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Yub Yub Commander

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Summary: My friend wanted me to write a Star Wars cross. Her Requirements: no Jedi, no standard relationships and no Xander the Hutt. Xander gets some people to dress up as a memorial to Jesse. SG1 eventually.

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
Star Wars > Multiple Pairings
Stargate > General > Team: SG-1 Seasons(s) 1-5
DireSquirrelFR15625,2471916228,52113 May 1016 Aug 11No

Spike, Droids, and other Declarations

Yub, Yub, Commander!



The origin of this fic is from an online conversation with my good friend, Space Mary. Copied below is an except from said conversation, edited slightly to represent my response time to certain questions:

SpaceMary: you owe me a favor.
DireSquirrel: Okay, shoot.
SpaceMary: i want you to write me a fic
DireSquirrel: you sure about that?
SpaceMary: Yes
DireSquirrel: what about?
SpaceMary: Halloween fic, but a different one
DireSquirrel: I already did one of those.
DireSquirrel: I did Slayers.
SpaceMary: How about Star Wars?



DireSquirrel: Okay, I guess, but “Xander as a Jedi” has been done.
SpaceMary: dn’t make anyone a jedi
DireSquirrel: Cool, smugglers or fighter pilots right? Space Princesses? Droids? Xander the Hutt?
SpaceMary: DON’TR YOU DARE!!!!!1
SpaceMary: But I don’t want any standard romance, but I do want romance.
DireSquirrel: you know I such
DireSquirrel: *suck at writing romance, that’s why I don’t do it.
SpaceMary: please
SpaceMary: ?’ you owe me
SpaceMary: a lot

DireSquirrel: okay, fine
SpaceMary: excpt willow/tara, i like them
DireSquirrel: What else?
SpaceMary: I want a big cast
DireSquirrel: I’m not doing a very long one, but a short one, five, six chapters at the most, not too many characters can really shine in a small fic with a big cast
SpaceMary: No ficlets, but not too long id
SpaceMary: *is fine
DireSquirrel: not a problem, I’ve already got an idea
SpaceMary: Why does that scare me?”
DireSquirrel: because you’ve known me for a long time? Don’t forget you’re the one who asked me to do this


Later, SpaceMary would read the first chapter. This was her response:

SpaceMary: i hate you.
DireSquirrel: but this makes us even right? We had a deal? One favor, one fic? Right? Right?


SpaceMary, if you’re reading, this, I’m really, really, sorry, but everyone needs to know this isn’t my fault. You planted the idea in my head, so you can take the blame.



“Well, since thanks to Snyder we can’t just hang out anymore for Halloween, I was thinking…” Xander said, trailing off a little. He paused just long enough for Willow to know he had an idea, specifically an idea that she wasn’t going to like.

“What?” she asked. It was always better to get him to just go right out and say it. It usually caused less mental anguish in the end. Never none, but it frequently cushioned the blow.

“I just thought that this is the first Halloween that Jesse isn’t going to be here with us,” Xander said. “And I thought that, to honor him, maybe we could…I don’t know…maybe we could go with one of his group costume ideas.”

“Xander, they were always bad ideas,” Willow said. Goodness knows, Jesse was like a brother to her and Xander, but well, he was like a brother to Willow and Xander. That meant they were able to be honest about each other’s flaws, and occasionally beat each other up without any hard feelings (or even frequently beat each other up for fun, depending on the week). Jesse always had a warped sense of cool, even Willow and Xander knew that. Sometimes what passed for Jesse’s personal preference could warp and horrify even the geekiest of geeks.

“It has to be better than going as a ghost again…” Xander said teasingly. “And we could get some others to take part, too. You know, to honor Jesse’s memory.”

Willow stared at him for a long moment. “Xander…you are a horrible manipulative person.”

“So you’ll do it?”

“… … …yes…”

“Yay!”



“Hey Buff,” Xander said in an overly cheerful voice. Buffy cringed as her Slayer Sense started tingling in that oh-no-something-bad-is-coming way.

“Hey Xander, what’s up?”

