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Summary: While waiting in a London bar to meet with a new slayer, Giles encounters an odd woman who seems frighteningly familiar... A rare (from what I've seen) cross with Coupling

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
Television > CouplingIgnotusFR1398,0000196,07319 Mar 0920 Mar 10Yes

Positively Delicious

Notes & Disclaimers: Another round of the Scooby's, as well as Jane and the girls, with the lovely addition of Drusilla. All other information and disclaimers are at the beginning of the story.



Xander walked into the London headquarters of Watchers Council International two days after the incident that caused him so much internal worry. His days off were now at an end and he was ready to return to work and forget about that one mention of a ‘Drusilla’ that couldn’t possibly be the one his thoughts had immediately turned to at the time. Nope. Not a chance in Hell.

Which—he should have realised—meant that it would, of course, be her.

It was as he was entering Giles’ office that these things started to make themselves known to Xander.

The first thing he realised was this: with the luck of the Scooby’s, it couldn’t be anyone other than Drusilla, the Mad Vampiress.

Second: how many other Drusilla’s could there be who liked to threaten people with rather creative and descriptive forms of fatal violence.

The third thing that made him realise what he overheard was referring to their Drusilla was the fact that Buffy, Faith, and Giles were all discussing Drusilla and her ‘niece’ when he entered the office.

“Hello, Xander,” Giles greeted as Buffy and Faith waved. “We were just going over a… situation, that has arisen over the past few nights.”

Xander sighed. “Does it have anything to do with Drusilla?”

Giles blinked. “How did you…? Oh, you heard us talking then.”

“Nope,” Xander replied. “I overheard something in a bar a couple nights ago that was kinda unsettling but I ignored it because, hey, Drusilla couldn’t be that rare a name.”

“Only you, Xander.” Faith shook her head in exasperation that was belied by the grin on her face.

“What, exactly, did you overhear?” Giles asked.

Xander told them all that he remembered from the conversation.

“It’s weird,” Buffy said after he finished telling his tale, “this all seems so like Drusilla, but at the same time, it seems so much unlike her.”

“I agree. We really can’t know for sure what is going on unless we confront her.”

“Should we?” Faith asked. “Maybe we should just sit back and watch what happens. From what I’ve overheard, she hasn’t done anything ‘evil’. Unless you consider threatening Jane’s ex-boyfriend with evisceration if he hurt her as evil, but come on, Buffy and I’ve threatened Dawn’s potential boyfriends with more.”

“She kind of has a point,” Xander admitted reluctantly.

“I know she does, yet I still can’t help but feel greatly unsettled by all this,” Giles said.

“Me too. I just want to get all this over with,” Buffy replied. “I say we confront her, question her, then introduce her to a nice pointy bit of wood.”

The others readily agreed.

* * * * *

Drusilla drifted into the bar and looked around. There were plenty of wonderful bodies here to choose from if she got a little peckish. Just a quick trip to the alley outside and that would be it. But she had made she to grab a bite to eat before coming, wanting to have plenty of time with Jane and her friends.

She quickly spotted her niece at a table near the back shared by two blonde women. Grinning, she wafted (as that was really the only way to describe how she moved) to the back and stood between and just behind the two blonde women, whose backs were to her.

Jane noticed her immediately and grinned up at her. The two noticing where her attention had gone, quickly looked behind them to see Drusilla.

Susan eyes widened as she took in the woman and realised Steve was right; Drusilla did look more like a sister than an aunt.

“Aunt Drusilla! Come, sit down, do you want anything to drink?” Jane asked, then smirked, “Besides the obvious?”

The other two women were somewhat confused by the comment but let it go as Drusilla went around to the other side of the table and sat next to Jane. “No, thank you. I’m quite fine at the moment.”

“If you don’t mind me saying Drusilla, you look more like a sister to Jane than an aunt,” Susan commented.

“We get that a lot actually.” Drusilla smiled and looked Susan up and down. “And if you don’t mind me saying; you look positively delicious.”

Susan’s eyes widened momentarily while beside her, Sally muttered something about there being ‘another one’.

Jane rolled her eyes and lightly swatted Drusilla’s arm.

“No biting,” she said.

Drusilla pouted and looked at Jane with wide doe-eyes. “Just a little, later?”

Jane sighed at the look from her aunt. “Only if she agrees.”

Drusilla beamed and looked to Susan with a hopeful expression. Though Sally thought Drusilla odd so far, she couldn’t help but a feel a little put out when Susan got the—admittedly odd—favourable comment on her appearance.

As if Drusilla sensed her thoughts, she turned to Sally and tilted her head. “If I said you have a lovely bottom, would that be enough?”

Sally’s eyes widened and she self-consciously wriggled in her seat. She was trying to think up a response but her attention was grabbed by the appearance of three people walking up behind Drusilla. She wouldn’t have paid them any thought before, but one of the two women with the older man was one Jane encountered the other night that she and Susan had caught a glimpse of when returning to the table.

Jane turned to see what Sally was staring at and she smiled when she saw the man.

“That’s him!” she said excitedly to Drusilla. “That’s the older man I mentioned on the phone that mistook me for you!”

Drusilla gave an unsettling smile to the table and turned fluidly in her chair to watch them approach.

The three people paused for a moment when they saw Drusilla had noticed them but continued on. The older gentlemen stopped first and the two women stood in front of and on either side of Drusilla which left her essentially boxed in.

“Hello Drusilla,” the blond girl said coldly.
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