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With Tears In My Eyes

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This story is No. 15 in the series "Life in A Minor". You may wish to read the series introduction and the preceeding stories first.

Summary: Cordelia ends up in a new world with a new team.

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
Marvel Universe > X-MenDamiaFR1516,713163,06825 Aug 1025 Aug 10Yes
Song: With Tears In My Eyes
Artist: Ke$ha

Disclaimer: I do not own Buffy or Angel or X-Men Origins: Wolverine.
Notes: I have decided to use the FFA to get some of the creative juices flowing again, maybe jump start the muse. I’ve had a lousy couple months, but I’m trying to get back to my writing.

XXXX

It was her own fault. Again. She’d pushed him away once more and she knew she didn’t deserve another chance so she’d run. She’d run straight to a bar and then into the club down the street. The brunette moved her shoulders and hands and hips with the thick beat of the bass, tossing her head back and letting strangers grip her close. She was lost in the music, trying to pretend she didn’t feel dirty inside for letting these people touch her, grope her, pull her closer. She stepped away from the hands that caressed her supple curves, disappearing deeper into the crowd.

A hand trailed from her shoulder to the waistband of her pants, fingers slipping beneath the thin fabric as the palm pushed her back into the mans stomach. She let herself go, reveling in the motions, pushing away the thoughts that were trying to choke her. She kept her eyes closed, letting her head fall back onto the persons shoulder. She could pretend he was the one if she didn’t open her eyes.

With her eyes closed those fingers were sun tanned and the arms were thick with muscles, the chin was almost always scruffy and that mouth .... that mouth was smirking or lashing out with sarcastic comments. She could pretend that he was the one she needed, wanted. Could pretend that he was the one that she’d been attracted to since she’d ended up in this gods forsaken world. She was reminding herself of Faith, but hey, if it had worked for the slayer maybe it could work for her. Maybe she could forget him, but that thought just brought forward more memories ....

here we go

welcome to my funeral

without you i don’t even have a pulse


Their meeting hadn’t been exactly epic. She’d dropped out of a portal in the middle of nowhere and smacked her head on a rock, giving herself a concussion. Wade was with a team of mercenaries, most of whom had special powers, and she’d fallen almost literally on top of them. Thankfully they hadn’t left her there. Instead they’d brought her back to camp and directly to the infirmary. According to the report she’d been out for 2 hours before coming to, and he was the first one she saw upon waking.

“Brown Eyes. Pretty.” The man beside her bed glanced over before turning back to the dirty magazine he was flipping through casually. Cordelia turned her head to look over at the man who was paying more attention to her than he wanted her to know.

“Ditto,” She agreed before glancing at the magazine and raising an eyebrow. She didn’t open her eyes though, she wasn’t quite sure where she was. The powers had said she wasn’t going to be going home, but she had time left to live. So they’d sent her elsewhere without a by your leave.

“Got a name?” He asked as she sat up and discovered the tacky silver bracelets keeping her attached to the hospital bed. She turned to glare at him.

“I have a name for you,” She grumbled tugging at the handcuffs futilely. He spared her a bright smile before looking back to the magazine.

“I prefer Wade,” Was his only response.

“Cordelia Chase.” Cordelia informed him a moment later.

all alone it's dark and cold

with every move i die


It took a few hours for the people Wade was working with, she wasn’t sure if it was a government or another type of organization to be honest, to discover that she wasn’t in any system they could find. Not her name her face or her fingerprints.

“Does this mean we can keep her?” Wade asked brightly. Stryker gave him a dirty look and look around at the rest of the team.

“She is awfully pretty,” Victor commented, eyes straying upward as he let his imagination take over.

“Knock it off Victor,” James Logan sent him a dark look and then went back to watching William.

“Where else is she gonna go? I mean, it’s nice to have something pretty to look at once in a while. Like wall art or a garden fountain,” Wade smiled brightly as Stryker’s face got a little more red.

“We have a mission to prep for,” Wraith reminded them all after a moment. They sat for a moment longer before someone called for the Colonel to come to the infirmary, Ms. Chase was having problems.

here i go

this is my confession oh

a lost cause nobody can save my soul


Wade hadn’t followed Stryker just to irritate him, the woman in the bed was endlessly fascinating and he was genuinely a little worried at the call. When he entered the room, only just then realizing that the rest of the crew had followed, the discovered Cordelia’s eyes had gone completely white and she was hyperventilating, whimpering softly from the pain.

