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Hatten's little ficlet collection

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Ficlet(s)

Summary: into this file I will put all the small things I have written.

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
BtVS/AtS Non-Crossover > Comedy > Xander-Centered
Multiple Crossings > Spike-Centered
JCHattenFR15116,22801210,50921 Dec 0927 Jan 10No

The dust of Spike

The dust of Spike
Author: John 'Hatten' Carlsson
Beta: Hawklan

Disclaimer: I could tell you I own it all but if you would believe you should make an appointment with your doctor. All things related to BTVS belongs of course to Joss Whedon and all things Harry Potter to J.K. Rowling and all things you might know also belongs to their creators.

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Spike licked the blood from his lips and murmured. “Delicious," he said as he pushed the dead body of Lucius Malfoy to the ground.

A cold voice without compassion and love suddenly spoke, chilling even the demon Spike. "That was stupid, vampire. He was useful to me. I will punish you," Lord Voldemort said.

Spike swallowed his fear. His well developed danger sense screamed to run, but the alcohol gave him liquid courage. "Yeah? Do your worst pillock," Spike said, lighting a fag while he carefully studied the strange man that held a stupid stick instead of a stake.

Voldemort blinked and then blinked again. A smile -- a genuine smile -- appeared as he remembered a dark magic spell that even HE was afraid of.

Luckily it only worked on some one that agreed.

Voldemort spoke, "I will... Do you mind if I try to punish you?"

Spike laughed and thought ‘What a pillock!’ "Sure mate, do your worst."

Voldemort gathered his powers and spoke an ancient spell, "Du ska döden möta gång på gång."

It was a spell made by an evil Viking and therefore in swedish and it translated into “You shall face death time and time again.”

Spike said, "Fuck, you are a magic user," before a rain of darkness fell upon him and he was gone.

Voldemort muttered, "That was disappointing, I hoped to see what would happen."

He did not have time to say more as Harry Potter, Faith the Slayer and the cursed White Knight stormed in and started to shoot him up while Potter protected them with magic.

*

At the same time

Spike fell face down into Carrot land.

He heard voices arguing, "Rabbit season, Human Season."

"Bloody hell, I'm lucky that I'm a vampire," Spike said as he looked at the talking animal and the human snack. Then the rabbit suddenly looked angry at the stupid vampire destroying HIS carrot so he said, "Vampire season," and Elmer promptly dusted the surprised Spike.

*

Spike materialized suddenly and felt hurt all over. He wondered why he was not dust on the ground. Then the night became darker around him and looking up he could see a big dark claw coming down on him.

"Ooo my God, Godzilla stepped on something," a voice said as Spike turned to dust only to die again someplace else.

*

Luke and Darth Vader paused and looked at each other.

"Strange, did you turn him into dust?"

Darth Vader shook his helm and answered, "No Luke."

They looked up at the Emperor who shook his head as well. "No, I would have liked to known how he teleported onto the Death Star."

Luke nodded. "I know, I hate it when strange things happen."

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The Car bear looked sad as Spike screamed in pain and dusted himself, it was just too much love and Spike couldn’t handle it.

*

Spike carefully stood up and looked around. He saw nothing dangerous, no one fighting with glowing swords. No dragon or giant lizards and absolutely no crazy demoncars, he really was afraid of car’s like Christine now.

The only thing he could see was one defenseless human. –Sweet, food- Spike thought then the human turned around and walked right into Spike who felt over a week of hunger.

Rob looked as the man fell right into the Christmas tree staking himself and turning into dust before his eyes. Rob stood up and groaned. "Hatten_jc, you put me into your fiction."

But who cares? Spike was dust again.
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