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Never wear green on Halloween

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Summary: Xander + Piccolo + Chaos spell = ?

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
Anime > DB/DBZJacobPhoenixFR2124,0491133,4803 Nov 0930 Dec 09No

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Chapter 2

Disclaimer: Same as previous chapter

Warning: Character death… I mean rebirth LOL

Chapter 2

Xander was still out cold as Whistler and Piccolo 2 were talking, “So junior, what should I call you? I don’t just want to call you Piccolo 2 all the time.”

The newborn Namekian said, “You can call me whatever you want it doesn’t matter, just stay away from ‘Jolly Green Giant’ and anything that sounds vaguely like that. So have you figured out what to tell the kid? He isn’t go take it well that we had to remove him from his friends for the training he needs so he doesn’t go crazy with the memories, if we had the lookout we could have used the room of Space and Time and got him a year’s training in a day it would have been better, then only a day would have passed.”

“Well, we might be able to convince him that it’s for the best if you looked at his life like I did; he has gone from the weakest to one of the most powerful people on the planet. I think he should be able handle that, the kid has heart that’s for sure; I have seen him in situations that lesser men would have broken at,” Whistler said.

“So, you have been watching him for how long? Is there a reason that you have been watching him? And also,” Piccolo 2 added, “have you been watching him at all times? If that’s the case you really need a lesson in respecting privacy, most humans I have met don’t like people watching them at all times.”

Whistler’s face became flushed and said, “It ain’t like that okay? I just like keeping an eye on him; he is one of my favourite humans.”

“Yeah and Goku is a light eater. Look, I don’t particularly care if you know anything about Namekians but you should know we reproduce asexually so just respect his limits. Also you may have the powers of Cell but you need training too. Just having the powers and memories isn’t enough, you need training to help you control your powers and I couldn’t even imagine what kind of problems if I had all my powers without the training for the first little while, most of the ki blasts will be done purely by instinct and also; I might mention we have been driving around in a circle for 15 minutes,” Piccolo 2 said,

“Damn it,” Whistler said, “why didn’t you tell me?”

“And stop our conversation? Also, what are your plans for the boy anyways after the training? Not some more mystical ‘only one in a generation thing’ because I won’t let him or anyone become a tool to be used as a weapon by those who refuse to fight for themselves,” Piccolo 2 said.

“Well we want him to become the very first guardian of Earth, to create a true balance for the world but it will be his choice rather if he wants to that,” Whistler said.

“Wow, from what you tell me these Powers that Be are going to be pissed the hell off about something not under their control, so what assurances do we have that they won’t have us killed or something like that?” Piccolo 2 said.

“Oh, the best insurance of all,” Whistler said, “The Creator, he has been rather pissed off about how the powers have been running things so he will be keeping the powers attention somewhere else.”

“So, you do know where we are going right?” Piccolo asked, “Because as much fun it is to talk to someone who dresses like it’s still the 1950s we really need a place to go.”

“Hey, I know where we are going so no worries about that, I was just testing you to see if you know where we are going,” Whistler said.

“Oh that fills me so much confidence, you made this plan up with no idea of where we are going. Kami only knows where we will end up.”

Whistler looked at the green humanoid that was glaring at him and said, “I have an idea where we can go.”

“Wow, an idea and here I thought our plan was to drive around this pit of a town till we ran out of gas, well spit it out then,” Piccolo 2 said with an even meaner glare.

“Hey, the Oracles came at the last minute okay, give a balance demon a break here, it wasn’t like we had months in advance to plan,” he said.

“So where are we going then?”

“L.A., there’s a half demon down there who owes me a favour or two so we can stay with him for a little while.”

As they sped off to L.A., Buffy and the others who had been affected by the spell had gone home, everyone had been confused by what happened it seemed to happen so quickly. She would talk it over with Xander and Willow the next morning.

Piccolo and Whistler had finally gotten to L.A., they drove through the myriad streets and alleys till they found Doyle’s place.

“Lovely,” Junior said, “It’s a dump, are we living with the rats pray tell?”

Whistler replied, “Don’t be an ass okay?”

Doyle saw the two people get out of the car and knew it was Whistler and the other guy the Oracles told him about.

He walked out and said, “Well Whistler, what’s going on?”

Whistler smiled and said, “Nothing much, we are just engineering a mass revolution against the PTBs.”

Doyle grinned and said, “That all? So, who’s the green guy and lad?”

Junior said, “You can call me Piccolo and the sleeping beauty in the car is Xander.”

Doyle walked down and saw Xander snoring softy and said, “Awww, ain’t he an angel.”

Whistler said, “Wait till he gets up, then I am sure he won’t seem so damned angelic.”

Piccolo looked at the kid and said, “You have slept long enough,” he went to Xander’s ear and suddenly screamed, “WAKE UP!!!!!”

Xander woke up, looked around and saw the guys and said, “So, what’s the deal? You guys vamps, demons or otherwise?”

Piccolo looked at him said, “Don’t be snide, technically your my dad.”

Doyle spoke up and said, “I’m just a half demon here.”

Whistler said, “Neutral balance demon and got the powers of some guy called Cell.”

Xander looked at them and said, “Perfect, can anyone else make this day more awkward?”

Piccolo smirked and said, “This guy Whistler watches you all the time and may have a homosexual crush on you kiddo.”

