Five reasons Dawn knew she loved Dean
A/N: I own nothing, Kripe owns Supernatural while Whedon owns all things Buffy
Five reasons Dawn knew she loved Dean
1. He made her feel beautiful
She was attractive, she knew that. Not beautiful, not sexy, but she was attractive. She had nice legs and full lips, and according to Faith, she had the best ass this side of Cleveland. But growing up with a down right gorgeous sister and her insanely beautiful friends, she never felt beautiful in her entire life. Never felt more than averagely attractive.
Then she started traveling with the Winchester boys. Sammy, he was like the big brother-slash-best friend that she never had. They clicked on so many levels but not sexually. He was hot as hell but there was never a spark of attraction. Dean, on the other hand, made her tremble. He looked at her and it made her go to goo. Literal goo. Luckily, she’d gotten over her habit of babbling like an idiot when confronted with cute boys, but just barely. She still babbled but not as badly as she did when she was sixteen.
She had no idea what Dean thought of her, whether he found her to be a nuisance or thought of her as he did Jo, like a little sister. He called her princess, half the time she thought he didn’t know her real name. He tried to protect her on hunts, even though she didn’t need it, and always tried to boss her around. And sometimes she would catch him staring at her (he would always look away when she caught him) like he wanted her to go the hell away. Or at least that’s what she always assumed the look meant. She asked Sam two months into traveling with them if Dean wanted her to leave but he said no. She figured he was lying but never called him on it.
But that all changed a week after she asked Sammy if she should leave. They were tracking a demon, a slimy ass demon that was possessing and killing children. It took them a week to find the demon and one hellova fight to kill it. Dean and Sam were both pretty roughed up but she got the brunt of it, mostly due to the fact that she used herself as a distraction when it was pummeling on her boys. And they were her boys, Sammy her best friend and Dean the man she was starting to fall for.
“What the fuck were you thinking?” Dean shouted, kneeling beside her on the ground, his hands and eyes roaming over her body. “That thing could have killed you.”
“I’m fine, Dean,” Dawn shivered when his hand ran over the side of her breast, a place that no one but her and a doctor had touched. “He just roughed me up a bit.”
“You’re bleeding, you’re going to have a black eye, and your jaw is already bruised,” Dean said.
“Won’t be winning any beauty pageants, huh?” Dawn smiled. “Not that I would have before.”
“What?” Dean frowned at her.
“Nothing,” Dawn shook her head. “Just me being silly.” She started to stand up but Dean’s hand on her shoulder stopped her.
“That’s the second time you’ve said something like that,” Dean said, staring at her in that ‘go the hell away from him’ way that he had. “About not being beautiful.”
“It’s called realism, Dean,” Dawn said. “And not something I’m going talk to you about.”
He was staring at her again, his green eyes locked on hers, looking at her in a way nobody’s ever looked at her. Then slowly, his hand cupped her jaw, the not bruised part, his finger rubbing over her broken lip. She could hear Sammy behind them, most likely gathering their weapons and crap, but all she could focus on was Dean. Slowly, he leaned forward and pressed his lips against hers, mindless to the demon slime, vamp dust, and blood that was covering her body.
She‘d only kissed two boys since the vampire when she was fifteen, a boy she met in Rome and one that she met in Cleveland. Too much time spent finding slayers, researching crap with Giles, and spending time with Angel and Spike, both of whom would strangle a boy for looking at her. When she started traveling with her boys, she thought she would have the opportunity to hook up but Dean was almost worse than Spike and Angel with scaring off the boys. So to say the least, she had almost no experience with kissing let alone sex. But evidently Dean didn’t care or notice because he deepened the kiss, his tongue slipping past her lips.
He made her tremble and go to jelly, her body falling against his while his mouth ate at hers. The kiss lasted for minutes but felt like it was over in seconds, his forehead leaning against hers while they caught their breaths.
And right there, with three words, he made her feel beautiful even while she was covered in slime.
“You’re so beautiful,” he whispered, pressing a kiss against her forehead.
And she believed him and for the first time in her life, felt beautiful. But only because of him.
