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For God's Sake!

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Summary: Xander is captured—again. He’s being snarky with the bad guys—again. But what happens after the rescue? Slash: Spike/Xander/Riddick. ON HOLD. RE-WRITE IN PROGRESS.

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
Harry Potter > Xander-Centered
Movies > Pitch Black Series
Television > Xena-Hercules
CorruptedSmileFR181225,27038629,43315 Apr 1022 May 11No

NOTE: This chapter is rated FR13

To Xander's Rescue!

Disclaimer: I don’t own anything you recognise and I’m not making any money from writing this fictive story. The stuff you don't recognise . . . Well, those are probably mine. All characters I borrowed, will be returned to their respective owners . . . when the time has come.

‘Buffy: the Vampire Slayer’ belongs to Joss Whedon and others. ‘Harry Potter’ belongs to J.K. Rowling and others. ‘Supernatural’ belongs to Eric Kripke and others. ‘The Chronicles of Riddick: Escape from Butcher Bay’ belongs to Tom Keegan and others.

Crossover: B:tVS/SPN/HP/CoR

Rating: FR13, because of the use of bad words. Yes, this means swearing. And allusions to slashy situations.

Pairing: Xander/Spike/Riddick

Prequel to: Who Has The Better Growl?

Spoilers: Spoilers for all seasons of Buffy and until book six of Harry Potter as Voldemort has not yet been defeated.

Summary: Xander is captured — again. He’s being snarky with the bad guys — again. But what happens after the rescue?

Story: For Gods' Sake

Chapter One: To Xander's Rescue!

Sitting In The Living Room Of The Council Building

They rolled their eyes at the two growling males who were seemingly doing their very best to drive them all nuts with their pacing.

Finally Buffy couldn’t take it anymore. “Would you two stop with the pacing already?! You’re driving me nuts doing that!”

Both males looked at the blonde, distaste clear on their faces. But while Spike sneered at the blonde, Riddick didn’t even give her a second glance.

“Boys, play nice. Xander wouldn’t want you two to act like this,” Dawn said, trying the calm everyone down. Both men glared at her for the boys comment, but she didn’t let that deter her. “We know you want Xander back, but so do we. He’s not just your friend, you know.”

“What was he doing there, anyway?! What kind of idiot would send Xander on a mission all by himself? That’s just asking for trouble!” Spiked spat angrily, not able to disguise his concern for Xander’s well-being.

Giles coughed, shifted in his seat and started to clean his glasses. “That’s neither here nor there. We need to concentrate on finding Xander.”

With those words, everyone turned to look at Willow. Looking up, she snorted in a very un-lady-like manner. “Way to not put pressure on me, guys. You know I’m narrowing down the places he could be at. It takes time, you know. He could be anywhere by now.”


After another ten minutes of fruitless waiting, Spike and Riddick suddenly grabbed their left shoulder and groaned. As they both straightened up, the others could see the change that had come over them. They both looked even more feral than they normally did. Spike’s normally blue eyes had turned completely golden, while Riddick’s silver ones were shining with an inner light that couldn't normally be found in them.

As one the two growled lowly, menacingly. The others in the room shivered. All were suddenly very glad that these two men were on their side.

Turning his head, Spike smirked — showing his elongated fangs to everyone in the room. “We know where he is.”

“Where who's at?” Andrew asked stupidly.

Everyone sighed deeply at the question and rolled their eyes at their closest neighbour. Well, everyone but Spike and Riddick did so, anyway. The latter two only growled at the young man's stupid question which made Andrew squeak and duck behind Buffy as if she could hide his larger form from the two men.

“Xander, you idiot! Who else?!” Buffy hissed at the cowering Andrew. Really, and people thought she was slow on the uptake sometimes. Compared to Andrew, she was a regular Willow!

“Enough with the chitchat, slayer. We need to move!” Spike said loudly, interrupting her inner conversation with herself.

And as if those words were the magical ones, a mad scramble began to get the rescue teams together. The end result was four teams — each one consisting of a magic user and a couple of people who had the brute strength that might be needed to get things done.

The first team consisted of Giles, Buffy and fifteen of the more experienced SITs. The second team consisted of Willow, Faith and another fifteen SITs. The third team consisted of one escaped convict from outer space and one (ex-)evil vampire. The last team was the Fang Gang — who had been hastily called and transported magically in order to help with the rescue mission.

The mission? Spike and Riddick would go and find Xander and free him — and any others that might be where they found him. They had even gotten a few magical ‘doodads’ — thanks to Willow — to help them get Xander free. The other three teams would cover their backs. There was no doubt in their minds that Xander would be surrounded by the worst of the worst. Well, maybe not as bad as the Scourge of Europe, but still — bad enough. That was just Xander’s kind of luck.


Outside Of The Place Where Xander Is Being Held Captive

After a few loud fights — behind silencing wards — they had decided on a plan of action. Instead of simply breaking down the door and bursting in, three teams were going to sneak in and scout the rooms one by one — rounding up everyone who wasn’t one of theirs. Willow had told them that the place smelled of dark magic — reason enough to capture all people — or possibly non-people — there to question them at a later time. They would do that until someone was able to sound an alarm — then all hell would break loose. In the mean time the last team — consisting of only Spike and Riddick — would go off on their own to find and free Xander.

