Large PrintHandheldAudioRating
Twisting The Hellmouth Crossing Over Awards - Results
Rules for Challenges

I'm Just Saying

StoryReviewsStatisticsRelated StoriesTracking

Summary: Buffy and Faith take a newbie for her first staking. Utterly separated from anything else I might do. And it amused me to write it. I wrote this some time ago, and have published it elsewhere, but decided to add it here as well.

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
BtVS/AtS Non-Crossover > ComedyMissEFR131696031,27926 Nov 0926 Nov 09Yes
Disclaimer: Don't own BtVS – all belongs to Joss.

“Because, ma'am, according to your derriere, you died in 1872”


'Great! Now I've got random punchlines floating through my head! Just what I need when I'm standing in a deserted graveyard, with no one but Mr Pointy Jr for company. Waiting for …' she looked down at the grave marker...


“Who's she waiting for?” Faith asked. She and Buffy were perched on a stone wall, watching one of the new slayers face her first vampire.

“Jeremy Thompson. We're pretty sure he'll rise … um … any minute now.”


She stared at the fresh turf, trying to figure out if it was moving, or just her wishful imagination. She had been told about the danger, the exhilaration, the sheer, mind-numbing terror of slaying. Someone seemed to have forgotten the boring waiting. She cocked her head for a moment. 'Wait. Boring is bad? In this job? No, actually, boring is just fine.'

“Mmm... dinner!” growled a voice startlingly close to her.


“Hey – she's not paying attention! Should we -”

“No.” Buffy grabbed Faith's arm. “We're close enough to help if we need to, but we can't rescue her just yet.”


'That was quick!' She stepped back quickly, then remembered who she was, and why she was there. She swung her leg in a perfect arc, and connected with the vampire's arm, knocking him sideways.

'That's right. I can do this. Just keep moving... Bend, flex, strike and block...'


“Not bad. Bit like a recital, though. What do you think?” Faith asked.

“At least she had a good sense of her own body. Knows what it can do. She's been dancing since she was … what did she say?”

“I don't know – six? Dance class was really something I never had to worry about. Just so long as she doesn't do the hands, you know?” She put out her hands, flat, as if pressed against a wall, fingers spread.

“That's jazz – Carly did Modern. Very different.”

Faith looked over to Buffy, eyebrows raised disbelievingly. “Yeah... Whatever... I'm just saying.”


Suddenly she felt herself slammed against a wall. Her eyes fluttered closed for a moment before popping back open. The vampire was right in her face, his hands pinning her shoulders back, uncomfortably close. This wasn't covered in dance training. Something clicked inside her, and her knee came up automatically. It didn't matter where it connected, it was bound to hit something painful. It did, and the vampire released her, bending over to hold himself.

That done, she cupped her fist in her other hand to brace it, and swung her elbow down onto the side of her opponent's head with a satisfying thud. After the follow-through, she released her fist, and swung back to connect a hammer fist with the other side of his face. She then made a dive for Mr Pointy Jr, collecting it as she rolled over the grass. In one smooth movement, she was on her feet again, spinning to face the recovering vampire.

“You little shit! I'm going to get you for tha-”

Dust began to float to the grass, until it was rudely interrupted by a hefty sneeze. And another.


“Uh oh. She breathed in. Didn't we tell her not to breath in?”

“Don't know. Well, she'll know now.”

They hopped of their perch, and walked over to the still sneezing woman. “So, how was it?” Buffy asked Carly.

“Not bad,” she sneezed. “First, I was bored – is there a lot of waiting time in slaying? Just so I know.”

“Can be,” Faith nodded.

“Yeah. I kind of decided that boring wasn't that bad, really. Then, of course, I was scared witless. Then, I started to cope – or, at least, thought I did. Then he got me,” she grimaced, “and something... I don't know... Something clicked inside me,” Carly finished, shaking her head.

“Yeah. That would be the Slayer part kicking in,” Buffy explained. “Everything drops into place, and you're dusting bad guys like nobody's business. You'll be fine.”

Carly smiled at the other two.

“Yeah, so long as you don't do those hands,” Faith added.

Carly looked at her, confused. Then she saw Faith's hands, stiff and spread. “Uh... That's Jazz.”

Faith shrugged. “I'm just saying.”

The End

You have reached the end of "I'm Just Saying". This story is complete.

StoryReviewsStatisticsRelated StoriesTracking