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List of Things Dawnie is Not Allowed to Do

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This story is No. 3 in the series "Voyeurs, Destroyers and Predators". You may wish to read the series introduction and the preceeding stories first.

Summary: In Second Child, Xander referred to a List. Here it is.

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
BtVS/AtS Non-Crossover > ComedyMissE + 5 othersFR13133,17645163,92418 Jan 1022 Sep 11No

(F)Lie To Vamps

Disclaimer: Don't own or claim rights to BtVS


“Oh, gods, it was just gross,” Buffy complained, making a face.

“Did ya hear what his happy thoughts were?” Faith asked, disgusted.

“There were happy thought? No, wait, I do not want to know what a vampire's happy thoughts were.”

“A stable of cheerleaders, all for him.”

“Ew. Wait... Could be worse, actually.”

“What, like vamp guts all over the place?”


“So, do you think this is really list-worthy? I mean, gross, yeah, but... really?”

“Did you see the mess?”

“Yeah, but it was vamps.”

Hello: Jimmy Choos. Look at them – they're ruined.”

“Girl, if you're going to wear expensive shoes on patrol, then you deserve to have them ruined. That's on you, not Little D.”

Buffy sighed. “I guess. But it's just so tacky,” she pouted.

“Tacky doesn't make the list.”

“You sure about that?”

Faith looked around. “Yo, X! Does tacky make the list?”

“Glory-tacky or less tacky?”

“Dead Jimmy Choos,” Buffy offered.

“Less tacky,” Faith rebuffed.

“Less tacky doesn't make the list. I've got to keep it down somehow.”

“See. Impartial judge. Not list-worthy.”

Buffy pouted, and stalked off to see if she could somehow reclaim her shoes.


~Tell vamps they can fly~
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