“Oh, Willow and I were going to dress up together and we were wondering if you’d like to take part,” Xander said. “It’s to honor Jesse. It’s the first Halloween without him.”

“Awe, I’m sorry,” Buffy said. “I keep forgetting how much he meant to you.”

“It’s not your fault,” Xander said. “I mean, it’s not like you knew him real well. He died just after you got here and then got turned and all that. It’s not that big a deal.”

“Look, just because I didn’t know him well doesn’t mean I don’t care about you guys,” Buffy said with a sympathetic look. “I’d be honored to take part.”

“Thanks Buff,” Xander said. “That means a lot.”



“What are you moping about, Lame-o?” Cordelia Chase bluntly inquired in her usual arrogant manner. Xander looked up with a very sad (and very fake) expression on his face.

“It’s the first Halloween without Jesse,” he said in a tone just sad enough to be believable, and not to heavy so as to sound like depression. Cordelia knew something was wrong. Everyone knew she didn’t like hearing about her stalkers. But this, this was almost like a sixth sense telling her there was something was extraordinarily dangerous about continuing the conversation. Cordy decided to go her usual route: rudeness.

“So?”

“He-he really liked Halloween,” Xander said. “He had all these ideas, and now, well, now he won’t be able to do any of them. I just, I just wish that more people would, just this Halloween, follow one of his ideas.”

Neither one heard anything, but if they had been paying attention, they would have heard one single voice in the background say: “Done.”

“Okay, fine, I’ll do it,” Cordy said. “But you better believe I’m not suffering alone! And I don’t do comic books! No superheroes or tights or primary colors or underwear on the outside! Not happening!”

“Oh, that’s fine,” Xander said, abruptly feeling better about it all. “Maybe you could recruit some more people so you won’t suffer alone?”

“That’s a good idea,” Cordelia said. “If I make the plans it doesn’t look like I’m suffering, just making them suffer.”

“Great! I’ll order the costumes, but everybody has to buy their own,” Xander said.

“Oh, that won’t be a problem,” Cordy said with an evil grin.




Ethan’s Costume Shop, later on.

“You want how many of these?” Ethan asked the teen with an utterly confused look. Xander told him the number and nodded eagerly.

“With some variation in the characters, we don’t want any repeats,” Xander said. “It’s in honor of a friend who died last year.”

“Oh, well in that case, I’ll double my efforts,” Ethan replied with a smile that seemed a little…mean. “I can promise you this will be a Halloween to remember forever.”

“Thanks, that’s exactly what I’m looking for!”

“They’ll be ready the day before Halloween,” Ethan promised. “I’ll even cut you a deal.”

“You sir, are a scholar and a gentleman,” Xander said with a grin of thanks. Ethan smirked as the boy ran out the front door.

“Oh, if you only knew child,” Ethan said. “If you only knew.”



Later, Harmony Kendall discovered that she needed to buy a whole bunch of costumes with her Daddy’s credit card. She didn’t even know what the costumes were, but they were cute. Maybe Cordelia’s idea of Go-As-A-Geek plan was going to be cool. At least they weren’t going as Trekkies, cuz unitards are just so…ugh! Well, the go-go boots are okay, but only for special occasions.

The nice British man helped her load up the car and off she went to where the whole group was dressing up: The Sunnydale High Library.

Willow should have known what to expect. Buffy should have had an inkling at least. Cordy had her suspicions, but wasn’t ready for the real thing.

“You-you want us to dress up as EWOKS?!?” Cordelia yelled at the top of her lungs.

“It was Jesse’s idea,” Xander said pitifully. “And you did promise.”

“Fine!” Cordy said, stomping to the stacks to change with the Cordettes.

“Am I the only one who thinks it’s a little weird that Cordelia knows what an Ewok is?” Amy asked, raising her hand.

“No, you’re not the only one,” commented Jenny Calendar. “I guess I’ll go try it on for tomorrow.”

“Xander, why did you procure one for me?” Giles asked.

“Not just you,” Xander said. “Miss Calendar, Joyce and you. You said nothing happens on Halloween anyways, so why not try a little extra and be wild?”

