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Magical Upchuck

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Summary: Xander is temporally turned into a girl by Willow. Before he turns back into himself he meets Chris Halliwell. The Chris from the future and Xander have sex. Now an very male Xander is pregnant with a child from a man that’s not even born yet. Slash

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
Charmed > Xander-CenteredMerKatFR151129,501811530,08624 Jan 0924 May 10No

Wishful

Title: Wishful

Author: MerKat
Fandom: BTVS/ Charmed
Summary: Xander is temporally turned into a girl by Willow. Before he turns back into himself he meets Chris Halliwell. The Chris from the future and Xander have sex. Now an very male Xander is pregnant with a child from a man that’s not even born yet. This idea is from a challenge I read but couldn’t find again. Don’t remember who gave the challenge but I thought it was a great idea.
Archive: Slash. Male on Male. Maybe some het too! Mpreg!
Rating: PG-13 . . . NC17 Just to give myself room from much later chapters.
Disclaimer: I own nothing except the craziness that spews out of my head. All characters belong to their respective owners. That means I own nothing and have zero money. . .
Author notes & Warnings: M/M fanfic. No Beta. Be afraid. My mood affects my writing.

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Xander glared.

Hard.

He glared with all the power and strength he could put into his eyes, he glared with anger so grim it made the slayer and the red witch nervous as all hell. He glared death at them hoping any minute that they would turn to stone and he could wash his hands of them! ‘They’re useless! What did I do to the universe to get stuck with them?’ Xander thought as ‘he’ tried to stare a hole into the back of Willow’s head. He was on his period and it was all Willow’s fault! ‘I’m a guy and should NEVER know what it feels like to have a period!! I . . . or should I be thinking of myself as a she? Technically I’m a she?’ Xander shook his head as he looked down at his radically different body. At the slender hairless swimmers legs, C cup breasts, and long wavy brown hair, at the delicate pale hands that replaced his brown callus covered construction hands. Xander shook his head just because his cock was magicked away doesn’t mean he’s not a boy and just because he has girl bits now doesn’t make him a girl! Does it? Then a horrible thought crossed Xander’s hormonal mind, ‘I’m an it?! An it, a sexually confused creature in human flesh?!’ Xander hissed through his/her teeth, he was now a fucking sexually confused IT, and there would have to be an army of psychiatrists to straighten his/her mind out! Xander glared at the girls and Giles again. ‘I’ll make them pay for my sessions!’

“Is the spell ready yet?” Xander growled.

Willow, Tara, and Buffy winced, not used to such a hostile Xander. Not used to it at all! For the past two days Xander had been in super umber bitch mode, and if anyone snapped back at hi . . .err her she would get teary eyed and her lip would wobble. It was like kicking a puppy. Yesterday Giles had yelled at Xander for having a fit because someone ate the last chocolate donut, instead of yelling like a hellcat Xander had started crying. Giles had felt so bad he went out and bought the pretty brunette a box full of the best chocolate donuts he could find.

“Almost.” Willow eeped.

“Good.” Xander grumbled as she slumped into her chair, legs spread and black skirt tightly bunched around her thighs. She knew she was sitting very un-lady like and knew her underwear was showing but didn’t care. She would be a guy soon anyway. Turning away from the girls setting up the spell on the floor, Xander stared hatefully at the book Willow had used to turn him into a girl. It’s pretty gold trim and blood red cover could not hide how evil it was. Xander wanted to burn it.

**
One week earlier
**

Entering the Magic Box like usual Xander set the sugary goodness down on the table for the others to find. He had a lot to do tonight and so little time to do it. He had his construction job to get back to; he just made head foremen and wanted to do a good job and to do a good job he needed to be on time for the first day at least! Looking around the empty Magic Box Xander wondered where his girls were off to?

Looking in the back Xander raised a brow at the sign. ‘No boys allowed’. It made him curious and he had to check it out. Really signs don’t work, not when they make one as curious as a cat, opening the door Xander gasped. Willow, Tara, Buffy, Anya, and a bunch of girls Xander didn’t know were in a semi-circle, half naked, around an erne of smoke. ‘What the . . .?’

“Hi! What’s going on?”

“XANDER! GET OUT!” Yelled Willow, her eyes wide as a gold trimmed book slipped from her hands. Xander being in the room would not have been a problem, Willow focused on Xander was. Willow was in the middle of a very mild female empowerment spell, a spell to focus female energy into one source. It was a booster spell nothing more . . . at least for women . . . for men it was much more.

