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I Kinda Got Hit By A Van...

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Summary: Connor still has one family member who needs to know about that little accident he had…

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
Television > LeverageDemonChildeKyraFR1313,200782,5734 Jan 104 Jan 10Yes
Title: I Kinda Got Hit By A Van…

Author: Kyra

Disclaimer: I don’t own them; if I did I wouldn’t be writing fanfiction.

Summary: Connor still has one family member who needs to know about that little accident he had…

Pairings: None…though there’s some very light flirting/foreplay between Connor and Eliot that managed to sneak its way in.

Spoilers: Angel – Season 5 ep. Origins. Leverage – Sometime in S2, nothing too big though.

Warnings: Very, very light slashy hints, little bit of violence.

A/N: Late Christmas prezzie for TouchoftheWind who asked for something Connor-centric.

A/N2: And yeah, Connor’s explanation of his history is kinda cracktastic, so….yeah….


Sophie, Parker, Hardison, and Eliot followed Nate into his apartment after finishing yet another case. They were all tired and just wanted to relax, but as Nate flipped on the light, Eliot tensed and went on the defensive as the light revealed an extra person already in the room.

“Who are you and how did you get in here?” Eliot growled out as he stared at the young man standing at the window with his back to them.

The young man turned around, shaking shaggy brown hair out of his blue eyes as he looked at them.

Sophie gasped in shock as she got a good look at their guest. “Connor?” she asked, surprise clearly evident in her voice. “What on earth are you doing here?”

“Um…” Connor shrugged and glanced down to where he was digging the toe of his shoe into the floor before looking back up at Sophie. “Well, you see…I kinda got hit by a van…” he replied slowly and a bit sheepishly.

“WHAT?!” Sophie screeched as she pushed past as still tense Eliot and rushed over to the teen, her hands flying as she checked him over for injuries. “What do you mean, you got hit by a van?! Are you okay?!”

Connor nodded with a look of resignation on his face as he let Sophie continue to look him over.

Nate looked the teen over critically as he slowly made his way across the room. “You look pretty good for someone who got hit by a van,” he said suspiciously while Eliot nodded.

Connor snorted. “Tell me about it. Looking at me, you’d never know it happened,” he said. “Or that I got my ass kicked just a couple days later.”

“WHAT?!” Sophie shrieked yet again. “Why did nobody tell me about this? Why am I just now finding out? When did this happen?”

“It happened last week,” Connor replied. “And no one told you because I’m fine and I wanted to tell you in person.”

Eliot eyed him skeptically. “You got hit by a van and got your ass kicked without getting a scratch on you? Now why don’t I believe that?”

Connor finally sighed in annoyance and gently batted Sophie’s hands away. “I’m fine. Seriously,” he told her. After stepping back a bit to gain a bit of personal space he looked up at Eliot. “I didn’t get out without a scratch,” he said. “Had a few broken ribs and a split lip…You should see the other guy though.”

“You don’t have broken ribs,” Eliot replied immediately.

Connor shook his head as he tried to bat away Sophie’s hands once more as she reached for the hem of his shirt. “Had,” he replied absently, “as in, not anymore.”

“No one heals that quickly from broken ribs,” Eliot said.

Connor ignored him, though, as he continued to bat away Sophie’s insistent hands. “Damn it, Mom! Would you knock it off? I’m fine!” he exclaimed finally.

Nate, Hardison, Parker, and Eliot froze in shock, their jaws dropping slightly as the teen’s words registered.

“Mom?” Parker questioned, tilting her head slightly as she looked between Sophie and Connor.

“You have a kid?!” Hardison asked. “A grown kid?”

Nate just stared, opening and closing his mouth in shock.

Sophie sighed and finally let her hands drop away from Connor, the teen letting out a sigh of relief as his body relaxed slightly.

“How did we not know Sophie had a kid?” Eliot asked as he glanced at the others.

“Better yet, how did Nate not know?” Parker asked. “Nate knows everything!”

Connor snorted softly as he took in the four people his mom worked with while he waited for her to answer their questions.

Sophie sighed again and turned to look at the others before motioning to Connor. “Everyone, this is my son, Connor. Connor, this is Nathan Ford, Alec Hardison, Eliot Spencer, and Parker.”

“Just Parker,” Parker said, nodding happily.