“You got one for mom?” Buffy asked.

“Why not? The more the merrier!”



Aura was not pleased. “Cordy, when you said you’d pick the costumes, you didn’t say you’d let Xander “Manure-For-Fashion™” Harris pick the costumes.”

“I promised, he guilted me into it,” Cordy replied.

“I think they’re cute,” Harmony said. “It’s like we’re all a bunch of cuddly teddy bears. Not as cute as unicorns, but pretty cute.”

“And thank you Harmony for the five year old response,” said Aphrodesia.

“I’m not five years old, I’m sixteen!”

“I was referring to your mental age,” she replied.

“Cordy! She’s being mean to me again!”

“Then stay away from her! And stop acting like I’m your mother!”



“Here you go Dawnie,” Xander said, handing the girl a costume. “Your character is Winda Warrick.” He turned to her mother and handed Joyce a similar package. “Joyce, you’re Shodu Warrick, healer and mother figure.”

“Xander, are you really sure about this? I’m a little old for a costume like this,” Joyce said. “And I was never as into Star Wars as Hank was.”

“Dad liked Star Wars?” Dawn asked as if it was a revelation of galactic surprise.

“Yes, he forced me to see all three movies in the theaters,” Joyce said. “He even dressed up for the third one and had Buffy dress up as a little Princess Leia. She was about two at the time.”

“And that’s something I never knew about Dad,” Dawn Summers said. “Not too sure how to process that. Also, I want pictures.”

“Simple costume change will do you some good,” Xander said. “I’ll go hand these out.”

“Who’s Chief Chirpa?” Joyce asked.

“Oh, I don’t think anyone,” Xander said. “Cordy’s going as Princess Kneesaa, his daughter though. She’d kill me if she went as anyone less than royalty after getting her into this.”

“She’d better not,” Buffy said, coming down the stairs in full Ewok regalia. “Who am I supposed to be?”

“Paploo, a Ewok so awesome that he-er-she stole a speeder bike and learned how to drive it in almost no time,” Xander said. Buffy squinted, hoping she hadn’t misheard him, but hey, who can tell genders on an Ewok? Xander handed her a plastic model of a 74-z speeder bike. “This was Jesse’s. His mother gave it to me after what happened.”

“Thanks,” Buffy said, looking at the obscure object in her hand, “I think. What are you going as?”

“Lieutenant Kettch, Ewok X-Wing pilot and mascot of Wraith Squadron,” was Xander’s quick reply. “A semi-fictional character who was thought up as a joke. I’m taking it back and living the legend.”

“Xander! They’re all fictional characters,” chided Willow from the stairs, miraculously not dressed as a ghost. She was instead dressed as Asha, a red haired woman Ewok warrior.

“What about Giles?” Buffy asked.

“Logray, the mystical leader and second to Chief Chirpa,” Xander said.

“You have every costume with a background and everything, don’t you?” Joyce asked with a bemused smile.

“Jesse did all the hard work, I just printed them out and included a few extra with each costume,” Xander said. “It’s how he would have wanted it.”

“How do you even remember all these little facts? In History class you couldn’t even remember when the War of 1812 started!” Willow said with a pout. She crossed her now furry arms and glared.

“Hey, if history was half as interesting, I’m sure I’d remember it,” Xander said.



Halloween night started out normal with everyone walking about as Ewoks, herding kids like cattle and giving advice to all their charges.

In Ethan’s Costume Shop, Ethan Rayne was making sure this would be a Halloween to remember.

Show time!



Spike walked through the area, having been informed that the Slayer was going to be small tonight by his dead-and-walking lady love Drusilla. He and a few new minions, including about five Draculas, three “living” vampires, and a stupid White Wolf Tremere (they were all just bloody irritating), the master vampire started hunting down the Slayer.

But Halloween wasn’t like a normal Halloween. No; chaos, murder, mob mentality and general lawlessness was rampant through the town. Spike just looked around and grinned.

“Well this is just…neat!”