“What’s wrong with her?” Stryker demanded as Cordelia’s back bowed up off the bed and then she collapsed completely. Her eyes fluttered a bit, closing and opening softly. As Cordelia turned her head to inspect the people that had entered the room and narrowed her now normal looking eyes.

“What’s wrong with me? What’s wrong with you? Do you not know how to do background checks? The funny looking white guy with the big ears in your tech section is on the payroll of the guys who’s compound your supposed to hit tonight. He’s gonna give them a call in about 5 minutes and then your team is gonna get shot to hell trying to get in tonight,” Cordelia let her head fall back, her hand moving up to cover her eyes. Damn headaches.

“On it,” Wade was out the door, Victor right behind him, the two on their way to get the funny looking guy. If there was more than one then they’d just have to kill them all. That was alright with him.

i am so delusional

with every move i die


Cordelia was left locked to the bed and irritated beyond belief while the boys got to go play. Of course when she’d used those terms to gripe with Stryker had stared at her blankly for a few moments before leaving her alone in the room. Soon after a few other men came in and start measuring brain waves and asking questions about her abilities and strengths (shopping) and what she perceived to be her weaknesses (German chocolate cake.) Eventually they left her alone and after that her only company was the male nurse that came through to check her vitals every hour.

She spent the next day and a half like that, laying strapped down to a bed and plotting revenge should she get the chance. Revenge on everyone with the possible exception of Victor Creed, but only because she didn’t like the way he looked at her. Like he wanted to eat her, and not in the fun way. It also said something that no one else was willing to let him see her alone.

“How are you enjoying things princess?” Wade asked as she ignored the tray of food that was sitting in front of her. Limp green beans and mystery meatloaf wasn’t her idea of good food and sugary desserts made her ill if she didn’t have real food in her first so even though the jello cubes looked good she didn’t bother touching them or the slice of apple turnover.

“Let’s switch places and you can tell me,” Cordelia offered with a bright smile. He grinned back easily, popping a piece of jello in his mouth.

“Your idea is intriguing,” He admitted a moment later.

“That’s because you’re thinking with the wrong head,” Cordelia shot back.

“This could be true in your opinion, in mine it’s always best to think with monster-me first. It makes everything easier once you decide whether or not you’d sleep with someone,” Wade informed her.

i have destroyed our life,

it's gone

payback is sick

it's all my fault


“That’s toward the top of the list of things I never needed to know,” James Logan admitted as he and Victor came into the room.

“If it helps you’re a maybe.” Wade shrugged as he snagged another piece of Cordelia’s jello. He turned his dark eyes to Victor next, “You’re a hell no, but only because you remind me of this woman I used to keep warm when her husband was away,” He swung his head around to confide the next part to Cordy. “She drew blood more than once with those claws of hers,”

“I’ll show you blood,” Victor offered easily, flipping the other man off. Wade clutched a hand to his heart and affected to look properly gratified. Wraith and Fred, who’d come in unnoticed, shared a look and shook their heads.

“Good you’re all here,” Stryker entered the room and shut the door behind him. Cordelia raised a single eyebrow at the man as he stepped forward.

“Yeah, the canceled my trip to sea world so I figured I’d hang out a little,” Cordelia informed him, her voice thick with scorn as she jerked the wrist that kept her locked to the bed.

“I like ponies myself,” Wade said thoughtfully before turning to an unamused Colonel.

“Ms. Chase. Sunnydale California does not exist. Nor do you. Do you know how you came through the portal?” Stryker demanded. Cordelia stared at him for a moment. She’d gone over all this already with the doctors.

“I fell.” She kept her voice flat and scorn-free.

“Cute.” Victor offered her a feral smile.

“You’re point?”

“Welcome to the team,” Stryker intoned after a moment of silence.



I'm dancing with tears in my eyes

just fighting to get through the night


“Can’t I just use my feminine wiles?” Cordelia demanded as Wraith put her through her paces. She’d been in decent shape back home, but to be with Team X you had to be amazingly, tip top, freakishly in shape.

“Feminine wiles wont stop a bullet to your face,” Frank intoned from the sidelines. Cordy flipped him off while ducking Wraith’s left hook and rolling out of the way as he teleported behind her. They made a surprisingly formidable team when against others, the way she just knew what was about to happen and he reacted to her. When against each other it was even more fun.

