The Key Reborn
This story will feature two chapters. I plan on returning to it later on to continue with the fun, but for right now we're just going to feature the opening salvo of TMNT insanity. This is based on the old 1980's series, which I recently started collecting in DVD form and re-watched. So expect a lot of wackiness. The rating is only for possible language issues. Thanks for reading and please review if you can. (Oh right I'm going to try to tone down the fourth wall breaking for future chapter/s. I promise!)
Dawn eyed the author knowingly.
The author hung his head.
"I thought so," Dawn said.
"To be fair have you actually seen the 1980's TMNT series? They were constantly breaking the fourth wall practically every episode," the author defended.
"Whatever, I just wanted to make sure you told them this is about me and is a Dawncentric Story... Even if I go by a different name during the course of it," she stated.
"You just told them that," the author said.
"Well then Write the disclaimer and post this already!" Dawn commanded.
"Yes, ma'am," the author returned.Disclaimer: The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles belong to Eastman & Laird. The characters from Buffy the Vampire Slayer belong to Joss Whedon and ME Productions respectively. By the way Joss, thanks for the Cameo! For the purposes of comic license the real life character of Joss Whedon appears in this story intended to be a fictional version of the man, because it's just a GREAT JOKE! The author makes no claims to ownership of any of the characters or peoples in this story. If the site admins decide the cameo thing can't stay... I'll just change it somehow.
An alarm began to ring out loudly causing everyone within earshot to cringe – the lone human amongst them covered his ears and glared at the creature beside him. “What infernal contraption has failed this time, Krang?” Shredder demanded.
“That isn’t the alarm for malfunctions, Shredder,” Krang snapped. He moved his android body to the control panel and began to manipulate it. The denizen of Dimension X tapped frantically at the keys causing an image to appear on the screen and he smiled. “This is perfect,” he declared.
“What is?” Shredder wondered.
Krang laughed. “An interdimensional event is occurring on Earth! Reality is beginning to destroy itself.”
“How is that a good thing? We want to rule the Earth, not destroy it!”
“You idiot! The energy levels of this event are off the charts, by reconfiguring the Technodromes’ dimensional portal we can bring the source of that energy to us!” Krang chastised.
“Is that wise, Krang? What if it destroys this place instead?” Shredder demanded nervously.
“I can easily isolate the energy itself and contain it, here I’ll demonstrate,” Krang declared. He immediately got to work with the keyboard.
Bebop eyed Rocksteady. “Do you think this’ll work?”
“D’uh, it has to, otherwise this would be a really short fanfic,” Rocksteady said.
“It could be a drabble,” Bebop argued.
“Uh-uh, I think it’s one o’ dem crossovers,” Rocksteady stated.
“Oh boy! I hope we get to meet my favorite comic book superhero,” Bebop said excitedly.
“Will you two pea brains stop breaking the fourth wall!” Krang shouted angrily. “This is very delicate work.”
“Sorry, Krang,” the pair said in unison.
“Besides, we have enough trouble with those blasted turtles. We don’t need superheroes around here,” Shredder reminded.
“I’ve done it!” Krang blurted. “I’ve pinpointed the source of the disturbance… now I’ll just drain it into our energy banks and the Technodrome will have all the power it could ever need.” Flipping a switch Krang chuckled in his super villain way.
“I hope you know what you’re doing, Krang,” Shredder grumbled as he crossed his arms.
Meanwhile on the top of a scaffolding built by crazy people – two sisters were talking to each other. Well one was talking – the other was crying – too upset to actually interrupt.
About to sacrifice herself – again – to save the world – again – Buffy Summers was prepared to jump.
Dawn’s sudden cry of pain brought her to a stop.
Whirling she prepared to fight anew, but what was happening couldn’t be fought. Buffy watched horrified as Dawn began to break apart – it was a gruesome sight.
“Buffy!” Dawn vanished – her body tearing itself apart – as soon as she ceased to exist the portal snapped shut.
