Disclaimer: Do not claim ownership of Stargate or Anita Blake.
A/N: Aaargh - bitten by a rabid plot bunny in the middle of writing a Sentinel crossover, an Ironman crossover, a really obscure lit crossover, and the prequel to my Slayer vs Stargate stories. 'Cause I know exactly what I'm doing. Uh huh. ~~~~~
“So you're a vampire.”
“Oui, Monsieur le Docteur. I am a vampire.”
“You drink blood.”
“And you're all fangs and grr,” he went on, giving his interpretation of a vampire ready to bite its victim.
“No, I don't,” the extravagantly dressed being began, before frowning and changing his mind. “Actually, yes, I do growl,” he stated, lunging forward, menacingly. Jack was relieved to see Teal'c quickly snatch their friend out of the way.
“You know, Danny, of all the times you have saved our butts with your diplomatic ways, I never thought you'd actually incite the very powerful, very dangerous Master Vampire who could kill us because you were too busy geeking out!” Jack all but yelled at his friend.
Carter sidled into position between the team and their hosts. “We're very sorry about all of this. In our reality, vampires are just the stuff of stories, and it seems that our friend has had a little too much of the late night horror shows for, well, everyone's comfort. If it's acceptable, we would like to offer this token of our appreciation,” and she handed over the previously-decided-upon extravagant gift, “and just return to our own reality through the same device we got here with.”
At that, the team backed away, dragging an unwilling archaeologist to the quantum mirror he had accidentally activated. Once safely back in their own reality, Jack made sure to deactivate the device, and seriously considered destroying it, before turning back to his clueless friend.
“But... but...” Daniel stuttered, grinning wildly. “Vampires!”