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Never Gonna Be Alone

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Summary: Buffy reflects on her time with Obi-wan

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
Star Wars > Buffy-CenteredDarkPhoenixFR1512,232131,5879 Dec 099 Dec 09Yes
Okay this is for Kerrykhat from Paradise Lost.
A Christmas songfic! :D

Merry Christmas!!!

Title Never Gonna Be Alone
Summary: Buffy reflects on her time with Obi-wan.
Disclaimer: Don’t own Btvs or SW or the song 'Never Gonna Be Alone'
Pairing: Buffy/Obi-wan


Scotland, Secret Council base, Buffy’s room

Buffy stared out her window at the snowy landscape surrounding the castle, she wondered how Obi-wan was doing. ‘Is he on a planet where’s its cold right now, or a warm one? He’s probably doing Councily things on Coruscant. Did he miss her like she did him?’ Buffy broke out of her thoughts when she heard someone approach her door. Forcing herself into her Slayer persona, Buffy straightened herself end called for whoever to enter after a knock.

Dawn entered Buffy’s room and watched the fake smile form on her sisters lips with an inward sigh, “You ok?”

“Peachy, what’s up?” the blonde answered her, Dawn rolled her eyes knowing her sister why lying but also knowing it was fruitless to call her on it. Buffy hadn’t been the same since Willow brought her back from wherever that warlock had send her. They knew she was in a different dimension and not Heaven this time after doing some checking first this time. Still Buffy seemed almost the same as when Willow brought her back from wherever. It’s been over a months now since she came back and after much prodding Dawn had finally learned why Buffy was unhappy. True Buffy had been gone for five months, which apparently was equal to five years wherever she had been. Buffy had fallen in love with some, a Jedi Master called Obi-wan Kenobi. Or Ben as Buffy called him.

It took Dawn a moment to realize she had been spacing out and Buffy was watching her with worry calling her name. “I’m fine, sorry. Spaced out there.”

“Anything I should know, any new guys I’ll have to threaten?” The Slayer wanted to know.

Dawn smiled, “Nope, still guy free. After the whole mess with Kenny I’m kinda ok with it being just me right now.” After a pause of silence Dawn added, “Seems like the falling for the wrong guy is a Summers thing.”

Buffy smiled a sad smile, “yeah.”

Dawn cursed herself, of course mentioning that would have Buffy thinking back to Obi-wan. She refused to call him Ben, it reminded her too much of Glory’s Ben. Not fond memories. “Come on Buffy, he wouldn’t want you to mope around. It’s Christmas eve.” Dawn pouted and then proceeded to grab her sisters arm, pulling her to her feet and towards the door.

“Dawn! What are you doing? Where are we going?” Buffy protested as her sister dragged her out the door.

“We’re going downstairs amongst the people! I’m not gonna let you be up in your room and mope on Christmas.” Dawn decided as she continued to tow her sister along.

Buffy let out a soft groan, but let her sister have her way, figuring she’d sneak off at soon as Dawn was distracted.


Scotland, Secret Council base, cafeteria

Buffy winced as some sappy Christmas song reached her ears.

“Andrew! What did I tell you about touching the music!” Dawn yelled at the blonde haired man and then proceeded to chase him away from the stereo. Buffy glanced around to see if anyone noticed her yet so she could sneak back to her room. She didn’t want to get everyone else down with her mood and she just wasn’t up to faking happiness tonight. She just wanted to curl up and- ‘crap!’ Buffy cursed seeing Xander make his ay over to her.

The music stopped and a loud cheering from some Slayers who didn’t have any family to go home to sounded throughout the cafeteria.

“Hey Buffster, finally decided to join the fun.” Xander told her as he walked up to her.

Buffy mentally braced herself and plastered a fake smile on her face, “Of course, wouldn’t miss this for the world.” She almost winced at the fake sincerity in her voice.

Xander frowned and was about to say something when the room was suddenly bombarded by music.

‘Looks like Dawn used magic to amplify the speakers,’ Buffy thought to herself with a small smile on her face.

Time, is going by, so much faster than I
And I’m starting to regret not spending all of here with you
Now I’m wondering why I’ve kept this bottled inside
So I’m starting to regret not selling all of it to you
So if I haven't yet, I’ve gotta let you know

You’re never gonna be alone from this moment on
If you ever feel like letting go, I won’t let you fall
You’re never gonna be alone, I’ll hold you ‘til the hurt is gone

Buffy desperately needed to get out of here, this song was dredging up way to many memories and she’d be damned is she was gonna cry in front of everyone on Christmas eve of all times.


Buffy looked over the wrecked robot. General Grievious was no more, now perhaps people would listen to her and stop giving a single person so much power over others. That much power corrupts even the best of people. She might like the Chancellor, but she hardly trusted the guy.

“You have fun?” Ben’s voice snapped her to her senses.

Without turning around to face him Buffy used the Force to put her lightsaber back in her sleeve and into the mechanism that held it. Unlike other Jedi she preferred her lightsaber to be quick to get into her hands. The whole getting it from your belt cost a valuable second that could mean death in some situations. “Kinda disappointed he didn’t have any original comebacks, but otherwise yeah.”

“I would have expected something like this from Anakin, but I thought you not be so impulse anymore. You’re lucky he didn’t kill you.” Ben scolded her.

“Wouldn’t be the first time I died,” Buffy spoke softly then turned and glared at Obi-wan, “look, I did, what needed to be done. I can handle myself just fine, hence I’m alive and he’s scrap.”

“It could have easily turned out the other way. If you told me you were gonna go after him I woul-” Buffy cut him off.

