although apparently he wasn't supposed to know it existed. It apparently had all sorts of recipes for what he wanted to do. It had something here called thermite, and showed how to make it a solid to take with him on missions. He had all the components, now to mix it up.

---

It took an hour for her target to show up. She knew the new release of that book would lure him into the open. Remembering the lessons, she pointed her arms, waited, and then released the darts, one after the other.

Kakashi, who was distracted by the new book almost missed it, and did manage to get partially away, but the first dart still hit him, and he suddenly felt heavy, sticky, and couldn't see as his eyes were now closed and sealed shut. He heard, rather than felt the second object hit and nothing happened from his prospective. Except for laughter. A high pitched laugh he recognized as Anko.

Anko looked at the hair defying pervert and gasped out. “Experiment successful. I'm going to love using these!”

---

There had been something bothering Naruto for the month since Sasuke had stolen the defective armbands, and today was the day when it occured to him. The damn things were vulnerable to be stolen, not just by Leaf ninja, but by enemies. Or there were several solutions that he could come up with, but nothing that would work long term. Yes, he could work a blood seal, but that would not last long to someone determine to reverse engineer everything. Nor would a seal to recognize a particular chakra signature, as his own experiments had shown that it was possible to duplicate those. No, what he needed was a new way of doing things, and the only way that was possible was to get the old pervert back here.

Naruto shuddered. Every time ero-senin came back, he created problems for him. Unfortunately, the man was the only person cleared for what he was doing. Getting him to stay out of the hotsprings and concentrating on work was going to be hell.

---

'Tarred. And feathered.'

Kakashi was making his way to ANBU headquarters with these thoughts.

'Tarred. And Feathered.'

He had a feeling it was due to Naruto, but there was only one person who would do it in this manner, since this wasn't part of a huge prank.

Walking in the door, he greeted the person at the front, “Where's Anko?”

The masked person hesitated for a second, “She's supposed to be at the tower today. Can I ask?”

“No. You may not. I will be in the dock area. No one is to come by. IS. THAT. UNDERSTOOD!”

“Yes sir. No one is to disturb you while you are in the dock area. There's just one thing.”

“NOT. A. WORD!” Kakashi shouted as the poor sod who was now a poor substitute for Anko.

The man gulped, and sat back down. It was five minutes later when he heard the screem. “I tried to tell him we were out of kerosine, but was he willing to listen? No, He's a former ANBU Captain and knows better than those on desk duty.”

---

Sasuke eyed the finished product.

The powdered thermite worked as advertised. It burned hot, and it could melt through metal.

This solid version should work as well, but it still needed to be tested. He wasn't fool enough to test it himself after the last disaster. He needed a fool, a patsy, someone who would use the stuff without thinking. Someone who would do things just because he said so.

That left the Dobe out.

But there was Sakura. Then again, she was scary at the moment. More likely to kill you to save you, or just to get some attention. She was out.

Kakashi seemed to want to cry every time he looked at the squad members. Given the mans experience with the Dobe's stuff, he was out.

But there was a resource outside of his team. A resource that would finally be useful. And the best part was if they died, it would be no loss.

Finally, Sasuke had a use for fangirls!

The End?

You have reached the end of "Kakashi's Lament" – so far. This story is incomplete and the last chapter was posted on 31 May 10.

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