Everyone gasped as Xander fell to the ground in a dead faint. A glow of magic starting to form around his body and slowly starting to absorb into his skin like a sponge taking in water.

“Willow! Stop the spell! I don’t want to have lesbian sex with Xander! I like his cock.” Said Anya as she stomped toward the fallen brunette.

“I-I don’t know how?!” Willow yelped as she watched Xander slowly start to change. He was becoming shorter, his hair growing longer and glossier, bones suddenly changing before her eyes.

Buffy frowned then looked from her chest to Xander. “Are Xander’s boobs bigger then mine?”

No one answered her.

**

Xander groaned as he woke up. He had a major headache and his body felt sore everywhere. “What demon hit me?” Asked Xander but then was stunned at the sound of his voice, it was too soft and clear.

“That would be Willow. She turned you into a girl and was too cocky to find a reverse spell to change you back. Right now we’re researching for a cure because I can’t have lesbian sex with you Xander. I have a plan and my first orgasm with a woman will be with that hot chick from Bay watch. The one with the big breasts.” Said Anya, her face floating in front of Xander’s.

“Oh.” Xander said in shock. Brain still on the fritz from hearing the sweet and clear bell like voice coming from his own throat. He could be a singer now . . . Yippy.

Anya looked down at Xander’s changed chest. “Though you do have very big breasts . . .”

Opening and closing his mouth Xander crossed his arms over his chest, hiding his swollen chest since his tank top wasn’t doing a good job. Xander only had one thing on his mind really, one question he wanted answered now. “When are they going to change me back?!” Xander squeaked out and winced at his own voice, he was sure that squeak could make dogs yelp in pain.

Willow bit at her lip as she stepped forward toward female Xander. “I’m sorry.”

“Change me back! I need to be at the site in . . .” Xander looked at his watch and tried to ignore how the leather strap flopped around on his slender wrist. “Three minutes! Oh shit! I need to be at work, Willow! Change me back!”

Willow’s green eyes widened as the pretty girl before her yelled and waved her hands about. “Did I mention I was sorry?! Cause I am! Really sorry that I forgot to tell you I was doing a non-man friendly spell?! I thought I did! Did you check your answering machine? Sorry again! Um here, I made cookies!”

Xander blinked his/her big brown eyes nearly crossing them so he/she could look clearly at the double chip cookies under his/her nose. Panic lightened Xander’s eyes. “Willow . . . Why are you given me ‘I’m real sorry I fucked up and can’t fix it cookies’?”

Willow simpered. “I can’t change you back Xander . . .”


“WHAT?!!!”

**
Today
**

Xander sniffed and wrinkled her nose at the evil red and gold book. She shifted her body hating the feel of the skirt on her legs and the under wire of the bra digging into her ribs. Xander did not like bras, they were evil contraptions invented by demons, they had to be. “Is the damn spell ready yet?”

“Almost Xan! Just hold your horses!” Buffy glared, annoyed at Xander’s attitude and the fact that she was wearing Buffy’s favorite leather skirt.

Xander’s head snapped forward and she let out an angry hiss of breath. “Hold your own horses Buffy! You wouldn’t be too happy if your bits and pieces fell off! You’d be crying your head off if Willow spelled your tits away!”

Willow ducked her head, not wanting to catch Xander attention. The fem-spell not only changed Xander physically, it gave him/her power to move things with her mind and the ability to cast spells. Xander could now DO things Willow only dreamed of. The fem-spell was supposed to focus female energy and help amplify all of the girls best traits. Like a luck spell. It was supposed to be just a fun bonding spell for Willow and her wicca friends. She only hoped the reversal spell worked, Xander was scary as a girl. And being the caster of the original spell she was the only one that could change him back. With the last drawing finished Willow stood up and cautiously approached the temperamental brunette. “We’re ready Xan.”

“About time!” Xander jumped up out of her chair. “I’m starting to think of myself as a girl more then a guy! When I went to the Bronze last night I ordered a Sex-on-the-beach and instead of checking out hot girls I was looking for cute guys! Guys! And I danced with one and let him feel me up! Can you believe that?!”

“Just stand in the middle of the rune Xander and all this will be done with.” Giles sighed as he pinched the bridge of his nose.

