The Return of the Queen
June 9, 2005 4:30 PM
Blaise was lying on the floor of an empty dining room, staring at the ceiling and thinking about nothing in particular. Summer was a busy schedule for social events. He'd babysat the night before for his niece and nephew, and when their father arrived, he mentioned that yet another female cousin was pregnant. His brother-in-law also casually mentioned how his grandparents were starting to wonder where the hell Blaise's future family was. He had no idea. Being the oldest grandson in a family filled with mostly girls already producing, including his younger sister, was a bitch.
He blinked when a clicking noise reverberated through the halls outside the dining room. It was a strange noise, yet oddly familiar. Being on the floor wasn't helping his hearing as the noise echoed.
Heels. The noise was high heels. All the females he knew that wore the kind of shoe to make that noise were banned from the Manor or his relatives, and there was no reason for them to come by. He doubted Pevensie took up the tall shoe or Hannah would be dropping by in the middle of the day.
When the massive doors to the room opened, and he heard an exasperated sigh, Blaise craned his neck back to look upside down at the figure. His eyes widened.
"There you are. What are you doing on the floor? It's filthy, Blaise. Get up."
He immediately rolled over and smoothly got to his feet with a grin.
"Pansy Parkinson. What brings you back to dreaded England?"
He kissed her cheek when she came near.
"Well, my mother had the most interesting tea with your mother and Narcissa. She claimed things were amiss and I decided to come see for myself." Pansy looked around the empty room. "I also heard about your lovely break up and subsequent clearing of the Manor. I simply love what you've done with the place," she said sarcastically after looking at the bare walls and floors.
"It's a work in progress."
Pansy waved him off and still looked around, noting every missing picture and piece of furniture. She'd been in the rooms often enough to notice what was gone and where certain items had been. "I went by Malfoy Manor, and Narcissa said Draco was off at some Council. I'd forgotten he switched jobs."
Blaise grinned. "Would you like to visit?"
She returned the grin. "Certainly."
Pansy looked up at the Council house as Blaise side-apparated them outside the wards. Her eyebrow went up as they walked through them, and Blaise grinned. "Later. Now, we have to shock the shite out of Draco."
She patted his arm. "I'd like to say I missed your vulgarity, but I hear honesty is 'in' these days."
Blaise walked her through the doors and up to Daisy's desk. "Daisy, this is Pansy Parkinson. Pans, this is Daisy Penshaw. I'm just giving her the first tour. Draco in his rooms?"
"Should be, and if not soon."
Pansy slowly looked around, getting closer to Blaise when screaming girls ran by. "How on earth do you stand it?"
"Not everyone has a striving hatred for children like you, Pans."
They arrived at Draco's door and Blaise entered. It was empty. Not even Pevensie was raiding his small kitchen. Pansy finally let go of his arm to look at the small pictures littering the room. He grabbed the liquor stash. "Want a drink?"
A group of loud, giggling girls passed and Pansy took a deep breath. "Please."
Blaise handed her the glass and flopped onto Draco's sofa. Pansy rolled her eyes. "You'll wrinkle your suit, darling."
"That's what house elves are for," he replied, closing his eyes.
"He won't make me wait long, will he?"
"The way you're nattering on, I hope not."
Draco and Pevensie crashed through his door, laughing. He kicked at her head, but she blocked it with both hands.
"You're not that fast, D."
He came at her with both fists swinging hard. Pevensie used her arms to block him. He kicked again and this time she ducked under his leg, shot around and grabbed his throat. She shoved back and pinned him to the wall.
"That was good," he rasped.
"We have company, Boss," she said.
Pansy had drawn her wand the moment the door snapped open, but when she saw Draco, she relaxed, yet kept a firm grip on her weapon. When Draco was pinned to the wall by a little girl, she chuckled darkly. He was such a masochist.
"If I had known that you were into pedophilia and asphyxiation, I think I might have come home sooner."
Pevensie leveled her gaze at Blaise. "New girlfriend, B?"
"Hardly," Draco replied. "That's Pansy."
Draco smile widely and moved to pull her into a hug even though he was sweaty. He didn't care and he didn't care if she cared. He had not seen her in far too long.