His amusement was not long lasting, however. He was cut off by an Ewok on an honest-to-goodness hover bike that threatened to careen out of control. He was then nearly trampled by about twelve other members of the species, all wielding stone and wooden weapons as they chased after the speeder bike.

“Not something you see every day, that,” Spike said in amazement. He noticed the light go out on the street. Glancing up, he realize the light was just blocked by your standard AT-ST walker that was making its way down Sunnydale’s main street in a jagged, drunken fashion. As it passed by, a wookie with a bandoleer of thermal detonators chased after it, bellowing out something the vampire couldn’t understand.

“Bloody hell! I haven’t had a trip this good since I ate that bird at Woodstock!” Spike said with a slightly demented grin on his face. Sitting on a bench to enjoy the show he was quickly accosted by C-3PO and R2-D2.

“Excuse me sir,” said the ever polite droid, “But have you see our companions? They are short, furry and like to stab things with stone spears.”

“They went that way, mate,” Spike said. The shorter droid Beeped and Booped a little. The taller droid gave it a whack to the back of the “skull”

“How rude! I cannot believe you just said that to someone you just met!” Threepio said, obviously embarrassed. “I’m sorry, sir, but my companion had a bit of an attitude problem.”

“No worries,” Spike said, waving them off. The two droids shuffled down the street after the Ewoks. “Best bloody trip ever. Who did I eat last? Should have saved some for Dru.”



Aside from discovering his sudden change in sex, Paploo was having a wonderful time. He used to be male, but now he found himself in a quite clearly female body. He was also in a very strange land. The trees were small, and the ground houses were very large and colorful. But best of all, Paploo had her speeder bike back.

The old bike had crashed after a mishap involving an AT-ST, two of the white armored humans and a large vat of liquefied dung. It was good to be back.

“It looked like the empire is trying to invade,” Paploo said to herself as she buzzed around a corner. “Although I never knew Stormtroopers that tripped over sidewalks.”

-==-

Warren Mears had dressed up in a Storm Trooper costume he bought from Party Town. It had been fine up until a little while ago when his robot girlfriend (who was wearing a Xena costume he bought from Ethan’s) had jumped up and started decapitating what looked like demons and started cackling in ancient greek. He didn’t understand a word.

Otherwise Halloween was pretty good. He took a break from shepherding the kids around and sat down on a bench that looked down the main drag. He noticed something headed towards him at a very high rate of speed.

“Oh, my god! Is that a speeder bike? That is the best Paploo costume ever!” Warren yelled, jumping to his feet. Unfortunately for him, he was holding his replica Imperial Blaster in his hands. The tip of the speeder glowed for a second before shooting out a green blast of energy. Warren’s eyes went wide as he stared dumbfounded at the remains of the bench he was sitting on just a moment before. He was very lucky Paploo had bad aim. “Oh, shit!”

Warren wisely ran into an alleyway. It would have helped if he had been up against someone in a car or a motorbike. The sad reality is that hover bikes, well, hover and can nearly fly for short distances. The 74-Z could go up to 25 meters, much more than the average Sunnydale building. By the time Warren reached the other side, Paploo was waiting for him.

Panicking, Warren wrenched off his helmet and tossed it aside.

“It’s just a costume! I give up!”

Paploo said something, but Warren couldn’t hear it over the hum of the Speeder bike’s engine. It might have been “yub, yub.”



Closer to Sunnydale High School, Logray and his fellow mystic Kaink were dealing with a different problem. There were big metal demons moving all over the place. Naughty metal demons with their rolling legs and light up eyes. Teaming up, Kaink used her magic staff to blow one of them sky high. Logray, well versed in the magical arts of the Force, lifted one of the demons and threw it unceremoniously on top of the large building of learning. They quickly realized there were move of the demons around, but seemed to be sleeping, so the two mystics paid them no mind. It was time to find the youth of the Bright Tree Village and find some way to return to their forest home.

This new world was very strange. Both Logray and Kaink felt much younger than they should have been, decades younger. It was strange to have such vast levels of experience and yet live in such inexperienced bodies. The dichotomy was intriguing.

