Just a silly little idea which popped into my head after noticing a few trends in story telling. Not meant to poke fun at anyone, well except maybe me, LOL.Disclaimer: Joss owns everybody, well everybody that is except for this august body. Everything else, his, not mine, not claiming otherwise.The names of certain people were omited, to protect the innocent... Namely, me.
“Why does everybody always want to punish me for nearly destroying the world?” Willow demanded, she glared at the person across the desk from her. “I was suffering from way, intense grief, there is no way I should be punished for that. Sure I’m not asking for sympathy or whining that I didn’t get my way, I mean I’m not a total idiot. I get that I tried to do a very bad, bad, awful thing. There’s no reason why I have to endure any kind of punishment. Wasn’t having my skin eaten by that demon thing enough for them? Honestly.” Willow tossed a bunch of printed papers into the face of the person seated across from her.
“Perhaps this placement agency can offer some assistance,” he said. Passing over a card.
Willow took it and examined it. “Placement agency?” she repeated curiously.
“Yes, they specialize in offering a new start, free of the burden of past lives.”
“Why do I get the feeling there’s a catch.”
“You have to die, to ah, I see you’re not interested… Moving on then.”
“Look, all I want to know, to understand, is why these people keep trying to hurt me for something I did when I was totally bat shit insane with grief, to borrow Faith’s words.”
The man nodded. “Some people have complex issues, they are strongly opposed to Joss’s glossing over the flaws of his characters, they perceive it as him giving you a free pass… When in actuality we are only ever exposed to a few small events, which play out on the television screen, so naturally we are unaware of the other events not depicted. Those aspects of your lives which don’t make for entertaining television, such as the counseling sessions you specifically requested, even though I’m not a licensed counselor.”
“Ok, so they lash out at me, because they don’t know how torn up I was about it, I mean there was that whole summer in between season six and seven that was never shown, who knows what could have happened,” Willow reminded.
“True, who does know, only you and the others who experienced it… Would you care to share?” the man asked hopefully, removing pen and paper from his desk he waited to scribble things down.
“Um, no, I’m not really interested in sharing that, thank you.” Willow’s eyes darted to the side, obviously something big had happened, unfortunately she didn’t want to disclose that information. It was a private matter between Giles and herself.
“Oh, well, ok.” Disappointed, he returned pen and paper to the drawer in his desk. “Your time isn’t up yet, is there anything else you’d like to talk about?” he asked almost robotically.
“Actually there is, what is this stuff I keep finding with Tara, me and a third person, usually Xander, involved in a relationship?” she demanded.
“My, my, my, look at the time,” he returned, producing a pocket watch from his person he made a show of glancing at it. “So sorry, I just remembered I have a session with a Xena for two o’clock, I do apologize.”
“I thought as much,” Willow said with a sigh. “I just wanted to know how I could hook up with the Willow from that universe, you know, maybe make it a foursome.”
Willow smiled teasingly and vacated her seat. “Thanks for that Doc, you really made my day,” she said. She left quietly leaving the ‘counselor’ behind.
“Honestly,” he complained, “how do they find me? I don’t advertise, it’s not like I put up signs saying fanfic author here, all complaints welcome…”
“Hey you,” a person said, marching into the office, “I’ve got a bone to pick with you pal.”
“Don’t oh no me, look, why is it I’m being asked to date six mermaids?” the person demanded.
“How do they find me?” the writer wondered out loud a second time, as Xander Harris took a seat across from him.The End