I don't own Buffy Summers, Xander Harris or any of the Ghostbusters. If I did, I would be older than I am now and possibly much richer.
BTVS was created by Joss Whedon and Ghostbusters were created by Dan Akroyd and Harold Ramis.
This is a work of fanfiction and not intended to be published for profit.
It had been a trying five days for the head of the Watcher's Council.
Five days of no results on the tracking spells they used on finding either a newly risen or the current Slayer. If Faith Lehane was alive, she was hidden by someone that really knew what they were doing.
It was a big if all things considered. On top of that, he had a whole cadre of inept people to choose from to be the next 'active' field Watcher. Most were idiots or political appointments. He had a choice to either get rid of a political ally or opponent. Either way, some of these kids were stupid.
He knew they'd been making the courses at the Watcher Academy more.... basic but they were scraping the barrel.
Nepotism was starting to become a systemic problem it seemed. Everybody knew somebody and more and more people were 'old families'.
It might become prudent to start recruiting street kids in the know again. Get some fresh blood into the academy. It would take at least five years before he could ram that through in the meetings. Until then...
He needed to contact Rupert Giles. Just in case Lehane made it to Sunnydale. The Hellmouth was known to obscure some tracking spells.
He tapped his fingers on his desk as he considered the time difference. It was already half past six and he promised he'd be home in time to watch Eastenders with his wife.
He'd call Giles tomorrow.
“Wait... have you even told Grandma Spengler about the wedding?” Alex asked as he fiddled with Janine's typewriter. It had been acting funny lately according to his soon to be Step-Mom. The lower case j's and t's had been hitting wrong.
She'd been writing some in her free time on it. What she was writing, he didn't know.
“No.” Egon said as he fiddled with his glasses. “If she knows, the the whole clan knows. You know they don't exactly approve of us. Especially since the 'blood has thinned'”
“Blonde hair and blue eyes are a recessive trait.” Alex snorted. “Just because almost every Spengler looks remarkably alike doesn't mean anything in the long run unless it's a curse.”
“We are descended from some strange Norsemen and Magic users.” Egon said with a shrug. “There are even tales of some who used to ride dragons.”
“The isle of Berk? Really?” Alex snorted. “Wasn't the Dragon in the well enough Dad?”
“For this lifetime, yes. It was.” Egon said with a nod. “Before that however....”
“You regressed again and didn't tell me didn't you?” Alex accused.
Egon shrugged. “I had to see something else than the life of a Wizard, Alex. I found it. For whatever reason, I've only had past lives within the family line. Whatever happened to Berk, happened after that lifetime. As for not inviting mother, we're leaving Janine's family out of it too. The only family going to be there is the one we've made here.”
“And my tagalongs.” Alex said with a sigh as he replaced the ribbon in the typewriter.
“They aren't so bad. Joyce and Ray seem to be hitting it off quite nicely. I suppose.” Egon told his son. “If what Janine has told me means anything.”
“Ray needs someone. Someone willing to put up with the fact he's practically a child himself sometimes.” Alex grinned.
“Sometimes.” Egon snorted.
“He still giggles when someone wants to use a Crystal Ball.” Alex laughed.
“Ball Gazing.” The two Spenglers said together before grinning at each other.
“Can't go wrong with the classics.” Egon sighed. “Okay... We'll send the families a notice. After the fact. I've met some of Janine's family. No. Just no.”
“Bee-hives and crying. Running Mascara.” Alex said as he stared off into the distance.
“So... we stick with the whole Justice of the Peace thing. Maybe that Judge we saved that one time.” Egon said with a nod.
“So is your family that....way?” Joyce asked Janine, the two women having heard the entire conversation.
“Annoying, manipulative and petty? You bet.” Janine agreed. “We decided on a courthouse marriage together. We didn't want outside interference. It's not about money or the lack of it. It's about two people making a commitment to each other. Families bring baggage to events like these. There is some dirty laundry I don't want aired. Neither of us do.”
“Are you sure you haven't been married before?” Joyce grinned.
“Nope. Just been to way too many of my cousins weddings. Ray isn't the only one with a big family.” Janine told her. “I can't tell you how many have ended with either heels or blood in the punch bowl.”
With the girls.... at Ray's Occult Bookstore...
“This is still pretty fuckin' weird.” Faith muttered as she looked at the large book that was supposedly bound in human skin.
“I don't like it much either, but knowing some of this stuff has helped in the past.” Buffy said as she looked up from her own book. “If nothing else, we can at least look at the pictures and known weaknesses.”
“Woah, wear gloves when handling that book Faith!” Ray said as he tossed a pair of cotton gloves at the girl. “That's a copy of the Necronomicon. No paper cuts near that thing. Ever!”
“Oh. Like in that Evil Dead movie?” Faith asked.
Ray winced. “Give a guy the cliffs notes and that is what happens.” He shook his head. “No the closest those movies ever got was the third one. But that all actually happened to your father. Minus the whole missing hand thing of course.”
“Huh. Cool.” Faith grinned.
“That was one of the many adventures we had due to New York's Public Library system.” Ray said with a laugh. “Now... I'll be quizzing you two on some of this later so pay attention.”
The two Slayers groaned and Ray just kept laughing.
“Come on, it'll be fun.” He told them.
“Why isn't Cordelia being quizzed?” Buffy whined.
“Cause she's napping right now.” Ray told her. “I swear she's almost Narcoleptic now.”
“Stupid catnaps.” Faith muttered.
“I will keep an eye out sir. If I do find her am I to be reinstated as the Field Watcher?” Giles asked. “I understand. I will let you know immediately if she crops up.” He said before hanging up the phone.
“What was that about?” Peter Venkman asked him.