Blaise laughed loudly at Pansy's horrified look.
"Draco, I'd hate to have to hex you the moment I see you again, but you are ruining
She was glad he was happy to see her though; only she wished he would have showered first before her welcome home hug.
"How come Pans gets a hug while I got called a rat bastard?" Blaise asked, still chuckling.
"You probably deserved it," Pevensie quipped. She held out a hand to Pansy. "I'm Pevensie the Vampire Slayer."
Draco rolled his eyes. She introduced herself to everyone that way.
Pansy's eyebrows went up. "Charmed."
Blaise snickered again. This was too amusing.
"Draco's, like, told me all about you. Blaise too. Draco's my watcher and I'm his ward. My parents are dead and stuff. I can kill things with my bare hands."
Draco blinked. That was new.
Pansy shook her head slowly. "I'd wonder where she learned to go on with random facts, but I do believe I heard in there that she was Draco's ward. Amusing, yet disturbing at the same time."
Pevensie was still holding her hand out. "I don't do children, thank you though. Especially with the revelation of you killing things with your bare hands."
She stepped away from Draco and finished her drink. "Is Lucius pleased with that? Oh and would you change into clothes that aren't covered in your sweat? Ruin this dress and I'll make you buy me three."
Pevensie blinked and slowly retracted her hand. Draco could see she was hurt. She looked down at the floor and muttered something that sounded a lot like I'm not a child
. He was instantly defensive because of it.
Draco put an arm around her. "Hey, why don't you shower, okay?"
She nodded quietly and moved to his bath. As soon as she was out of the room, Draco's gaze turned dangerous.
"I adore you to pieces, Pans, but you slighting my girl like that is going to cause problems. She's fifteen. Not really a child any longer, and she was nervous about making a good impression. You likely don't care, but you hurt her feelings just now. Well, I care when her feelings get hurt, and we all know how I can be when someone messes with my things."
Blaise was no longer laughing. These two were too stubborn and two good with hexes and too damn quick
for him to risk being in open range. He grabbed Pansy's glass and moved back into the kitchen, making a point to open the refrigerator door and stand behind it just in case.
Pansy narrowed her eyes. "I did not shake her hand, Draco because I do not shake hands with anyone, let alone a fifteen year old girl. I already think her rather amusing since she was able to slam you into a wall, something I've wanted to do since we could talk, but if you think I am going to bow down backwards to accommodate someone I met mere moments ago to spare feelings, you are mistaken."
She took a deep breath and raised her head, relaxing her shoulders. "I shall explain the situation if you'd like, when she returns. It was not my intention
to cause her or you emotional distress, although I'm glad to know it's still ridiculously easy to do so."
"I can't wait for you to meet Buffy," Draco replied, smirk on. "Yes, anything about that one causes an emotional response in me. I fully admit that. She's a good person. Much better than me, and she's saved my life. She's brave and noble and everything I am not and for some reason she seems to think the moon shines out of my arse, so yeah, I'm a little protective."
Draco glared at Blaise. It was obvious he had not explained things properly.
"As for Lucius, I am an utter disappointment to him, which is all right by me."
Blaise shrugged and took another drink, still halfway behind the refrigerator door. "Are you two done? I'm getting cold."
Pansy frowned and turned to look at Blaise, then huffed in irritation when she saw his position. "Oh honestly. I wasn't going to hex him or anything."
"You still have your wand out, Pans."
"I'm cautious," she snapped before turning to Draco. "One of the main reasons I returned was because my mother recently had tea with both of your mothers. She said things had become increasingly interesting. I was curious, yet cautious, at the same time. I'm here to make sure you both don't kill yourselves doing something stupid."
The door opened and Willow stuck her head in. "Daisy said... oooo hi! You must be Pansy. I'm Willow."
Willow walked forward and stopped. "No hands. Got it. Hello, Blaise."
She pulled him into a hug that she knew he would not like. Draco snickered.
Pansy couldn't help the small smile that came from Blaise's look. "I like this one."
Willow had pulled him out from the kitchen and he immediately took a step back, pulling Willow back with him. "Oh no you don't. Not until her wand is put away. I had too many stray hexes hit my arse when we were younger."
She rolled her eyes and put away her wand. "How do you know they were strays?"
