Disclaimer: I own nothing. BTVS belong to Joss Whedon and mutant enemy, NCIS belong to... I'm not really sure, but it's not mine. Please don't sue me?
The call came in, and they were off. An unidentified body of a man had been found in a house belonging to a Lieutenant Samantha Beck. The Lieutenant herself was missing, and as of right now considered to be the prime suspect.
Gibbs and his team had been on the scene for less then fifteen minutes when a white van pulled up on the driveway. Ducky had arrived five minutes after the others, and had barely had time to give the dead man a quick once-over. He hadn't established the cause of death, or how long the man had been dead yet. He left the body when he heard raised voices from the front of the house. He walked towards the commotion and was greeted by the sight of Gibbs in a heated discussion with a young man dressed in a crisp, well tailored suit.
Wearing an eye patch.
The colour on Gibbs' face had gone from light pink to bright scarlet in record time. This was HIS crime scene, HIS investigation, and above all HIS corpse! And now this snot-faced little punk was waving release papers in his face, demanding to take the body with him! He didn't seem rattled in the least by Gibbs' arguments or claim of authority. He was just about to launch himself into another round of shouting when Ducky interrupted him.
“May I ask what all the commotion is about, Jethro?” The ME wore a curious look on his face, looking deceptively calm.
Before Gibbs had a chance to reply, the young man with one eye took it upon himself to answer him.
“I'm here to take the body. I have all the papers here. This case is off your jurisdiction, as I have tried to explain to the gentleman here.” A look of irritation had settled on the young man's face, but other than that he seemed unrattled by the NCIS-agents intimidating demeanor.
“And who's jurisdiction is it then?” Ducky asked, as mild mannered and polite as always. The young man gave him the papers he was carrying, and Ducky bent his head to scan them over. He didn't get further than to the letterhead.
He handed the papers back and turned to Gibbs instead. He put a comforting hand on the other man's shoulder and looked up in his eyes.
“Give him the body, Jethro.” His tone was deadly serious and eerily calm.
Gibbs looked gob-smacked. “But...”
“Trust me on this. Give him the body, without much fuss. He is right. This is not our jurisdiction.” Ducky turned back to the young man and extended his hand.
“Its good to see that you are still out there. After the bombing a couple of years ago I was worried that you wouldn't be able to pick yourself up. I know I will sleep better at night knowing you're still doing your job.” He studied the young man's face intently. “What's your name?” He asked gently.
Now it was the young man's turn to look shocked. He took the extended hand gingerly and shook it, giving Ducky a look that was half suspicious, half astounded. “Alexander Harris.” he said.
“Pleasure to meet you, mister Harris. Although I must say that I hope our jobs won't put us in each others paths in the future. Have your men collect the body right now. I will clear it with NCIS.”
“Thank you, doctor...?”
“Donald Mallard. I have encountered your organization before, and although it was an interesting experience I have no desire to relive it.” he smiled.
Xander smirked back. He liked this older man, and began to relax slightly. He also looked vaguely familiar, but he had trouble placing him. He gestured to the two men that was with him, and within moment they had the body on a stretcher and in the back of the van. When they were done he extended his hand towards Ducky again.
“I appreciate the help, doctor Mallard. Thank you. I sincerely hope you won't have to see us again.” He offered a courtesy nod towards Gibbs, before he stepped in to the back of the van, and the vehicle left. Ducky saw them drive of, then turned towards the still shocked and fuming NCIS agent.
“Care to tell me what that was all about, Ducky?” he asked with an icy tone. The ME ignored his hostility.
“Perhaps now is not the time, Jethro. When you calm down, I might be able to give you some answers. In the meantime, let me collect mister Palmer and my kit, and lets get back.” With those parting words he turned and walked inside the house, leaving a perplexed and still very angry special agent Gibbs behind on the driveway.
Xander leaned back against the wall of the van and closed his eyes. He sighed. In reality, this had gone far better than he'd thought, but he still hated these kind of assignments. He nudged the corpse non too gently.
“Wakey wakey Bleach Boy. You can stop snoozing now.”
There was muffled curses coming from inside the body bag, and the previously still corpse started wiggling.
“Unstrap me, you git! I can't get out of the bloody bag!”
Xander sighed again and started loosening the straps that held Spike to the stretcher. He lowered the zipper on the bag and the vampire struggled out of the confinement.
“'bout time you got there. I was getting tired of the whole 'corpse-gig'.” he muttered.
“It's your own fault Spike. Seriously, getting knocked unconscious on a simple staking mission? Clumsy doesn't even begin to cover it.” Xander smirked evilly at him. “You know Buffy's not gonna let you live this down, don't you?”
“I wasn't prepared to take on the bitch's sire and five of his flunkies! I staked all but one, the bastard snuck up behind me. He must've had a crowbar or something to knock me out that cold. Not my bloody fault!” He looked sullen. “When I came too they'd already found me and the doctor you were so chatty with out there was just about to start prodding me”. He shuddered. “Glad you got me out before he could take my liver temp. Owe you one, whelp.” He cast a grateful look towards Xander.
Xander shrugged self-consciously. “No sweat. Buffster would eviscerate me if something happened to you. You were gone over a year, man, I don't think she'd want to lose you again.”
“Grateful all the same, mate.” Spike leaned his head against the wall and closed his eyes. He couldn't wait to get back to Buffy. The ride continued in silence for a couple of minutes before Xander spoke up again.
“Is it just me, or did that doctor look a lot like the man from U.N.C.L.E?”