***Help Wanted: I am currently looking for one or more beta readers, potentially even coauthors (in general, not for this story specifically). If you are interested, please send me a message, and be sure to include the fandoms that you are most familiar with - almost everything I write will be a crossover of some type, so I am looking for people with wide familiarity, especially for the five principal fandoms listed in my profile. That being said, I will consider any application I get. Please also link to site(s) where you have posted work in the fandoms applied for, especially if applying to be a coauthor
Standard disclaimer applies; I only own my DVD collection and my imagination, but not the characters or original universes. Many thanks to the brilliant minds who came up with such wonderful stories and characters to play with. No profit, or compensation of any kind, will ever be earned from this story, with the exception of whatever reviews you wish to leave. This is complete and stands alone, completely separate from all my other works.Spoilers:
Stargate SG-1: General Season 9 & 10. If you know the team from those two seasons, and the major villain, you're fine. Vala is not directly mentioned, but she could either be there or not, your choice.Warning:
This is fairly blatantly a Crack!fic, at least based on my understanding of the term. It just came into my head and wouldn't go away. I actually wrote it at the tail end of last summer, just never got around to posting it until now.Credit:
I got this idea from a minor detail in Chapter 16 "Still I Rise"
of Ava's story "Odds and Ends" at Twisting the Hellmouth (a collection of her "drabbles and ficlets written for the FFA or just for fun," as quoted from her summary). Although I got the idea from it, this is otherwise completely unrelated to her ficlet. Posted with her permission though, and I would recommend reading her excellent works anyway, even if they are not necessary to understand this.
Buffy was on her first mission accompanying SG-1. It was supposed to be a nice quiet mission, to get her used to gate travel. Of course, that hadn't turned out to be the case. Some guy with a freaky staff had come through the gate after they had, and they were hiding. Why, she had no idea. But here they were, watching the guy drone on and on about Origin. She was mostly tuning him out, but would occasionally listen in to stem the boredom. Ah, finally, he seemed to be finishing up. Maybe now the team would let her kill him/it.
"Hallowed are the Ori," the guy said.
OK, that was it. Now he definitely needed to be slain. Letting loose a colossal scream, she burst forth from their hiding place and tackled the startled staff dude. Someone behind her was yelling something about prior. She idly wondered what that was about, but quickly decided that pounding the guy she had pinned was more important.
She kept pounding away, eventually stopping once she realized that her victim was unconscious and thus failing to appreciate her wrath.
"Buffy," Daniel said, somewhat hesitantly, "what was that all about?"
She looked at him like he'd grown a third head. "He was obviously evil. I mean to do what he was talking about would be to commit sacrilege. I mean, take out the filling and there's practically nothing left," she explained.
Teal'c tilted his head somewhat to the side and did that eyebrow thing that she was beginning to suspect he did on a fairly regular basis. Cam just looked confused. Sam asked her, "Buffy, what did he say that made you so angry?"
Now Buffy gave her a strange look. "What do you think? That last statement he made proved his evilness pretty clearly, I thought."
Seeing Sam's expression just grow more confused, she sighed, and repeated what she'd heard.
"Hollowed are the Oreos?"