Buffy Summers stood on a scaffolding built by insane people. She watched as the sun began to rise, but for some reason she was confused. Unable to figure out what she’d been doing there. “Dawn,” she said and for some reason she felt as though a piece of her heart had been torn out.
“Oh no!” Krang shouted waving his tentacles about. The large machine sputtered and crackled. Krang rushed over to a new control interface and started desperately flipping switches.
“Krang, what’s wrong?” Shredder demanded slowly backing up from the machine.
“There’s too much power! The system is drawing it in too fast, I have to realign the energy absorption matrix before the Technodrome explodes,” the alien explained.
“Why don’t you just shut it off?” Shredder wondered.
Krang growled. “And risk losing this new source of energy!? Is your helmet on too tight?”
“Whatever could I have been thinking,” Shredder muttered sarcastically.
“Uh, Krang, that doohickey thingy is startin’ ta glow,” Rocksteady alerted.
“I can see that, you idiot!” Krang snapped. He jabbed his body’s finger into the purple colored button and waited patiently. After several seconds everything calmed down. “There… I’ve managed to correct the device and regulate the energy flow.” He smiled smugly.
“Krang, somethin’ looks weird,” Bebop called. He pointed at a side monitor.
“What is it now?” Krang complained. “You dunderheads can’t even stand off to the side quietly for three pages.” He glanced at the monitor and his eyes widened in shock followed by aggravation. “The core of the energy has escaped from our dimension. It made its way to Earth.”
“Wasn’t it on Earth before?” Rocksteady wondered.
“No!” Krang glared at the mutants. “Now pay attention, you dim bulbs, this exposition only get’s said once. The interdimensional event we detected originated from an alternate Earth, the portal which opened was designed to break down all dimensional barriers. Our sophisticated detection systems allowed us to monitor the event and tap into the portal to steal the source, but… with the energy’s core now somewhere on Earth, the Technodrome doesn’t have enough power to operate the weapons systems. If we went to Earth we’d be sitting ducks for those blasted turtles! We have to get the core of the energy back otherwise we’ll just be wasting this opportunity to wipe out the turtles for ever!”
“Did you pea brains get all of that?” Shredder demanded.
“I think so,” Rocksteady said.
“And if we didn’t at least the reader did,” Bebop added with a chuckle.
“Shredder, take these two morons and this portable energy collector,” Krang ordered. “Track down the missing core energy, but don’t let the turtles know what you’re doing.”
“Why not?” Shredder wondered.
“Because they always mess up our plans that way! Haven’t you watched those DVDs I got you?” Krang shoved Shredder through the dimensional portal sending him, Bebop and Rocksteady back to Earth. “After one hundred and ninety-three episodes and a twenty-fifth anniversary television special maybe this time we’ll finally win for once.” Krang sighed and crossed his tentacles in front of him. “But I wouldn’t hold my breath on it.”
The Monk’s spell made Dawn Summers out of Buffy, but the spell had never been designed to resist technology from Dimension X. Thus Dawn Summers alias The Key was literally unmade.
However! The spell bestowed the Key not only flesh and blood, but also a soul – a soul created by splintering off a piece from the parent Slayer’s soul. Currently the key’s energy was stored in the batteries of the Technodrome, but the soul and by extension the core abilities of the Key had escaped.
Fleeing through the dimensional portal to Earth instinctively. Small lingering remnants of the monk’s spell were still active – unfortunately this reality didn’t have a Slayer for it to choose to send the Key to for protection. And yet champions of justice and righteousness did exist. Dawn Summers would be reborn – only there was one small barely significant difference – the champions of this Earth weren’t entirely
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles! Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles! Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles! Heroes in Half-Shell… Turtle Power!
A group of baby turtles are seen playing in some weird glowing green ooze. All five
of them are discovered by a kindly human man forced to live in the sewers. Upon coming in contact with them a strange effect occurs and all six are transformed.They’re the world’s most fearsome fighting teens. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. They’re heroes in a half-shell and their green. When the evil Shredder attacks… these Turtle boys don’t cut him no slack.
