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Danger!

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Summary: YAHF. Xander wins a special costume.

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
Movies > Surprise CrossoverNommaFR714963253,46226 Feb 0926 Feb 09Yes
AN: I know, I know. I'm supposed to be working on Los Angeles: Year One. I'm doing that as well, but this latched onto my brain and just WOULD NOT let go! *sigh* Ah, well. Enjoy the fic!

AN2: Anyone who can guess what Xander's dressed as before the end, I bow to you as Sci-Fi gods, or something. Either that, or I suck at keeping things a surprise.



Danger!

As Xander walked through the doors of Ethan’s Costume Shop, an alarm blared. Well, not an alarm, exactly. More like whistles and bells.

Seemingly out of nowhere, a man appeared at Xander’s side. “Congratulations, young man. You’re the one thousandth customer to walk through that door.”

Xander jumped in surprise, then blinked as the man’s words sunk in. “Whoa. Really? Uh… What do I get?”

“You get the best costume in my store, should you want it. My name is Ethan Rayne, and I own this establishment. Come with me, it’s in the back.”

Xander frowned as Ethan walked away, but followed anyway. Something about the guy made Xander’s skin crawl…

When they got to the back, however, Xander forgot all about being creeped out. His eyes bugged out, and his jaw hit the floor hard enough to penetrate the Earth’s crust.

Ethan smiled. “Yes. I thought you might be impressed.”

“Is that- Are those- Gah! Do those treads actually work?!

“In point of fact, they do. If you’ll just give me your address, I’ll have it delivered.”

Nodding dumbly, Xander gave the man all the information. As he walked back out into the main store, he barely registered Buffy looking at some dress, and Willow buying her usual ghost costume. The girls, meanwhile, seemed to notice his stupor.

“Hey, Xand. Are you okay?” Buffy asked.

He nodded. “Uh huh.”

“Did you get a costume?” Willow asked, looking a bit concerned.

“Oh, boy did I ever…” He muttered. Shaking himself, he nodded. “Yeah. I did. It’s being delivered to my house. Um… I’ll meet you guys at the school, okay?” He ran out of the store.

The Slayer and her redheaded friend shared a concerned look. What had that been about?

***
The Streets Of Sunnydale, Seconds After The Spell Was Cast

The form of Xander Harris shuddered, and his mind became blank. An HUD filled his vision.

STATUS: ONLINE.

PRIMARY FUNCTIONS: PROTECT WILLOW ROSENBERG.

PROTECT BUFFY SUMMERS.

PROTECT JOYCE SUMMERS.

PROTECT SUNNYDALE.

SECONDARY FUNCTIONS: KEEP DEADBOY’S PAWS OFF OF BUFFY SUMMERS.

DESTROY IF NECESSARY.

ENSURE UNIT’S SURVIVAL.

To his right, a young woman in… strange clothing ran up to him. Facial recognition software identified her as Willow Rosenberg.

“Xander! Are you okay?!” Her expression was one of great terror. “You are still Xander, right?”

“THIS UNIT IS DESIGNATED AS XANDER HARRIS.” A deep voice confirmed.

“Oh… Alright. Um, are you okay?”

“SELF DIAGNOSTIC SHOWS UNIT IS OPERATING AT 98% EFFICIENCY.”

“That’s good, I guess… Listen, we have to find Buffy.”

“COMMAND CONFIRMED. LOCATE BUFFY SUMMERS.” A small demon appeared behind Willow. Xander’s right-side appendage extended, sending a blast of energy at it.

“Hey! Don’t do that! They’re just kids!”

“WEAPONS ARE SET TO STUN.”

“Oh. Alright. Just… Warn me next time.”

“COMMAND CONFIRMED.”

More demons appeared, causing Xander to begin firing quickly.

“DANGER, WILL ROSENBERG! DANGER!”



Disclaimer: I own nothing. Joss owns BTVS. The folks at New Line Cinema own the Lost in Space movie.

The End

You have reached the end of "Danger!". This story is complete.

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