upert Giles, International Watcher of Mystery
Disclaimers: Austin stuff is Mike's, Buffy stuff is Joss'.
Note: This is going to be one shagadelic fic, so if you hate Austin Powers, don't read, but if you like- OH behave!
"C'mon, Giles, please? I don't want to go alone!", Buffy whined. "Willow and Xander already saw it and I am leaving to go to LA tomorrow! I need to see it before I go spend quality time with my dad."
"Buffy- I think this movie sounds deplorable, really."
"Giles! It's about a British spy from the 60's frozen and thawed out in the 90's- you're British and you lived in the 60's, and you definitely are in need of thawing. What's not to like? Plus, I saved the world- you owe me!"
"Oh fine, if it will get you to stop whining. But I'll have you know I was only a boy in the 60's!"
"Fine- but believe me, I think you and he have a lot more in common than you think."
Buffy and Giles stood at his doorstep arguing. "Okay, okay, so you didn't get it. I'm sorry I dragged you, okay?"
"Maybe this will teach you not to try to get me interested in everything you children like."
"Fine, fine. Thanks for coming with me, anyway. I liked it." On impulse, she reached out and hugged him. "I'll see you in the fall and I promise to call you for updates on hellmouthy activity, okay? I'm going to take one more sweep before I head home."
"Alright. Good bye Buffy- have a good time." She walked down the street and waved goodbye as she got to the corner. He waved back and went inside, getting ready for bed and crawling under the covers. Would she never learn that he was never going to understand her and her friend's humor? He shook his head and drifted off to sleep…
The music began to blare loudly. He stopped walking, looking at his surroundings. He was on Sunnydale's main street but it was different. It looked like an exact replica of Carnaby Street. Just then he noticed the people surrounding him- they were dressed quite strangely- wearing mini-skirts and bellbottoms that mixed prints and stripes- quite grotesque actually. Then he looked down at his own attire. Oh, he wore tweed alright, but a complete tweed suit, which was blue with wide stripes, and underneath he wore a red polka-dotted shirt. Oh my- really what was he thinking? Suddenly as if from nowhere someone screamed "It's Rupert Giles!!!!" and a mob of people began to run at him. Knowing when to take a hint, he sprinted down the street trying to escape the mob. He wasn't sure what he did, but they most definitely after him.
Imagine his surprise when a police officer stopped him and began to dance- followed by a group of young girls. They were dancing around him, as if they expected him to join in. He turned and fled, not knowing what to do. Of course he then ran into the mob again, who continued to chase him until he saw his opportunity to escape. He sat down quickly on an open park bench, opening a magazine in front of his face. They passed right by. He exhaled loudly in relief, but his expression changed suddenly to horror as he looked down and realized it was his face on the cover of the magazine, with a caption that read "Rupert Giles, International Watcher of Mystery." Oh my!
He was so confused. The mob had turned back around and noticed him. He was about to dash off again when he heard the horn of his Citroen. He turned to see the car, decorated with the Union Jack, and Willow at the wheel.
"C'mon Giles!", she shouted.
Not bothering to ask questions (he still had a mob chasing him after all!) he opened the passenger door and got in. "Hello…Willow?" he choked out as he looked over at the usually reserved teen, who was in fact wearing a skin tight black cat suit.
"Now, now, Rupert, you know it's Mrs. Calendar."
"What? Willow isn't your last name Rosenberg?"
"It was until I met a nice handsome Rom and married him. And he wouldn't approve of your calling me Willow anymore, even though I am your Slayer."
"You? The Slayer? What about Buffy?"
"Who's Buffy? I have been the slayer for a while and I don't remember ever hearing about a Buffy."
"But… I …oh nevermind." He was too confused to say anything else. Just then he heard a strange beeping noise, and when Willow reached over and pressed a button near the ashtray and a small screen popped up, he gasped. "Where did that come from?"
"What is wrong with you Giles? You've always had that." Shaking her head she looked at the screen as did the confused Watcher.
And up popped a picture of Wesley, only with longer hair and no glasses. "Hello Rupert. This is Wesley Wyndam Pryce with the Watcher's Council. Just calling to let you know that Master Evil is setting a trap for you tonight at The Electric Psychadelic Slayer's Club, aka The Bronze, here in swinging Sunnydale."