“Alright,” Connor said as a smile teased his lips. A smile that dropped off his face as his mother continued to speak.

“And now that you’ve been introduced, I’d really like an explanation, please,” Sophie stated, the look on her face letting Connor know that it had been in no way a request.

Connor sighed and walked over to drop down onto the couch in the living area of Nate’s apartment. “That’s a really long story.”

“You got hit by a van, how long of a story could it be?” Hardison asked, flinching and shrinking in on himself when Sophie directed a glare his way. “Right. Shutting up now.”

“Can we…Is there somewhere we can go to talk?” Connor asked as he looked up at his mom.

“Sweetie, just…whatever you need to say…I trust them,” Sophie said. “Besides, I’m sure they’ll just start digging into it as soon as we leave the room anyway.”

Connor opened and closed his mouth a few times as he tried to figure out what to say before finally sighing and looking up at the five people now in front of him. “So…” he started, pausing once more before mentally shrugging and continuing. “Do you believe in vampires? Prophecies? Magic? Demons? All the things that go bump in the night?”

“What?” Sophie asked, looking confused. “Connor, what are you talking about?”

Connor didn’t answer, just looked at each of the other four in turn, waiting for their answers.

Nate shook his head. “No, of course not,” he replied. “None of that exists.”

“No way, man,” Hardison replied, shaking his head as well.

Eliot simply shook his head in reply.

“Yup!” Parker chirped, causing the rest of the team to turn and stare at her in shock while Connor arched an eyebrow at her curiously.

“You can’t be serious,” Hardison said incredulously.

“Why not?” Parker asked.

“Because it’s not real,” Nate told her slowly.

“Sure it is,” Parker argued. “I’ve seen it!”

“You’ve seen it?” Eliot repeated in disbelief.

Parker nodded. “Yup! A vampire tried to eat me once in L.A. a few years ago, but this blonde girl saved me. It made me curious though and I ended up finding this karaoke bar-”

“A karaoke bar?” Sophie interrupted.

Parker nodded again, her blonde ponytail bobbing with the motion. “Uh-huh. This demon owns it. He’s super nice and can read your aura when you sing!”

“You know Lorne?” Connor asked as he stared at the blonde in shock.

“Oh! You know him too?” Parker asked excitedly.

Connor nodded and smiled at her in reply.

“Wait a minute,” Hardison cut in, “are you saying a demon named Lorne owned a karaoke bar?”

Parker and Connor nodded.

“But it’s closed now,” Connor added.

“Connor, Sweetie, what does this have to do with you getting hit by a van?” Sophie asked, looking like she wanted to start checking the teen over for injuries once more.

“Okay, so…can everyone accept that magic and all that shit is real?” Connor asked.

“Language,” Sophie scolded, causing Connor to simply roll his eyes.

Parker simply nodded happily while the three men looked skeptical but didn’t say anything.

“Right, so there’s this whole big long backstory about demons and earth wasn’t a paradise, blah, blah, blah, but I’m gonna skip over that ‘cause this is a long enough story as it is,” Connor said. “Starting at the beginning of the relevant information, about four hundred years ago, there was this prostitute that was dying of syphilis-”

“What does a prostitute dying of syphilis four hundred years ago have to do with you getting hit by a van?” Nate asked, cutting into Connor’s story.

Connor glared at the older man. “I’m getting there,” he said. “Anyway, this vampire called the Master turned her. Couple hundred years go by and she meets this Irish guy who’s a bit of a drunk. She bites him, turns him, and makes him one of the most sadistic vampires in history. They spend over a century together, and then he bites the wrong chick. She was a gypsy and her death pissed off her family, so they cursed this vampire. They gave him his soul.

“So, a hundred and fifty years of all this bad shit and he suddenly feels bad about it all. She’s disgusted with him and leaves him, but before that happened, there was this vampire hunter. They killed his family, turned his daughter, forcing him to stake his own daughter. Guy vows revenge.

“Anyway, back to the soul. Vamp gets his soul back, she leaves him, he spends a hundred years living off rats, and then ends up working for the Powers That Be as a champion for Good.

