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This story is No. 3 in the series "A Girl and Her Time Lord". You may wish to read the series introduction and the preceeding stories first.

Summary: Dawn, the Doctor, and the rest of our merry band discover even more hazards of traveling in the TARDIS when you're also the Key to all worlds.

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
Dr. Who/Torchwood > Dawn-CenteredMoragMacPherson + 1 otherFR152321,75038824,79822 Jun 0928 Dec 13No

Part 21: The Universe Works on a Math Equation

Time Lord physiology had a couple of perks, Dawn decided while hanging half out of the TARDIS to lower the surprisingly dense weight of Captain John down to his appointed task. The binary circulatory system definitely ranked up there, as did the skin's natural resilience eliminating the need to develop calluses. "Heave, you scurvy dogs!" she shouted.

"Are you sure you want to be encouraging 'heaving,' Dawn?" grunted Martha as she tugged at the rope. "Because I could sort of use a Kwells right now."

"No one here has a vitamin C deficiency," added the Doctor from his position by the console.

"Not a canine, thtill definitely reptilian," mentioned Clark.

"Your language lacks a word for my clade," said Proxan, the anchor of the rope team.

Dawn sighed, using her right hand to push her hair back out of her face. "No fans of pirate movies here, huh?"

"Larger concerns at the moment, Dawn," hollered the Doctor. "The jets appear to be preparing for their first attack run, and our doors are wide open!"

"I kind of already noticed that, Doctor," snapped Dawn, leaning further out of the open doors. "You okay down there, John?" The general noise and rushing air drowned out his reply, but the hand gesture was unmistakable. "He's just fine," said Dawn, passing along the underlying meaning. "How's about our drivers?" she asked, twisting her head upwards this time.

"Little saddle sore, ma'am," responded Bob.

Dawn grinned. "Just keep steering her left, no worries."

Martha had to stop herself from releasing the rope as the sound of jet engines in far too close of proximity shook the TARDIS. The others also flinched, and Martha groaned as the rope swung wide, John's shrieking indecipherable but audible in the ship. "Dawn, the RAF is overhead, exactly how don't we have any worries?"

"Because what you just heard was the dull sound of sharp math," said Dawn. Martha looked over at Clark, who shook his head.

Apparently the Doctor understood. "Dawn, you didn't!" said the Doctor, his eyes wide.

Dawn's eyes twinkled. "I did. Looks like John's in position."


Minutes earlier...

Dawn made sure she was the one in the lead position to throw open the doors. The ring on her right hand flashed in the sunlight. Several dozen meters away, a flock of nearly a hundred ducks, already in a state of alert due to the tremors caused by the galloping of several tons of Skarasen, caught sight of the flash and, as group, immediately burst into flight. Faced with numerous threats on the ground, the ducks sought altitude rather than distance.

"This is Hawk One, Hawk One to Greyhound actual, canceling approach attempt one due to risk of bird strike!" Hawk One veered right and down, trying to avoid the mass of poultry that had swarmed the airspace, coming within three hundred meters of his target but unable to deliver the payload.

"Roger that, Hawk One."

Hawk One took a deep breath as he regained altitude. "Will begin circling for a second approach."


"You peeked! You peeked into the immediate future of our personal time line! Peeking is against the rules," shouted the Doctor.

Dawn rolled her eyes. "Maybe for Time Lords, but as the Key, I get to write the rules and I say that peeking is totally allowed. And after I peeked, all I needed to do was nudge and now we're not all radioactive, so I think it was an entirely justifiable peek, even by Time Lord standards." The rocking of the TARDIS began to settle, indicating that John was having some success with his appointed task and the Skarasen was slowing down. His success was further heralded by the splash of Skarasen saliva that flew through the doors, soaking Dawn and Martha. "Blech!"

"That's what you get for breaking the rules," chimed the Doctor, his smirk interrupted as gravity suddenly disappeared. "Oh shi-" but it wasn't gravity disappearing, merely the illusion of it as the Skarasen dropped the TARDIS out of its jaws and the ship plummeted fifteen meters to the ground. The rope crew released their grip in reflexes of self-preservation, which also kept them from dragging Captain John down to the ground with them.

The Doctor rubbed his aching head and pushed himself up. "Are we all alive?"

Clark's tongue lolled out of his mouth, Martha and Dawn secured under either arm to keep them safely inside the ship."Yeth, but thore," he said.

"And a little bit sticky," moaned Martha. "I need a bath."

"That's about right," said Proxan, pushing detritus off of her bruised limbs.

"All alive is good," murmured the Doctor, tempted to slump back down.

Sadly, however, the repeated jarring of the ship had pushed Emort and the PENIS out into the open, and Brotox's suckers were quivering as he wrapped his hand around his beloved device. "Alive, yes, but for how long, Doctor? Once again, the PENIS is mine!" gloated Brotox.


Booster's got that look on his face again. Bring it on, buddy!
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