2. She had sex with him….with Sam in the room
They had sex in ‘The Impala’ more times than she could count. It wasn’t comfortable, there wasn’t much room and the glow of car sex had worn of weeks ago. Sometimes they did it in bathrooms or alleys, both of which were gross as hell. Occasionally, while Sammy was out getting supplies or researching, they would get some time alone. Those were the best times and even though they had to rush most of the time, at least that got to be naked.
She knew it frustrated Dean that she wouldn’t have sex while Sammy was sleeping. He never pushed her about it or even really brought it up anymore, but she knew him well enough to know it frustrated him. Dean was pretty open about sex, didn’t bother him where or when, as long as he got it. She knew from Sam that Dean used to bring girls back to the hotel or go to their places, not really caring if they were alone or not. Dean was just that open about it.
She, on the other hand, was a bit more conservative about sex. She was always so nervous doing it in public places that she almost didn’t enjoy it….almost. And the thought of doing it with Sammy sleeping next them drove her to a near panic. She didn’t know why though. Sammy flat out told her as long as they kept it quiet and didn’t use his bed, he didn’t care what they did. It just seemed so weird to her. So something that she would be too self-conscious to do.
They were in bed now, Dean wrapped around her, his hand resting over her belly under the tee-shirt she slept in. Sammy was in the other bed, snoring away, and she could tell Dean was close to falling asleep. And she was horny. Had been since Dean crawled into bed with her and slid his hands under her clothes. He said he didn’t sleep right if he couldn’t feel her skin. Before, she would have had to stop his hands from slipping into her panties and trying to get her to have sex. Which she knew wasn’t completely about sex, though it mostly was. Dean just wanted to be with her. But he stopped trying weeks ago because he knew she didn’t want to. But he did.
When it came down to it, her inhibitions kept her from doing it. Dean had already worked through most of her other inhibitions (i.e. sex in public, public displays of affection, phone sex, and stripping) but she just couldn’t get through the idea of having sex with someone in the same room. Six months ago, she would have never even thought about thinking about doing it. Then came Dean and he pretty much changed her mind about a lot of her misconceptions when it came to sex, boys, and love. When it came to life really.
With a sigh, she scooted back into his body, lifting her right leg up to rest on top of his hip.
“Princess,” Dean growled warningly into her ear, his hand tightening over her belly.
“Hmm?” Dawn murmured, her hand moving to rest over his on her belly for a second, before sliding up her body to squeeze one of her breasts. She moaned lowly, gyrating her hips lightly against his.
“Jesus,” Dean groaned. “Sweetheart, what’re ya doing?”
“Playing,” Dawn murmured, her other hand sliding over her his on her belly and then lower, pushing past the elastic of her panties. She was wet and due to the quietness of the hotel room, it wasn’t hard to make out the sound of her finger working between her folds. “Don’t you want to play with me?”
And that’s all it took. Seconds later, she was flat on her back with Dean’s head between her thighs, licking her clit through her fingers. It wasn’t gentle or slow, he literally devoured her pussy until she had to bite her arm to keep from screaming. Evidently though, it wasn’t enough because Sammy fumbled for the remote and turned on the tv.. But she didn’t care because Dean’s fingers were inside her, stretching her, and his mouth was at her breasts. And it was so good that her entire family could have walked in the room and she wouldn’t have cared.
“Taste so good, princess,” Dean murmured against her breasts, his fingers working deeper and harder inside her. “So tight. So perfect.”
“Inside, Dean,” Dawn pleaded. “Please Dean, I need to feel you inside me. You feel so good, so big. Makes me feel full.”
Dean growled around her nipple, teeth biting down lightly before sliding up her body to find her mouth. He entered her with one hard thrust, making her eyes roll back in her head.
She had to bite down on his shoulder when she came, making him pulse and jerk inside her. He came right after her, groaning lowly, his hands fisted on each side of her head.
“Mmm, sweetheart, what got into you?”
“You,” Dawn wrapped her legs around his, her feet tucking between his calves.
Dean chuckled against her neck. “Cute.” He tried to roll off her but she stopped him. “Princess, I gotta be smashing you.”
“You are but it’s a good smash,” Dawn said. “I like you on top of me, it makes me feel safe.”
“You are safe,” Dean murmured. “Nothin’ll ever touch you….except for me.”