Xander did as asked and listened carefully as Willow started her spell. Her voice started out soft and Xander could feel the magic building and shifting. ‘This better work.’ As a wave of power rushed over him/her Xander gasped and collapsed to the ground.

**

Groaning Xander opened gritty eyes and spoke softly since he/she had a major headache. “Did the spell work?”

“Yes and no.” Said Giles hesitantly.

“Yes and no?” Xander blinked not liking the answer.

“The spell did take but is on a time delay . . .” Giles nervously said as he helped Xander off the couch.

“Great! Just fucking great! How long?” Xander asked as she straightened her clothes.

“A month from today. The magic Willow used was subtle, it needs to absorb into your body.”

“And it will take a month!” Asked the angry dark haired girl as she got off the couch she had been laying on. “A month!”

Giles nodded.

Xander’s pretty face twisted into a grimace. “And where is Willow now?”

Cleaning his glasses Giles sighed. “I believe she said she was going to go home and start baking chocolate oatmeal cookies. Willow and Tara left immediately after they found out why the spell didn’t change you back. The spell did work Xander . . . It will just take time.”

“Time! Time! Giles really? I lost my job because of this! I’m job-less and Anya-less! Oh and did I not mention I’m homeless!”

Giles sighed, he could understand Xander being so upset, and Giles himself would not have liked experiencing life from the other side. Giles shuddered at the thought. “You can continue staying in my home Xander . . . And I’m sure your boss would rehire you . . . as for Anya . . .” Giles shrugged.

“I need to get out of here.” Xander sighed as she brushed her hands through her thick mane of hair.

“My apartment?” Giles raised a brow. “Am I such a bad flat mate?”

Xander smiled. “No G-man you’re not. I meant Sunnydale. I think I’ll use all that money I got from construction and take some TLC time for myself. Pamper myself, I deserve it after-all this.”

**
San Francisco
**

Chris sighed. His job as the Charmed one’s whitelighter was not going well. Piper, his mother, didn’t trust him. Phoebe and Paige were now bugging him constantly to tell the oldest sister who he was. Chris narrowed his blue eyes. ‘Not like I wanted any of them to know.’

Downing his drink Chris ordered himself another. He needed to unwind, he wanted to have some fun for once! Scoping the place Chris started searching for the prettiest girl around. He found her dancing with two guys and boy was she hot. Long brown hair down to her shoulder, the curly dark waves caressing her bare back. Slender hips moving to the beet of the music, round apple shaped bottom catching every eye in the club. The girl turned around and Chris had to gasp. ‘She has the face of an angel.’ Chris couldn’t stop staring into her doe brown eyes, he was lost to her. Walking up to the girl Chris boldly placed his hands on her hips. “Want to dance?”

The girl raised an amused brow. “Since I’m already dancing . . . yeah why not!”

Chris wanted to hit himself but all he did was smile like a goof. “I’m Chris?”

The girl in the tight black dress smiled and took Chris’ breath away. “Alexandra. Please to meet you Chris. Buy me a drink.” She ordered and headed for the bar. Chris followed like a lovesick pup, he would sell his soul just to see that smile again, even thought her ordering him about was cute.

“What would you like?” Chris asked Alexandra as he sat down beside her.

“I’d like a shot.”

“What kind?” Chris raised a brow, the girl before him didn’t look the type to drink hard stuff.

“Vodka straight up and then a bottle of champagne.” Alexandra whispered into Chris’ ear as she played with his hair.

“A bottle?”

“Yeah, need to celebrate this day in style baby!” She laughed.

“Ok, but what we celebrating?”

Alexandra gave Chris a seductive look. “You . . . me . . . and a bed.”

Chris ordered those drinks and the bottle of champagne quick, and wished furiously that he could just forget duty and orb himself and Alexandra to the nearest motel. He was hard as a rock already and he had a sneaking suspicion that the brown hair beauty already knew that.

**

Xander smiled sweetly at the handsome guy next to her. Chris would make tonight special for her. After all she was at the moment a healthy young female and Xander was tired of fighting her own mind. Her body had needs and she was just as curious to find out what they are. Plus she had been partying for a while. ‘Oh man I’m sooooo drunk I’ll be regretting this in the morning.’ Xander giggled when Chris circled a possessive arm around her middle.

Using her Faith-like attitude Xander brushed her body against Chris’. “Lets go and have some fun.”

And fun she had.


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Review please. If ya find any big mistakes please tell me. Thanks!
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