(This chapter in particular will be somewhat similar to the begining of The Body. I rewatched the episode again and I now have the urge to update)
"Xander!" Anya flew to his body and shook him.
"Damn it, Xander, wake up!" Tears cascaded down her cheeks. "Wake up!" She put her hand to her mouth.
"Oh my God." Quickly she picked up the phone and stared at it.
"What do I do?" She whispered. She tried to rack her brain on who to call. The only number, other than Xander's, that she knew was Giles's. With trembling fingers she pushed the numbers.
"Hello?" Giles's voice was on the other line.
"G...G...Giles?" She stammered. There was a pause before answering.
"Anya? What's wrong?"
Her voice trembled as she spoke.
"What about him?"
"He's...he's not breathing Giles."
"Not breathing?" Panick filled the man's voice.
"No," she said, her body trembling. "I don't know what to do. He's...he's so cold."
"The body's cold?" Giles sounded sick now.
"No, Xander is! And the eyes are so open. Why are his eyes open? What should I do? I know there's a number to call, I just don't know what number it is..."
"All right, Anya, this is important. I want you to hang up and dial 911. That's the police. The dispatcher will walk you through the neccessary procedures. I'm on my way." Giles forced his voice to remain calm as he thought about the idea of the boy being dead.
Anya nodded, feeling more and more like a scared little girl than an adult. Quickly she hung up and dialed 911.
"Hello, 911, how may I help you?" A calm voice of a woman answered her.
"Um...my boyfriend," she stammered. "He's not...he's not breathing. He's just lying there...he's not breathing..."
There was a pause.
"Okay, your boyfriend's not breathing?"
"Yes, I just said that!" She snapped. "Oh God, I'm so sorry," she added miserably.
"It's all right," the dispatcher said calmly. "Do you know CPR?"
"What's CPR?" Anya sounded frantic. "Is that a code? A human code for something? I've only been a human for a year now! And when I was they didn't have CPR. I don't know all the right codes to being human, okay?"
A longer pause.
"All right," the woman said oddly, trying not to sound confused. "Here's what you do. You put his head back and breathe into his mouth. Then you push on his chest several times. And than you breathe in his mouth again."
"And his mouth has...has to be open, right?" Anya asked.
"Yes," the voice said calmly. Anya placed the phone down.
"I can do this," she whispered. "I won't let Xander die! I can't..." She put her mouth over Xander's cold lips, transfering her air into his now airless body. Then she pushed on his chest over and over. Finally after five minutes she picked up the phone. "It's not working!" She shrieked. "It's not working, why isn't it working?"
"Ma'am, if you just calm down..."
"My boyfriend might be dead and you want me to calm down?" She shouted.
"Ma'am," the dispatcher said. "The paramedics are on their way. I suggest you wait until they get there if CPR isn't working."
"Wait, and do what?" Anya demanded.
"Just wait," the woman said. "Can you do that?" Anya nodded and hung up the phone. She helpd Xander's hand tightly.
"No," she said, her voice shaking. "Please don't die..." Her voice trailed off. In sudden rage she flung herself across the room, tearing at everything in sight. Than she collapsed helplessly on the rug next to his bed. Her mind flashed to the last time they made love. Would that really be the...last?
Tears flowed from her eyes. God, it was times like this she hated being human. She hated feeling so...mortal. Suddenly the door was pushed open as the paramedics walked in. They greated her quickly before dealing with Xander's body. She stared hopefully as they tried to bring him back. While they did they asked questions about medical problems and she told them of the tumor. Than they resumed their effors to bring him back from a place she couldn't go with him. But finally, after a few long moments, one of the stood up.
"Call it," he said softly to the other one and he looked at Anya. "I'm sorry, miss, but I have to tell you that..."
"No." She backed away. "No." She shook her head now.
"I'm sorry," he repeated, true remorse in his eyes. "But your boyfriend is..."
"NO!" She screamed. He jumped at that but continued, trying to collect himself.
"Is dead," he finally finished, tears in his own eyes. "You mentioned a tumor, so it's most likely that it was an anuerism. He probably felt little to no pain at all..."
"No," she sobbed. "No. Please, not Xander."
"I am truly sorry," he said softly and glanced around the room. "Or he could have been attacked," he murmured, noticing the mess. She looked around too.
"Oh, no. That was me," she said quickly. Eyes were arched. "I didn't kill him!" She said sharply. "I just couldn't controll my feelings..."
"I understand perfectly," he said. "Look, we have to go. We'll call in the coreners. They should be here shortly."
She nodded numbly. As they started to leave she asked them to stop.
"I don't....I don't know what to do," she said, her voice sounding hollow and helpless. "I don't know how to exsist without him..."
The two looked at each other.
"I guess you'll have to take one day at a time. Keep breathing, keep feeling," the main paramedic said softly. "I really don't know what else to say, miss. But I'm truly sorry."
They left, leaving her alone with the body.
"I don't know how to breathe," she whispered as she turned to Xander. "Without....without you. Or to feel..." tears continued to flow, becoming a small river down her shirt. The door opened.
"Oh my God," Giles murmured as he rushed to the boy.
"No!" She shouted. "Don't touch him. Leave him...the corneners...they're coming...coming to take him away."
"So he's..." Giles's voice trailed off.
"Dead," she whispered. Giles was somewhat surprised to find tears in his own eyes as he stared at the cold body of Alexander Harris.
"I'm so sorry Anya," he whispered. "So sorry." He went over to hug her.
"I don't know what to do now," she sobbed onto his jacket. "Without him. How to exsist. Giles, tell me what to do."
"I guess we wait for them to come and take the body...and than tell the others. Tell Buffy and Willow."
"Yes, tell the others."
'But how,' Giles thought. 'Do you go about telling someone that you cared about that one of their best friends is dead, and never coming back?'