Willow answered, "Thanks Wesley. We'll be there." She reached over and shut off the screen.
"We will? And who is this Master Evil?"
"Giles, are you feeling alright- he's your evil nemesis. The Master Vampire who wants to open the Hellmouth and rule the world? Did you hit your head or something?"
"I think perhaps I did. I'm sorry Mrs. Calendar. I'll try to remember." He shook his head in confusion as the Citroen sped toward the club.
Once inside the Electric Psychadelic Slayers Club, Giles felt no more at ease than before. Willow tapped his shoulder and told him, "Be on the lookout for any of Master Evil's minions, okay?"
She moved away from him a bit, scanning the dance floor. Just then a waitress came up and asked if he wanted a drink. He looked at her and noticed something strange- this woman had a 5 o'clock shadow! He hurried over to Willow's side and motioned toward the person, exclaiming- "Willow, I think that waitress is a man!" Willow looked over and round-housed what did indeed turn out to be a man- in fact it was Willy the Snitch!
"Good work, Giles!", Willow gasped as she grabbed Willy by the collar, pulling him off the floor. "Willy- where is Master Evil???"
"I swear I don't work for him anymore! I dunno where he is!"
"Oh right and I suppose that's why you are dressed in a miniskirt and go-go boots?" muttered Giles sarcastically.
"Okay, fine, you got me. He's downstairs, waiting for you to find him. He only needs a few more kills before he will open the hellmouth for good, and all the evil spills out into this realm, yada yada yada…"
Willow dropped the snitch and headed for the stairs, followed closely by a stunned Watcher- really this couldn't be more confusing! They headed down the stairs quietly, and stole around the corner to where Master Evil was sure to be hiding. Ah yes, there he was, feasting on humans left and right.
"One more", he was heard to mutter, "and my EVIL plan will be complete!" Then he began to laugh altogether too long as he grabbed the neck of the last victim.
Giles looked to Willow. "Shouldn't we do something?"
"No, no Giles, this is the beginning of the fic- where the plot gets set up so later on you can defeat him yourself. Wait and see."
Suddenly as if on cue, the ground began to shake and a horrible earthquake ripped through the building. A huge hole opened right in front of Master Evil and he fell in, just before the ground closed again, effectively trapping him inside. His followers ran, vowing to get him out and help take over the world at a later date.
Willow turned to her Watcher as the ground stopped shaking. "See Giles. I told you. But what will we do if Master Evil ever escapes? I know, I will use my burgeoning Witch skills to freeze you with a spell and we'll unfreeze you when he comes back to terrorize the world!"
Giles eyes widened in horror. "But…" It was too late, Willow was already reciting and before he could protest, Rupert Giles, International Watcher of Mystery was in suspended animation.
30 years later…
The magic words echoed through the room, and with a resounding thud, the Watcher's spell encased body hit the floor of the Watcher's Council chambers.
"Wha… huh… mmph" were the random noises that escaped the lips of the confused man lying naked on the ground.
Wesley Wyndom Pryce looked to his counterpart, the new Slayer, Jenny Calendar, and smiled reassuringly. "He'll be right as rain in a minute, I promise."
As Giles came to, he looked around the room at the two other people in it, and then down at himself. EGADS! He was naked! He jumped up and ran to hide behind a large Corinthian Column. "Why on earth am I unclothed?" he asked full of annoyance and embarrassment.
Wesley spoke up. "Standard procedure old man. Everyone who goes into suspended animation must be completely nude."
"Well as I recall, I WASN'T nude when the spell was cast on me- why am I now?"
"Like I said standard procedure. We couldn't have you wearing out of date tweed when you awoke could we?"
Giles cleared his throat, thinking. "No, I suppose not. But may I have some new clothes new that I am unfrozen?"
"Oh yes, our Watcher's Council Tailor is already at work making your custom fit, state of the art suit. Now on to business. Mr. Giles, the Council has unfrozen you because Master Evil has escaped the Hellmouth and has plans to open it in an attempt to take over the world. It is 1997, and your partner on this assignment will be Ms. Calendar."
