Love Them or Hate Them?
I don’t own anything you recognise, I probably do own everything you don’t recognise and I’m not making any money from writing this story.
‘Buffy: the Vampire Slayer’ is owned by Twentieth Century Fox and others while ‘Supernatural’ is owned by the CW and others. ‘Harry Potter’ is owned J.K. Rowling and others.
And those others that I’m talking about? I’m not them either.Crossover:
It’s a multiple crossover between B:tVs, SPN and HP.Pairing:
I’m going to have to keep you guessing this time, because if I told you already, it will spoil the surprise.Rating:
FR15, because I get a bit more explicit.Spoilers:
For everything. There will be spoilers for SPN, B:tVS and HP; so, keep that in mind when you start reading.Summary:
It’s a blind date show for all fandom characters. Yes, you have read it correctly: a blind date show. Slash. Threesome. Crack!fic.Challenge:
This is for challenge 264: Winner takes it all. This challenge was made by Jinni.
“talking”emphasistime and/or placeStory: Crossing Your PathChapter Four: Love Them or Hate Them?Harvelle’s Roadhouse, Five Weeks Later
“Welcome back, ladies and gentlemen, for another episode of Crossing Your Path, the blind date show for all fandom characters. Today we welcome back Rupert Giles, Ethan Rayne, Remus Lupin and Severus Snape. Give them a warm round of applause, everyone!” Jo announced, looking in the direction of camera two.
Together with the audience she turned to watch the four men come through the door and walk on stage.
After having been greeted by all four Jo settled back into her seat and asked, “I could be wrong here, but going by the happy looks on your face and the fact that obviously no one has been killed in these last five weeks, I’m assuming that things have been going well between the four of you?”
“Things have been going very well indeed,” Giles answered. “In fact, things have been going better than ever.”
“And by things
he means sex,” Ethan smoothly interrupted, giving Jo a wicked grin.
The audience ooh-ed and aah-ed when they heard that while their fellow Council members groaned, blushed or leered.
“Yes, well, thank you for talking about our sex life in front of millions of people, Ethan,” Giles said, glaring.
“You’re welcome, dear,” was the cheeky response.
Remus and Severus looked at each other in silent commiseration. If only they had known what kind of men exactly they had promised to let themselves in with when asked several weeks earlier, they might have given another answer.
They turned to look at the whispered bickering that had started between Giles and Ethan and reconsidered. Who were they kidding? Even if they had known exactly what to expect, they still would have said yes to spending the rest of their lives with the two others.
Giles’s bookish ways, Ethan’s penchant for distributing chaos at the most inopportune moments, Giles’s inclination towards doling out sexual forms of punishments, if Ethan—well, mostly Ethan—had done something he didn’t agree with, Ethan’s extreme reaction to a bit of growling, . . .
They had to admit it to themselves, if not to outsiders: they had fallen head over heels for the two crazy men they had chosen weeks earlier. Remus and Severus looked at each other and silently admitted that they had also fallen for each other after finally spending time together without the threat of Voldemort hanging over their heads.
After giving a small smile they turned back to listen to Giles and Ethan’s continued squabbling before deciding they had had enough and putting themselves between the two men.
Jo happily noticed that it wasn’t really the fact that Severus and Remus sat themselves down between Giles and Ethan that had them stop arguing. No, it only took a hand placed on their arm to put an end to it.
“So,” Jo said, “about the making up part after a fight . . . Has that been going better now that there are four of you instead of two?”
“Yeah,” Faith answered in Giles and Ethan’s stead.
At the glare she received from both men, she gave an unapologetic smile back.
“It has been louder too,” Dawn said, gleefully adding to Giles’s misery.
“Not to mention dirtier,” Xander added.
“I honestly don’t think that the pile of dirty sheets coming from Giles’s room has ever been bigger,” Faith said, looking thoughtfully up at the ceiling as she pretended to think about it.
“Giles’s room?” Jo asked curiously.
“Yeah, that’s where they have all been staying these last few weeks. He has the biggest bed,” Dawn answered.
Xander grinned. “Not to mention the sturdiest.”
A slow smirk formed on Faith’s face. “And Xander should know. He had to make the bed to their specific requirements after all.”
“You made them a bed?” Jo asked him, for the moment ignoring her four guests in favour of the much juicier details she was getting from their children.
“Yeah, I did. I had to, because a) none of them wanted someone who was not part from the Council to hear about their living arrangements and b) I simply make the best furniture in a fifty-mile radius.”
X and Dom nodded in agreement.
“He’s not kidding. He made us a bed too,” Dom said, “and it really has the sturdiest frame I have ever seen.”
“And going by the howls and growls that occasionally made it through the silencing wards, they desperately needed the sturdiest bed they could find,” X added.
Faith nodded. “Yeah, the amount of beds those four went through before finally getting up the courage to ask Xander to make one for them . . .” She shook her head in mock-exasperation.
“I will have you know that not everyone is comfortable talking about sex with their children,” Giles pointed out to her.