He could hear a commotion from not far away, perhaps just on the other side of those strangely large buildings. Indeed, he could see young Paploo on her speeder bike pointing at a human in white stormtrooper armor. He was waving his hands as if to surrender. He was also a little short for a stormtrooper.

As he and Kaink marched across the strange ground (it was black and grey with yellow and white lines drawn on it; humans were so strange) a number of other Ewoks arrived through a space between the human buildings.

“Paploo, what is going on?”

“I have caught a Stormtrooper,” Paploo responded. “He can tell us many things.”

“But you can not speak the language of the Empire,” Kaink mentioned incredulously. “Only the Golden One can truly translate between our peoples.”

“I do not know if the Golden One is with us,” Paploo said.

“I have seen him,” announced a freshly arrive Princess Kneesaa. “He is with the slow round one.”

“I’ll find him,” volunteered Wicket, brandishing his spear and running off in the direction in which they came.

Wicket was considered to be one of the bravest scouts of the Bright Tree Village. It was he who made friends with the humans who helped save the village from the Evil Empire and who negotiated the peace treaty with some of the other intelligent inhabitants of the forest moon of Endor.

Wicket found the Golden One marching down the road at his usual slow pace. For a god he was very slow.

“Golden One! Princess Kneesaa and Logray need your help in interrogating a prisoner,” Wicket announced. The Golden One’s short, blue and white companion trilled a question.

“No, I don’t think this is Endor,” the Golden One replied to his friend. “Yes, investigating the location is very important. Why don’t we ask the prisoner for the location of a data port?” Artoo trilled his agreement and soon enough the trio were back to the rest of the Ewoks from Bright Tree Village.



Spike was having the time of his unlife. This had to be the greatest Halloween ever. He was having such a great time hanging with a Wendigo pair, helping eviscerate kids with tiny red demons and even draining the blood from some adults for some really wicked rituals (some of which he’d never seen before) that he entirely forgot about the Slayer become small and Dru’s prophesy. He didn’t however, forget about Dru. He got a camera and videotaped the whole thing.

“Dru, love, this here bird calls herself Alice,” Spike said, holding up a young blonde teen who was indeed trussed up like the eponymous character from Lewis Carroll’s famous work. “I’m bringing her home a bit later and we can see if she really can do all those impossible things before breakfast.”

He tossed the girl to some of his minions who delighted in hauling her back to their lair. Spike then panned around so his sire could get a good view of the carnage. “Bloody Hell Dru, haven’t seen anything quite like this since I did that Slayer back during the Boxer Rebellion. Whoever arranged this was bloody brilliant!”

Spike then went on to detail the specifics on some of the night’s events of murder and mayhem. “Oh, and I know how much you like Jedi, so I thought I’d mention there’s a whole bunch of Ewoks running around waving spears and such. Saw Threepio and Artoo around here too. At first I thought I was just tripping like back at Woodstock, but it’s bloody real!”

Spike moved over and picked up another present he picked up for her: a child sized Godzilla that actually had radiation breath and the whole deal. “Got a pet. Might not have a model of Tokyo Tower for a scratching post, but mini-Gojira here is gonna be great. I didn’t even know these guys were real! Wonder if she’ll grow to full size?”

“Well, Dru, I’m on my way back so we can head out on the town for real! You’ll love it!”



Warren was surrounded by Ewoks. These weren’t costumes, but flesh and blood Ewoks with nasty sharp pointy sticks. And about twelve of those pointy sticks were very close to his unprotected neck. When they started getting excited about something, he didn’t dare turn around to see what they were looking at, but whatever it was, it must be important.

“Oh dear, a stormtrooper,” said a clipped British accent behind him. He knew that accent.

“It’s just a costume,” Warren said. “I’m not really a storm trooper. My gun is plastic, see for yourself.”

“Oh it is,” said the voice from behind him. The same voice then spoke in another language. “Ook! Wah oopa Kuut!”

