DEATH IS BUT THE BEGINING
AN1: Well, I have had some serious writers block on all my fics, so I decided that I needed to do something both not related at all to anime in general and Ranma in particular for a while, and that I also needed to not do anything in the remotest sense serious for a bit. Thus this inane piece of work was born. I plan to be, while still letting it have a very viable plot that is both a good one and one that is very easy to understand, to have this be silly, impetuous, funny, downright idiotic at times and in general to write a truly and insanely inane piece of awesome work here, for I need the funny to drown out the shit hole my life is becoming. So, if you are willing to read a truly awesome piece of inane work, please, feel free to do so, and maybe even tell me if you like it. But if you don’t, please feel free to forever keep it to yourself, HA!
AN2: My life is in the shits now, and if you want a reason for that, please read my Author’s Profile page if you are reading this on Fan Fiction dot net.
AN3: This is going to be so heavily AU for the X-Men content that if Stan Lee read this, he’d have a coronary over my mangling of his baby. And I really don’t care at all about that.
AN4: Version 2.0: Changed the name of the M’Kraan Crystal to its proper name and made some other minor corrections.
Disclaimer: I do not own the intellectual property that is Buffy the Vampire Slayer or any of its associated characters, locations, items, ideas, or anything else that may be associated with it. Those belong to each of their own respective copyright owners. I do not own the intellectual property that is The X-Men, or anything else in The Marvel Universe, or any of its associated characters, locations, items, ideas, or anything else that may be associated with it. Those belong to each of their own respective copyright owners. I do not own any of the intellectual properties that are any other fictional persons, places or things. Those belong to each of their own respective copyright owners. I do not own any real person, place or thing. Those belong to either themselves, in the case of a person, or their real life current true owners in case of a place or object. What I do own is any and every original person, place or thing used in here as well as the story its self. Those very few things are mine. And that’s all that ever will be mine.
A PHOENIX WILL ALWAYS RISE
DEATH IS BUT THE BEGINING
Dying, was in one Buffy Anne Summers opinion…
“Well, this sucks.”
Buffy Anne Summers, age… um she’d kill me if I told you, the longest lived Slayer in the history of her world, and a suspected immortal due to, well the massive amount of magical bullshit she had been hit with throughout her life, was temporarily dead yet again.
“I hate this place, it’s so boring here.” Buffy complained with a small whine as she sat down in the large white room of nothingness. As she leaned back against a shining white wall that had suddenly appeared from nowhere, she said and asked aloud, “Ok, so what did me in this time?” When you have died and come back as many times as Buffy has, you tend to get a little…, well blasé, about the whole thing.
“Oh yeah, that stupid demon-hybrid thing-a-ma-bob wanted to open a gate to some fiery hell dimension after it nuked New York. Wow, that was first time I ever was blown up, and by a dang nuke in a friken fire hell dimension to boot. Well, I’m just glad I got that thing out of there while I could.” Buffy then sighed again, and then she asked “But this was my what death?”
“Fifty two times you have died and come here in the past....” A voice sounded off in her mind.
Buffy stood up and turned in a full circle, while scanning the vast white plane around her for anything, as the wall she had been leaning against suddenly dissipated back into the nothingness that had spawned it.
And when she saw what was there, she blinked and replied with “Ok, nice big fire birdie.”
The gigantic bird made of pink fire seemed to sigh as it shook itself. “You… uhg…. Buffy Summers, I really don’t know how or even why it is that every time you die you end up here, however temporary your stay may be, nor do I know if I even wish to know, but… it is somewhat of a boon to me at the moment.”
Now Buffy was nobody’s fool, and she could tell that the beginnings of a desperate sales pitch was going to be made to her via proxy by her old friends Fate and Destiny yet again and after a very small sigh she asked “Ok Mister Fire Bird, what’s the deal here and who do I have to kill this time?”
The giant pink bird made of fire seemed to blink and then stated “My name, or rather my title since I have no true name as it were Miss Summers, is The Phoenix Force. And I don’t actually don’t have a target for you to kill, but rather I have something for you do and protect.”
“And what would that be?” Buffy then asked of the Phoenix.
The Phoenix sighed and then told Buffy “First, I think I need to give you a little bit of the back story as it were, so, please, bear with me here for a moment. This is my home that you are currently residing in. It is called by many names, but the one that the current wielders of its current physical manifestation know it as is the M’Kraan Crystal. I am its guardian, and I am charged with seeing that none misuse its vast power, for it has the power to modify reality itself if the user of it knows exactly what they are doing with it. It has been for the last three hundred and five years in the charge of a galaxy spanning empire, one that has had nothing but the upmost respect and fear for what it could do in the wrong hands and they have allowed nobody and no-one besides the ruler of their empire to even touch it, and every ruler in the past has taken a vow to never to use it for the fear of misusing it.”