Over the last 3 weeks they’d discovered all kinds of things about the resident female. The only time her eyes went white was when she was seeing things, like scenes from a movie played in her head. They also gave her a headache and were always important. Little things she just knew, like part of a whole, didn’t give her headaches and sometimes she didn’t even know she knew. Like she’d known Victor’s real age and Logan’s favorite color.

She was the only female at camp and used it to her advantage whenever possible. Better food, better toiletries, longer shower time. She was slowly twisting people around her finger and Stryker had commented dryly that if she could teach that particular talent they’d have spies the world over.

It had only been a few weeks but people could already see the change. She could keep up with the guys during their runs and she’d leaned down a bit, though she still kept her killer curves. More than one had noticed, though they’d learned that looking didn’t mean you could touch. The first man to try and grope Cordy into a closet had gotten her knee to his groin and her fist in his face. An hour later Wade went and had a quiet talk with him that involved Stryker having to explain why we didn’t kill lackeys on base. Wade had ignored him as usual.

I'm losing it

with every move i die


They’d been on their way to the mess when Cordelia had cursed quietly and when “Her Boys” as she’d dubbed them, had looked her eyes had changed to straight white and she’d begun to collapse. Wade caught her and Wraith had teleported them to the infirmary where the swordsman had laid her on the bed. The rest of the team joined them just before Cordy blinked her eyes clear and began cursing.

“That looked fun,” Wade commented as she wound down. Frank passed her a glass of water and the bottle of ibuprofen that one of the passing nurses had handed to him when he mentioned Cordy’s vision. They were used to her now.

“Go fuck yourself Wilson,” Cordelia growled, swinging her legs over the bed and sitting up to take the medicine from Frank.

“It’s not nearly as fun without a playmate,” Wade answered, unperturbed.

“Right. We need to get to Stryker, someone is doing naughty things with government money and I’m not fond of children with bombs.” Cordelia said darkly. Her Boys were smart enough to simply follow her lead.

I'm fading

I'm broken inside

I've wasted the love of my life


She’d known that they killed humans, she’d known and she’d still agreed to be part of their team. Not that she really had another choice. She didn’t want to be a squeamish little girl, so she’d pulled the trigger when the man had raised his gun at James. At least he was going to. Sometimes it was hard because she saw something in her mind while it hadn’t actually happened. She’d learned to trust the violent part of her mind, the primal part that said “hurt them before they hurt us,” She’d stayed in the back, dressed in snug jeans and knee high boots, a gun belt that made her think of Lara Croft strapped over her hips and a Sapphire blue tank top on under the flak vest. Someone, she was betting Wade, had a name tag reading “Princess” stitched in pink across the back, but she shrugged and didn’t comment. She’d been Queen C for a long time.

Cordelia was supposed to be backup, on hand in case shit was going to hit the fan so she could get them out or at least come up with plan B or C. Still she’d seen them all fighting, it was breathtaking if you ignored the fact that they were killing all the other guys. They moved with such grace and precision, it was like a well choreographed ballet. Then she’d seen the man raising his gun at the James. Sure he’d live through it, likely heal rather quickly, but that didn’t matter. One of her boys had a gun raised against him. So Cordelia had drawn her own gun in a flash and shot that man ... only she’d shot him in the side of the head because he hadn’t turned toward Logan yet.

Her drawing her weapon brought her into the fight, bullets started flying at her as well so she shot back, and all that practice was doing well. She killed 3 men that day. She sucked it all in and waited until they left, not talking to anyone as they rode down the elevator and climbed into the truck. She didn’t even argue as she got stuck between Frank and Victor on the way back. Though she did elbow the feral man in the gut when he sniffed her hair. Freaking creep.

i'm losing it

with every move i die


Cordelia took the time to cry quietly in the shower where no one would see her. This was not Sunnydale or LA. No, it was something much harsher and she hadn’t quite believed it until just then. She wasn’t Queen C for nothing though. She got out of the shower, blow dried her long dark hair, letting if fall silkily down her back before pulling on a pair of black jeans that hugged every curve, a low cute maroon tank top and the black boots she’d worn for the op. She didn’t have much in the way of clothes, but she had enough to get by. For now. It took her only a few minutes to search out Wraith. Sadly he wasn’t alone, but that could be worked with. She gave him her best 100 watt smile as she walked in.

“She wants something,” Wade warned.

“Usually does,” Wraith agreed.