Blaise glared at her.
Willow blinked and frowned. "Why is Pevensie upset? What did you do now, Draco?"
"Oh for fuck's sake. It wasn't me this time. Pansy called her a child. You know how Pevensie is about that. She wouldn't shake her hand either."
"And did you explain it?"
Willow pointed. "She's out of the shower and sitting in a towel. Go knock on the door."
Draco rolled his eyes and shuffled off.
"I had tea with both your moms," Willow said. "It was at the evil tea circle, as Draco calls it. Very intense."
Pansy pushed past Blaise and grabbed her refilled drink out of his hand before he took a drink from it. He glared at her. "I'm terribly sorry you had to sit through that. I quite enjoy them, but the boys only have to attend when they're being punished. How is your mother, Blaise?"
"Still a bitch," he quipped. "Prowling for her next dead husband."
She sat on the couch and sipped her drink. "Nice to know some things haven't changed. And will you come out from there. I hate shouting at you unless I'm angry."
Blaise rolled his eyes but did as he was told and sat next to her.
"Your mom was really nice to me, Blaise," Willow said. "She seemed very interested in me and how often I see you. Maybe you should just check in or something?"
Pansy laughed loudly even as Blaise tensed next to her.
"Oh bloody hell. Tell me you didn't say anything," he asked, pleading.
"I didn't have to. Astoria did. She was dropping bombs left and right. She made her mom faint even. It was so intense that Narcissa left. Hannah's name was brought up, and Tori went for blood when your mom got nasty about her being Muggleborn."
Pansy kept laughing. "Oh I wish I would have come. Queenie is still so naive when it comes to her daughters."
"Fucking Greengrass," Blaise growled out. "She told my mother about Hannah?"
"Hannah who?" Pansy asked, still chuckling.
"She was mad, Blaise. Astoria gets really worked up about you and Draco in case you've never noticed, but yes, Hannah's name was mentioned. So were certain Ravenclaw library organizers. Narcissa was unpleased."
Pansy poked Blaise's side. "Tell me all about this Hannah and the Ravenclaw employed here. I have been gone and need details."
Blaise glared at her. "I am dealing with a crisis right now, Pans. Your need for gossip can wait."
"You might want to retreat to the kitchen again."
He stuck his tongue out at her, and she rolled her eyes.
"Your mother isn't going to do anything to Hannah, Blaise," Willow said. "I won't allow it. Hannah Abbott is our liaison to the Ministry. She tried to resist Blaise, but it's not really working for her. He's simply irresistable, as you well know."
Pansy slowly turned to face Blaise, one eyebrow raising up. Blaise shook his head. "Don't say it, Pans."
"Don't you dare start."
"...Abbott? The Hufflepuff?"
Blaise slumped on the couch. "Why don't you ever listen to me?"
"Because you're an idiot!" She snapped. "Hannah Abbott? You're lucky your mother hasn't tried to kill you yet. Oh really, her? Did you find the first female after Ella and set your sights on her to piss off your mother?"
"No!" Blaise said with a glare. "It's not like that with her."
"It never is, or so you claim." Pansy crossed her arms, irritated for her gender. "I thought you were done breaking girls' hearts to prove a point."
"It's not like I've shagged her yet!" Pansy looked at him disbelievingly. "I haven't! Ask Astoria!"
Pansy smirked as she looked at Willow. "Did Astoria happen to let that slip at the tea?"
Blaise's eyes widened in panic.
"No," Willow said. "She only said they liked one another, but she was very vocal about herself shagging Marcus Flint into the bedding. Can't say I blame her, though. I'd be bragging too. That's like getting a cobra to lie in bed with you."
Blaise faked a gag. It was still disgusting to think about.
Pansy slowly smiled. "Really? That's interesting. I didn't know little Tori had it in her to tame that beast."
"Oh really, Pans? You too?" Blaise asked, making a face. She patted his thigh.
"Hush, darling. You know you will always be the prettiest man I know."
It didn't placate him much, and he slouched in the cushions again. "This is all your fault," he told Willow.
