IF IT QUACKS LIKE A DEMON AUTHOR’S NOTE: Xander and Faith make another stop on the whirlwind tour of the multiverse and are reminded that not everything is what it seems. Thanks to Storyseeker for his help in reviewing this. As usual, if you have any comments or preferences, please don’t be shy. RandR.DISCLAIMER: I do not own the characters used in this story and no profit is earned.
It was nice to actually be fighting normal, run of the mill demons again, Xander reflected as he ducked under the lizard-thing’s clawed hand and stabbed it.
They didn’t know the breed, it was true, but these creatures had a cage full of innocent and very scared people, whether as slaves or snacks, Xander didn’t want to know. He just moved on to the next opponent before his first one had hit the ground.
A kick to the head and another stab sent the second demon to the floor. He glanced at Faith and discovered she was on her fourth. No surprise, he reflected as he got back to business.
They were just finishing up, and Xander was working on the lock when two men burst into the warehouse and aimed strange weapons at them with orders to freeze. Both demon hunters stopped and stared.
“Err, Xan? Is that Tommy Lee Jones and Will Smith?”
Noting the businesslike way they held their weapons and the way they moved to keep the two hunters covered without ever blocking each other’s field of fire, Xander sighed. “I don’t think so.”
“They’re WHAT?!” The chief was in rare form, the vein on the side of his head pulsing as his blood pressure rose.
“Demon hunters,” the senior agent repeated. “They say they attacked the smugglers-”
“The smugglers we spent MONTHS tracking!” the old man shouted in frustration.
“-because they believed the Momolacha were demons gathering slaves or sacrifices or some such.” His younger partner, he noted, was wisely keeping silent. He didn’t want the chief’s attention at the moment.
Sighing heavily, the old man nodded. “Ok. Not the first time something like this has happened. What group they work for? The Council? The Sanctuary? Find out and make contact, and we’ll see if we can straighten this out.”
“This place is weird,” Faith sighed as they were led to a cell. “How were we supposed to know? We just got shoved out of that damn portal into the middle of that mess.”
“Does it really matter what they are, given what they were doing?” Xander griped. “If it walks like a demon and quacks like a demon…”
“”Keep quiet,” the agent leading the way snapped as he escorted them down a hall where humans walked side-by-side with the strangest assortment of creatures either hunter had ever seen.
A distraction appeared in the form of several voices screaming in panic. The sound of something metallic hitting the ground preceded a flood of what Xander realized were coffee beans spilling out of a room that proved to be a kitchenette, and across the floor of the corridor. The agent leading the way slipped and landed on flat on his face.
He didn’t have time to get up before four bizarre looking creatures rushed out of the room, running right over him and scaling the other two agents walking behind Xander and Faith. The small yellow creatures with the big black eyes and antennae were babbling about a bright light and a hole in the air.
Faith glanced at Xander who nodded. As one, they turned and delivered spinning sidekicks to the two agents, sending to the ground along with the terrified creatures clinging to them. They then rushed into the kitchen and through the waiting portal.