“I need a field trip,” She informed them brightly. The two glanced at each other and then over at the rest of the team. Victor was shuffling cards at the table with the others and James was sucking on the end of his cigar.

“Where?” Wraith asked as the others didn’t bother pretending they couldn’t hear them.

“I don’t care as long as there’s a club. I need to dance,” Cordelia informed him. They seemed to mull it over silently before Victor shooed them off. Wade Frank and Wraith were joining her, the rest were going to play poker.

when did i become such a hypocrite

double life, lies that you caught me in

trust me I'm paying for it with every move i die


She moved with abandon in the center of the dance floor, allowing no one more than a single dance before moving off. She shrugged off hands and hips, disappearing into the beat of whichever song came on. It was like Sunnydale, you danced until your feet hurt and your muscles were loose and you were covered in a sheen of sweat. You danced yourself into the ground so that when you went home and passed out you wouldn’t dream of the horrors you’d seen or the parents for whom you were never good enough.

She wasn’t sure when it had happened. One minute she was closing her eyes and seeing bodies falling to the ground, bodies she’d killed. She let some man pull her close and slip a hand under her shirt. Then he was suddenly gone, pulled from her without a word. She turned to see what had happened and found herself faced with a strangely somber Wade Wilson. Later she would blame hormones and loneliness, she would claim the lights made her eyes seem bright and wet. For now though, she needed a connection to this horrifying new world.

Her hands moved first, one gripping the hair on the back of his head, the other clutching the side of his shirt. When their mouths met she discovered something new about Wade, his hands were gentle. The rest of him was rock hard muscle but his lips and his hands were soft and knew where to touch to make her need him even more.

They were two statues in the middle of the dance floor before they broke apart and Wade towed her to Wraith. “We’re ready to go home,” He informed his friend. They walked under the stairs where people weren’t watching and he sent the two of them home, he and Frank were still chatting up ladies.

They ended up in Wades room, ripping clothing and falling to the bed still half tangled in what they’d been wearing. It wasn’t gentle, it was fierce and rushed and over too soon. Still tangled in sheets and half removed shirts they slowed down for the second time, helping remove stray threads and the single sock Cordelia still had on.

on the floor I'm just a zombie who I am is not who i wanna be

I'm such a tragedy with every move i die


The next morning Cordelia rolled over and found a smirking Wade staring at her. She raised an eyebrow and stared back. They were silent for a few moments before Wade opened his mouth to say something. Having a feeling it wouldn’t be polite Cordelia lifted her head and shoved her tongue into his mouth. He seemed to enjoy it, pulling her closer and rolling so she was now laying half on top of him.

“This is bringing back happy flashbacks,” Wade announced as they separated.

“Better be of last night,” Cordelia said darkly, rolling off of him and searching the floor for her underwear. She lifted the scrap of black and sighed. It was ripped beyond repair. She tossed the fabric back on the floor and snagged her bra, a quick inspection told her that one was still in good condition. It took her a couple minutes to find the rest and she laughingly tossed them onto the bed. She’d messed up the zipper of her pants and she’d have to fix the tear on the shoulder of the top before she wore it again.

“Looks like we did good,” Wade said cheerfully.

“I need something to wear to shower,” She informed him with a smirk, “Unless you want me wandering around nude.”

“Probably best not to rub everyone’s face in what they’re missing,” He agreed, getting out of bed and giving her a view of his scratched up back. She smirked again, quite proud of herself for the nail gauges in his shoulders. He had liked that part as well. While he was up she helped herself to a view of his back end, the man was built like Adonis wished he was.

“For me?” She asked with wide eyes, snatching the black boxers and the over sized black shirt from his hands. She dressed quickly, slipping on her socks and blowing him a playful kiss before leaving his room, all her clothes still in their, to head for the showers.

When she passed Victor he gave her a knowing leer and took a theatrical sniff of the air. “Ah, the smell of love, or something,” He added the last part snidely and Cordelia flipped him off, in too good a mood to let the stray cat ruin it. No, she didn’t love Wade, but he’d certainly made last night nice.

i have destroyed our life,

it's gone

payback is sick

it's all my fault


They didn’t have any illusions about each other, it started out as Friends with Benefits. From their it grew for both of them, surprising both of them. He was cold and more than a bit psychotic, but he didn’t turn it on her. She was loud and abrasive and could give back when he was flipping shit left and right. His sarcasm and her abrasive honesty made for interesting moments, but Team X eventually got used to her screaming at him and him lashing with cold sarcasm. After their arguments they tended to disappear into one of their rooms for a few hours before coming out disheveled and hungry.

