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Zeppo: The Star Wars tales

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Summary: During Zeppo An accident occurs and three unlikely travelers wind up far, far away

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
Star Wars > Xander-CenteredborgthreeofnineFR1546,66102011,4204 Jan 1014 Apr 10No

Unwilling Immigrants

Disclaimer: Joss owns Buffy and Lucas owns Star Wars. I am merely borrowing them for a little trip though the tangle mess that is my mind. Enjoy!

A galaxy far, far away….

As each of the three travelers entered the universe they were each touched by the force. Oz and Xander were merely connected to the force as any life form in this universe would be with a single exception: The Darkside, under the control of Darth Sidious, clouded their minds. While all three of them had watched the Star Wars movies, the Darkside clouded any knowledge that they had concerning Darth Sidious or his plans. They would see things that would cause them a feeling of Déjà vu but they would be unable to place where or why it seemed familiar. Jack, on the other hand, was claimed by the Darkside of the Force. It filled his being, filling his every cell and allowing him to continue to exist. All of this occurred in the time it took the portal to travel to its destinations.


Out of the three stellar travelers, Oz was the luckiest. He landed on a small moon that orbited Uvena III amidst a small order of Shistavanen monks. The members of the order were all a werewolf-like species. A group of the monks were meditating in the tree lined courtyard when the portal appeared, accompanied by lighting and large amounts of strong wind. The oldest monk, a Shistavanen by the name of Riv, rushed over to the site just as Oz came through.

Once he hit the ground Oz began to transform back. Riv arrived just in time to see Oz finish shifting from werewolf to human. Blinking his eyes Riv wondered, and he wasn’t the only one in the small crowd, wither he had been seeing things or if what he just saw was just his imagination. Coming to his senses Riv pulled his cloak off and covered up the nude young man.

“Go away.” He told the others. “This young one needs rest. Back to your meditations.”

Slowly he was able to shoo the others. Carefully picking up the sleeping young man, Riv carried him to a small building and laid him in a bed. Pulling a chair out he sat down and waited. Oz slept more than an hour before awaking. He sat up, noticing that he was not in his room or in the cage at school. Then he saw the werewolf calmly sitting next to his bed.

Before Oz could move or say anything Riv spoke. “Peace, pup. No harm will come to you here. I am Riv, who are you?”


“Pup, what are you? Wolf one moment, human next, Shouldn’t be possible.” Riv asked.

“I am a werewolf.” Oz told him.

“Werewolf? What is that?”

“Well, that’s a long story.” Oz told him, drawing the robe on. “You have a few minutes?”

“Take what time you need, we shall not be disturbed.” Riv answered.

“Ok. First I want to know where I am. Am I on a different plane, dimension or what?” Oz asked.

“You are on a small moon orbiting the planet Uvena III in the Seswenna sector of the outer rim. We believe that the call should be controlled and not permitted to rule our lives. Is that enough?” Riv asked.

“Sounds like the Jedi from Star Wars to me.” Oz commented.

“Our order was established by a Shistavanen Jedi. After his training he returned here and was saddened by the way his people acted. He established our order to allow us to learn to control our predator instincts.” Riv’s answered.

“Whoa, I’m in Star Wars. Cool.” Oz took a moment to think before continuing. “Alright here’s my story….”

It took Oz an hour or two to tell his story. As he was speaking Riv watched him carefully. Finally Oz came to an end at the point the last remembered: Being locked up in the library before waking up here.

They sat in silence for a moment or two before Riv spoke up. “Hmmm, interesting story pup. You are at odds with yourself. Denying part of yourself is no better than giving in to your urges.”

“I am only the wolf three times a month.” Oz protested.

Riv shook his head. “Regardless of when you are wolf and when you are human, the wolf is always a part of you. You can join us here; learn to accept your primal instincts and to control them. Interested, pup?”

Oz was speechless for a moment while he thought about it. “You think I could?” He said.

“We learn to control our primal urges, pup. You can too.” Riv answered.

“Let’s do it.”

“Very well, pup. Let’s begin….” Riv then proceeded to instruct Oz in the art of meditation.

Light years away….

On the moon of Duxn, the portal appeared once more. The hostility in the room when the young power powered the wormhole influenced the planet where it released Xander. Duxn could, at best, be described as a death trap and that was on a good day. The portal once more appeared with large amounts of wind and lighting. Xander fell hard to the ground. Looking up he spotted an armored man fighting with a strange creature. From his geeky memory Xander realized that he was seeing an Mandalorian warrior.

The creature was a huge, red lizard with thick armor covering its entire body. It was a zakkeg, an alpha predator of the moon. The zakkeg was about to finish off the downed man when Xander arrived. Xander didn’t need anymore than two seconds to come to a decision. Picking up a large, pointy branch from the ground he lunged forward and slammed the stick into the zakkeg’s head. The zakkeg reacted as any animal would: It hit Xander with one of it’s claws, sending him flying into a tree ten feet away. Xander hit the tree and fell to the ground. The downed man took the creature’s momentary distraction as a chance to thrust with his blade, driving it through the beast’s eye and deep into its brain. The beast gave one last shudder and fell to the ground, dead.

The stranger slowly picked himself up, leaning on his sword for support. Slowly he made his way over to the young man who had distracted the beast. Xander started straight up, his vision swimming, as the armored man came into view. Xander was a little, disorientated, by the approach of three armored individuals until he realized he had double vision. The armored man leaned down and ran his fingers all over Xander’s body, checking him for wounds. Finally he or rather she, if her voice was anything to go by, stood up and yelled in a strange language. A few minutes later four other armored people, all in different colored armor, came out of the woods. They not only carried swords but also carried what appeared to be blaster rifles. That was all Xander saw, he passed out.

The other four warriors joined the woman.

“Ibic id’ika shabiir gar aka?” The largest warrior, a man wearing a dark green armor, asked.

“No,” She said in basic. “He saved my life. Bring him. We must take him to see buir”

Two warriors split off while the other two stood guard. One warrior assisted the woman while the other picked up Xander. With several shots into the forest canopy from their blasters, the warriors headed out.


Jack had the worst luck out of the three. The portal appeared in the private chambers of Darth Sidious himself and, unfortunately for Jack, he was home at the time. Jack barely had time to take a quick glance around before he was thrown up against the wall by force lighting. Coming toward him was Darth Sidious and he continued to pour lighting into the undead teenager.

“Curious,” Sidious said, “The dark side screams within you yet you are not alive. Very curious.”

“Stop,” Jack protested weakly, “Please stop!”

“No my boy,” Sidious answered, “You will feel pain beyond description until I discover what you are. After that you will serve me, this I have seen.” Screams filled the room along with Sidious’s laughter.
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