And he was right and it wasn’t just about sex. It was about them.
3. She knocked a cop and broke them out of jail
She told him to let her go, to let her get the intel but he was a stubborn ass and didn’t like the way she got information. Which was basically the same way he did, by flirting with whomever they were trying to get the information from. But apparently, it was inappropriate for her to use her sexuality to get information but quite alright for him. Which pissed her off, even though she’d pretty much accepted it. Her boyfriend was a bit chauvinistic. Not in the way that he thought he was better than her, but in the way that he thought he had to protect her. Never mind the fact that she could take him in a fight as often as he took her (an act guaranteed to get him hard as steel), it was just the way he was. And most of her liked it, loved the possessive part of Dean. She liked when he got all territorial, arm wrapping over her belly as he pulled her against him, basically telling everyone that she belonged to him. But it didn’t mean that the chauvinism didn’t piss her off sometimes. Like right now.
With a sigh, she threw her eyeliner back into her makeup bag, which she tossed into her satchel. She’d already packed and loaded all their crap into the Impala, so they were basically ready to roll. The hunt wasn’t finished but that wasn’t the most important thing to worry about now. Getting her boys out of jail was.
She fluffed the blonde wing she wearing, a ’Hannah Montana’ wig that she picked up at Wal-Mart down the street from their hotel. She was wearing the shortest skirt she owned, a jean skirt that ended just under her ass cheeks, paired with the one pair of high heels that she brought, a pair of three inch stiletto heels that made her about Dean’s height. Her eye makeup was dark and her lips plush and glossy. A tight, blood-red silk backless bikini-type shirt finished off her look, her cleavage looking rather impressive if she said so herself. She’d only worn the outfit once, on Dean’s birthday when she stripped for him. Needless to say, he was going to have a heart attack when he saw her wearing it in public.
The drive to the police station was short and quiet, her hands tense around the steering wheel. She’d never drove The Impala without Dean beside her. She parked around the back, a block over, and then calmly walked around the front, ignoring the catcall from some teenage boys across the street.
Luckily, they were in a small town, one of those small towns that only had a sheriff and a deputy. It was actually like Mayberry. She walked into the station, her hips swaying side to side. She subtly glanced around, noting the lack of cameras with a sigh of relief. Her disguise would hopefully keep anyone from ever knowing what she really looked like because her sister would flip out if she ended up with a police record. It would make the fights she’d had with Buffy over Dean and Sammy a thousand times more intense.
“Can I help you miss?” A large, slightly husky man in his mid-twenties to early thirties asked, his arms resting on a counter as he looked over at her.
Licking her lips, she leaned forward on the counter, mentally cheering as his eyes settled on her boobs and didn’t look away. She’d seen Faith hypnotize men with her breasts but didn’t think she had the power. “I’m kinda lost, do you have map or something I can look at?” Dawn asked in her best ‘Valley Girl’ impersonation.
“Um, yeah, sure, down the hall,” he murmured, eyes still trained on her breasts.
“That way?” Dawn pointed the way she came in.
“No miss, down that hallway,” he said. “I can show you.”
“Oh my god, that would be so great,” Dawn smiled brightly. “I suck with directions. I always get lost. I guess you wouldn’t know how that feels, being sheriff and all.”
“I’m the deputy, miss,” he said. “The sheriff isn’t in.”
“Oh,” Dawn bit her lip in what she hoped was a seductive manor. She wasn’t completely sure if it worked, Dean pretty much found everything she did to be seductive; she didn’t know what sort of effect she’d have on other men. “Is something big happening? It must be so scary being a cop.”
“Somebody broke into a local museum and stole an statue,” he said. “Sheriff Dempsy is headed to their hotel to search it.”
“Then I should probably get out of your hair,” Dawn said. “If you’ll show me your map, I can go.”
“Right this way,” he said, placing a hand on the small of her back. She had to fight a cringe when his thumb rubbed against her skin; she didn’t like anyone but Dean touching her. So much that just the thought of ever having sex with someone else made her want to puke. But she let him led her down the hall, his hand touching her back in a way that would warrant sexual harassment charges under most circumstances. Even more so when his hand slid down to rub against her ass. Dean would have a freakin’ heart attack. The deputy pointed to the map, showing her the route out of town.