She didn’t like to kill people, they could all see it and they understood. She did it if she had to or if she thought someone was in danger, but otherwise she was there to look pretty. Her words, not theirs. They knew better. On bad days she demanded field trips for shopping or, more often, dancing.

She told them stories about her family and friends. How magic was always going insane at her home town, how the mayor had turned into a giant snake demon and tried to eat the graduating class but they’d saved most of them. Not the principal, but she still refused to believe that creepy little troll was fully human.

They moved camp a few times, and eventually Cordelia stopped getting her own room, instead sharing one with Wade. He didn’t rub it in, but when the new men they were working with took too much time eyeballing her, he had words. Words and sparring practice. Sadly it usually ended with the other man in the infirmary.

I'm dancing with tears in my eyes

just fighting to get through the night


Cordelia proved herself an enemy that none wanted to have more than once. People, not the team but their removable backup usually, made comments about such a beautiful woman being part of Team X. A woman who didn’t like to kill and who often complained about her wardrobe. They also commented on why someone like that would still be part of the team, what favors she had performed and what she brought to the team. When these comments were vocalized where the team could hear it was usually taken care of quickly. Every now and then though, Cordelia would catch wind.

“With an ass like that?” That was all Cordelia had heard, but she had the feeling she wouldn’t like to know the rest. She paused behind the two men that were standing with nothing to do.

“I dunno, I just keep thinking of that mouth. With all the shit she talks she’s gotta be pro with that tongue,” The other man was disagreeing in a friendly manner. Too friendly in Cordelia’s opinion. Again she was the only girl at this newest outpost. She’d gotten used to it though.

“God what I’d give to get a piece of Chase,” The first guy moaned a bit before he and his friend continued to laugh.

“Like you’d ever have a chance, let’s all take a moment so you two can get over yourselves and smell reality.” The woman announced, her voice scathing as both men turned quickly to face her. She let her eyes rake over both of them dismissively for a moment. “Women who look like this,” She gestured to herself with newly manicured fingers, “Do not touch rabble that looks like that,” She flicked her fingers at the two of them, a sneer on her face.

“What’s going on?” Frank asked with a grin as he came around the corner and spotted the brunette with the two soldiers.

“I was just explaining some of the facts of life,” She told the tall man brightly, falling in beside him to pass the two men. She made sure step carefully around them so they wouldn’t touch.

i'm losing it

with every move i die

“Seriously? I’m a little old to kidnap and use for ritual sacrifices. Trust me, I got over that back in high school. Now it’s just sad and overdone.” Cordelia informed the masked man that was standing beside the camera. She wasn’t sure how it had happened, but she’d had to pee and then something had hit her and she opened her eyes moments ago in this ... basement?

“Shut up,” The man walked over and backhanded her before going back to fiddling with the camera.

“Nice!” She spit a bit of blood out of her mouth and glared daggers at the mans back. She hated biting her cheek, it always stung and took too long to heal.

“You will read what is on this cards -”

“These. It’s ‘these cards’ if you’re using the plural form,” She interrupted, a bland look on her face.

“Did I not tell you to stay silent?” He hissed at her. Cordelia raised a single, unimpressed brow.

“No. You told me to shut up,” She stopped focusing on the laptop that was up and already streaming to someone, Cordelia assumed it would be the team. The man didn’t seem to notice. She gave an internal cheer for inept foes.

“Be silent and read the cues or you shall die,” He hissed at her again. Cordelia glanced at the large piece of cardboard he held up.

“Seriously? That’s what you want?” She asked in some disbelief, someone named Assam Bendir was supposed to be released from prison in exchange for her freedom. If she remembered correctly he was part of a terrorist cell that they’d infiltrated and he was one of the ones that had died ... actually she was pretty sure all of them had died.

I'm fading

I'm broken inside

I've wasted the love of my life


They were standing there watching the video, debating if Wade should be coming with them or not. They couldn’t be sure that there was only the one person with Cordelia and they still weren’t sure how the person had gotten her off the compound to begin with. If there were multiple adversaries they might need the swordsman ... on the flip side he might go into vicious mode and that was never good. James Logan winced as he watched Cordelia get backhanded again.

“What is your childhood trauma?” She demanded of the masked man before rotating her jaw a bit.

