Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Batman belongs to DC and Buffy and the gang belong to Joss Whedon. Ranma 1/2 belongs to Rumiko Takahashi.
The plane had landed at Tokyo airport a few hours ago. Xander was absolutely sure of one thing. They were lost! 'Damn GPS! Piece of crap technology! Where the hell are we?' he fumed silently.
He felt a swat to the back of the head. He turned and looked at the swat-y. "Why?" he asked in a low menacing voice.
"Knock of the Bruce voice. And 'cause, you're pulling an Angel." Cass-y-D accused.
"Cass-y-Dawn Marie Summers Cane! That is so mean. Take that back." Xander shouted.
"Nu uh. You know the rules. You brood, you pay the price." Cass-y-D lectured with a waved finger.
"Hey. Since when did you turn into your mom?" Xander shot back. 'Oh she is so not getting away with this.' he thought.
"What! You meanie! you take that back! I'm so not mom." she shouted back, hands on hips. If looks could kill? Xander would have dropped dead in an instant from her glare.
"I'm not the one with the waving finger. If you wave it, be prepared to deal with the consequences young missy." Xander told her with a smug smirk. 'Ha! I'm so the man.' he thought.
Cass-y-D at first gave him the look. But then she pulled out the ultimate dirty girl trick in the universe. Her eyes started to tear up. She let out a couple of silent whimpers with a slight full body shudder.
OH GOD NO. She's going straight for the big guns. Oh no not the water works. Please lord, stop her. I'll be good. Whatever you ask lord. I'm yours forever and ever But for the love of you stop her.' he begged, he pleaded and prayed silently for God to deliver him from his ultimate weakness. One of his girls was crying and somehow he was the cause. He was so gonna pay for this.
"Please Cass-y-Dawnmeister." he pleaded.
A single tear leaked from her left eye. It slowly made its way down her red, emotion flushed cheek. A single sob escaped. She bravely pulled herself together and stopped any further sobs from escaping.
"Knock off the drama and the water works Cass-y-D." Barbara said adding a telekinetic swat to emphasize her point.
"Hey!" protested Cass-y-D. "He was being mean to me. Tell him to stop it." she complained.
Barbara gave her a look that said 'Uh hn, tell me another one.'
Cass-y-D did the smart thing and decided to retreat. She would get him later.
Barbara went back her computer, this place was a maze. There was so much construction going on, she was sure that half of the streets must have been changed. She wondered why there was so much construction going on in the first place. There were no reported disasters, or anything in the area for that matter.
"Wow, you're really good at that." Dee said quietly. "Would you teach me?" she asked in a hushed voice.
"You want me to teach you?" Cass-y-D said surprised.
Dee nodded. "You're the best I ever saw. It would be an Honor to learn from a master like you."
"Wow. I really faltered. You're on. I've never had a disciple before." she said getting excited. "Come on. I'm going to teach you everything I know." she promised.
For Xander, who's hearing was sharp enough to catch the conversation over all the construction racket, that was the worst news ever. Now he would have to deal with two manipulating, under age teens of the female persuasion.
His stomach growled. 'Oh great. Now I'm hungry. Stupid airline food! First class my ass! I know this beast well. It must be fed. And like Now!'
"Um, Babs..." Xander said.
"I heard." Barbara said pointing at a nearby dinner.
"You're like the best finance ever." he said.
Inside the Diner a pretty waitress took their order. Xander was concentrating on controlling his stomach so hard, he totally ignored her. This pleased the girls, but not the waitress.
She seated them at a table for four. They were the only ones in the place. It was early afternoon, but after the lunch crowd had already left.
The waitress was surly, but with the girls she was extra nice. 'Oh well, at least I don't have to worry about her being of the demonic or other category. She's got to be fully human, but what's up with the crazy hair.'
She left to get their order. The only other person in the room was the buss-boy, he was busy cleaning the tables. He also had a smile on his face for some reason. 'At least someone's happy.' he looked down at the menu, studied it for a minute, then asked. "What did you order?" he asked Barbara.
"I kept it simple. We got eight bowls of the house special." Barbara answered. She studied the menu further. She liked what it had. Maybe if she was still hungry she would try some of the more exotic dishes.
"Thank you. Thank you. You're like the best. If I didn't know better I would guess that read a book, or something that said the best way to control a man would be through his stomach. But like I said I know better. There's no one like you..." Xander babbled.
"Enough already, stop with the begging, jeez, I'll get you another bowl." she said stopping the non stop babble." she didn't know who perfected the babble attack, but she had a suspicion that it was Willow. He was quick enough to pick up the tactic and use it when he wanted something really badly, like food.
Cass-y-D and Dee had their heads together, whispering and giggling. She could guess about what. They kept sneaking peaks and giggling at Xander, who sat fuming, she knew that was mostly due to his unbelievable appetite. Dear god, but that man could eat.
She had a healthy appetite herself nowadays, but no where near what he could put away. She was burning everything she ate. It was great. All you can eat cookie ice cream with a side of cheese cake. Okay, the whole cheesecake. The next morning, there wasn't any weight gain. She burned it all while sleeping. Just for that alone he deserved another bowl.