“Why call forwarding is a good idea.” Giles said before he started to clean his glasses. “It seems the esteemed Watcher's Council hasn't a clue as to where your daughter is and want me to alert them the moment she finds me.”
“Right.” Peter said with a grin. “Aren't you on Alex's payroll?”
“That I am” Giles agreed. “They also are going to send out another field watcher once she's been found or another Slayer has been called. I'm not inclined to contact them until absolutely necessary. As in.. never.”
“They docked your pay didn't they?” Peter remembered.
“Oh you have no idea.” Giles told him. “Still... they know about Faith. They just can't find her. I'm sure that is due to Marduk's influence.”
“You save one Elder God from his literal eternal enemy.” Peter shrugged. “I'm not complaining that those discrediting bastards can't find her. The real question is what are we going to do when they do?”
“I think we need to discuss our options.” Giles said. “One of which is forcing her death temporarily to awaken the next Slayer, but that would damn another innocent child to an early death.”
“So that's out.” Peter said with a nod. “You're right. Let's call the boys together and round everyone up. This involves the whole family.”
“I'll make some notes on what the Council will likely do.” Giles promised.
The Firehouse, with lots and lots of Chinese Take out....
“So then they bankrupted the entire family.” Giles explained.
“Those poor people.” Cordelia said softly.
“Yeah. That was kind of the point.” Alex said with a nod. “Don't even get me started on what else they've done in the name of their 'organization'.
“They backed the current Mayor didn't they?” Egon asked with a sigh.
“A little bit.” Alex nodded. “I really don't like politicians. I'm almost tempted to do a little creative banking and make it look like our Mayor has been funding a prostitution ring.”
“They have multiple government connections.” Giles said as he pinched the bridge of his nose. “I initially tried to get away from them in my youth only to stray from the path enough to tie myself to a demon. After that... I was all in. I was young and stupid. Now I'm just stupid.”
“I've been told everyone is at some point.” Alex grinned. “Now... let's just keep it quiet about our latest family member. At the end of Summer.... We'll see. Hopefully if they do send us another Watcher to Sunnydale, it'll be a pompous ass we can work around.”
“Hey, my Watcher was great.” Faith spoke up. “Well until they broke her under torture anyways.”
“I assure you, that what you experienced was atypical.” Giles told her. “Before Buffy, the three prior Slayers lasted all of four months each, and they were trained by Watchers since birth.”
“Arrogance breeds stupidity.” Ray quoted.
“And we're all idiots here.” Alex grinned.
“Okay... short of bombing their headquarters, which is still a viable option... we leave them alone for now right?” Winston asked.
“Blowing the shit out of them is plan B then.” Faith agreed with a nod. “I can hang at Sunny D once Summer is over. The bastard and Grandpop are headed back to Japan after the wedding thing right?”
“We have responsibilities there.” Peter said with nod. “There are contracts I can't get out of and I technically am working for the Japanese government on some things. You are welcome to come with us if you want. I can put in a good word with the Japanese Embassy to smooth things along.”
“This is more than you just collecting their cursed artifacts and hosting a TV show isn't it?” Alex accused. “You've been... learning things without us!”
“You could say that.” Peter said with a nod. “Technically I've been an advisor to their own Ghostbuster group. You all remember how they had their own version of Ecto-1 the first time we went over there.”
“It was a sweet ride.” Winston grinned. “Go on.”
“Well, Let's just say a small portion of the discretionary budget goes to a team and I help that team when needed. Their own history is rich with demonic and supernatural interactions. They needed an outside consultant and they got me.” Peter shrugged. “It's a young team. Frankly I'm surprised you haven't formed one here yet Egon.”
“We may have to sooner or later.” Egon agreed. “I've already come up with a contingency to break in anyone that takes my class this upcoming semester.”
“Good thinking.” Ray said. “We should probably update all the equipment since we're all here too.”
“Well there is that new shielding and power boosters I've been tinkering with.” Egon said a he got a far off look in his eyes.
“Uh-oh... I think we'd better hurry this meeting along.” Buffy said. “I've seen that look before. He's getting creative.”
“I need my computer.” Egon muttered as his hands started twitching.
“Definitely seen this before.” Faith agreed as Egon's laptop floated into the room and onto the table.
“Though I tend to use a sketchpad.” Alex agreed. “I'm old fashioned that way.”
“Wait.” Faith said as she stared at the screen as Egon typed. “Invert those two numbers.”
Egon paused and did what Faith said. “Huh.” He said as he realized his error. “Good catch.”
“Thanks.... how did I?” She asked.
“Some things are intuitive. Don't question it just use it.” Alex told her. “Your dad has a similar talent. Intuitive Mathematicians are nothing to sneeze at.”
“He's right.” Peter nodded. “I can't always solve a written problem, but I can spot an error.”
“Sweet.” Faith grinned.
“Nice looking upgrades.” Winston said as he started to look over Egon's shoulder.
“Thanks.” Egon said as he adjusted his glasses. “Just have to finish this and then save.”
“And build it all of course.” Ray grinned.
“They do realize the wedding is tomorrow right?” Joyce whispered to Janine.
Janine snorted. “I can't think of a more fitting bachelor party. Come on, let's let them work. We have our own stuff to do, including slime-proofing my dress. Scotch Guard is nothing compared to the stuff Egon and Alex whipped up last year.”
“Good to hear.” Cordelia said with a grin. “Let's go. I know just the place to get our nails done.”
The Next Morning...
Egon blinked as he set down his Phillips Head screwdriver. He looked at his watch and then at the calendar on the wall.
“Oh shit! We're late!” He yelled, causing the others to wake up.
Alex blinked and sat up. He crossed his eyes and realized there was a yellow Post-It stuck to his forehead.
“They set all the clocks ahead an hour.” He read aloud. “Nicely done.” He grinned.
It was going to be one heck of a day....