The Fast and the Furious
Buffy SI: part 2
(Part one is chapter 19)
“I'm thirsty,” John told the bartender.
The weaselly little man backed up. “No feeding off the bartender!”
John made a face. “That's disgusting.”
“I'm glad you think so,” Willy agreed. “What can I get you?”
“Well, as I was saying, I just clawed my way out of my coffin and spent the next half-hour running from some blonde girl who wanted to give me a wooden suppository, I am thirsty!”
“I've got just what you need,” Willy promised, vanishing under the bar to return a second later with a quart container of red liquid.
John took a sip and smacked his lips. “This is blood, isn't it?”
“Yeah,” Willy agreed. “10% human with a combination of cattle and sheep making up the rest, so even a Jewish vampire can imbibe without a problem and at a price everyone can afford.”
“Sort of a blood cocktail?” John asked taking another sip.
“Exactly,” Willy said enthusiastically. “Straight human has got to get boring after a while and with people's diets these days it's probably way too fattening. Willy's blood cocktail is perfect for when you want a drink that won't make you fat, and feel like spending a night doing your own thing.”
John pulled out his wallet and took out a couple of bills. “Gimme a bunch, I'm a couple of quarts low.”***
Unlocking the door to his studio apartment, he stumbled in and made his way to the fridge, wincing at the light as he opened it and put away the case of pint-size bottles filled with Willy' s special blend. Looking around he couldn't tell if someone had gone through his stuff or not. ‘I really should hire a maid,’ he thought, the idea of actually cleaning himself so foreign as to be ignored. Dropping his clothes in a line straight to his bed, John crawled under the covers and fell instantly asleep.*BEEP*BEEP*BEEP*
John groaned and crawled out of bed, mindlessly going through his daily ritual of getting ready for school. Generally you could count on him not being fully awake until at least second period and today, despite recent events, was no exception.
“Mr. Flint?” the teacher asked.
“Yeah?” John asked looking up from the book he was reading.
“I do believe your funeral was a few days ago, would you care to explain?” Mrs. Jensen, his homeroom teacher asked.
“No idea, he said with a shrug. I woke up in a coffin and there was a lot of running and screaming involved. I'm guessing I had an allergic reaction and slipped into a coma, then some quack decided I was dead and tried to bury me. All I know is it was not a good night.”
“Well until I get some paperwork saying you're alive and reinstated as a student I'm afraid you can't attend classes.”
John groaned and gathered up his things. “This is going to be a pain.”
“I gotta use the bathroom,” Buffy said as soon as the door closed behind John.
“That's ‘may I use the bathroom’ Miss Summers,” the teacher said with a glare.
“Why are you asking me?” Buffy said confused. “You're the teacher.”
Mrs. Jensen rubbed her temples. “Go Miss Summers, just go.”
“Thanks,” Buffy said hurrying after John. She saw him rounding a corner and sprinted after him.
“What are you doing out of class with all your possessions?” Snyder demanded.
“Mrs. Jensen said I can't return to class until she gets paperwork saying I'm alive,” John explained. “Apparently my word isn't good enough.”
Buffy skidded around the corner unable to stop herself.
“Running in the halls,” Snyder said with a grin as he spotted her. “I believe that's detention.”
“I...uh, have to go really bad,” Buffy said quickly.
“I don't care,” Snyder sneered. “Detention for both of you, have a nice day.”
The two teens watched as Snyder strode off, a happy smile on his face.
“Joy, I have detention in the school I can't even attend until I get my birth certificate renewed,” John cursed.
“How are you walking in sunlight?” Buffy demanded.
“You?!” John exclaimed. “You're the psycho from last night. He pulled a whistle from under his shirt and put it to his lips. “I've got a rape whistle and I'm not afraid to use it!”
Buffy backed away, not needing the attention, as John quickly put as much distance as possible between them. Unsure of what was going on she decided to consult with Giles. Being careful not to run into Snyder again she hit the library. “Giles, we have trouble!”
Giles looked up from the book he was reading.
“Remember the running man from the other night? Well, he's in school today.”
“What? Are you sure?” Giles asked.
“Oh yeah, recognize me and pulled out a rape whistle. I don't suppose you have an explanation?”
“I – I suppose it's possible the vampire who tried to turn him made a mistake,” Giles admitted.
“Made a mistake?” Buffy asked. “How does that work?”
“Well the vampire feeds their blood to the nearly drained individual, but... And this is just a guess mind you, if the person went into shock and slipped into a coma-like state that the vampire mistook for the individual dying, then the blood wouldn't turn them into a vampire it would've just made them a blood ghoul.”
“And how do you kill a blood ghoul?” Buffy asked.
“You don't,” Giles said firmly. “A blood ghoul is just a human with a measure of vampiric power gained from drinking vampire blood. It wears off in a day or so.”
“So... I almost staked a human?” Buffy asked worriedly.
“We don't know that for sure yet, Giles assured her. “The odds against it happening are astronomical, but if it worries you use a squirt gun filled with holy water as Willow suggested to test the risers.”
“I'll do that,” Buffy said relieved. “Thanks, Giles.”***
John sighed and pulled a book from his backpack to read while waiting. The lines at the DMV took forever and he was almost positive it was what being stuck in limbo was like, but they always knew with what line you needed to be in to get something done. He looked at the long line that wound back and forth in front of him inside. ‘This is going to take forever!’AN: Bless Dragon Naturally Speaking.
AN2: SIs don’t die from being turned, that only happens to the NPCs.