“5. I need to rethink my plan. Can’t cut off a hand for every time he slaps her ... fingers?” Wade was commenting lightly to himself as he cocked his head, his blank face watching the screen.

“The mission is a go,” Stryker finally agreed that the whole team should go rescue their damsel.

“We’re off to kill the asshole,” Wade started singing to the tune of “we’re off to see the wizard,” as Wraith teleported them to Cordelia. Stryker watched the screen as Wade and the rest showed up. “Who thought he could rough up my girl,” Wade finished the song even as his swords removed one of the man’s hands and skewered through his shoulder, pinning the man to the wall.

“About time you guys showed up. I thought I was gonna have to rescue myself here,” Cordelia griped.

I'm losing it

with every move i die


Frank was wide eyed and pressed against the wall while Victor seemed to be leaning forward a bit, enjoying the show. It had been 2 weeks since they’d gone to rescue Cordelia. The formidable woman had been demanding extra self defense lessons and throwing herself into it with single minded fury. That didn’t seem to stop Wade from demanding she stay behind them all during missions. In fact a he’d been questioning if she was even needed. They’d done fine before she’d come along, they’d do fine without her.

“Who the hell do you think you are telling me what I should and shouldn’t do?” Cordelia was shouting as Stryker glowered at the two of them, not bothering to step into the middle of it. Again.

“You’re a liability.” Wade informed her calmly. He was trying to protect her but going about it the wrong way. Arguing with Queen C and telling her what to do was bound to make her do exactly the opposite.

“Say’s the man who can’t keep his mouth shut and tends to kill those he’s suppose to question before said questioning has even begun,” Cordelia snapped back.

“And yet I don’t get kidnapped and put our entire operation at risk.” He returned, his voice raised a bit.

“No, you just go forward swords blazing without a second thought,” She retorted.

“You didn’t complain last night,” He reminded her instantly, a bland smile on his face.

“Sword. Right. More like a dagger,” She told him in a flat tone. Victor laughed out loud at that one, half wondering if her could get someone to bring him popcorn. Maybe he should just bring it with him to the next meeting.

“I say again, you weren’t complaining last night,” Wade replied.

“But I never said I didn’t have second thoughts,” She replied, face grim as she turned and left the room, a speechless Wade Wilson behind her.

“Finally, someone else gets the last word,” Victor cheered, smiling with good humor as Wade sneered at him.

this is it and now your really gone this time

never once thought I'd be in pieces left behind


Cordelia moved her things out of their room and into an empty one down the hall. She didn’t need his shit, she could take care of herself. She had been since she was about 13. She’d survived demon sacrifices and apocalypses and getting agonizing visions and getting demonic essence thrown into her and being thrown into an alternate frakking universe. She would survive breaking up with a man that wasn’t right for her all along. Not matter how electric he seemed to be.

With a furious growl Cordelia stalked into the gym to practice with Frank. At the moment she was focusing on taking down larger opponents, which most people she’d be up against were. Frank for his part was fine being used as a punching bag for the Seer. He liked her humor and her temper and, well, it was the most action he’d gotten for some time now. Not that he’d say as much to him. He’d watched her verbally castrate enough men and once come close to literally castrating another. 2 others if you counted Victor, but he’d regenerate if she got that close. Hopefully.

“Don’t hold back too much,” She informed him as he rushed her and she slipped down and shoved up, twisting a bit so he went flying over her shoulders. She’d been using Aikido as a base, a smart move using others strength against themselves. Her weapon of choice was a battle axe made specifically for her, so it was a little smaller than usual. However she was good with it, swinging and slicing and blocking. She didn’t use it against Frank though, tough as he was she was still afraid of hurting him. she liked the big guy.

“Break time,” Wraith announced from the sidelines some time later. Cordelia’s shorts and sports bra were drenched with sweat. She downed some water and wiped her face with a towel, walking over to the short black man as Frank groaned and got back to his feet.

“We got a mission?” She asked curiously. She’d had another half hour slotted to the workout.

“Yeah. You and me. Club. Go change,” Wraith gave her a small smile and Cordelia gave him one in return. The man was good. He was possibly her best friend next to Wade, which was maybe why she and Wade knew each others buttons so well. Cordelia was a woman of passion and movement, as always she needed a release and with sex out of the equation at the moment dancing was the next best thing.

I'm dancing with tears in my eyes

just fighting to get through the night


It took her twenty minutes to shower and change into a black miniskirt and tank top, the boots she seemed to live in on her feet. She pulled her hair back into a single long ponytail before meeting Wraith out by his jeep and climbing in.