"It's my fault Astoria hooked up with Marcus?" Willow considered. "Okay, well, maybe it is because I wouldn't let her kiss me anymore because I'm not ready, but she didn't want to just be my girlfriend. Did you know she wanted to share me? With him? Which now that I think about it, might have been kinda sexy. Also? I don't think there was taming at all. Astoria's probably the least tame person I know. I think he just gave her somewhere to focus all that crazy sexual energy she has."
Blaise was looking horrified.
"What? She's a really good kisser, as I think you know."
Pansy was completely intrigued and didn't know which fact to go after first. She settled on Blaise. "You've kissed Astoria? What happened to hating her and the very ground she walks upon?"
"Oh Blaise doesn't hate her any more than he hates Theo. He just likes to pretend. I know how he and Draco are - all fuss and bluster. Sure, they snark and insult and throw barb after verbal barb, but if an outsider messes with one of theirs, they rally." She looked at Blaise. "How am I doing so far, prettyboy?"
She chuckled at the dark look Blaise sent Willow. "Surprisingly spot on."
"No, Nott I hate," Blaise responded. "That pillock can rot in hell for all I care."
Pansy rolled her eyes. "Boys."
"If someone were going after him viciously, do not sit there and tell me that you wouldn't speak up," Willow said. "Not because you cared, but because he is yours
to pick on. Same with him and you. Did you know Astoria has been hexing everyone in Knockturn who utters a bad word about you?"
Blaise crossed his arms. "Damn right not because I cared. I hated the prick first, you know."
"You are so odd," Pansy said, shaking her head.
"Draco!" he shouted, leaning up and over the back of the couch. "Get your arse in here! Pans and Willow should not
be allowed to speak to each other!"
"Why?" Draco asked, walking in wearing fresh clothes with Pevensie shuffling in behind him. "Because she told Pans about Hannah?"
"Because I feel like a fucking potions ingredient about to be dissected and discussed, that's why!" he snapped. "And the Hannah thing too. Did you know my mother
knows about her now?"
Draco raised his brows. "Well, that's unfortunate."
Pevensie moved quickly and sat next to Willow, who unconsciously threw an arm around the girl. Willow looked at Draco and wanted to tell him that his mother knew things too, but she had little doubt that Astoria would carry through on her threats if he were informed before his time.
"Apparently I've missed things such as Astoria moving on from women to Marcus Flint. You boys are terrible about gossiping owls."
"You know Tori never cared who she slept with. Just so happens it's Flint right now," Draco said. "There wasn't much gossip to tell."
"I wish she'd go back to girls," Pevensie muttered.
"Well I would think Queenie would be happy that one of her daughters is finally showing interest in the sex that can knock them up, or does she still think that Daphne isn't chasing skirt?"
"I don't know if she considers Marcus suitable son-in-law material considering the fainting, but that might have been the legs behind the head comment."
"Hey," Draco snapped, nodding his head at Pevensie. "Can we not talk about this?"
"I know what sex is, Draco, good grief."
"Well, you had better not have first hand knowledge."
Pansy rolled her eyes. "I had to listen to Blaise describe his sexual conquests at her age, as did you. Stop being such a prude."
"Well, she isn't just anyone. I'm responsible, and if some pimple-y wanker has put his hands on her, he's going to lose them."
Willow looked at him with wide eyes. "You're gonna be the fun dad."
"I wouldn't let him hex any boys in my honor during school," Pansy began, "so he has years of rage towards his own gender for improper behavior pent up."
"I'm not even interested in boys my age," Pevensie said. "They're stupid, and half of them can't even throw a punch that makes someone bleed."
"Oh and your buddy Marcus can, is that it?" Draco snapped.
"He lets me help him with the bar fights."
Draco's face went splotchy in anger. "He... what?"
Blaise leaned up off the couch and glared at Pevensie. "What the hell are you still going down to Knockturn for? Wasn't my arm getting slashed up enough of a warning?"
"That was because you aren't doing business with that guy anymore. That had nothing to do with me. Most people in the Back Alley Bar know who I am now. They give me a wide berth, and if the don't, Mr. Broughton tells them who I am."
Pansy wrinkled her nose. "That's a disgusting place. Why would anyone willingly go there?"
"Because Marcus is there. He steps on people's necks and breaks noses and stuff."