"Oh, yes. Where is Willow anyway? She was the one who put me under that dreaded spell in the first place- I really need to thank her." came the sarcastic reply from behind the column.
"No, Mr. Giles, not Mrs. Calendar- Miss Calendar. Jenny, Willow's daughter. She is a gyspy like her father's people and a very powerful slayer. Come out here and meet her."
"Not until I get my clothes, thank you! I really don't want to be meeting future co-workers with my bits and pieces showing!"
Jenny laughed at that, the first words she had uttered since releasing him from the spell. "Look, England, I don't know how you were raised, but I have been attending naked gypsy and pagan rituals since I was a child, so if you don't think I can handle the Giles full monty you are sadly mistaken."
"All the same I'd rather wait for my clothes thank you." It was at that moment that the tailor entered with the new suit for Giles. "Thank God!" he muttered as he stepped into the pants and put on the jacket and tie. "Much better." He said as he stepped out from behind the column.
Looking at Jenny Calendar for the first time, his eyes nearly popped out of their sockets. "My God, Jenny is beautiful. I'd really like to shag her on the hood of a police car." Realizing he had spoken the words out loud, he gasped, "I am so sorry- I don't know why I said that."
Wesley smiled at him in reassurance. "It's fine, Mr. Giles. Really- it's the spell's lingering effect on your brain. You'll probably have a hard time controlling your impulses and be speaking your thoughts aloud for a while."
"Oh, fantastic. Just what I need. Well, I'm never going to wake up from this dream unless we defeat this Master Evil character, so shall we get on with it?" he said impatiently.
Both Wesley and Jenny looked at him strangely. Dream? What was he talking about? They shrugged, assuming it was part of the spell's effect on his brain, and escorted him to main headquarters.
Master Evil's Underground Lair
"Ladies & Gentlemen, welcome to my underground lair. I have gathered here before me the world's deadliest Vampires."
At the head of the table sat Master Evil surrounded by his cohorts. "I thank you all for waiting patiently for me to free myself from the grasp of that cave in. Some of you I know, some of you I am meeting for the first time. Frau Darla Farbissina, leader of the millitant wing of the Catholic School Girls, Musta-Spike, Luke O'Brien, ex-Vessel and Slayer Assasin. I would like you all to meet my number 2 Vamp- Angelus."
Angelus appears from behind a sliding door carrying a brief case and wearing an eyepatch. "Angelus tell them our new plan for taking over the world and opening the Hellmouth."
"It has come to my attention that a slayer, Ms. Jenny Calendar, has been tracking us, and had brought about the reanimation of Rupert Giles, International Watcher of Mystery, Master Evil's nemesis. Our intention is to kidnap the slayer and ransom her to get Rupert Giles here so that we may kill him in an elaborate plan that will no doubt backfire on us."
Musta-Spike cleared his throat. "Don't mean to be a pain in the arse, but, why are we ransoming her? Why not just kill her in front of his face- you know rip her lungs out or something with style?"
"Silence!" The Master swore angrily, then reached down and pushed a button next to his seat. Suddenly Musta-Spike's seat tipped backward, dropping him through the floor onto a bed of wooden stakes. He screamed in horror as they plunged though him. "Let that be a reminder to you all that this organization will not tolerate questioning of my plans- got it?"
The rest of the group nodded in silence. "Good, now back to-" He was interrupted by a faint cry from the pit.
"Could somebody get me out of this bloody mess? I'm not dead, I'm just badly punctured."
Master Evil cleared his throat and continued. "…the plan. We will ransom the slayer to lure-"
Again he was interrupted. "Somebody- please? I'm in a bleeding lot of pain down here! I think I might need a wheelchair."
Master Evil picked up a phone to his right. "Yes. He's down there. No not dust- punctured. Badly. Right…" He hung up the phone and continued. "We will lure Mr. Giles here, and after we capture him-"
"It's about bleeding time mate! No, what are you doing with that holy water? Bastard- you burned me! Why did you do that? I'll have your bollocks tied to a tree you- what's with the stake? Hey!"
Finally it was silent and Master Evil finished his explanation of the plan. "…we'll kill him and then open the hellmouth and take over the world. Any questions?"
