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Who You Think I Am

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Summary: A few thoughts from Faith... Set post-Chosen

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
BtVS/AtS Non-Crossover > GeneralKarenUFR1511,0560093912 Oct 0312 Oct 03Yes
itle: Who You Think I Am

Author: Karen U

E-mail: revivingophelia13@yahoo.com

Category: BtVS

Character: Faith

Disclaimer: All characters belong to Joss Whedon. The song 'Trust Me (You Don't Wanna See This)' is by Lucy Woodward

Distribution: ask first

Rating: PG-13 (for language)

Spoilers: post-Chosen

Summary: A few thoughts from Faith...

Notes: Another answer to Candle's 'third track songfic challenge' challenge. Trust Me is the third track from the Lucy Woodward album 'While You Can'

~~*~~*~~*~~*~~

I don't have to be the town slut.

{ ... Please just let me stray... Look the other way... I gotta do this alone... 'Cause I'm the only one here... }

Yes, I'm sure that Robin holds himself solely responsible for the fact that I've got that all figured out now, but truth be told, that's bullshit. I know I don't have to be the town slut, the group slut whatever. I've always fucking known it.

Maybe I *want* to be the town slut.

{ ... Don't misunderstand... You're the perfect man... But I'm not ready to go... And settle down with you... So close your eyes... Close your eyes... }

What is a slut, anyway? It's a girl that gets some. Gets a lot, actually, and face it: I *like* it. Yeah, okay, Robin's a great guy, or at least he says he is... But shit, I'm twenty-two years old! I spent the last three years in jail. I'm not ready to settle down for good with the first nice ass that comes my way.

Hell, if I'd done that, I'd be back in L.A. bangin' Wesley. And if you tell Watcher-boy I said that, I'll fuckin' kill you.

Just a joke. I'm reformed now. Sort of.

{ ... I'm not who you think I am... Let go, get out while you can... Trust me... You don't wanna see this... }

So I like sex. Makes me an evil, nasty girl, doesn't it? Faith, the nasty slut-bomb. Whatever. I'd rather be the real me and have people think I'm a skank than be all uptight and frustrated and shit. And let's face the facts, baby... I'm frustrated. Robin may have some moves and he made look good beneath his suit, but he's still a suit. It's like screwing Giles... Now that's an idea.

Oh, don't look at me like that. Like you haven't thought about it. I'm sure B's at least *thought* about it at some point.

{ ... I'll be trying everything... Knee deep into anything... Trust me... You don't wanna see this... }

So here I am... Bored out of my skull. I've said my not-so-tearful goodbyes to Mr. Principal Guy and the lunatic Slayer has taken her leave. I ain't lookin' for forever... I'm not even looking for more than a night or two. Xan understands me here... Not that I'm gonna screw him. Been there, done that, still got the Polaroids. 'Sides that, he's still grieving, and it sure as hell wouldn't be no strings attached.

I'm a no strings attached kinda gal.

{ ... I can't help myself... I fell like someone else... You're gonna thank me someday... I'm saving you the heartache baby... }

And I know what you're all thinking: the girl has not changed. Well, surprise, I have. The old me would have fucked Xander, tangles be damned. She wouldn't have cared about hurting him, but I do, so I haven't jumped him yet, which means I'm wound pretty damned tight... Which is how I ended up here.

{ ... If you're still around when I'm slowing down... I might follow you home... But don't wait up for me... Just close your eyes... Close your eyes... }

Random bar, random town, just another city to search for new Slayers. We've found a bunch, scared the shit out of several, and a few have scared the shit out of us. Some girls just should have never been called... Kind of freaky that I'm not the nuttiest Slayer out there. And Robin would get on my case for that. Callin' myself a nut.

{ ... I'm not who you think I am... Let go, get out while you can... Trust me... You don't wanna see this... }

He's all for me be accepting of myself, thinkin' he knows me and shit, but here's the deal: I know myself pretty damn well, and I can be nuttier than a fucking fruitcake, okay? If he doesn't like that, then I guess he got himself tangled up with the wrong Slayer. Shit, even I can tell that he started off interested in B, and when he saw things wouldn't work that way... Guess he just has a thing for Slayers.

Maybe he has mother issues like Spike did. But I ain't gonna talk about Spike.

{ ... I'll be trying everything... Knee deep into anything... Trust me... You don't wanna see this... }

Oh, tonight is not for the dead and gone... The dusted and slashed and sucked into hell. I've been dealing with that kind of shit long enough. Everything's crashing down on us, everyone that we lost, and I can't take it anymore. I had to get out tonight... So I did.

{ ... Don't put up a fight... Please don't kiss me goodnight... This was hard enough to say... No, you can't change my mind... Don't even try it... }

Tight jeans, tight top, I know I look good. Trailer park chic, that's what Dawnie calls it. The girl has an attitude, but somehow I never want to beat the shit out of her like I sometimes do with B. Yeah, I know, same side and all, but Buffy can still be a pain in the ass.

But that's not my point.

{ ... I'm not who you think I am... Let go, get out while you can... Trust me... You don't wanna see this... }

My point is that I'm young, I'm hot, and damn it all, I've got super powers. I'm flying high, and I'm staying out late tonight. Party hearty and all that shit. Come rolling in tomorrow morning looking and feelin' like hell, but that's no surprise. No one's gonna be shocked when the see me come draggin' in.

{ ... I'll be trying everything... Knee deep into anything... Trust me... You don't wanna see this... }

Everyone knows why I went out tonight though, and there was Robin with his disapproving look as I took off... I told him that if he didn't like what he saw, just look the other way, close his damned eyes or something. 'Cause this is me. Gotta be me and all that shit...

{ ... Trust me, baby, you don't wanna see this... Trust me, trust me... You don't wanna see this... }

A girl's gotta do... Who a girl's gotta do.

And that blonde guy in the corner is looking really good.

The End

The End

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