The Sword and the Cap
Disclaimer: Characters and concepts belong to their owners who I'm too lazy to list.
[Censored by the Reich Ministry of Public Enlightenment and Propaganda]: I'm insane. BtVS crossovers with Drakan (video game), Mighty Max, Pinky and the Brain, Knight Rider, Scooby Doo, Hercules, and that's what I can remember without actually rereading the story.
The phone was ringing.
It took Rupert Giles, ex-Watcher, to identify the sound.
Afterall, it wasn't everyday that his phone rang. None of
the children (Yes, they were all young enough to be his
offspring, so he'll call them what he liked even though
they all graduated from high school!) ever called him. If
they wanted to talk to Giles, they usually dropped by in
person instead of phoning. Would it have been so
difficult for them to call him?
Of course, getting called at threeish in the morning
wasn't exactly what he had in mind.
Now that Giles thought about it, he couldn't quite recall
his own phone number. When was the last time he had
actually given the number out to somebody. Oh yes, now he
recalled. It was...
Ye gods! Had it really been four years? And to the
Council no less, not that they ever used it the hidebound
But enough griping. Time to answer the phone.
"Giles?" came a familiar voice.
"Ah, hello, Angel," Giles greeted cordially, but not with
too much enthusiasm. It wouldn't do to express how empty
his life was lately, deranged Slayer and her demonic
roomate aside. "What can I do for you?" Maybe a touch of
levity would be appropriate. "Is the apocalypse nigh?"
There was a short pause on Angel's end then, "How did you
Boredom was suddenly looking good.
Waking up late was nice. Waking up late with Kathy gone
back to whatever hell she came from was even better.
Especially considering the late patrol with absolutely
And having Willow as her roomie was actually turning out
to be a Good Thing despite some initial Kathy flashbacks.
With a quick scan of her room, Buffy saw that Willow was
gone, probably to breakfast. It was Saturday and having
no classes today, Buffy considered just lazing about in
On the other hand, if she got up in time before the
cafeteria closed, she might run into Parker. Now that
would be a good thing, right?
Buffy was out of the shower and mostly dressed when
Willow walked in. In her hand was a small wire cage with
two white furry somethings in them.
"Morning, Buffy," Willow said, happy as always.
"Hey, Will," Buffy replied as she decided which shoes
would look best with what she was wearing. "Whatcha got
"I got some friends for Amy," Willow told her. Setting
the cage on her desk, Willow took the two furballs out.
"I was thinking that she might be getting kind of lonely,
being by herself and all. Also, a cousin of mine was
just convicted of animal abuse, and her pets needed a new
home. I got these mice."
"Animal abuse?" It was hard for Buffy to imagine anyone
related to Willow being deliberately malicious. Except
maybe for Willow's evil twin.
"Well, she kinda smothered them with love. Literally.
Don't ask," Willow said sheepishly. She put the two white
mice in Amy's cage. "Here you go, Amy, some new friends!"
Having selected her shoes, Buffy examined the two mice.
They seemed oddly deformed. "Willow, what's wrong with
those, two?" she asked concerned.
"Oh, don't worry about it, Buffy," Willow assured her.
"Seems before my cousin had them, they used to belong to
a now defunct biolab. Seems they were incompetant or
something. Anyway, the mice are kinda genetic leftovers."
"They're not gonna go all Hellmouthy on us and try to
destroy the world are they?" Buffy said as she and Willow
"Oh no, they're..." The door shut then, cutting off the
remaining conversation from the mice. And the dorm room
was utterly silent for the moment. Then someone spoke.
"Pinky, are you pondering what I'm pondering?"
"I think so, Brain. Amy IS a babe, isn't she?"
Late breakfast in the campus cafeteria had it's plusses
and minuses. On the plus side, the lines were short
because most of the students who ate there already had.
On the minus side, the food selection was...limited. For
Max, it was a toss up on which was better.
On the other hand, arriving right on the heels of two
pretty girls was a definite plus. Maybe he could even get
a date out of this.
"Y'know, maybe we should have gone to a fast food place,"
the blonde was saying to her red headed companion. "I
mean, this stuff has been sitting out here so long, it's
starting to look like some of the stuff we got in high
"Hey, maybe there's even rat poison in it," the red head
said with a weird enthusiasm.
The blonde just stared back. When the red head started
making incoherent protests, Max thought it was a good
time to step in.
"I think I can guarantee that there's no rat poison in
the food," Max interupted. He gestured vaguely at the
less than crowded cafeteria. "Unless everybody here is
immune that is."
The two girls turned to face him. Yes, Max thought,
definitely better looking from the front. The blonde
quirked a smile. "Probably not," she said to him. "You
must be M. Funny, you don't look like the head of British
"What, this?" Max said looking down at the huge red
letter M monogrammed on his T-shirt. "Believe it or not,
my mom had these sewn on all my clothes while I wasn't
looking. By the way, I'm Max Strong."
"Buffy Summers," the blonde said.
"Willow Rosenberg," the red head followed.
"Nice to meet you," Max said. This was going well. "Say,
either of you wouldn't happen to be free tonight, would
Buffy and Willow glanced at each other in amusement. Uh
oh, Max knew that look. "Actually, I already have a
date," Willow said apollogetically.
"And while I'm not dating someone per se," Buffy put in,
"I am doing datelike things with someone tonight unless
something comes up."