“I did tell you I was going after him. I left you a message.”

Obi-wan frowned, as he tried to repress his frustration with the blond and remain a cool head. “That’s not what I meant and you know it.”

“Fine, I’ll sent you a smoke signal next time.” Commented Buffy before she started to walk away, fed up with his attitude of always checking up on her. Yes he was a good friend, but sometimes he was a little overbearing. She wouldn’t have minded if she could actually work off her frustration with him. But sparring with Ben always led to thoughts she knew would be fruitless since nothing could ever happen ‘cause of that damned Jedi Code.

So Buffy was totally caught off guard when Ben grabbed her arm. She looked at him confused before he drew her to him and she caught her breath at the warm contact of his body against hers. She gazed into his blue eyes, partly daring him to make the next more another part of her begging him to make that move.

As Ben’s face drew closer Buffy closed her eyes and leaned in, their mouth just inches apart…

Buffy shook her head, repressing the memory. No, she was not going to think of kisses with Ben. She caught Xander waving his hand in front of her eyes and she gave him an sheepish smile and motioned she was gonna get herself a drink. Preferably something with alcohol, though she knew that was a hopeless dream since alcohol amongst underage Slayers was a big no-no. Maybe some hot cocoa then, she decided.

As Buffy entered the kitchen, she groaned softly as she could still hear the song thanks to Dawn.

And now, as long as I can, I’m holding on with both hands
‘Cause forever I believe
That there's nothing I could need but you
So if I haven’t yet, I’ve gotta let you know

You’re never gonna be alone from this moment on
If you ever feel like letting go, I won’t let you fall
When all hope is gone, I know that you can carry on
We’re gonna see the world out, I’ll hold you ‘til the hurt is gone

Buffy grabbed a mug of steaming hot cocoa Andrew just finished making and gave him a grateful smile before disappearing.

Exiting through the back door, she leaned against the cold stone wall sipping her cocoa, as her mind drifted along the song back to a time she was happy.


Buffy smiled as two arms encircled her from behind. She immediately snuggled deeper in the warmth of her lovers body.

“I thought I wore you out,” the man’s voice stated.

Buffy turned her head slightly took look into his deep blue eyes, “you did. I’m just…”

“Scared? Of the Jedi Council finding out about us?” he asked her.

Buffy shook her head, “I’m afraid that if I go to sleep I’ll wake up and all of this is a dream and I’m just gonna be alone again dealing with everything they expect me to deal with.”

Obi-wan tightened his hold on her, “You’re not gonna get rid of me that easily. If your friends ever find you, I’m not gonna let them take you from me.”

Buffy smiled and turned around in his arms, she placed a hand on his cheek and slowly moved it to through his hair until she reached the back of his head, she tilted her head up when he leaned down and-

Buffy shook her head, ‘No, damn it Buffy stop thinking about Ben. It’s Christmas eve and if you’re moping they’ll not leave you alone for the rest of Christmas and thus you’ll drag down their mood with yours.

Buffy pushed herself off the wall and headed back inside, the song continued playing and she put on a fake smile and waved at Dawn when her sister spotted her. ‘Just an hour of faking happiness and then I can probably sneak off, Buffy thought.

Oh, you’ve gotta live every single day
Like it’s the only one, what if tomorrow never comes?
Don't let it slip away, could be our only one
You know it's only just begun, every single day
Maybe our only one, what if tomorrow never comes?
Tomorrow never comes

Time is going by so much faster than I
And I’m starting to regret not telling all of this to you

You’re never gonna be alone from this moment on
If you ever feel like letting go, I won’t let you fall
When all hope is gone, I know that you can carry on
We're gonna see the world out, I’ll hold you ‘til the hurt is gone

Buffy heard whispering around her from the younger Slayers and frowned as the Slayer in her started scanning her surroundings. She stopped dead and was sure her heart stopped when her eyes settled on a figure of someone who couldn’t possibly be here.

Almost unconsciously she moved over to him. The rest of the world fell away as she reached him. “How?” she finally managed to ask when she reached him.

He smiled at her, “I told you you’d not get rid of me that easily.” Before Buffy could reply he closed the distance between them and kissed her hungrily, telling her just how much he missed her.

It took Buffy a moment to respond because she was still in shock, she quickly wrapped her arms around his neck pulling his closer and deepening the kiss, needing more of him. God she missed him, missed the taste of him, the smell of him, she just missed him.

When they broke apart for need of oxygen Dawn bounced beside her, “do you like my present Buffy? I know it’s not Christmas morning yet, but you were so down I couldn’t wait any longer.”

Buffy turned to her sister who almost fell over in shock as she spotted tears in her older sister’s eyes. “You did this?”

Dawn nodded, her own tears of happiness forming in her eyes at seeing how much happiness this man mere presence caused her sister. “It’s from me and Willow. She really wanted to be here for this, but she has Christmas with Kennedy’s family and missing that would cause Kennedy to flip.

Buffy hugged her sister tightly.

“Buffy! Air! Air!” Dawn gasped, but smiled when Buffy pulled back and smiled her first real smile since she got back at her. From the corner of her eye she spotted Andrew heading for the stereo, “Andrew Wells! You better not touch that stereo or I’ll shred your entire comic book collection!” Dawn stormed off into the shrieking blonde’s direction leaving Buffy and Obi-wan once more alone with each other.

I’m gonna be there always
I won’t be missing a word all day
I’m gonna be there always
I won’t be missing a word all day

“Care to dance?” Obi-wan offered holding out his hand.

“Just shut up and kiss me Ben!” Buffy ordered and Obi-wan was only happy to ablidge.

~ Fin ~

The End

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