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This story is No. 3 in the series "Forbidden Desires". You may wish to read the series introduction and the preceeding stories first.

Summary: This is a sequel to Release..., THIS IS SLASH FIC. Don's got any number of questions, as do a few others, will the answers be what they want to hear?

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
CSI > CSI New YorkDennSedaiFR2123,949021,26220 May 1019 Sep 10No

NOTE: This story is rated FR21 which is above your chosen filter level. You can set your preferred maximum rating using the drop-down list in the top right corner of every page.

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Chapter One

Rating: FRM to FRAO at points
Pairing: Graham Miller/Don Flack
Disclaimer: Buffy and company belong to Joss Whedon, CSI: New York is owned by CBS, Paramount, etc. I'm just borrowing them to play with, I don't own them...or they'd get a lot more fun times
Warning: Some angst and personal issues for the guys.
Author's Notes: Sequel of sorts to my story 'Release'. Don's distracted with questions that are preying on his mind. Mac's got some of the answers he needs... This story has NOT BEEN BETA READ.
Feedback is always welcome, I had written part of this way back when, and I was looking over some older fic and the muse bit again... I'm also considering a prequel to Release and moving this, 'Release' and the future not yet started prequel into their own series... thoughts?

"Flack," Mac yelled sharply.

Shaking his head, Don focused on Mac. "Yeah, what's up Mac?"

"You mean besides the fact that I've been calling your name for the past several minutes and you haven't answered?"

Don bit back a sigh and a shudder at that. It was rather obvious that Mac was one very pissed off CSI and Marine at the moment.

"We'll be having a discussion about this later Flack, catch me after shift, and we'll talk," Mac said growling. "I don't know what the problem is, but we will be talking."

Don just hung his head at that, knowing it wasn't going to be a pleasant discussion at all.


Popping the tops off of the two beers, Mac brought them into his living room where Don was waiting.

"Here,” Mac said passing over the beer. "Now we need to have a discussion Don, and while I have to have an 'official' discussion, all that's going to be noted is that you had a few things on your mind, and you're going to pay more attention at work. The rest of this conversation never happened, understood?"

Don nodded before taking a sip of his beer.

"Look, it's obvious that something is going on Don, I'm not a mind reader, so you're going to have to tell me what it is," Mac said gently. "I'm putting my own rep on the line and trying to keep this from getting out of hand. But there have been complaints filed. I'm trying to keep it from going any further, all right?"

Don let out a sigh at that. "I appreciate it Mac, and I promise I'll do my best not to let it happen again. It's's complicated."

Mac snorted at that. "What isn't in this life? So I'm guessing here, but it's not work related, even though it's screwing up your focus at work. It's been going on for a while now, so it's obviously something personal. Half the time, you're damn near giddy and acting like you're high, and the other half, you're distracted and moodier than Stella when it's that time of month. So talk to me."

"I...I can't Mac. If It get's out, it's going to cause a lot of problems. I just can't talk about it."

"Uh huh, which definitely means it's personal, I'll lay odds it involves someone you're seeing,' Mac said gently, taking a sip of his own beer before continuing.”I'd also guess that it's not strictly speaking 'woman' as I said once already I don't care about what the problem is, it just needs solved. And this conversation never 'officially' took place Don, so just spill it."


"No, Don. I'm not going to let it go. It's messing with your performance on the job, which means one of my people could get hurt at best, or killed at worst. So we are going to have this conversation and once it's done, I'm going to forget I ever had it in the first place, all right?"

"Fine...but if even one word of this gets out..." Don said trailing off at the look Mac shot him. "Fine...I've been seeing someone, and it's required a good bit of discretion on both of our parts. They're in and out of town at random times, and it's complicated."

"Uh huh, so why are they in and out of town so often Don, work related or otherwise?"

"They're military...and I shouldn't even be having this discussion Mac..."

"As if I'm going to repeat it Don. I'm not like that, I don't care who a person is with, as long as it's not illegal or going to bite their ass with regards to work. Got me?"

Don nodded at that. "They're an active duty Marine. I don't know exactly what...but all I've been able to piece together says I'm probably better off not knowing."

Mac nodded at that. "I'm assuming here Don, but 'Don't Ask, Don't Tell', is part of the worry?"

