Disclaimer: I own nothing. All Buffy the Vampire Slayer characters belong to their original owners.
Every inhabitant of the Cleveland Slayers House currently in the rec room was ready for this despairing shriek from on high, as they all stuck their fingers into their ears, also drowning out the applause coming from the crowd shown on the big-screen television on the room wall.
Also expected was the thunderous crash coming from upstairs as another television was thrown out through a bedroom window.
Hands came down from heads, as pockets were reached into and money redistributed as bets were settled. This came to a sudden halt, as the entire building shook to furious stomping and a rush of someone’s feet to the outside, accompanied by the crash of several doors being kicked to splinters along the way. As the debris from the front door rattled onto the entranceway, the new results forced recent winners to hand back their money, or pass it along to other winners of the latest outcome.
In the rec room, holding his cellphone, Xander Harris touched a button to make a call. “Yo, Andrew. Yeah, she handled it like we expected, and she’s taking the west route. You got everything ready? The tranquilizer guns, sleeping gas, tasers, nets? Okay, when you bring her back, we’ll have the chains to wrap around her until she cools down.”
“Which might not be for a while,” pointed out a sniggering Dawn at Xander’s side, happily counting her cash. “She’s gonna be on all the talk shows, for one, setting Buffy off.”
Willow came back into the rec room, shaking her head from seeing what damage the Slayer had done in her flat-out sprint in leaving the house. The redhead disbelievingly asked, “She’s really going to run all the way to Los Angeles?”
“Not if Andrew and the rest of the baby Slayers do their job,” replied Xander as he stuck his cellphone back into his pocket.
Dawn wasn’t paying all that much attention to him. Instead, she was watching with fascination at the beautiful woman in a stunning gown making her way up to the podium. The younger Summers sister’s face brightened at a sudden thought, as she eagerly asked, “Do you think she’ll actually mention our names?”
Xander snorted. “Are you kidding? Even in Sunnydale, we never got to the level of ‘the little people’.”
The others crowded into the rec room, the trainee Watchers and baby Slayers, all watched as every one of the former residents of the now-destroyed California town glumly nodded in agreement.
Then, everyone’s attention returned to the television screen, as Cordelia Chase finally reached the podium and beamingly accepted her Academy Award from Hugh Jackman, giving him an air kiss, as every female in the Cleveland house sighed in jealousy. Including Willow, who received an incredulous look from her best friend since kindergarten.
“What?” shrugged the Red Witch at Xander. “I’m gay, not dead.”
Rolling his remaining eye, Xander looked again at the television, as his former girlfriend now turned to face hundreds of millions of viewers, joyously holding up her Oscar for her role as Buffy Summers in ‘The Sunnydale Story.’ Tossing back her still-dyed blonde hair that now had millions of imitators, Cordelia Chase began, “I’d like to thank…..”
Further disclaimer: I also own nothing concerning the Oscars and the Academy Awards. Man, those people are vicious!