She cut him off mid-direction by slamming his face against the wall. He dropped like a bag of rocks. He was heavy, she about killed herself dragging his ass to a closet and as she was leaving, she grabbed his cuffs and keys; they would come in handy sometime.
The office was small, only one interview room and a small cell that currently only had two occupants, one of which was glaring at her like she was the devil come to life.
“What the hell are you wearing?” Dean growled.
“You should know, you bought it,” Dawn unlocked the cell, holding The Impala keys out to him. “And if you had listened to me, this would have never been necessary; I could have gotten the intel and statue without getting arrested.”
With quick, angry motions that said there would be a fight about it later, Dean whipped off his jacket and dropped it over her shoulders. “Put that on.”
“Stop being an ass, Dean,” Dawn rolled her eyes.
“Come on Dean, we need to get out of here,” Sammy said.
“Yeah, before the sheriff comes back,” Dawn agreed. “The deputy said he’s checking out our hotel and we should leave before he realizes we‘ve left.”
“Where’s the deputy?” Dean grabbed her hand, their fingers interlocking as he lead them out of the station.
“In a closet,” Dawn said. “Where I dragged him after I knocked him out.”
They both paused to stare at her.
“What, did you think I slept with him to get you out?” Dawn arched a brow.
Dean smacked her on the ass.
“Hey,” Dawn grumbled. “What is up with the ass touching? It’s because of the short skirt, isn’t it, I think…”
“Who else touched your ass?” Dean interrupted, the possessive scowl that makes her heart melt crossing his face.
“Um, the deputy,” Dawn said sheepishly.
Dean’s reaction was swift and took both her and Sammy to drag him away from the closet and out to The Impala, with her boyfriend grumbling the entire way. The threats he muttered under his breath were rather impressive if not a bit violent.
Then, hours later, while her head was resting on his thigh as he drove back towards Bobby’s, Dean’s hand rubbed over her hair.
“Mmm?” Dawn murmured, turning so her face was against his stomach.
“You broke us out of jail,” Dean murmured.
“Yep,” Dawn agreed.
“Pretty sure you’re the best girlfriend there ever was,” Dean said quietly.
Dawn kissed his belly and then settled her face more fully onto his lap. It was starting to worry her to what extents she would go to for Dean. She was starting to wonder if the wasn’t anything she wouldn’t do for him.
4. She shot a human without thinking twice about it
She’d been hunting with them for nine mouths and sleeping with Dean for almost half of that time. What they hunted was different than what she grew up around, in some ways scarier and in some ways not. Their methods were also different, more guns and fire than actual hand-to-hand and swords. She’d never used a gun before traveling with her boys and could say at first, she had no desire to do so. But Dean insisted that she had to learn so she let him teach her.
It wasn’t as bad as she thought. Once she understood guns, she realized they weren’t what haunted her dreams for so long after Tara’s death. They were still scary, so much power in such a small bit of metal, but they didn’t kill people. People killed people. The bullet didn’t kill Tara, Warren did, the bullet was just the means. She was a decent shot, according to Dean, and he felt more comfortable if she carried a gun while they were on a hunt.
She’d used it more times than she could count, mostly on ghosts and spirits. She’d shot a demon or two, just to slow them down cuz bullets generally didn’t kill demons. She knew how to use guns but she never thought she’d use one against a human.
They’d been hunting something, Dean thought it was a demon while Sammy thought it was a shape shifter, for four days without any luck. Then they got a tip so the boys went out to investigate it while she had yet another fight with her sister over her traveling with the Winchesters.
The fight ended how most of her conversations with Buffy had ended in the last couple months, with her hanging up on her older sister after telling her to mind her own business. She tried to hide the fights from Dean as much as possible, she didn’t want him feeling guilty because Buffy couldn’t step back and let her live her life how she wanted to. The fights were getting worse than ever, with Buffy threatening to drag her back to Rome, regardless of what Dawn wanted. And she knew her sister well enough to know she’d do it if she got the chance. She paced the hotel room after she hung up on Buffy, wanting Dean to hurry up because he just made everything better. He made her forget that she might have a very simple choice to make sometime in the future.