With those words, the spears almost instantly left his throat. Warren rubbed his neck and turned around to see the face of his savior. “HOLY MARY MOTHER OF GOD! C-3PO? R2-D2? How is this possible? You’re not just a costume-you-you’re real!”

“You know who we are? Odd, because we have never met you before,” the golden droid commented, a little confused at the situation.

“But-you-how can you be here? What’s going on?” Warren asked, more than a little confused. The taller droid was about to respond, but his shorter companion trilled and beeped.

“Yes, a dataport is a priority,” Threepio commented. “Young man, you wouldn’t happen to know where we could connect to a data port, would you?”

“Uh, dataport, well, the high school has a connection to the internet, maybe that could help?”

Artoo beeped in agreement.

“Oh, great, I’ll show you,” Warren said, walking towards Sunnydale High. “And uh, if it isn’t too much trouble, would you mind letting me get a copy of your programming? I’m working on droids myself, but the programming is…well, you guys are so far beyond anything I can build. I just want to get to the next step.”

Threepio turned to his companion who trilled in response. “My companion says that would be a fair trade for the use of your dataport.”

“Oh, wow, that, that would be awesome,” Warren said. “Now I just need to make space on, well, I’ll just have to use the school’s server. And maybe link some of the computers to…” he yammered away, muttering about what exactly he would need.

Asha leaned over to another warrior and whispered in his ear. “Can’t we just kill it and get on with it?”

The warrior shook his head. “No, the Golden One has spoken.”

With a sigh, Asha marched with all the others into the human building where the human connected Artoo to the internet. The little Droid was suddenly very worried about his well being. He could not find any information about droids that wasn’t anecdotal or totally wrong. Concerned for his own well being, Artoo uploaded his memory and a how-to manual for droid construction and repairs to the internet.



Far above Sunnydale, three starships were flying over, and the pilots were rather alarmed at the distinct lack of com service or normal human technology. Lt. Kettch, Pilot Kolot and Tarfang realized they were nearly alone, with only a few of their own people remaining in the town below. Choosing to save themselves, they landed at the town’s air port, alarming the attendants. Those particular attendants were even more alarmed when three Ewoks clamored out of the spacecraft. An avid Lucas fan, the night watchman fainted dead away.



Mayor Richard Wilkins was looking out the window at all the Halloween festivities. It always warmed his heart to see so many people having fun. It was rather rare in Sunnydale, after all. But he was especially surprised when he saw three King Kongs climbing up the side of Sunnydale National Bank and roar out challenges, only to be shot by Ewoks with blasters set to stun. The King Kong’s fell asleep atop the bank’s roof and the Ewoks continued on their way, soon followed by three astromech droids.

“Gosh,” said Wilkins to himself. “Now that’s something you don’t see every day.”



When pilots Kettch, Kolot and Tarfang arrived at Sunnydale High School, they found their compatriots confronting a confounding individual by the name of Snyder, who was quite displeased at their presence.

“Go away you horrid things! I don’t care what you want!” the undesirable human snarled. Kettch stunned him with a blaster bolt.

“Yub yub!” declared Princess Kneesaa decisively, crossing her arms over her chest.

“Ooo chi wamma! Wi poo!” announced Logray with a wave of his hand.

“Koo tamna ki sa wiiikeet!” agreed Kaink with a nod of her head.

Warren leaned over and whispered to Threepio. “What are they saying?”

“Oh, I believe they have declared a holy war on the demons,” Threepio replied. “I don’t really know about what demons they speak of.”

Warren paused before replying. “Actually that would explain a lot about this town.” He glanced around. “I wonder where April got to?”



April the lovebot, thinking she was Xena, was drinking beer at a place called “Willy’s”. Every once in a while someone would approach her, and she would punch them before going back for another swig. People didn’t bother her after that.

Hearing an explosion outside the bar, patrons either looked out to see what was going on, or ran to the secret escape routes in the back. April/Xena did neither, simply continued drinking beer until long after the room was spinning.



