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Candygram

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Summary: Xander has some inspiration on how to weaken the Judge. Inspired by Mmooch and 'The great hummus attack'

Categories Author Rating Chapters Words Recs Reviews Hits Published Updated Complete
BtVS/AtS Non-Crossover > Comedy > Xander-CenteredtexaswookieFR71498062,34926 Sep 1026 Sep 10Yes
I blame mmooch for this little blurb that was inspired by “The great hummus attack.” Don’t own Blazing Saddles or Buffy.



Xander looked up at Buffy a grin in his eyes as he looked at her. “Hey Buff, before you fire, can I try one thing please?” He asked hopefully.” If I do this right, then it will make sure that this goes down. I just want to soften him up a bit.”

The others looked at where the Judge, Angelus, and Drusilla were striding through the mall before turning back toward the person who had made it possible for them to do this. “Fine Xander, but hurry.” Buffy ordered her friend. She then grinned brightly at him. “Besides, I want to try out my new birthday present."

Xander grinned back at her, giving a mock salute as he rushed forward with a package in his hands. He walked up to the Judge who was currently sucking the soul out of a person. “Candygram for Judge-o.” He said with a smirk causing the other scoobies to snort. The Judge merely ignored him, so Xander held his package up again in offering coming even closer to the powerful demon. "Candygram for Judge-o." He repeated, trying to get the creature to take his package.

The Judge looked surprised at the offered package. Not sure what he was doing he took the offered package oblivious to the incredulous look that Angelus was sending him for ignoring the boy in front of him.

“Sign here please.” Xander said with a grin as he offered out his clipboard. The demon nodded and scribbled out something and the two traded a package for a clipboard. Still smiling Xander winked mockingly at Angelus and marched away back to the others.

The others watched with bated breath as the demon pulled the package apart and found a cake with a sparkling candle in it. “How odd.” The Judge said, as he held the cake up not noticing that the two vampires were now running away from him. The candle reached its end and an explosion ripped into the Judge as the stick of dynamite blew up in his face. As he reeled from the explosion a military grade rocket slammed into him finishing the job of knocking his body apart.

“We are the law.” Buffy said with a grin, as she lowered the weapon down to inspect their handiwork on the demon.

“Yeah, well then where are your badges?” Angelus growled from where he was glaring at the group. “Face it your just a bunch of kids destined to die.”

Xander merely smirked at him. “Badges? We don’t need no stinking badges!” The youth said as the group walked away from the downed vampire. ”So,” he looked at the others. “Who’s up for watching Blazing Saddles now the inspiration for some of the ideas for tonight?” The girls all shrugged and figured Xander had earned the movie choice for tonight after all he did.

The End

You have reached the end of "Candygram". This story is complete.

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