Drinking and Dancing
April 18, 2005 7:30 PM
"Hello, Anya," Draco said. "Have any plans for this evening?"
He did, provided she would come with him and make it not look like a date. Hannah would have fun, and Blaise could not be prissy about it because he was not alone with her. Draco had half a mind to hex his best friend.
Anya had been packing up her things and clearing her desk. Giles had already left his office long ago and it was Sunday anyhow, so it was a surprise to see anyone come by. When she recognized the voice, she quickly grabbed her notecards and threw them into a random drawer, slamming it loudly.
"Plans? What plans? I wasn't making any plans? Those weren't plans. They were just notecards. Just friendly little notecards that have nothing to do with you or fire. At all. So shoo."
"What in the hell is wrong with you? Abbott is upset because Blaise is a moron. I want to take her out drinking, but I can't do that without another woman along. It'll drive him crazy, and he can't be angry because it's not a date. It's the three of us having fun."
It was a tough decision. "Are you sure you want me
around a female who is having problems with a male? I tend to not help situations like those."
"I pay attention. She likes you. Like in a friend way," Draco clarified, knowing he needed to with Anya. "Not a sex way. She said you have interesting conversational topics. I don't think she has any friends."
Anya thought about it for a few moments. "I find your proposition acceptable. Now, where are we going, and are you paying?"
"Of course I am paying, and Oz has mentioned that you are found of Three Broomsticks. Come on. Let's get Abbott before she leaves for the day."
She grinned as she grabbed her things and followed Draco. "I've never found the usefulness of kilts until my recent stint as a human. The Caledonians knew what they were doing."
Draco started chuckling. "Which one?"
"Which one what?"
"Which MacDougal are you oggling?"
"Why do I have to pick just one?"
"Of course," Draco muttered to himself.
They did not even knock on Hannah's office door. She looked terrible. Draco could tell she had been crying again. She had not been home most of the weekend. She had just been working.
"Come along, Abbott. We are going dancing and drinking. I am paying. I refuse to take no for an answer."
Anya peeked her head. "And I am coming along to ensure that this does not appear to be a date. You must come along, though. I doubt Draco would be as enthusiastic about staring at other mens' asses, even though he is the spawn of two men himself."
Hannah frowned. "What?"
Draco glared at Anya. "My parents are not two vampires. Their names are Narcissa and Lucius. A man and a woman. Both still living. I will introduce you."
She walked into the room fully and started gathering Hannah's things. "Angel and Spike, the two souled vampires, had hate-sex and junior here was the outcome. He's the poster boy for those angry-looking licorice condoms. Now let's go."
Hannah blinked in surprise.
"My parents are male and female, and Spike' is an arse. I resent being compared to him or a theorized relative."
Draco tucked Hannah's arm in his. "Let's go."
They used Willow's floo and popped into the pub. Draco and Anya had to steady Hannah when she popped in. Anya hurried them to a booth.
"What's your poison, Abbott?" Anya asked, waving at Brody.
"We are getting three glasses and a bottle of Ogeden's," Draco said. "And maybe some chips."
The waitress stopped at their table. "Big plate of chips, bottle of Ogden's Old, three glasses... and ladies?"
"I'll just have a butterbeer," Hannah said.
Anya waved her off. "No butterbeer. Tell Brody to make those little shots that he lit on fire. Because fire and alcohol are excellent together."
The waitress stepped away and Anya sat next to Hannah. "You'll love it. You can blow out the flame or drop it in a beer."
"I'd rather just have a butterbeer," Hannah snapped.
"Look, don't snap at Anya, Abbott. She's just trying to help."
"By getting me drunk? I don't see what good that will do. I'll still have the same issues and then a hangover on top of that tomorrow."
Brody brough over a tray with all sorts of things on it. He set the Ogden's near Draco, gave Hannah a Butterbeer and a frosted mug, then he a glass of brew before Anya with a shot glass. He lit the shot on fire for her with his wand.
"Oh excellent," Anya said with glee. "And I didn't even have to deal with photo identification. What a wonderful establishment."
With flourish, she dropped the shot into the beer and drank it down quick.
"Getting drunk is never good. It never brings about anything good. Mostly children, to be honest. But getting drunk can sometimes bring revelations that will help if you can remember them the next day. It's also about having fun."
Draco poured himself and Hannah a shot and shoved hers at her. Hannah wrapped a hand around it, but did not drink. She was weighing it. She was not much of a drinker. She jumped when Draco clinked his glass against hers in a bit of a toast then drank. Hannah sighed and rank hers. She made a face. It burned all the way down.
"There you go," Anya said with a nod and a grin. "More flame-y shots!"
When Brody came over, Anya patted the seat next to her in the booth. "Tell me, Mr. Scottishman, do you think my friend here is cute?"
"Aye, of cousre she is," Brody said.
Hannah turned bright red. "Anya... don't..."
Draco poured himself another glass and downed it. He was chuckling.
"Cullen," Anya shouted across the room. "Isn't the blonde easy on the eyes?"
"Anya, do stop that," Hannah said, turning even more red.
Draco was snickering. This was good though. If she was ticked and embarrassed, Abbott was not recalling to be mopey and pathetic.
"Oh sorry, I guess I should have specified. I was talking about the female. Do you want to change your answer?"
Cullen raised a brow before tossing down the towel he had been cleaning glasses with. He stalked around the bar and over to Anya.
"While Malfoy is very pretty for a mon," Cullen said, leaning down into Anya's personal space. "I prefer women."