“Got those magical thingies Willow gave you?” Buffy asked them quietly.

After checking one of the many pockets his coat seemed to have, Spike nodded.

“And all the crap needed in case Xander’s wounded?” she asked again.

This time Riddick checked his pocket and nodded.

“Good,” Giles said, having overheard the conversation between the three.

Turning around, he caught everyone’s attention. Well, all except for Willow — she was busily working on destroying the wards surrounding the place. “Willow’s locating spell has showed us that Xander is being held underground, probably in some kind of dungeons. The minute we get through these wards, we’ll split up. Spike and Riddick will go get him, while the rest of us start to scout the house. The objective is to capture as many people — who are suspected of being involved with this dark magic — as possible.” At this, everyone nodded to show they had heard him. Only the bravest rolled their eyes at hearing the plan for the nth time.

A whispered exclamation from Willow and the fading flicker of the wards were their signal for splitting up. Spike and Riddick settled into a quick but silent run. Each man was hoping to find Xander in one piece — and preferably alive and well. The others followed them at a more sedate pace.


The two men silently opened one of the windows, slipped inside and crouched down in the dark hallway. Seeing and hearing nothing out of the ordinary, they stood up and silently made their way to the stairs. The sound of muffled footsteps was the only sound people would have heard if their environment would have been absolutely silent. As there was no absolute silence, the two guards, who had been standing with their backs to them, didn’t even have the time to turn around before they were grabbed, knocked out and tied up.

Spike and Riddick grinned at each other viciously. There was absolutely no better way of spending your time than by beating up the bad guys. Suddenly a whisper and a smell caught their attention, making their eyes flash. Both growled lowly and stalked to the door leading to the place that had captured their attention.


How Spike, Riddick And Xander Look At Things

Kicking in the door, Spike drew a deep breath — that wasn’t technically needed — burst in the room and yelled at Xander, “You’re not going anywhere without us ever again, whelp!” Riddick growled lowly to show that he agreed with his vampire lover.

“But —” Xander said.

“No!” Spike yelled, interrupting him. “I don’t want to hear about how this wasn’t your fault. It’s never your fault, yet you still end up being the one kidnapped and/or tortured. I have had it up to here with your bad luck! You are never leaving the Council Building alone again — ever . Do I make myself clear?” He glared at Xander. And even though Xander meekly nodded at what Spike had just said, he still tried to get his other lover on his side.

“Riddick?” Xander asked, a pleading look on his face.

“The vamp has a point. A good point,” Riddick said gruffly, not falling for the cute look on Xander’s face.

“But I don’t mean to get kidnapped,” Xander said, pouting lightly. “It just happens.”

“Xan,” Spike said, rolling his eyes. “You’re even worse than Dawn. She only gets kidnapped on Tuesday afternoons. You get kidnapped on all days of the weeks and at the oddest of hours.”

Xander couldn’t argue with that logic, because, well, it was true. That didn’t mean he had to like it, though.


“Why were you near this dump, anyway?” Spike asked, now looking confused at his lover.

“Giles sent me,” Xander answered, looking surprised. At the growls coming from his lovers, he backed up a bit. “I take it Giles didn’t mention that to you guys?” The twin glares he got at that question gave him the answer he had been looking for. A very definite and resounding hell no.

“We will have to have a word with that watcher,” Riddick said gruffly, growling at the thought of the watcher risking Xander's life. Spike nodded in agreement, eyes flashing at the thought of what they could do to Giles when the time had come.

“But first we’re getting out of here,” Spike said, grabbing Xander by the arm and pulling him towards the door. Riddick took up the rear, because you could never play it too safely when Xander was around.


“Joy. Back to the mother hens who will hover over me like — some really hover-y thing.” Xander groaned. “Do you have any idea what Buffy and Willow will do? Or even Dawn and Faith. And Giles.” He whimpered. “I’m doomed.”

“You’re not doomed.” Spike smirked over his shoulder at his lover. “But you will be sorry for worrying everyone.”

“Why is Dawn even allowed to worry about me?” Xander complained. “It’s not right. She gets kidnapped almost as often as me.”

“Key word being almost,” Riddick answered him while walking up the stairs at a steady pace. “Besides, are you going to be the one to tell her that she can’t worry about you?”

Xander looked up at him — a scared look on his face — and quickly shook his head.

“Thought so,” Riddick said, smirking at his lover.

“Wuss,” Spike said affectionately to Xander.

“Like you would tell her something like that,” Xander said, snickering. Spike glared at him for daring to make it seem as if he was afraid of a teenage girl not even a quarter of his age. Because he wasn’t — he just knew all about strategic retreats in favour of gaining something else he wanted.

“We weren’t talking about me, were we?” Spike pointed out to him.

Xander rolled his eyes at that. There was no point in calling either of his lovers a wuss, because they would deny that they were until their dying day. Or final death day in Spike’s case.

End Chapter One.

A/N: I'm so happy people are interested in this pairing. I definitely didn't set out to write more than the one-shot Who Has The Better Growl? — but, well, I seem to be not so very good at letting my stories continue to stay a one-shot.

WARNING: Flames should be kept leashed at all times. I am not responsible for what will happen to them if let free in my vicinity.

That being said, reviews that give me constructive criticism or a simple well-done/loved the chapter/etc. are very much welcomed.
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