Shredder and a massive army of Foot Soldiers appear courtesy of dimensional portal travel. Shredder sends the foot into the city. But standing there to greet them are five
large human-like turtles… each one holding a distinct weapon.Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Splinter taught them to be Ninja Teens Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Leonardo leads… Donatello does machines. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Raphael is cool, but rude… Michelangelo is a party dude… “And don’t forget me!”
Leonardo, Donatello, Raphael, Michelangelo and their new sister start to wail on the Foot Soldiers tearing into them – each with their own unique weapons. Katana, Bo, Sai, Nunchuck and Kusarigama. Fearfully Shredder retreats.Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles! Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles! Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles! Heroes in a Half-Shell… Turtle Power!
Slowly… feeling returned to her as the coldness of oblivion vanished from memory. Breath resumed and she inhaled greedily – her eyesight, hearing and sense of smell all came back in a flash – and man what an odor. Sitting up on the couch Dolce held a hand up to her nose. “Yuck! What is that disgusting aroma?”
“Sorry, dudette, my experimental garlic and anchovy pizza with gumdrops didn’t exactly work out as planned,” Michelangelo apologized as he entered the den with a burnt and foul looking pizza in his hands.
Dolce took a careful taste and chewed around the burnt crust. “You just need to add some horseradish and maybe a couple of pickles,” she told her brother. “Oh and don’t cook it on such a high temperature,” she chastised.
“Oh wow! Like totally righteous notion, sis,” Mike remarked with a big smile. “I think Donatello needs to fix the oven again… I could have sworn I set it for four hundred and fifty degrees Celsius.” He frowned.
Smiling Dolce reached for the T-V remote and turned it on. Life as a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle couldn’t be better. She had four totally awesome brothers, a groovy Sensei and all the pizza she could stomach, although Mike was the only one willing to try some of her ideas sometimes. On top of it she got to wail on Foot Soldiers and Evil Mutants on a daily basis and had totally mondo Ninjitsu skills.
But for some strange reason she felt this was all wrong – as though she should have been somewhere else with someone else.
“Hey! Is April on yet?” Raphael asked as he pushed her feet out of the way so he could plop down onto the couch.
Shooting a glare at him she stuck out her tongue – Raph was such a jerk. “Why would she be on? It’s only five-twenty,” Dolce reminded.
“Well she’d better come on soon otherwise we won’t know who to fight in this story,” Raph stated.
“It’s probably going to be Shredder again,” Dolce complained. “He is our arch enemy.”
Raph shook his head. “I’d say he’s more of a continuous nuisance or a pest really.”
“Does anyone else feel mondo weird?” Mike asked suddenly his gaze lingering on the back of Dolce’s head.
“Define weird,” Donatello requested as he entered the room with some gadget in his hands.
“Like something’s out of place. Ya know?” Mike explained trying to put his finger on it.
Donatello shrugged. “I don’t think so.”
“Are you sure it’s not just your stomach again?” Raph asked sarcastically. “After eating what Dolce cooked last night I wouldn’t be surprised,” he added shooting his sister a smirk.
“No way, dude! I’ve just got this feeling,” Mike argued.
“Remember what happened when he revealed the dream about Mondo Gecko?” Dolce demanded glaring at Raph.
Shaking his head Raph sighed. “You just had to bring that one up didn’t you?”
“My sons, is there a problem?” Master Splinter questioned as he and Leonardo joined the group.
“Aside from the pizza? Not really,” Mike replied. “I’ve just got this weird feelin’ that something isn’t exactly the way it should be.” Frowning slightly Mike’s gaze once again fell on Dolce.
“I see,” Splinter eyed Dolce briefly and something flashed behind his eyes. “There is no reason for you to be concerned Michelangelo. I am certain that your feelings will be put at ease in time,” he added.
“Like by the time this episode is over?” Leo wondered.
“Leonardo, we’re not in an episode,” Donatello reminded.
“Oh right… I keep forgetting we got cancelled,” Leo grumbled.