“Shit happens, he stakes his sire, more shit happens, he ends up in L.A. There’s this evil law firm in L.A. called Wolfram and Hart, and they didn’t like this vamp, right? So they decide that to hurt him, they’re going to bring back his sire. Only, when they do it, she’s human and dying of syphilis again. She finally accepts she’s going to die and the firm gets her crazy grand-childe to turn her again. So, she’s evil again and still helping the law firm fuck with the good vamp. Things happen, they fuck, and, because of a prophecy, she ends up pregnant. Which, by the way, shouldn’t be able to happen. She stakes herself so that the kid can be born.

“Now the good vamp is a daddy and things are great. Except that the vampire hunter that vowed revenge teamed up with this demon that pulled him forward in time. He steals the kid and raises him in this hell dimension, one of the worst. Kid manages to escape when he’s sixteen, only what was sixteen years in hell was only a few months here. And the kid’s pretty damn loony tunes by that point from growing up in hell, right? And he’s been raised to hate his real dad.

“Again, shit happens, the vampire hunter ends up dead, the vamp spends a summer in a metal box on the bottom of the ocean courtesy of his son, good vamp gets pulled out of the ocean, more shit happens, near apocalypse, kid ends up even more bat shit crazy than before. He ends up almost blowing up this store full of people along with himself. Only his dad makes this deal with the evil law firm; he’ll take over the L.A. branch like they want, though I have no idea why they do, and in exchange, his son’s life gets re-written. No vampire parents, no being kidnapped, no growing up in hell, no going completely crazy. Instead he gets normal parents and a normal life and doesn’t remember a thing about his original life. Deal’s made, signed in blood and all that good shit, and poof! Kid has a new life, one where he has normal parents, to the point where they split when he was little and his dad’s remarried, though the kid is still close with his mom. He grows up, goes to school, dates pretty girls, gets into a kick ass college. Everything is perfectly normal…until the kid gets hit by a van…and gets right back up.

“Cop suggests they go see these people at the evil law firm. Turns out there was this other prophecy the kid was involved in and the guy that gave the kid his new life wanted him to fulfill it. Kid got his ass kicked by this demon trying to do so until this other guy broke this mystical whats-it and the kid got his original memories back. Kid kicks ass, fulfills the prophecy, cryptically tells his real dad that he gets it and it’s okay, goes home with his dad and step-mom, can’t take the normalcy, and skips town to go see his mom. He sneaks into her pseudo-boyfriend’s place to wait for them, tells her he got hit by a van, she freaks, he explains, and now he’s hoping like hell that she doesn’t send him to the loony bin for telling her this story…And that she still loves him even though he isn’t actually hers ‘cause he has no idea where to go if she doesn’t.”

Connor took a deep breath and let it out in a huff as he glanced up through his hair to see his mom and the others staring at him in shock, blinking slowly.

“Okay, so that loony bin idea might not be a bad one,” Hardison said slowly as he inched away from Connor.

“I believe him.” Parker stated firmly, nodding her head once as though to back up her statement.

Nate turned to look at Parker incredulously. “You can’t be serious! That’s crazy, Parker! Even for you.”

“Hey!” Parker exclaimed looking slightly hurt at Nate’s words.

“Can you prove it?” Eliot asked as he looked over Connor closely.

Connor shrugged. “I don’t really know how to prove the whole ‘grew up in a hell dimension’ thing or the ‘I should only be about a year old’ thing, but…I can prove the strength part.”

“Strength part?” Eliot asked.

“Did I not mention that?” Connor asked as he thought back over the story he had just told. “Oh, well, part of the vampire parents package is enhanced strength. Healing, too. And speed. And senses.”

“And you can prove that part?” Nate asked, clearly not believing it.

Connor nodded and before anyone could so much as blink, Connor was up out of his seat and across the room. He stayed there for a second before just as quickly returning to the living area, this time remaining on his feet, though.

Eliot had jumped to his feet defensively when he saw Connor on the other side of the room. “What the hell!”

Connor stared at Eliot for a moment before smirking slightly. “Hit me.”

“What?!” Sophie yelped as she jumped to her feet. “No!”

“Don’t worry, it won’t hurt me,” Connor told her, not taking his eyes off Eliot. “Come on. Hit me.”

“Connor! No!” Sophie protested.

Connor turned to look at her and Eliot, who had been watching the teen closely, swung out in a hit that would have been devastating…if it had connected. Connor had dodged the blow without even looking.

