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A reason to be an atheist

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Summary: Two gods talk about their children and then decide to do something *g*

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
Miscellaneous > Myths & LegendsJCHattenFR213450,638912775,3036 Feb 104 Feb 13Yes

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Chapter One

A reason to be an atheist

Author: John "hatten" Carlsson
Beta: Hawklan and Inachis
Disclaimer: I don't own a thing except a funny personality. I could give it to you, because some say it is malfunctioning lately... :)
BTVS belongs to Joss Whedon.

Note: A big thank you to Inachis, hopefully her work will be enough to get us out of quarantine *g*

Chapter 1

The man, a big, strong man who was almost 7 feet tall, stood and waited beside a road sign. The wind gently blew through his blond hair and beard as he patiently stood still, waiting. Suddenly a small falcon landed near him and started to grow into a human shape. Soon a tall, but not huge man with black curly hair that covered his face as he looked at his waiting friend stood where the falcon had been.

"So," he began. "How come you to be here?" the bird man said to the giant.

He looked coldly at the bird man and sighed. "My wife found out about it and of course told Jarnaxa and between the two of them...."

The bird man looked down. A small giggle was quickly hidden behind his hand. "It was about the same with me, Sigyn and Arboga. They pushed me to make a commitment, to not let this kid become evil and twisted."

The giant let out a belly laugh. "Considering your other children that is a valid concern, Loki," he said.

The bird man called Loki smiled sadly. "You are right Thor. I still love them. Even if they are monsters, they are still my children."

The giant named Thor nodded. "So, which is your new kid? Boy or girl? I got myself a girl, Buffy. Some stupid Watcher believes she is a Slayer," he said with pride and curiosity gleamed in his eyes.

"A boy, a real slacker with a hidden intelligence. They named him Alexander, but he’s called Xander," Loki said with equal pride.

Thor blinked and then blinked again. "According to my wife Sif, a boy named Xander saved Buffy's life and he is secretly in love with her." Thor frowned a bit.

"My spawn, the fruit of my loins, is in love with your child?" Loki could not help, but to laugh at the idea.

Thor growled then started to laugh, almost giggling.

Silence overcame the two old friends and enemies until Thor opened his mouth again and said, "Actually that WOULD be a good idea."

Loki went silent for a moment. "It would eventually create peace between our followers, but only if we officially grant them their powers as demigods."

Thor nodded. "Do you think father would accept that?"

Loki nodded. "I do think so."

The two gods stood up and silently walked towards the small town, unseen by either normal or undead eyes.


Xander stood up silently. "Perfect, Deadboy will love this little surprise," he said to himself, looking down at the slippery grease he had spread on the stairs outside Angel's mansion, and giggling to himself walked away.

Thor looked over at Loki. "He’s your kid for sure. By the way, who is Deadboy?" he asked.

"I’ll check it out," Loki said, using his magical powers, something he was a bit better at than Thor.

Loki smiled a funny smile. "Deadboy or Captain Hairgel, according to my kid, is actually called Angel, Liam or Angelus, a former master vampire, an evil that hunted in Europe for quite a while. Now he is a vampire with a soul who is attempting to undo the evil he did."

Thor said to that bit of information, "So he is on redemption? Good for him, even if he is undead."

Loki grinned and said, "He is also a pervert who is in love with your 16 year old girl."

Loki stepped away from Thor as lighting started to flow around his body.

"No undead creepy pervert will lay a hand on my daughter!" he growled as he started to march up the stairs to Angel's home.

Loki put his hand on his arm. "We better wait," he said.

Thor growled, "You are right, let’s see my kid."


Buffy walked carefully through a graveyard and was thinking about school, dresses, fighting, rain, she loved rain, Xander and Angel as a sound made her look around and she saw a group of five vampires sneaking towards her. "HEY GUYS," she said loudly. "Are you going to attack me?" she asked them curiously.

One of the vampires just screamed: "Attack!" as they ran towards her.

Buffy did a jump spin over their heads and landed behind them, letting a roundhouse kick impact on the lead vampire.


Loki nodded and held up a sign which showed a -6.5-.

"I say at least a 7," was Thor’s input to that.

Loki shook his head, "No, the kick was sloppy."

"It was just to tease them," Thor said.

Loki grinned as he said, "But it was still sloppy."


Buffy frowned. She suddenly felt like someone was irritating her. Dodging the arms of one of the vampires, she grabbed another one in a modified Judo throw, sending him flying and colliding with two others, forcing the three of them to land in a painful pile of broken vampire body parts.


Loki held up a sign which said -9.5- this time.

Thor looked at it and growled, "That's easily 12 points and you know it."

Loki considered it for a moment and then agreed with a, "Well, you may be right."


Buffy jumped up, landing beside the last standing vampire, and sent a flying combo of hits and kicks in his chest and legs, before she dusted him with her stake.


Loki looked curiously at Buffy. "You know, I’m beginning to think that their powers as demigods have become active."

Thor nodded. "Yes, she feels like a half goddess of fight and strength to me."

Loki grinned. "That makes it official then and Odin will want us to teach them about their powers and their family now anyway."


Buffy walked up to the four broken vampires. "Dusty dust," she said as she gently put them to permanent rest.

Kendra walked up from her position. "That's incredible," she said.

Buffy smiled. "Pure slayer power," she said.

Kendra shook her head. "I can't jump that high."

"Ahh, I’ve been a slayer a bit longer than you, that's all," Buffy answered.

Kendra nodded to that. "Probably, let's go and tell Giles."


Loki smiled. "I think it would be best if we stayed quiet for a while and gently manipulate our younglings so they fall in love."

Thor said, grinning, "It’s a Thor and Loki operation."

Thor and Loki yelled aloud, "TRUE LOVE!" and giggled like two gods having fun in an evil way.


In a nearby mansion a vampire with a soul suddenly felt fear running down his spine.
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