“If we’ve finished with the fourth wall breakage,” Raph said turning to his brothers. “Can we keep it down? April is about to come on,” he added indicating the familiar Channel Six logo.
“April O’Neil here for Channel Six news speaking with the current writer of the new Buffy the Vampire Slayer television series. Tell us Mister Whedon what are your plans for this next season?”
“Why’s April interviewing that hack?” Leonardo demanded.
Raph snickered. “You’re just mad because of how the whole Buffy/Angel thing went down,” he teased.
“Must be a slow news day,” Dolce commented with a shrug.
A strange flash of light suddenly lit up almost off-screen and all five turtles shared a knowing look.
“Unless I miss my guess. The was the telltale sign of Interdimensional Transport,” Donatello stated.
“And we all know what that means,” Mike added dropping his burnt and forgotten pizza.
“Time for us to get off our lazy tails and do some fighting,” Raph said with a big grin.
“Yep. Let’s Go Green Machine!” Leo shouted pumping his fist into the air.
“Really, Leo?” Dolce said with a shake of her head.
“What? Too much?” Leo asked.
“Nope, I just prefer the classics,” she replied.
“In that case, Dudes and Dudette,” Mike said. “Let’s Cowabunga! And go kick ol’ Chrome Dome’s butt back to Dimension X,” he added twirling one of his Nunchuks around.
“Go with care, My Sons, we do not know what it is Shredder is up to,” Splinter cautioned.
“Well d’uh, that’s because April hasn’t told us yet,” Raph said.
Leo smacked him in the back of the head. “How’s April supposed to know?”
“How does she ever know?” Raph argued rubbing the back of his head.
“Boys,” Dolce sighed just as the turtlecom started beeping.
“Right on cue,” Mike said.
“I’ll answer it,” Donatello stated flipping open his turtlecom. “Hey, April, what’s up?”
“Bebop and Rocksteady just showed up with Shredder carrying some kind of weird scanner thing,” April explained. “They’re searching for something. You gotta come quick guys.”
“We would have been there two paragraphs ago if someone would just can it with the bad jokes and dialogue clutter,” Raph remarked snidely.
“Don’t address the author, that’s worse than when we talked to the kids during the show,” Leo ordered. “We’re on our way, April,” he added.
“You know I’m surprised she hasn’t been kidnapped yet,” Dolce remarked.
“Don’t jinx her… Maybe she’ll get to be a bad ass ninja babe like that one we met in that other reality,” Raph said hopefully.
“Ok guys, I’ll stay put and… AHHH!” April suddenly screamed.
“Look’s like you spoke too soon, brother,” Dolce said with a playful smirk.
“Oh shut up,” Raph grumbled as the quintet left the Lair and headed topside in the Turtle Van.
“No! No! No!” Shredder bellowed slapping Rocksteady and Bebop repeatedly. “Didn’t Krang just finish telling us not
to alert the Turtles!” he snapped.
“But it’s April, we always kidnap April,” Rocksteady pointed out.
“Besides… she saw us arrive,” Bebop added.
“I don’t care! We don’t have time to deal with a hostage… Now let her go!” Shredder commanded.
“No fair. It was my turn tah tie her up,” Rocksteady complained dropping April onto the floor.
“Ouch!” she said rubbing at her backside with a wince of pain.
“Sorry, Ms. O’Neil, we don’t got time for you this time,” Rocksteady told her turning around and following Shredder out of the back room.
“When do I get paid for this cameo?” Joss wondered.
“We’ll have our people call your people,” Bebop told the writer and series creator with a chuckle.
“I’d better follow them and find out what they’re up to so I can tell the turtles,” April decided quickly recovering her mini-cam and microphone.
“You must really love getting kidnapped,” Joss told her as she started to leave.
“Hey, when you’re best friends with five mutant turtles you’ll take whatever kind of attention you can get,” April returned with a shrug.
“I could use a character like you on my show,” Joss mused reaching for pen and paper. “Now what’s a good name? Winifred?” Smiling and nodding to himself Joss walked off and – uh – started creating the next season of Angel or something.To Be Continued