"Oh, that's all right," Max said, hiding his
disappointment. "Plenty of other girls in Sunnydale U.
Hey maybe one of them will like an ex-superhero."
"Ex-superhero?" Buffy asked, eyebrows raised.
"Well, yeah." Sotto-voice, Max told them, "I used to be a
superhero. Ran around saving the world and all before I
retired. Behold the source of my power!" He whipped out a
red baseball cap with a monogrammed M on it. "Pitiful,
huh? Well, looks like we've been talking too long 'cause
the cafeteria line's just closed. Be seein' you."
With that, he turned and walked away in search of
breakfast and maybe a date.
He didn't hear Buffy mutter under her breath, "At least
some of us get to retire."
Sleep was a good thing. Finding a nice secluded spot to
get some sleep proved to be a problem in this world, Rynn
found. Especially considering that there just weren't
that many places to hide a twenty foot dragon in this
For one thing, even after flying for several leagues,
Rynn and Arohk could still see houses everywhere. Los
Angeles seemed to go on forever, broken up only by rows
of hills that were themselves topped with houses and
Finally, the hills started becoming more common than the
houses. Though still too near to human habitation for her
liking, Rynn had Arohk set down in a semi secluded glade
where they could get some rest.
Rynn didn't want to press on during the day. Last night
was hardly any rest and Rynn wanted to be rested when
she would open the local rift. There was no telling what
was on the other side. Also, she wanted to minimize the
risk of being spotted by the roaring death birds that had
so handily destroyed two squadrons of Blade Dragons. They
might have mistook Arohk as one.
Of course, they could have stayed in Angel's warehouse,
but the Dark Union had agents in this world. Both Rynn
and Arohk agreed that they did not want to be ambushed
Leaning back against Arohk's hide, Rynn let herself drift
off into slumber. Maybe her dreams wouldn't bother her
so much now...
"Hey, yon dragon!" a high pitched voice shouted,
startling Rynn and Arohk out of their half-sleep. "Unhand
the fair maiden and cower before the might of Sir Calvin
Arohk caught sight of the intruder first as Rynn was
scrambling to her feet. "I believe the humans of this
world have a saying appropriate to this situation, Rynn,"
the dragon told his rider. "You've got to be kidding me."
It was a boy, maybe no more than four or five years old.
He was straw haired and cute looking. In one hand he
brandished a toy sword. In the other, he held a stuffed
doll of some kind.
"Release the maiden, foul beast!" Sir Calvin insisted.
"I beg your pardon?" Arokh said, mystified by the young
Rynn was quicker to catch on. "Oh, brave Knight, thank
goodness you've come!" she exclaimed in the most
simpering voice she could manage.
Although he showed no outward signs, Rynn could feel
Arohk's total and complete confusion. Poor boy, Rynn
thought, he probably thinks the whole universe had gone
"Fear not, milady," Sir Calvin replied. "I shall rescue
you from this fearsome dragon!"
"Oh, dear sir, you misunderstand me," Rynn went on,
"Though the dragon is fearsome," confused pride from
Arohk, "he is my friend and guardian."
"Huh?" Sir Calvin said brilliantly.
"My sentiments exactly," Arohk rumbled.
"Indeed. Sir Calvin, we are pursued my foes great and
many," Rynn continued.
"I will protect you, lady!" the boy exclaimed.
"Oh, we couldn't impose, but..." Rynn trailed off
"But?" Sir Calvin and Arohk said simultaneously.
"My guardian and I need to sleep and recover our
strength," Rynn explained. "Could you be so kind as to
stand watch over us while we slumber?"
It took Sir Calvin a minute to decipher what Rynn had
said. Then he spent the next five arguing with his doll,
"Lady! I, Sir Calvin, and my squire, Hobbes, will gladly
stand guard while you sleep. Only..."
"Can you tell us a story?"
"Once, long ago in an age long past, the Order of the
Flame warded all the world from evil. Good Dragons and
their knightly riders..."
Humans were strange, Arohk mused as he settled down.
"...the betrayer Navaros who destroyed the Order. But its
last knight and dragon shattered the Dark Union, exiling
They were constantly fretting to and fro, trying to
accomplish what they could in their short lives. But in
their haste, their lives become less than direct, a long
winding road that more often than not lead nowhere.
"...centuries. Then the Dark Union rose again, and a
young peasant girl rose to defy them. Bonding herself to
the last dragon..."
No, he wasn't being completely fair. Sometimes, a human's
life would take him or her far, Such lives accomplished
wonders to behold.
"...destroying Navaros, the girl and dragon returned home
Arohk's current rider was one of those. He wouldn't want
it to be any other way.
"Did the girl ever rescue her brother?" Sir Calvin asked.
Rynn sighed sadly. "Yes she did," Rynn lied.
The Death Mage floated upon a hilltop overlooking the
town. By this world's standards, it was small and
unassuming. But the Death Mage could feel the power of a
Rift singing in the air.
Having spied on the peasant wench and her dragon planning
to go to the nearest Rift, the Death Mage had raced to
the nearest one he could detect. Knowing that dragon and
rider were coming here, he would gather allies to ambush
them. While he formulated his plans, one nagging question
echoed in the back of his mind.
What fool builds a town right on top of a Rift?
To be continued...