Draco threw his hands in the air before he started to pace. "Why can't you have a crush on Blaise like everyone else?"
"Would you like it better if I crushed on Theo? He is sorta cute and scowly. Would you like it if I asked him to play doctor with me?"
Willow eeped. Draco's eyes went the size of dinner plates.
"Absolutely not!" Blaise snapped while Pansy snickered. "You're not going to play anything with him or any other male."
He turned to Draco. "Why the hell do you want her crushing on me?"
"Because it's safer. I know you're not big enough a pervert to act on it or take advantage of it. In case you haven't noticed, Abbott is a freaking hero around here for making out with you on her own desk. Which... impressionable girls, not locking the door? Poor form."
Pansy gave him an inquiring look, which he ignored. "You know I hate visiting significant others in the workplace, but she fucking pouted about it and I couldn't help it, all right? Bugger off." He slouched into the cushions again. "This discussion does not focus on me and my inability to lock a door when I'm about to shag someone."
"You were going to have sex with her? On her desk?" Pevensie gasped. "There's only like a hundred beds up in here. You couldn't find one?"
Draco glared. "Now you've done it."
"I am not
having sex with someone in another person's bed when they're is a perfectly clean and sturdy desk around," he said.
"Or a wall," Pansy chimed in, studying her nails.
"You had sex with someone up against a wall?"
Draco was glaring. "You are forbidden from answering that question."
Willow started giggling.
Pansy glared right back at him. "You are not the master of my words, Draco." She turned to Pevensie. "Since I do not wish Draco to throw a fit, I will not answer you directly, but I will say that I do not suggest things if I have not done them myself."
"Yes, yes, don't get any ideas," Draco snapped.
"Draco, she's fifteen, not a nun," Willow said.
"Are there any slayers who are nuns?"
Willow glared. "No."
"And I don't understand why I was told to be quiet when Blaise first brought up the subject of shagging without a bed in the first place. Salazar knows he's shagged everywhere else."
Pevensie looked at him with wide eyes. "Everywhere?"
Draco pointed at Blaise with a threatening look on his face.
Blaise glared at Draco. "I'm not going to say anything, you wanker. Especially not with an audience under the age of 18, and especially
not to a girl."
"What do you mean especially not to a girl?" Willow asked. "Do I count there?"
"And what the hell do you call almost every Friday night in the common room during our sixth year? I was talked to sleep more times that year than in my entire life, and the topic of conversation was always sex." Pansy snorted. "Especially not to a girl," she said derisively.
Blaise shook his head. "I'm just not going to speak anymore."
"Do you talk about the people you have sex with to everybody?" Pevensie asked. "Because I think Hannah would be upset if you did that with her. She doesn't talk about that stuff. She says it hers and the other person's business and no one else's."
"Ha!" Blaise said pointing to Draco. "Go after her since she's also talking about sex with Pevensie."
A thought occurred to him. "Wait, since you're her guardian, do you have to give her the sex talk?"
Pansy started laughing loudly and Blaise joined in.
"I already know what sex is. Hello, they teach that in school. And the older girls talk, and your logic is flawed, Blaise Zabini. Hannah doesn't talk about sex. She doesn't even talk about kissing really. She says it's no one's business." Pevensie gave him a bratty look. "And I really don't think you want Draco going after your almost girlfriend, do you? After all, he is kinda man-pretty. What if she decides she likes him better?"
Blaise narrowed his eyes at her. "I really don't think she would appreciate you labeling our relationship, Miss Know-It-All."
He turned to Draco. "Shut her up or I'm regaling everyone about the date I had with the Ravenclaw twins."
"Not if you like your face un-hexed, you aren't." He looked at Pevensie. "Stop teasing him about Hannah. You know he's sensitive there."
Willow snickered. "She's here today, you know, if you'd like to see her. Very cute today in her olive green suit with her hair up in buns."
Pansy stood immediately and stepped away from the couch quicker than Blaise could catch her. "What the hell are you doing?"
She gave him a look that said she thought he was an idiot. "I'm going to meet Miss Abbott, you imbecile. I want to meet the woman that has the mighty manwhore flustered." She held out her hand to Draco. "Well? Aren't you going to take me? I can't very well find her myself."