Warren discovered that the “demons” Logray spoke of were in fact cars and trucks. And the Holy War was doing some serious damage against them. Paploo had the highest score, using her speeder bike to shoot them from a distance, but the others were no slouches either, using stone axes and spears to bust tires, break windows and dent fenders. When one was done, they’d continue onto the next one. Humans and the other…creatures that were out and about quickly learned to give the Ewok clan a wide berth.

Dru and Spike took a long look at the mayhem caused by their furry friends…and then they helped out.

By the time the sun rose on November First, there wasn’t a working car or truck in the town.



Across town, Spike and Drusilla got back to their lair just as the sun was rising and discovered a most horrific sight.

“Bloody Hell!” Spike screamed. “My DeSoto!”

Drusilla cheered him up a little later when they discovered that Alice could do six impossible things before breakfast.



At the Summers’ house, Angel was standing around confused as to why no one had come home. He brooded about it and then went back to his hole in the ground.



Inside Sunnydale High School, Warren found himself standing next to the restored Andrew and Tucker, in their C-3PO and R2-D2 costumes respectively. Tucker awoke to find his finger jammed in a modem slot. It hurt a bit. Pulling it back out hurt a lot.



Also with the rising of the sun was the end of the night of All Hallow’s Eve and the magic imposing the costume’s persona on the wearer ended. Not everything stopped, however. The Ewoks, the costumes having been a special order to Ethan’s Costume Shop were specially made. Although their human minds returned, their human bodies did not.

“Hey, does anyone else want to go pound some helmets and celebrate, or is that just me?” asked Devon.

“Not just you,” said Oz. “Maybe the dance too.”

Buffy, Willow, Joyce, Dawn, Giles, and Amy were all glaring at Xander

“Not my fault!”

“Then whose is it?”

“Um, when we return to our real bodies, do I get to keep the speeder bike?” Buffy asked.

“And my freighter?” asked a random student who had dressed as Tarfang at the behest of Cordelia.

“We’re so cute!” squealed Harmony happily. Nearly everyone else looked at her like she was either stupid or insane, or possibly both.

Cordelia Chase, still in the form of Princess Kneesaa, wrapped both hands around Xander’s furry neck and squeezed.

“Xander Harris,” she snarled, “I want to hurt you in ways that haven’t even been invented yet.”

“uerghk!” said Xander.



Names and Characters:
*means Ethan’s shop costume

Buffy: Paploo—Ewok speeder bike pilot*
Xander: Lieutenant Kettch—Ewok X-Wing pilot*
Willow: Asha—Ewok warrior with rare red hair, Eldest princess of Bright Tree Village.*
Giles: Logray—Ewok mystic leader, Force user*
Jenny: Kaink—Ewok priestess, Force user*
Warren: Party Town stormtrooper
Andrew: C-3PO*
Tucker: R2-D2*
Jonathan: Grael—Ewok Force User*
Oz: Kolot—Ewok X-Wing Pilot*
Devon: Wicket W. Warrick—Ewok, first to meet Leia*
Sam (Dingo): AT-ST Pilot 1—Ewok*
Dingo 4: AT-ST pilot 2—Ewok *
Cordelia: Princess Kneesaa—Ewok, Second Princess of Bright Tree Village and heir to throne, Force sensitive*
Harmony: Weechee—Ewok, evil princess, *
Aphrodesia: Wunka—Ewok, Imperial Gunner, *
Aura: Tokkat—Ewok, Imperial Gunner*
Gwen Ditchik: Batcheela—Ewok, named for wind deity*
Joyce: Shodu Warrick—Ewok, Wicket’s mother*
Dawn: Winda—Ewok, Wicket’s little sister*
Amy Madison: Rakra—Ewok priestess, Force sensitive*
Larry: Tarfang—Ewok freighter pilot and smuggler*
Dog Boy: Random Wookie with thermal detonators*
10 other random Sunnydalers: 10 random Ewoks*



To be continued...



I own none of these characters. George Lucas and Joss do, however. If you don't recognize the characters, most are from the Ewok movies from the 80s. And yes, Lucas does consider them cannon.

Special thanks goes to Greywizard for all the help.
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