Frau Darla spoke. "Master, what are we planning on asking for ransom?"
"Why blood of course! One Million Pints!" And with that Master Evil began to cackle incessantly, and joined by his minions, they began to set their evil plan into action.
Back at Watcher's Council Headquarters
Giles sat across from Jenny, discussing their plans to research Master Evil. He was obviously nervous to be around her, though she couldn't figure out why.
Jenny continued to debrief him. "So anyway, we go into the club disguised as a married couple, and we see if we can't find some of Master Evil's henchmen, and trick them into telling us their plan, and why are you staring at me cause it's really driving me crazy!"
Rupert jumped visibly. "Oh, um, I apologize, Ms. Calendar, it's just that, well you're so beautiful, and I haven't seen you in so long, and oh my god I said that out loud again didn't I?"
Jenny laughed at his obvious discomfort again. "Yes you did. What do you mean you haven't seen me in so long?"
Rupert cleared his throat and looked away. "Nothing. So are you ready to go? To the club?"
Jenny nodded her head and grabbed her coat, and together they headed out to the Citroen.
20 minutes later…
Jenny and Rupert walked into the front door of what used to be the Electric Psychedelic Slayer's Club, now simply known as the Bronze, which was still a dance club that catered to the youth of Sunnydale.
Jenny scanned the room. "I know some of Master Evil's minions have been hanging out here- there they are at that table. Let's go."
Together they sat down at the table, where Angelus and Drusilla sat engaged in conversation.
Jenny motioned for Rupert to speak. "Um, yes, hallo! My name is…um..it's…" He looked to Jenny, panic-stricken, and unable to come up with false names. She jumped in to rescue him.
"He's Willhelm Snyder, and I'm his wife Juanita." She smiled at Rupert, who rolled his eyes at the ridiculous names she had come up with.
Angelus looked at them suspiciously. "I'm Angelus, and this is my companion, Drusilla."
Jenny, always impatient, jumped on Angelus before he could continue. "So, Angel, can I call you Angel? What do you do for a living?"
Drusilla gave her a strange look. "Nobody calls my Angel Angel but me." She looked at him, and pointed at Jenny. "I don't like these two- they reek of goodness."
Jenny raised her eyebrows at the strange girl, and ignored her comment. Giles decided it was his turn to ask. "So what do you do, Mr. Angelus? Anything exciting?"
"Not really. Nothing interesting to you I am sure." Angelus continued to ignore their presence. Aggravated that they were getting nowhere, Jenny stood and grabbed Rupert's arm. "Well, nice to meet you, we're going to go dance now." She pulled him unceremoniously to the floor, where they began to sway back and forth. Over his shoulder, Jenny continued to keep an eye on the vampires.
When they got up to leave, she whispered into Giles' ear, "They're leaving, let's follow them!"
"Um, yes, of course, if that's what you want to do… I think that would be fine." He shook himself out of his daze. It had been so lovely to have Jenny in his arms again, he had completely forgotten about the assignment. She grabbed his hand and they were out the door again.
Master Evil's Underground Lair
"Master Evil, remember how we were trying to figure out a way to create a son for you through the implantation of female vampires with fertilized eggs?" Frau Darla looked positively ecstatic as she questioned her master.
Master Evil raised an eyebrow. "Yes."
"Well after a couple of years trying, we finally got it right. Would you like to meet your son?"
Master Evil looked almost, dare I say it?, happy. He nodded, and Frau Darla let out an inhuman screech. "OZZZZZZZZZZZZ!"
With a loud slam of a bedroom door, a young man, roughly 18 years old, with spiky red hair came waltzing into the main room. "Hey" was all he said.
Master Evil looked at the boy. "Oz, I'm your Father."
The boy looked him up and down, expressionless. "Huh."
"Is that all you have to say?"
"Well, yeah." A long pause. "So you're my dad? And you're an Evil Vampire who wants to destroy the world?"
Master Evil looked at Frau Darla as if to say, what's with this kid?, then looked back at his son and shook his head in the affirmative.
"Huh. That's fairly freaksome." He turned and started to walk back into his room. Master Evil called out to his boy. "Oz, wait."
He turned. "Yeah?"