Whistler glared at Piccolo, Doyle began to laugh and Xander looked at Piccolo and said, “Thank you Piccolo.”

“Your welcome kid,” Piccolo said.

Whistler grumbled, “It ain’t like that.”

Xander sighed and asked, “Is there a reason why I am here instead at home in bed?”

“Yeah,” Whistler said, “we want you to be the Guardian of Earth.”

“Hahahahahahahaha!!!!” Xander laughed, “Are you serious?”

“Apparently they are serious kid,” Piccolo said.

“What the hell kind of plan is this?” Xander screamed.

“Don’t look at me,” Piccolo said, “I would like to think I would make a better plan then this.”

Xander nodded and said, “So, what happened; you come up with this plan at the last minute?”

“Yeah, we had to,” Whistler said, “When we realized what you were going to dress up like.”

“Well this stinks,” Xander said, “I want to go home!!”

Piccolo glared and yelled, “Well you can’t go home right now you could destroy this planet and you are going to have to be taught how to use your new powers. So sit down and accept that this retarded plan is your only hope.”

Whistler said, “Hey, I don’t think the plan is THAT bad.”

Doyle looked and said, “Are you kidding me? This plan has to be the most half-assed plan I have ever seen.”

Xander said, “This bodes well if we can’t agree on anything.”

“Damn,” Piccolo said, “right now I’m wishing that Goku or Bulma were here.”

Whistler said, “Xander, there is something else; we want to make the Dragonballs for this world.”

Piccolo said, “Yeah because those damned things will be SO helpful here.”

Whistler said, “It’s to cause some chaos for the PTBs.”

Xander said, “Aren’t you a balance demon?”

“Yeah but this time chaos helps the balance,” Whistler said.

Doyle said, “Well, that’s great. What else is going to be happening?”

Piccolo said, “Well because the humans of this world seem to be at war with demons and their like; while I am training you two I want to train others too.”

Xander said, “Like Buffy?”

Whistler said, “No kid not her, if we took her then the Powers would come down and put the beat down on us.”

Xander sighed and said, “How do I create the Dragonballs?”

As he said that he heard a voice in his head say, ‘I will teach you.’

Xander mentally screamed, ‘Who are you?’

‘I am Kami and listen well because this is important.’

Piccolo looked at Xander who had gone into a trance, the others looked concerned and he said, “Don’t worry; he’s talking to one of the others.”

Xander’s eyes opened and he used his power to create 7 gold pearls with different number of silver stars. He looked down and said, “Holy shit, it worked!!!”

Whistler grabbed the balls and used them to summon the dragon, Xander screamed, “Whistler, what the fuck are you doing!!?”

“Trust me kid,” Whistler replied.

Xander saw the sky darkening and he saw the dragon he visualized, he thought it would have been green like the show but as it came down he saw it was blue and silver.

**I am the Eternal Dragon; I have come to grant you 3 wishes whatever they may be. But be warned; they shall come true.**

Whistler said, “Dragon, I only have one wish: in the show that inspired your creation there is a place called The Lookout and I wish for you recreate it in its entirety and then take us there.”

**Very well; the Lookout shall be created high in the sky,** the Dragon said as it teleported the four of them to the Lookout.

Xander ran to the edge and realized they were on THE Lookout, he said, “If I wasn’t still stunned right now I would be in geek heaven.”

The dragon spoke, **You have two more wishes, use them now!!**

Xander ran up to the dragon and screamed, “Last year my friend Jesse was killed and turned into a vampire, I would like to wish him back here and as a human.”

**I can do this but it shall require both of your wishes my lord, is that all right?** the dragon asked.

Xander screamed, “YES!!!”

**Then it shall be done!!!!** The dragon yelled as its eyes glowed red and Jesse appeared on the Lookout.

“What the fuck!!?” Jesse screamed, “Where the hell am I?”

Xander ran up to Jesse and hugged him screaming, “Your back, your back.”

“Dude, you brought me back?” Jesse said, “Thanks, I guess.”

Piccolo said, “Now that’s a good wish.”

Jesse just stared at Piccolo and said, “So, we live in the Dragonball world now?”

Whistler said you guys do now those little balls are going to help a lot of people

The Dragon spoke, **I have granted your wishes and now I bid you farewell.** as it vanished and the seven balls flew off in different directions.

Piccolo said, “Now Xander; while you and Whistler are going to be granted my full training I want to start teaching others.”

Whistler grinned and said, “Well green boy, that’s why I wished for this place because we now have the room of Time and Space to train us in a day.”

“Perfect,” he said as he grabbed Xander and Whistler, he looked back and said, “Doyle is it?” At Doyle’s nod, “There is a tonne of food in the icebox, you and Jesse help yourself. We will be back in a day.”

Doyle looked at Jesse and said, “Boyo, it’s going to be a wild ride for the world.”


A/N: okay I finally updated and now boys and girls; after Whistler and Xander get their training, who should Piccolo train? I am thinking Supernatural, Stargate, Charmed and Smallville. If they aren’t already super powered and not sure if there is going to be romance of any kind in this slash or otherwise.

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The End?

You have reached the end of "Never wear green on Halloween" – so far. This story is incomplete and the last chapter was posted on 30 Dec 09.

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