“Oh, come off your high horse, Giles,” Dawn said. “You are the one who has been living in sin with not one, not two, but three
other men. So don’t go acting like a prude, because I want to bet that there isn’t a lot, if anything, that you haven’t done yet.”
Listening with a half-ear to audience going wild with speculation on what the four may or may not have done, Xander leaned in and whispered, “Are you serious about that bet, Dawn? Because if you are, I want in.”
“Same here,” Faith said, turning to look at her two friends.
Looking around furtively, Dawn nodded. “Okay, a new bet it is then. Fifty says that there’s nothing that those four haven’t done yet.”
“Fifty says that there is and I know exactly what,” Xander replied.
“I am going with Xander on this one,” Faith said, smirking at him.
She felt secure in the knowledge that Xander had the same idea as her. Because the others may not have noticed, but Xander never lost a bet that involved sex of some kind.
‘Their loss, my gain,’ she thought gleefully.
“And I say there’s nothing,” Cordelia replied. At the shocked looks being thrown her way, she glared. “What?! I need new boots, so when I win that money, it will definitely be well spend.”
The others rolled their eyes. They should have figured that shopping had something to do with Cordelia being willing to bet.
Dawn looked at Buffy and Willow. “Are you two in?”
Buffy shuddered. “I don’t think so. It’s bad enough knowing that your parental figures are having sex at all. I don’t want nor need to know the specifics.”
“Same here,” Willow said with a grimace.
Faith leered at the four men sitting with Jo. “Suit yourself. I happen to think that some hot guy-on-guy action gets the engine really revving.”
Dom and X leered at her while Xander looked as if he had sucked on a lemon.
‘Please don’t let her think about us, please don’t let her think about us, please don’t let her think about us, please don’t let her think about us,’ he thought. Seeing the look in her eyes, he shuddered and huddled closer to his boyfriends. ‘Oh, god, she thinks about us, she thinks about us, she thinks about us, she thinks about us.’
“Say, Xander,” Dom whispered, “wouldn’t you be interested in—”
Xander glared. “If that sentence happens to involve the words Faith and/or threesome, you are not getting any
X glared too. “Yeah, shut up, Dom. If you’re not getting any, I’m not getting any.” Seeing the look Xander had on his face, he said, “What?! You were the one who told me to start telling the truth more often.”
“Not if it hurts your chances of getting some,” Dom said, now glaring at X too.
Oblivious to the fact that they were being bet on by their children, Giles, Ethan, Severus and Remus went on with the interview with Jo.
“So we’ve heard about your sexcapades these last few weeks and the fact that you needed a bigger and better bed for reasons that involved sex too, but do you have anything else to add that doesn’t have anything to do with sex?” Jo asked them.
“You mean romance
?” Severus said, practically spitting out the last word and sneering at the ridiculous thought of him, Severus Snape, being romantic.
“Well, if that’s what you want to talk about,” Jo said easily, refusing to be intimidated by the sneering man on her couch.
“Actually,” Ethan said thoughtfully, “sex pretty much cover the entire few weeks we’ve been together.
Remus and Giles groaned in perfect unison at the absolutely lack of discretion Ethan showed—even in front of millions of viewers. Severus only raised an eyebrow.
Liking the thought of hearing more details about their lives, Jo leaned towards Severus and Ethan.
Remus and Giles looked at each other first, then at Ethan and then at one another again.
“We need to do something about this,” Remus said.
“Definitely,” Giles said, narrowing his eyes at Ethan.
“I’m pretty sure that we’ll be able to convince Severus to help us with a potion or two that could help us with Ethan’s punishment,” Remus pointed out. “It’s his sex life that Ethan has been talking about too after all.”
---Council’s Headquarters, That Evening
During the rest of the interview with Jo Ethan remained happily oblivious to what his lovers where planning for him behind his back. Until they got home. Then it quickly became clear to him that telling all and sundry about their sex life hadn’t been his best plan.
Oh, who was he kidding? He loved the punishment that Remus, Giles and Severus had decided on doling out to him in the privacy of their own bedroom. Consequently, he decided that he definitely needed to tell more people about his sex life. Preferably in such a way that word would get back to his lovers.
And about that bet. Turned out that Xander and Faith were right by assuming that there was something that Giles, Remus, Severus and Ethan hadn’t done yet. You can imagine that Cordelia and Dawn were not happy campers. Especially not Cordelia as she not only lost money, but also didn’t get her new boots.End Crossing Your Path: Episode Two.A/N:
Finally, the last chapter of this episode of Crossing Your Path has been posted. I hope you’ve enjoyed it.
I don't mind getting reviews with pairing requests for this story. I can't promise to write everything, because I do have to get inspiration for an episode. If you want to request an episode make sure that you leave me the people you want to be in one episode with
the fandoms those characters are from, because chances are that I might not know from which show the characters are.
Reviews are very much welcome. Flames are still not wanted nor needed. If someone does decide to leave me one . . . Well, I think you know what will happen, but I’ll say it again: flames will be seriously mocked by me and probably my friends as well. You have been warned.