"Don't you want some kind of explanation of where I've been your whole life or why I am so determined to take over the world?"
Oz took a moment, appearing to think it over. "Nah. I gotta go work on my E flat Diminished 9th. See you later." And with another loud slam of the door, he was gone.
Master Evil looked at his henchmen gathered around the table. "I think that went pretty well, don't you?"
Angelus and Drusilla had separated, and Rupert Giles, International Watcher of Mystery had followed the male out the back door into the alley, where the vampire had literally disappeared.
"Damn." He muttered to himself as he stepped back inside the club. Well, he thought, perhaps I can find Jenny and get another dance before we leave.
He walked back to their table, and not seeing her, decided to look around the club. 10 minutes later, having searched the entire bar for her and finding no trace, he sat down at their table to wait.
He waited for what seemed like an eternity before a waitress came up to him and asked, "Are you Rupert Giles?"
"Yes, actually I am. Do I know you?"
"No, but someone left a note for you." She handed him a folded napkin.
"Thank you." He said taking it from her. As she walked away, he opened it. It read: "Thank you so much for falling into my trap so easily. I have Jenny Calendar. If you want to see her alive again, tell the Watcher's Council to deliver One Million Pints of blood to my Secret Underground Lair by midnight tomorrow. Otherwise, she dies." It was signed Master Evil.
"Dear God! They've got Jenny!" He stood and ran for the door.
Outside the Bronze
Giles was busy searching the alley where he lost Angel for some kind of secret passage- he couldn't have disappeared so quickly if there wasn't one. He had his head behind his dumpster when his watch began ringing. He was so startled he hit his head against the brick wall.
He regained his composure and pressed a button on the side of the watch. Wesley's face popped up on the face of his Indiglo.
"Hallo Rupert! Making any progress with the Master Evil Henchmen?"
"Well, yes and no. We did make contact with them, and followed them when they split up. But…"
"Well, they captured Jenny and the won't give her up unless the Watcher's Council delivers 1 million pints of blood to them by tomorrow at midnight."
"Good, God man! How could you let them capture her? She's the most powerful slayer the world has known since the Middle Ages! And do have any idea what a ridiculous ransom 1 million pints of blood is?"
"Yes, I thought that too, but then again they are vamp… Oh Nevermind that! I have to save her before they hurt her!"
"No, Giles, I really suggest heading back here and letting us take care of this one, old boy. I mean, you are the one who let her get taken in the first place."
"Quite right Wesley. And so it seems only right that I should be the one to save her. Giles out." Pressing the button on the watch and hanging up on Wesley made him feel a little bit better about having failed in his duties. But that was neither here nor there- he had no time to mope around. He had a woman to save!
He went back to searching along the walls of the alleyway. It has to be here somewhere, he thought. If only I knew where to look! He put his palm against the wall, leaning on it for a moment while he thought. Suddenly a door slid open, and he knew he had found what he was looking for. He lifted his palm to reveal a fake brick that protruded slightly from the wall. Aha! So that's where the trigger was. He shook his head at the stupidity of having a secret passage to an evil underground lair in an alleyway. No wonder Willow and Xander always referred to them as the Scooby Gang!
Master Evil's Underground Lair
"Welcome, Miss Calendar. I hope your authentically recreated gypsy wear fits you properly. I designed it myself."
Jenny looked down at the floor-length ragged-looking ruffled skirt; the billowing white linen shirt that laced up the front, and knew the vampire in front of her was crazy. She shook her head and the enormous hoop earrings in her ears jangled, and she attempted to rip off the red scarf, which was tied around her head. One of the guards grabbed her hand, preventing her from removing the headwear. She felt like she was in a bad Halloween costume from 3rd grade. Who thought Gypsy's dressed like this? When he opened his mouth to speak again, she was surprised it wasn't to ask her to tell him his fortune.
"Now, as I am sure you've figured out, we'll be holding you for quite a large ransom. You see, we know that the Watchers would do anything to save you, but it would take them far too long to amass that amount of blood. So I am sure your hero, Rupert Giles, International Watcher has already been deployed to save you."
"He will save me, too, and there's nothing you can do about it!"