Buffy then butted into the explanation with “Let me guess, things have changed?”
The Phoenix nodded and then replied “Yes, there is now a new ruler for the Shi-ar Empire, and he is, well, he is quite frankly insane.” The Phoenix said with a shake of its head. “Honestly, I just don’t know… ah…” The Phoenix then sighed again and continued on with “Well, his sister, when he decided to break the most solemn vow of never using the M’Kraan Crystal for the fear of misusing it, assaulted her brother and stole the crystal and fled the palace, and then the Shi-ar Empire itself. And now she’s almost to Earth and her ship is in, well, it’s in bad shape and the forces that her brother set to retrieve her and the crystal are close behind her.”
“Well, shit.” Buffy sighed out.
“And now on to even more troubling news, well for you at least. The M’Kraan Crystal’s physical manifestation is currently not in your native and home reality, but in a vastly different one, although it was briefly travelling through your reality the first time you came here. Anyways, the fact is, this is not the Earth that you know of that will soon be involved in this conflict, and so if you say no to my proposition, then you need not worry about the Earth of your reality being affected by any of this.”
Buffy looked up at the big bird made of pink fire and said “Well, while I appreciate you being honest and forthright with me, can you stop with the theatrics and just make your damn sales pitch now?”
The Phoenix blinked again and then said “Fine. I am the guardian of this crystal, but I have no physical form outside of it. I am a being of pure, cosmic energy, and as such I need a host to work through to affect anything outside of this crystal, and I wish for you to be that host for me. Many times have you come in here in the past, and the crystal responds to your will almost as easily as my own while you are here, that, and from the things that I have overheard you say during you during your brief stays within this place leads me to believe that you would be an excellent host and treat the powers that being my host would bring responsibly.”
“Ok, and the bad news now please?” Buffy asked.
“The bad news, as you put it is two-fold. Part one is that you would be bonded to both me and the crystal for the rest of your life, although two of the ‘bad parts’ of that already seem to be in place, as one, you already seem to be bonded to the crystal in some way, and two, well, um, you already seem to reincarnate yourself after you die, which would be one of the powers which you would be receiving from me. But two and probably more important is that you would be stuck within this reality, well until such a time that you learn to breach the walls of reality with both mine and the crystal’s power.”
Buffy then blinked and slowly asked “Ok, so you want to have me ‘host’ you, so that we can then leave this crystal, kick some insanely evil and evilly insane galactic Emperor’s butt, and in the process, I’ll gain a shit ton of power from you and if I’m reading this right get control of this M’Kraan Crystal and become it’s like, one true owner?”
The Phoenix blinked yet again, and let me tell you, seeing a giant bird made of pink fire blinking once in surprise and confusion is incredible, but this many times? As they say in those commercials, priceless. Then the Phoenix said “Um, yes, that sounds about right, but not how I would have put it though.”
Buffy then grinned and said, “Well then, sign me up.”
If a giant bird made of cosmic, and pink, can’t forget the pink, fire could face fault, or even knew what that was, it would have done so at this moment. “Um, not to question my good fortune at the moment, but I really thought it would have been harder to get you to agree to abandon your old reality to help save this one.”
Buffy then smirked and then told the Phoenix Force “Phoenix, I can call you that can’t I? Well Phoenix, you see, in helping you I gain my own freedom. I’m pretty much a slave to the Powers That Be in my home dimension, the PTB’s are kinda like God’s, um, janitorial service, they make sure that my home universe is kept clean and tidy. And after I somehow became sorta immortal, they, um, well, I won’t go into it other than to say that that if I never have to go back there and deal with them, then it’s all of the good. So let’s do this so I can get on with a new life.”
“Ok then.” The Phoenix said after a mental short-circuit, while also vowing that its new host would never have to answer to these Powers That Be again, and said “Prepare yourself then Buffy.”
EAN1: Ok, here’s the prologue, and keep in mind that this is at its heart just supposed to be a light hearted and silly romp, but sadly, if I know myself at all, it will eventually and sadly turn serious later on. Sigh. But for now inaneness abounds and I hope you enjoyed this, thanks for reading this, bye for now.
EAN2: I am actually working on chapter one right now, so hopefully it will be up soon.