“Eliot!” Sophie screamed, letting out another shriek as the hitter swung at her son once more.

Connor grinned as he easily danced out of Eliot’s reach, watching as the other man’s eyes narrowed before he followed after Connor. The teen stopped in a more open area of the apartment before swinging out, pulling his punch at the last second so that he barely tapped Eliot’s chin.

“Gods, I haven’t had a good spar in ages!” Connor exclaimed, grin still firmly fixed on his face. “Come on, let’s see what you’ve got!”

The two circled each other for a moment before Eliot abruptly dropped to the ground, sweeping a leg under Connor, the teen easily jumping it and dancing back out of reach once again. He waited until Eliot was back on his feet before lashing out with a kick that he let connect with a tiny bit more force than his earlier punch, sending Eliot stumbling back a few steps. A feral grin broke out on Eliot’s face as he threw himself at Connor, realizing he really wasn’t going to hurt the teen. The two seemed to dance around the apartment, both a flurry of movement as they punched, kicked, ducked, and dodged.

After a solid five minutes, Parker leaned over toward Hardison slightly, her eyes never leaving the two men in front of her. “Thousand bucks says Connor wins,” she whispered.

“What?!” Hardison asked as he looked at her in shock. “You want to bet on them? And you think the kid will win?”

Parker just nodded, her eyes still on the sparring match.

“But…We’ve seen Eliot fight. No way he’ll lose,” Hardison argued.

“Then you won’t have a problem betting on it, will you?” Parker challenged.

Hardison watched the two men for a moment, deciding they seemed pretty evenly matched but still fairly certain Eliot wouldn’t lose. “You’re on,” he agreed finally.

Parker just grinned.

Connor’s grin shifted to a smirk. “They’re betting on us, you know,” he commented as he caught Eliot’s foot, halting his kick, and pushing the foot away before going into a roundhouse of his own and knocking the hitter back a few steps.

“Really?” Eliot asked, blocking a punch and sidestepping, throwing a punch of his own, grinning when it connected.

Connor nodded as they continued to move. “Parker and Hardison. Thousand bucks.”

“Who’s betting on who?” Eliot asked as he ducked a swing from Connor.

“Hardison thinks you’ll win,” Connor replied. He paused for a second as he sent a flurry of kicks and punches at Eliot, the older man dodging most of them. “Too bad he’s going to lose.”

“It ain’t over yet,” Eliot countered.

Connor simply grinned and kicked out, knocking Eliot backwards a few paces before reaching out and grabbing his wrist before he’d stopped moving, pulling him back and flipping the larger man over his shoulder. Eliot landed on his back on the floor with an ‘oof’ as the air was knocked out of him and Connor swiftly moved to straddle him, one hand holding the other man’s arms above his head while the other hovered over his throat.

“Yes, it is,” he stated, a smirk on his face and his eyes dancing.

“Holy shit…” Hardison breathed.

Parker grinned, finally taking her eyes off of the two brunets to look at Hardison. “You owe me a thousand dollars,” she said happily.

Hardison just nodded slowly, eyes still glued to where Eliot had so obviously lost.

Eliot stared up at the teen above him and arched an eyebrow. “You gonna get off me anytime soon?”

Connor’s smirk widened as he stayed where he was. “Do you want me to?” he replied.

“Your mother’s in the room,” Eliot countered.

“Hmmm…Point,” Connor murmured before rising swiftly to his feet, holding out a hand and helping Eliot stand up as well.

“You…what? How?” Sophie stuttered as Connor and Eliot turned back to face the others once more.

Connor grimaced. “Please don’t make me repeat that whole story,” he said pleadingly.

“That…that was all true?” Sophie asked.

Connor just nodded and watched as Sophie ran through the story in her head.

“Well…I don’t care,” Sophie stated firmly. “You’re my son, nothing’s going to change that.”

Connor sighed and smiled as relief coursed through his body. “So…” He rocked lightly on the balls of his feet as he tried to figure out what to say next. He looked down at his feet for a moment before looking back up at his mom and the three others standing with her, Eliot still standing next to him. “Got room for one more on the team?” He asked.


Well, I hope you all liked it! And that everyone had a Merry Christmas (or whatever it is you celebrate) and a safe and Happy New Year!

~ Kyra

The End

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