But they didn’t come back. Not for a whole day and by the next morning, she was frantic and calling every hunter she could think of that might know what was going on. Bobby barely let her get the words out before he said he was on the way and she could honestly say she felt so relieved knowing he was coming. Bobby was like Giles, everything just felt more secure with him around. He told her to wait for him to get there but she couldn’t do it. She couldn’t sit still knowing Dean could be hurt or….she couldn’t even think of the other possibility, her brain wouldn’t go there.
She followed the path they took through town, mostly by asking around, looking for people that had seen them. Not many had and it wasn’t until she walked out to an old gas station that someone recognized Dean from the picture of her and him on her cell phone. The teller pointed a greasy finger down the road, giving her directions to an old farmhouse.
She walked it as quickly as she could, jogging most of the five miles to the farmhouse with Dean’s old Colt 1911 tucked into the back of her jeans. She knew when she got there that something was wrong. The Impala was roughed up, her boyfriend’s baby dented on the back and covered in thick dirt. The doors were hanging open, which Dean would never do, not with the bright sun.
Then she heard it, the unmistakable sound of fist hitting flesh followed by a grunt she knew belonged to Dean. She’d heard him grunt in too many different situations not to know what it sounded like. Grabbing the Colt and flicking off the safety, she quietly made her way around to the open door of the barn, glancing quickly around the door’s edge to look inside, just like Dean taught her to do. What she saw almost made her gasp out loud, she had to bite down on her tongue to keep from doing so.
Sammy looked pretty beat up but Dean looked like he went a few rounds with a slayer and got his butt royally kicked. They were both tied to chairs, with a tall black man standing over them, ranting about something. She didn’t pay attention to what he was saying. She was pretty sure she knew who it was, Gordon Walker, a hunter that Dean said wanted Sammy dead. And apparently wanted something out of them before he killed them and given the way Dean wasn’t saying anything, it was something they refused to tell.
Her plan was to sneak inside and knock Gordon out, then leave Dean and Sam to deal with him. That was her plan. But obliviously, her feet didn’t listen to her plan because she kicked an empty beer can and had three sets of eyes on her. And she knew by the look in Gordon’s eyes that he wouldn’t hesitate to kill her, could see it as clearly as she’d seen it in countless demons’ eyes. But even more important was the knife he picked up and moved, not towards her but towards Dean.
She didn’t think twice, didn’t hesitate, didn’t pause. Just lifted her arm, aimed, and pulled the trigger.
It became surreal after that. Gordan kinda jerked back slightly and then folded to the ground. Blood sprayed behind him and she could smell the gunpowder. The gun was hot, burning hot in her hand so she dropped it to the ground. Then she could smell the blood, the bitter, copper smell that she knew all too well.
“Princess, Dawn, baby, come here.”
She could hear Dean talking to her, pleading with her to move and she didn’t know why she wasn’t. Why was she just standing there? It took her a few moments to get her feet to move but she finally did, stopping when she encountered Gordon’s body. His eyes were open, staring up at her accusingly. She killed him. She killed a human being and she wasn’t sorry she did it. But why couldn’t she move?
“C’mon, Princess, you’re almost there,” Dean said, making her jerk her face up to look at him. He looked so sad but she didn’t know why.
“Dawnie, just go to Dean,” Sam said from behind her. She turned her head to look him. “Just a few more steps.”
She didn’t remember taking the step over Gordon’s body or the final few to Dean, barely remembered untying him, all she remembered was his strong arms wrapping around her as he carried her across the room to Sammy. He didn’t put her down while he cut the rope holding Sammy to his chair, just shifted her to one knee. And even though he looked like he was in pain, he held her tightly, whispering softly in her ear.
Sometime later, after she was clean and tucked into bed with Dean wrapped around her, she woke up screaming.
“I’m right here, Princess,” Dean pulled her into his lap. “Shhh, I’m right here.”
“I killed him,” Dawn whispered. “I didn’t…..he was going to kill you and I didn’t care about anything but stopping him.”
“I know, Princess,” Dean kissed her softly on the forehead. “I know.”