Don blushed and gulped his beer, which was answer enough for Mac. "I see. Like I said Don, I don't care since it's not illegal, and they're obviously of age. So what else is bothering you?"

"He...he won't talk about his assignment. A few times, hell, I shouldn't even be talking about this, but a few times I've noticed odd scars or injuries that I can't explain...and some of the nightmare's he's had that woke me up..." Don trailed off with a shudder.

"Ahhh," was all that Mac said. "I'm going out on a branch here, but probably trauma related, deployment nightmares?"

Don just nodded.

"Have you tried getting the person to talk about it, so that you can help with it?"

"Yeah, it led to one of our more spectacular fights...not physical," Don added when Mac started to say something. "But it was a doozy of a fight. Some of what I've picked up on....I don't know if I'm nuts, he's nuts, or if the truth would send me straight to a bottle to blot out the thoughts."

Mac frowned at that. "Meaning?"

"Meaning, I asked one time, and I've seen clam's who were less shut up about it then he was. I know he's not regular duty, he's told me that much at least."


Don just nodded slightly at that. "He said he got tapped right out of basic for specialized training and that it's beyond covert with what he's doing now. Then he backed off like he'd told someone that he was...well you know. Refused to even talk to me for a few days after that."

"All right, that is more than a little interesting. Got a name that I can run?"

Don shot a 'yeah right' look at Mac for that.

"Don, if he's that covert, I don't want it to come back and bite you or the labs on the ass. So give me a name. I still have some contacts, and I won't say why I'm asking, and they won't ask why either. It might make things a lot easier on you to at least know for certain."


"Don, either you tell me, or I can go digging. If I do that, it's going to raise more than a few flags. Your call though."

"Fine, its Miller, Graham Miller. Captain as far as I know."

"Just trust me Don, I won't out him, as I don't care. Whatever answers, I get, I'll give to you and then it's done. All right?"

"Yeah...I'm just not sure I want to know, you know..."


"Taylor," Mac said as he answered his phone.

"What the hell are you involved in Mac," Gibbs voice replied over the phone. "Because that's one hell of a hot potato you passed me."

"I promised the person I'd ask, and also that I wouldn't share why I was asking Gibbs," Mac replied, grabbing pen and paper.

"Yeah well, I didn't get any answers, and I wasn't about to push the issue either."

"That doesn't sound good," Mac said slowly, setting down the pen and paper. "How bad are we talking here?"

"Well above my 'official' clearance levels. I did catch one small piece of information and that was that he was on special assignment out of New York City, on specialized duty with the UN."

"Interesting," Mac said carefully.

"Yeah, I also sent you a package, since it was some old photos of when we were in the corps together. Should be there in a few days."

"That's very thoughtful of you Gibbs. I'll look forward to that package."

"I'm sure you will. Do keep in touch Mac."


Opening the package that Gibbs had sent him, Mac scanned over the contents, quickly reading through the basic information he frowned slightly. Pausing a moment, he grabbed pen and paper to start making some notes of his own. Reading through the 'official' jacket again, he made note of a few oddities that jumped out at him. Closing it at last, he set it aside. Opening the sealed manila envelope, that had been inside the package, he slowly read over the hand written notes, his frown deepening as he read through them. Coming to the last page, he swore softly at what he read. The information was more than a damn hot potato, and it was definitely going to leave him with nightmares of his own.

The only question was, did he share it with Don, or not. Granted he had promised to share whatever he learned, but this was so far beyond classified that it would send both himself and Gibbs to Leavenworth for a very, very long time for even knowing about it.

Gathering up his notes, he stuffed them inside the manila envelope along with the hand written report and shoved the rest of it back in the package, before resealing it again.

Picking up his cell phone, he dialed Don's cell and waited as it rang.

"Don, my place tonight, I've got a few things that I need to discuss with you about a recent case."

Listening as Don replied, he frowned slightly. "Yes, it's about that one case I was discussing with you previously."

Mac smirked as Don finally caught the clue, and nodded. "Yeah, that's fine."

Yes I do have another chapter that I'm finishing off and a third chapter at the vague planning stage to follow . Feedback is always welcome, while flames will be cackled at.
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