Soon enough the waitress came back, with all eight bowls balanced with ease. She threw them on the table without spilling a drop, except for Xander's which had a slight splash. Enough to be annoying, but not enough to complain about.
For Xander the food was a 'WOW.', but the service sucked. The girl had it in for him. He didn't do anything to deserve this kind of service, but again the food was freakin' 'WOW.'
After the third bowl his beast was satisfied. He was in an ambivalent mood. Good food, good company, but bad service. He could live with that. Chances are he would never see this particular waitress again. So he let it go. Otherwise, he would have complained to the management. He also noticed the way the waitress treated the buss-boy.
They were waiting for desert when the buss-boy came by. He asked if they needed anything else. Napkins, water or whatever. He nice to everyone and treated Xander fairly. He gave good service. That changed Xander's mood a little.
Xander had noticed that the waitress had ordered the guy around in Chinese, so when he spoke to him he used the same language. "A man I wanna thank you for the service." he handed him a very large tip. "Too bad you weren't the waiter. You rock." Xander overdid the flattery, but after the way the waitress had treated them both, he felt that the guy could use the boost.
"Thank you." the buss-boy said for the complement and for the huge tip. "But I have to ask you to apologize about insulting my Shampoo." he added firmly.
"Man you were great, but she was a menace." Xander told him.
"Again I thank you, but Shampoo is the love of my life. I can't let you insult her like that. You must apologize." he said.
"I understand. Love makes you do strange things." Xander said with a sigh.
"I see you do understand." he said reasonably. "I regret the beating I must administer then if you do not apologize."
Xander was curious. For a buss-boy he was pretty cocky. He looked at the guy closely. He could tell that he was serious about this, one could say committed.
"I do apologize if I insulted you, but I will not apologize about how she treated me. There was no reason for it." Xander tried to resolve this without fighting the guy. He could understand wanting to defend his girl, but he didn't think that in this case that it was warranted.
"Did you see how she acted or not?" Xander tried a different approach.
"I did. I do not condone how my Shampoo acted. But this is a matter of honor. I must defend her, if not her actions." the buss-boy said.
"I understand, but before you start with the defending, can I get your name?" Xander asked.
the buss-boy looked at Xander strangely, but with a firm nod and a slight bow he said, "My name is Mouse."
Xander returned the bow and said, "My name is Xander." before he could add, let's take this outside. Mouse attacked.
He was pretty quick too. The double Chinese style swords came out of nowhere. Xander ducked and weaved at first, but when he was far enough, he willed the staff, or stake to his hand and had it expand to its full battle staff length.
He started blocking the strikes. Weapons gave him an edge. The problem he came to Japan to correct was the hand to hand.
The girls had made room and retreated to the edge of the restaurant to get out of the way. Cass-y-D had a gleam in her eye. She wanted to jump in, but Barbara held her back with a shake of her head.
Shampoo came running attracted by the sounds of combat. She thought that her Ranma had come by and had to beat up Mouse. She brought out a pitcher of water with her to take care of 'Duck Boy'.
"Ayah Mouse! What you do to Airen?" she shouted. She threw the pitcher at Mouse. Xander ducked and the pitcher hit Mouse in the head. It shattered and the water splashed all over his body. A body which disappeared, with nothing left behind, but the wet soggy clothes. Shampoo was surprised. Mouse was fighting stupid customer. What surprised her even more was that stupid customer was good enough to hold off Mouse without too much effort.
"What the hell?" Xander yelled. "What did you do to him?" Xander shouted at the surly waitress pointing his battle staff in her direction.
"None of your business you ugly stupid customer." Shampoo challenged. The nerve of that man ordering her about like that.
"What is wrong with you? Bring him back. I don't care what kind of magic potion you splashed him with? There was no reason to do that to him." Xander threatened the girl.
"Ayah! Is stupid customer challenging Shampoo?" she said pulling out a pair of Chinese maces from the same place the boy pulled out his sword. They came from behind her back, but she wasn't carrying anything there before. He shuddered at the mental picture that image conjured up. Before he could reply to her challenge a Duck with same glasses that were on the Mouse's head flew out of the wet clothes and attacked him, with furious quacks and wing blows, Mouse drove Xander back.
Xander nowadays, was enough of a detective to put two and two together and get four. He assumed that the Duck had to be Mouse. Instead of attacking the en-spelled boy. He grabbed him by the wings and held him off.
"Hold on Mouse. We'll fix this I promise." Xander said firmly to the agitated Duck.
Mouse couldn't believe his Duck ears. After all that he had done, this man was still willing to help him. He calmed down and stopped struggling. He whimpered out a questioning quack.
"That's right man. I'll help you get back to normal. No matter what kind of potion she used." Xander promised.
"Ayah! Stupid customer know nothing." she accused pointing her her mace at his head.
"What is all the commotion out there?" said an ancient voice. "Can't a body cook in peace?" said a small shriveled up old woman who hopped into the Dinning room on top of an ancient stick.
Nowadays Xander was made of sterner stuff. Instead of screaming he only eeped.