“I can’t lose you,” Dawn gripped his shoulders tightly. “I can’t….I don’t think I can live without you. And it scares me what I’m willing to do to make sure I never have to.”
“I know, Princess,” Dean cupped her chin, his thumbs wiping the tears off her face. “There isn’t anything I wouldn’t do to keep you.”
Dawn buried her face against his neck, fear still gripping her heart. It wasn’t nightmares of killing Gordon that woke her up; it was nightmares of her hesitating and Dean dying that woke her up screaming. Because for her, that was the scariest thing in the world.
5. She was willing to cut ties with the council for him
“You killed a human being and had Angel clean up the mess,” Buffy shouted. “And that is just one more thing in a long line of reasons why you are not staying with the Winchesters!”
“That isn’t your choice, Buffy,” Dawn shouted back. “That’s mine. And I didn’t have a choice, he was going to kill Dean.”
“You don’t know that for sure,” Buffy said. “Just because he had a knife didn’t mean he was going to slit Winchester’s throat. You said yourself you didn’t pause.”
“No, I didn’t,” Dawn agreed. “And if the choice came up again, I would do the same damn thing.”
“You dropped out of college, started hustling pool and have spent the last nine months traveling the world with credit card fraud artists,” Buffy said. “Dean Winchester has done nothing but corrupt and ruin your life and if you don’t leave, it’s only going to get worse.”
“You have no right to throw stones,” Dawn pointed off. “Your past relationships consisted of two vampires, an army guy that got off on being bit by vampires, and a college guy who used you for sex.”
“And I’ve learned from my mistakes,” Buffy glared at her. “You should too.”
“This is my life, not yours,” Dawn said. “And how I chose to live it is my business, not yours.”
“Not when you’re employed by the Watcher’s Council,” Buffy said. “Then it is my business.”
“Fine,” Dawn grabbed her purse and dug through it, tossing her cell phone onto the table. “I quit.”
Then, ignoring her sister’s yells, she walked out the door. Dean and Sammy were waiting in the foyer where she left them, both looking rather uncomfortable in Cleveland’s slayer headquarters. “Come on, let’s go.”
“You’re done already?” Dean arched a brow.
“Mm hmm,” Dawn nodded, ignoring her sister’s shout to stay. “Let’s just get out of here.”
Three months. Three months of not talking to anyone associated to the Watcher’s Council, including her two favorite vampires. She could admit it hurt, that it was painful but when it came down to choosing between Dean and her family, there wasn’t a choice. She wasn’t going to give Dean up and if Buffy was going to make her chose, she would. And she did.
Sammy and Dean tried to talk to her about it, both telling her to call Buffy, but she didn’t. Give Buffy an inch and the slayer would take a mile. And she’d end up on a private jet to Rome before she could blink. That was her biggest fear right now, that she would wake up, drugged in the back of a plane. Because she wouldn’t put it past her sister to do it.
“Princess, you gotta call her,” Dean pulled her on top of him, his feet locking around her ankles to keep her from moving. “I can’t stand coming between you two.”
“You didn’t,” Dawn said. “Buffy is the one that made it become an issue.”
“Because of me,” Dean said.
“Princess, I’m not stupid,” Dean cut her off. “I know this fight is about me. She doesn’t want you traveling with us.”
“She wants me to move back to Rome, go back to school, and date whatever boy she wants me to date,” Dawn said, smiling when Dean scowled. “She doesn’t care about my life, all she cares about is the life she wanted me to have, the life that she never got to live.”
“But it all boils down to having to chose between me and them,” Dean said.
“That’s not even a choice,” Dawn rested her forehead against him. “You’re it for me, the only thing that really matters. I love you, Dean Michael Winchester, more than anything in the world, including my sister.”
His eyes drifted close briefly and then his mouth dropped down to hers, saying everything she just did without words. The words would come, when he was ready, but for now, just feeling how he felt was enough.
And hours later, after she was pleasantly numb from awesome sex, Dean slipped his cell phone into her hand and kissed her forehead. “Call Buffy, she’s been calling me and Sammy nonstop for the past week.”
That only made her heart swell, the fact that Dean was so concerned about her relationship with her sister. It was one of the countless reasons that she loved him.