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5 Women Xander Never Dated

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Summary: Xander's luck with women, continued true to form after the fall of Sunnydale.

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
Multiple Crossings > Xander-Centered > Ficlet Collections
Miscellaneous > Surprise Crossover
SithicusFR786,01903321,79414 Nov 0921 Nov 09Yes

A Happy Day

Author's Notes: I have finally decided to make one of these things, first up is Xander, I also have plans for a Dawn centric one. But anyway, I figure it'll be a fun little ride while it lasts. Since this is also a surprise crossover see below for disclaimers.

Xander, as usual, was having the worst luck imaginable. But this time it wasn’t due to any of the tried and true reasons, for one thing, he wasn’t being sacrificed, but his choice in women definitely needed a better method for choosing.

Kennedy set him up with an online service, the ad claimed ‘To Make All Your Dreams Come True’, Xander just thought it was the same old cliché. He was dead wrong, which is how he landed in his current predicament.

A large castle sat on a hill, in the middle of a valley, filled with so much serene beauty, and picturesque joy, that, that was what they decided to call it. Happy Valley.

Xander stood before his hostess and offered his best charming smile. “So, uh… Were you looking for a prince possibly?”

“Not exactly,” she replied. Smiling she somehow managed to walk closer to him, despite not having any feet. “I was trying to find a duet partner, would you care to try?” she asked with a hope filled gaze.

“I suppose,” Xander replied with a careless shrug.

“Oh good.” She moved onto the balcony, greeting the sun as it rose higher in the sky. “My, what a happy day. What a sunny sky, kind of makes you sigh in a happy way, what a very merry day. All the world is gay, when your cares are light, and your heart takes flight, and you’re swept away.”

Beckoned by the Golden Harp to join her, Xander stopped feeling so taken in by her words, and joined her. Knowing the next verse instantly. “The air is sweet with clover, the clouds are turning over, oh, yes, they’re turning over just to show their silver lining. My, what a happy day, never knew such bliss, never read of this in a book or play. What a lovely day. What a great big gorgeous, sumptuous, thumping, bumptious, hum-galumptious, simply scrumptious. My, what a happy day.”

Xander knew when he got back, he was going to have to say something to Kennedy about double-checking identities. Of course as dates go, he’d had far worse, but how on Earth was he supposed to have a relationship with a magic harp? Honestly.

The End

Disclaimer: All characters belong to their respective owners, I do not claim otherwise. Buffy and Co. belong to Joss and The Golden Harp from Mickey and the Beanstalk belongs to Walt Disney. That is all.
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