Chapter Seven, part two

Author's Note: Thank you so much everyone that reviewed! Here's the other part of the chapter as promised. A bit later than I thought, but I was hit with a complete block with my objectivity with the chapter and accidentally screwed it up almost beyond rescue. >.< Hopefully, I managed to save enough of it.

Anyway, here it goes~

Chapter Seven, part two

Neither of them spoke on their way to where they were going, Elias' eyes facing straight forward and Buffy's fixed on the constantly moving outsides. The colorful lights of the city flashed by in bright patterns and there was no hint of light that wasn't artificial. Today never seemed to end, and in a way, that suited her completely. She didn't want to sleep, not with what had happened. Soon enough it would be day again and the human light would take over from the preternatural night. Then, she could let the slayer inside her rest, but right now she needed to be out, moving and figuring out what to do.

Their destination was a mansion, straight up and down in a no fuss style with immaculate lawns and the occasional dark shape of greenery strewn across them. Cars dotted the road outside the driveway, but Elias drove straight through the gates, parking in front of the main doors lit by Gothic lampposts that seemed almost ludicrous next to the house.

"Your home?" Buffy asked as he lead her past the main entrance and around the corner to a smaller entrance.

Elias glanced back at her, eyes glinting in the lights of the windows. "Yes," he said shortly.

The door was opened by a younger man that scurried away as soon as he came and he turned out to be the last person Buffy saw as Elias brought her to a sitting room on the second floor. There were plenty of people in the house though - she could hear them, sense them in some cases. She guessed they either stayed away out of preference or from orders - with no experience with the inner workings of a...flock, she couldn't guess which.

The sitting room was decorated sparsely but comfortably with a fire going in the open fireplace and three cups of something resting on the table separating two vintage couches. One of them was empty, but in the other sat Rafael, arms crossed and spectacular in corduroys and a tight-fitting knitted shirt.

"Slayer Summers," he greeted her as she entered, inclining his head. Buffy nodded back and went to the empty couch while Elias seated himself next to Rafael. "It's a late hour for visits."

"I figured you would be up," she replied, looking between them. "Maybe not doing what you were though."

Elias coughed. "I asked Anna to make some tea," he said, gesturing towards the china set out on the table.

Letting the subject go, Buffy reached for her cup and sipped lightly at it. The tea was still hot and tasted lightly of mint and cherry. Not quite what she'd gotten used to in Scotland, but rather tasty for that. Putting it down again, she looked at them.

"We need to talk," she said. Elias stilled, only briefly, and yet it pinged her senses somehow. There was something about how he looked, something...

Buffy set down the cup with a sharp click. "You're hiding something from me."

"Hiding is an ugly word," Elias temporized. Buffy gave him a look. Elias glanced at Raphael, but from the way Raphael looked back... Well, if he agreed with whatever Elias was trying to say with that glance, Buffy'd walk up to Nikolaos and offer her neck. Elias sighed and somehow, Buffy knew she'd get the truth this time. There was something about Elias - he didn't lie easily, not with everything transparent on his face.

"Yes," he said. "I've been hiding something. A misstep on my part."

Stomping on the irrational hurt at his words, Buffy stared impatiently. "So?" she prompted.

"So," Elias echoed, and his voice seemed to delve back in time, his eyes going distant until she doubted that he was aware of even Raphael. "The Powers That Be."

Something in Buffy clicked into place and she knew. Retirement her ass. This might have been about balance, this might have been about letting the world settle back as it was supposed to be, but at the same time... This was the Powers. They didn't let their resources go.

"I was one of their Messengers," Elias continued. Buffy knotted her fingers in her lap, fought the urge to get up and get out. "Now I'm yours."

Angel had told her about Cordelia, about Doyle. About their function in his team. She'd never thought she'd get her own.

"They're putting me back on duty," Buffy stated before her mind caught up. "But why a Messenger?" She looked suspiciously at him. "I've never had one before."

"To help you," Elias said quietly, looking at her. His eyes were blank, lacking the warmth they usually had. This was the Messenger, not the King of Crows. "Or to keep an eye on you. Take your pick. But I'm not going to take without giving. They knew that and still they sent me."

It was so like them. But still, sent? Her hackles rose. "And what a gift," she said and the words bubbled up - she couldn't stop them, didn't want too. The Powers had taken her, taken what she was meant to do and they'd dropped her here. Leaving her without friends, without family, without anything. Only now they hadn't - but what use was that now?. "What use are you supposed to be? Therapist? Because, you know, I really can't see what use I have of a Messenger. One shacked up with a local were-king at that."

Elias' face closed off. Buffy's stomach dropped and she bit off the words that wanted to continue pouring out. She knew what the Powers demanded, and she knew what she'd implied was unforgivable. Raphael looked at her sharply and Buffy looked away.

"I'm sorry," she offered, then shut her mouth. This wasn't who she wanted to be, this wasn't who she was.

"You can't go back." Elias' voice was frozen solid, the look in his eyes hard. "The portal between the worlds are closed to you."