Wraith took a seat at a small table that overlooked the dance floor while Cordelia went straight to the dance floor. It took less than a moment to get in sync with the music, moving her hips and feet and arms in time. The movements always seemed to hypnotize her before the first song was over, draining her stress and fears and filling her with a peace she sometimes forgot existed.

Tonight she was angry and tired, she didn’t want people touching her and swiftly disentangled herself from anyone that tried. People were cool with it for the most part, moving onto someone more willing. Of course she was one of the best looking women in the club so some tried to push it. They didn’t try hard after she grabbed a fistful of crotch and twisted until they got a painful clue.

As soon as she was loose and relaxed he showed up. His tall lean form walked straight through the crowd of dancers, people moving out of his way without realizing it. His presence leeched danger and people avoided it whenever possible. If they’d been in her home dimension Cordy would have questioned if he was wholly human, but she was here. In this place.

She kept dancing, ignoring him as he stood watching her, hands dipped inside of his pockets as he simply watched her with an expressionless face. She was one of the few people that he was like that with. He didn’t need to act and taunt her, not usually anyway. She knew he’d never questioned what was between them, that he’d simply known and accepted that she was his and he was hers. They weren’t for anyone else. Soul mates was too kitschy a term for either of them to use, but it was something like that.

The song switched over to something slower and Wade made his move. He stepped forward, catching one of her hands as she moved, pulling her forward and into his embrace. He rested his cheek on the top of her head and wrapped his arms around her. Cordelia let her cheek rest against his throat and wrapped her arms around his waist.

“Come back with me.” His soft voice was calm and even, more statement than a plea, but he wasn’t the kind to beg. Not even if he wanted to. Cordelia took his hand as the song ended and pulled him off the dance floor. It was all the answer he needed.

i'm losing it

with every move i die


Their first fight seemed so long ago and sometimes it felt like yesterday. As Cordelia danced with the man behind her, his hands inching into territory that was far too dangerous she felt tears fall down her face. They fought and screamed and taunted and used words that they didn’t really mean ... words they didn’t want to use. If those that knew her back in high school could see her now they wouldn’t know her at all. She was in love with a killer. A man that made it hard for her to breathe when he was around, and yet she still spit and clawed and yowled like a hellcat when she lost it.

Cordelia pulled the mans hand out of her pants as it tried to stray beneath the lace of her panties. When he tried to pull her closer she grabbed his wrist and twisted it until she heard a cry of pain. She moved smoothly away without looking back at the man she’d just injured. He wasn’t worth it. She couldn’t bring herself to pretend he was someone he wasn’t. She wanted Wade and couldn’t see herself with anyone else. Despite their differences and their angry words.

They were too alike sometimes. When angry and scared they said things they didn’t mean. No, that wasn’t true. Cordelia said things she didn’t mean. Known for being blunt and unflinching, she flinched in front of him. When they blew up it was close to Pompeii, at least that’s what Logan used to say, of course he was gone now. Frank and Wraith too. Soon she’d lose Wade to Stryker’s experiments and she’d be locked up on 3 mile island with the rest of his little toys.

She’d told him he wanted it, that he was willing to risk her for his own gains. That he would kill her for immortality. He wouldn’t kill her body, just her heart. If he was gone what was the point of being in this world? Why was she there? What kind of a good guy was she when she helped killers do their dirty work? She’d questioned herself over and over, but she was here for him. No one else.

I'm fading

I'm broken inside

I've wasted the love of my life


Cordelia froze as a slow song started and a hand pulled hers from behind. She knew it was him. She brunette turned to face him and Wade stood there, waiting for her to cuddle into him and wrap her arms around his waist. He didn’t have to wait long. It was the same thing that happened every time. She screamed and stomped away and he let her go until she was ready to come back.

As always he pretended not to notice the angry tears she was now smudging onto his shirt. He’d have gotten her during the last slow song but the man that had rubbed himself all over Cordelia had needed to be taken care of first. His body would be found whenever the trash was picked up, buried at the bottom of the large trash can. He shouldn’t have tried to hold onto her when she tried to leave.

“Come back with me,” Wade said as the song ended. Cordelia took his hand, as she had so many times before, and led him off the dance floor.

I'm losing it

with every move i die

The End

You have reached the end of "With Tears In My Eyes". This story is complete.

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