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Xander Harris and the Matchmaker of Doom

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Summary: Xander makes a deal with a demon to get a few friends back. Open to all!

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
Multiple Crossings > Xander-CenteredEmruasCat + 1 otherFR1852,40311510,1529 Nov 093 Feb 10No

The explanation

Disclaimer: I do not own BTVS, or anything else that anyone may choose to post on this story. Joss own BTVS, someone else owns everything else.

Author’s Note: This first chapter is mine. I’ve left the story open to anyone who wants to add a chapter, thus the disclaimer above. Here’s the basic idea: Xander’s run into a demon who’s cursed him to be a matchmaker for twenty couples that don’t include Xander himself. If he helps all twenty, he’ll get all of the people the Scoobies have lost over the years back from the dead – not dragged out of heaven, retrieved at the point of the individual’s death. If he DOESN’T help all twenty, well…let’s just say there are worse things you can be turned into than slime demons. Crossovers are welcomed and encouraged, but remember, Xander’s not the one being matched up with anyone.

The excuse: I was bored? And suffering from writer’s block when it comes to everything else I’m writing. Come on, people, give me some inspiration!

Chapter 1: Giles’ Reaction

“ARE YOU BLOODY FUCKING INSANE?!”

Yep, Xander reflected, that was about how he thought it would go.

The other Scoobies, who were currently gathered from their various homes across the globe at Xander’s safe house for Slayers and anyone associated with things that go bump in the night, came running into the library at Giles’ bellow.

“Wha’dya DO, Xan?” Buffy asked with great interest as she watched her Watcher head for the bar (why there was a bar in the library was something none of them had ever figured out) and pour himself a hefty shot of whisky, which he then downed in a single go.

“I volunteered to be a matchmaker,” Xander told her.

Buffy, Willow, Dawn, Oz, Spike, and Faith STARED at him for a long moment.

“Xander…” Buffy said cautiously, “You do remember what happened when you tried that love spell, right?”

Xander nodded. “I’m not using any magic. I have to match up twenty couples the old-fashioned way – by introducing them, encouraging them to date…and locking them in closets.” Dawn, Spike, and Faith snickered.

“Did the demon say ‘closets’ in the literal sense?” Willow asked.

Xander grinned at her. “Naw, but she did say I could yank a few people out of some metaphorical closets.”

“Ooh, big word there, whelp.” Spike smirked at the rude gesture aimed his way.

Buffy shook her head. “With your track record in romance, Xan, this oughta be interesting.”
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