"I know," Buffy said and struggled to keep the anger out of her voice. "I've tried. But this isn't home."

"This is home," Elias said and leaned forwards, his hands spread. "But you're not willing to accept that. You're not even willing to try. No matter the fact Phillip owes his life to you, no matter that the survival of this city is in your hands. No matter that you're making a difference. The Powers might not have put you here to make you happy, but you're not even trying."

Buffy's head rebelled against that and the words tried the beat themselves out of her mouth again, but she couldn't. She'd said enough, had hurt them enough. Elias softened slightly. "You're not the only one that's been taken away," he said, but there was still edges in his voice and Buffy knew she'd put them there. "I understand that you want to go back, but you can't. And I'm sorry for that, but there's nothing I can do."

"Doesn't make it easier," slipped out before Buffy could stop it, but Elias didn't seem to mind, just nodded.

"I know," he said and slumped back heavily against the back of the couch and the arm Raphael rested along it. "Still there's nothing I can do about it, there's nothing you can do about it." He wanted to get it all over with as much as she did, it was plain as day. As was the knowledge that these things were never over. "You need to accept reality."

"Your reality." Buffy's voice was flat, the fight suddenly gone out of her. What was there to fight?

"Our reality." Elias sat up again and for a second, she thought she saw something hesitating in his eyes. "Help us fix this and I'll talk to the Powers. You won't be able to go home, but maybe I can convince them to let you say goodbye."

But will you try? The words sank between them like a stone in water.

The Powers didn't compromise, they didn't do take backs. Buffy knew that. Elias was offering to try as long s she did. A smile twisted itself onto her lips. All her life had been a compromise - what was one more?

"I'll try," she finally said, killing the uprising in her head with the words. "I'll try. And I'm sorry."

Elias smiled faintly. "You're upset," he said.

"Still." Things weren't right, things weren't like they had been between them and it was her fault. There was still something he was hiding too, but right now she didn't have the right to ask. Picking up her cold tea, Buffy sipped at it, trying to figure out what to say.

Raphael became the one to break the silence, nodding towards her hands and arms. "How are your injuries?"

Buffy looked down, surprised. She'd almost forgotten about it. Picking at a scab with a nail, she frowned at them. "Scabbed over," she said. "They'll be fine tomorrow; I heal fast."

"Hmm," Raphael said with an odd look in his eyes. "I don't think I've met a slayer that heals like you do. If what Elias tells me is true, you're not ordinary though."

"Just a bit different." Buffy pulled her sleeves down over the scabs, then looked at Elias as she remembered something. "You said they sent you," she said without thinking.

Elias went still again, then he visibly took a breath. Raphael said something under his breath Buffy didn't catch, repeating it until Elias relaxed. She'd hit a sore spot. "Six months ago, my flock and I lived in Sweden," he said and his voice was flatter than she'd ever heard it before. "I was a Messenger, not important but needed. Then I get a vision, telling me to uproot my Flock, move across the world and settle in St. Louis on a whole other damn continent to help you. To help you."

Buffy's stomach heaved and she had to slap a hand over her mouth. Raphael looked like he was torn between Elias and guiding her to a bathroom - she waved him off. "I'm fine," she gasped, trying to force it down. This wasn't about her. It wasn't. "Just... A minute."

There weren't words for how much she'd fucked this up. Swallowing, she glared at the ground. Elias hadn't been forthcoming, but neither had she. The Powers weren't the only ones making this worse.

"Thank you for telling me," she finally said and looked up. Raphael had his hand clamped hard over Elias' neck and Elias looked marginally more collected. "I should go."

They wouldn't get anything said today. Elias wasn't in the state of mind - she wasn't. Sometimes she forgot that she wasn't the only one fate had fucked over, and sometimes she created a mess that wasn't easy to fix. Buffy dared meet Elias' eyes, but they were still as blank as she suspected her own was.

"Might be a good idea," Raphael said, getting to his feet and stepping between them. Buffy followed him as he guided her towards the door. "You can call here whenever you have the time. " He handed her a card she pocketed as they reached the door, waiting for a car to be brought. Catching her eyes, Raphael nodded at her. "You're always welcome here or at the shop."

Buffy nodded. "Thank you."

The sun was just slipping above the horizon as she stepped outside, painting the sky a soft pink and yellow. A new beginning if she could make it one. She hoped so.

TBC

Still open to vicious poking if I don't update soon enough. :) And as a treat, a mini!preview of what will come (unedited unfortunately):

"Phillip," Buffy started, but trailed off as the words refused to come. With a frustrated shake of her head, Buffy went over to sit beside him. Phillip seemed to catch on to her hesitance, putting down the cup and hesitantly putting his arm around her. Without thinking about it, Buffy melted into him, resting her head on his shoulder. In a world where everything was unfamiliar, Phillip alone was familiar. It was hard to resist.

"I want to stay," Phillip said and Buffy felt him tense up as if waiting for her anger. "Maybe I can't fight, but I can help."