Brody was chuckling.
Anya gave him a sly grin before turning to Hannah. "I think he swings both ways. Your bedroom life just doubled in excitement. Tripled if Draco's interested."
"I'm not interested," Draco replied. "I'm merely doing this because it will make him crazy. It's what we do - drive one another crazy in semi-harmless ways. Abbott's right for him, and he's too stupid to know it, so I will force his hand, and I am very good at forcing Blaise Zabini's hand."
"I only swing one way," Cullen said before kissing Anya's cheek. "Yours."
Hannah blinked. There was a lot going on.
"So ya need to make a mon jealous?" Brody asked. "And it's Blaise Zabini? I'm in."
Considering the last time she'd gotten smashed, she'd had sex with Spike on the table in the Magic Box, Anya thought tonight had the potential for similiar situations with beter people involved. She liked that thought.
"I just love it when a plan comes together." Anya threw back another shot. "So who wants to start planning Operation Blue Balls Zabini?"
"This is wrong," Hannah explained, as she finished off her butterbeer. "I don't want any part of it. I don't want to torture Blaise, and you can't make him sexually frustrated, he'll just find someone to shag. The whole problem is he doesn't just want me. He wants other people too. I can't believe I told him to seduce me."
Hannah then downed the second glass of firewhisky Draco had poured for her.
"And did he try to?" Anya asked. "Did he say that he was done and walk away?"
"I think I know my best friend," Draco snapped. "He just isn't like me. Serial monogomist. He just needs to figure out that you have everything has needs and that he doesn't have to travel to find it."
"But what if I don't?"
"I have no idea where this horrific self-doubt comes from," Draco said, taking a drink. "But you have really got to stop it. You're smart, pretty, and not a raging bitch. If I didn't think he'd try to kill me, I might be interested. Or not. I don't know. I'm not having a great deal of luck being attached. I think I shall stay single."
"To correct self-doubt, we need lots of assurances." Anya took another shot and stood up out of the booth, keeping one hand on it to make sure she didn't fall as she looked out at the crowd gathered. "Who thinks my female lady friend here is visually appealing and sexually arousing?" she shouted.
Draco chuckled and poured Hannah another round which she drank almost immediately before banging her head against the table.
"I think you are embarrassing Abbott, Anya."
There was a rousing about of applause and cheering for the questions posed.
"I do not understand the emotion of embarrassment," Anya said as she sat back down. "You are stimulating to men and it pleases them. Why should women be embarrassed about that? It's perfectly natural. Humans are so strange."
Draco started laughing. He needed to hang out with Anya more often. Now that she was getting used to being here, being alive again, she was much more entertaining.
"Yer friend seems a private sort, mayhap, Anya?" Brody said. "No' all women like to share so much as you, ya kin?"
Hannah poured herself some more firewhisky and drank it. It wasn't tasting so bad anymore, and she was feeling very warm.
Anya looked at the alcohol bottles they'd nearly drained. "I don't know. I think a few more shots and she'll be dancing topless on the bar."
"We can't let her do anything in public," Draco said in a serious tone. "Blaise really would kill me. She is a modest creature. Fun yes. Something she'd feel humiliated about, no matter how funny, no."
She shook her head. "It's really only funny if there's a vaulting horse involved."
Draco made a face at her. "You have had a vast and rich life. Don't let anyone tell you differently."
Anya snorted as she finished off her shot. "When you're old as I am, nothing can shock you anymore."
Hannah laughed. "Maybe I should go seduce him. Show him to flirt with other girls."
Draco gave her a look. "Are you drunk? Already?"
Anya picked up and waved the mostly empty bottle of firewhisky. "What do you think, Junior? Now, I was promised dancing."
Brody snapped his fingers a a group of Scots sitting in the corner. They immediatrey produced instruments and started playing a lively tune. Brody grabbed Anya, spinning her around as they headed onto the floor.
"Did you want to dance, Abbott?"
"If we are going to dance, I think you should start calling me Hannah."
Her feet were unsteady as she got up and Draco had to grab onto her to keep her on her feet. This promised to be interesting. He just wished he had a way to get ahold of Blaise. His best mate definitely would not like the way Hannah was leaned against him.
Oh she had forgotten how fun Scots could be. Anya glanced over at Draco and saw him leading Hannah around and the witch trying not to fall over herself. So far, their plan was working, if only through word of mouth.
This was new for her. Normally, she heard the woes of women and punished the men physically. Never before had she punished the men emotionally and mentally. This was much more satisfying. She winked at Draco exageratedly.
Draco left Hannah dancing with one of the younger MacDougals with the understa ding that she had better stay standing. He took Anya away from Cullen.
"She wants to go see him. I don't know if we should do that. It would be perfect if he walked in and saw her right now, though. What do you think?" Draco asked as he dipped her slightly.
"Pssh," Anya said. "My only advice is if you send him off to see her, she better have some naughty lingerie on. If he's any bit of a gentleman, he'll put her up for the night and ignore her ramblings."
Draco dipped her again and a Scotsman in a kilt was nearby. "Hello."
Draco chuckled. She was such a pervert. "Think we should take her to her place and see what she's got? Her floo is set up to his."
"That sounds like a sound plan. I don't suppose you have a close enough relationship with this Blaise person to have him in his underwear when she arrives?"
"If he's at home, he's probably in his pants. I could always hex his clothes off."
It was sounding like a plan.
Draco and Anya headed for Hannah.