"Oh have no fear, I'm counting on it." He held his pinky to his mouth and started cackling, followed by the rest of his cohorts.
Just then, Oz poked his head out of his room. He looked at Miss Calendar's getup and cocked an eyebrow. "Is it Halloween already? I don't have a costume…"
His father beamed as he entered the room. "Oz my boy, come meet daddy's enemy, the Slayer."
"Slayer? Weren't they a band from the 80's?"
His father ignored the comment. "Oz, this is Jenny Calendar, Miss Calendar, this is my son Oz."
She scoffed "Oz? What kind of name is that? Where's The Wicked Witch and Toto?"
Oz again pondered. "Now I know Toto was an 80's band, but I don't know the Wicked Witch. Did she have any hits?"
Jenny rolled her eyes. "Nevermind. So that's your dad, kid? Gosh you must be proud."
"Yeah, he's an evil mastermind. It's neat."
Master Evil smiled. "Now, my dear Miss Calendar. We wait for your Watcher." Again, he cackled incessantly, followed by his minions.
Inside Master Evil's Underground Lair
Giles walked quickly and quietly along the dark hallway. So far he had escaped detection by the Evil Henchmen, but luck only lasts so long. As he stepped forward, almost to the light at the end of the passageway, he heard a loud alarm sound. Drat!
He sprinted toward the exit, only to be met by 5 Vampire Henchmen. He punched one in the face, and ducked the blow of another. Reaching into his pocket, he pulled out a miniature crossbow and fired it directly into the heart of one of the Vamps. As he re-loaded, another came at him, and he lunged forward, flipping the unsuspecting demon over his shoulder. He grabbed the arm of another and flung him into the two that were running at him. While they were attempting to pick themselves up off the ground, he burst forward and into the main meeting room of Master Evil's underground lair.
There sat the head honchos of the evil organization at a round table, with Jenny tied to a chair at the far end. Master Evil's voice echoed in the room.
"Welcome, Mr. Giles. I suggest you stop right there. You see, that chair the lovely Ms. Calendar is tied to is positioned over a trap door that will drop her directly into the hellmouth, where she will be consumed by the demon that dwells there. If you want her to live, drop your weapon."
Fearing for Jenny's life, he did as he was told. "I assure you Master Evil, you will not get away with your plan to kill the Slayer."
"Oh my dear man, you still think that's our plan? How sad." He chuckled and continued. "Our plan was never to kill Ms. Calendar. Without the knowledge you provide her, the Slayer is almost helpless in her task to rid the world of our kind. So you see, Mr. Giles, the plan has always been to kill you. Our capture of Ms. Calendar was simply a guise to lure you here. One which you fell into quite nicely, don't you think?"
Just then, Oz appeared from his room. "Hey Dad, you wanna hear this new song I just wrote? It's called…" Giles, who had grabbed the boy, and slapped a hand over his mouth, cut off his statement.
"Ahh, so this is your son, Master Evil?" He grabbed a gun from a nearby guard. "I suggest you let Ms. Calendar go, or, as these Americans say, he gets it!"
Master Evil looked to Frau Darla. "Can't you create another one?"
She shook her head in the affirmative. "Ah, well, it was nice to meet you Oz, but Evil plans to dominate the world always take precedence."
Giles had let his hand slip from the shocked boy's mouth. "Yeah, well I see your point, but I kinda don't want to die."
"Sorry son." Master Evil motioned for the guards to grab Rupert.
"Wait!" The guards paused at the word from Angelus. "So you're just going to kill the two of them and continue with your plan, giving me no credit for keeping your minions loyal for the past 30 years. And then I suppose you get control of the world, turn it into a hell on earth, and let everyone think I am just a useless number 2 man? I don't think so, pal!" Angelus pulled a stake out of his pocket and, before anyone could stop him, dove for Master Evil, staking him in the heart.
Frau Darla, Luke, and Drusilla screamed as they watched their Master turn to dust, only his bones remaining. They ran straight for Angelus, where they began to attack him. In the ensuing fight, Giles and Jenny were all but forgotten.
The Watcher ran for the Slayer, and cut her free of her restraints using a pocketknife. As he ungagged her, she kissed him quickly. "Thanks! Now, let's get the hell out of here."
As they headed for the exit, Master Evil's son stopped them. He looked up at Rupert. 'You weren't really going to kill me, were you?"
"Actually, no. Despite the fact that your father is Master Evil, you seem to be a normal young man."
"Cool. Then I think I should tell you that my dad was wired in case anyone ever tried to stake him. He had a remote control device wired over his heart that would set off a series of explosions 2 minutes after a stake penetrated it. So you better hurry."
Jenny looked at the boy. "Thanks." She grabbed Rupert's hand and headed toward the secret passage. They paused at the entrance, and looked back at the boy. "Well, aren't you coming?"
He smiled, glad that someone wanted him around. "Okay." He ran and followed the Watcher and Slayer out the door.
Outside Master Evil's Lair
Jenny and Rupert sprinted from the secret passage's entrance in the Bronze's alley straight toward the Citroen. Following closely on their heels was Master Evil's quite normal son. As they reached the car, Rupert threw open the passenger side door, ushered Jenny in, and ran to the driver's side while she unlocked the back door for Oz.
As the car pulled out of the lot, tires squealing, the building which housed the teen dance club behind them blew up, spraying the surrounding area with brick and other debris, and exhaling a large cloud of noxious fumes into the air.
Giles stomped on the brakes, and spun the car as he did so, completing a 180-degree turn so the car was facing the destruction. Oz sat in the back seat staring at the rubble, a look on his face that must have been awe, but looked so much like his other expressions it was hard to tell. Giles and Jenny opened their doors and stepped out into the street.
Giles looked over at Jenny from across the hood of the car. "My god that was a close call. Are you alright?"
She smiled at her Watcher. "Yes, I'm fine. Thanks to you."
Giles blushed, then cleared his throat. "Yes, well, perhaps we should make sure none of them got out alive?"
"Okay." The couple started to walk back toward the building, when seemingly from out of nowhere Luke O'Brien sprang out from beneath a piece of crumbled wall. He grabbed Giles by the throat, ready to sink his teeth in, when Jenny whirled and threw a roundhouse kick to his face, knocking him off the stunned Watcher. Before he hit the ground she stepped closer and hit him with two jabs to his chin, then spun again and back kicked him to the pavement, where she neatly leaned over and shoved a stake straight into his heart.
Giles stood from his position on the ground and dusted himself off. "Well, I suppose we're quite even now. Thank you, Miss Cal… um, Jenny."
"You're very welcome Rupert. And maybe we better go call in for back up before we search through any more of the building."
"Quite right- very good idea." He held out his hand to her, and she took it and followed him back to the car. As they approached, they noticed Oz waving to them.
"Hey, um, Mr. Giles? Your ashtray is beeping." He pointed to the area of the dashboard where the closed circuit connection to Watcher's Council Headquarters was located. Seating himself in the driver's seat, he pushed the right radio knob and again, up popped Wesley Wyndom Pryce.
"Hallo Rupert! We've been trying to get in touch with you. We were surveying the area when one of the helicopters spotted the explosion. Are you alright?"
"Yes, Wesley, we're fine. Thanks for asking." Giles looked over at Jenny who had seated herself in the passenger seat and taken his hand in hers. "We're more than fine I'd say…" And without another word he leaned in and kissed her, ignoring the continued request for information from Wesley.
"Excellent show! Was Master Evil defeated? Giles? Jenny? Anyone? Hello…"
"Jenny, Oh, Jen…" Giles sat straight up in bed. What was going on? Where was he? He looked at the clock, which read 4:35 am, and at his surroundings, which appeared to be his bedroom, with all his usual things surrounding him.
He shook his head. Rupert Giles, International Watcher of Mystery? What had he been dreaming? Oh, he thought, this just serves me right for going to see such an inane movie. Miss Calendar, the slayer? How strange.
He rolled over and attempted to get the silly dream out of his head. Then a thought struck him. He jumped out of bed and went straight to the window, peering out into the driveway.
Relief washed over him as he saw his Citroen sitting there, it's normal old non-descript color. He shuffled back to bed. He lay down and attempted to go back to sleep, trying his hardest to convince himself that he hadn't wanted to find the Union Jack painted on the car's hood.