“I’m pretty sure that I want this new eye, ‘cause being stuffed into a jail cell for looking weird in certain parts of Africa is not of the good. Don’t let me even get started about airport security in this country. May I just ask why they have such big hands? How long will it take me to recover from this? How real will this glass eye look? Am I going to have that really creepy lazy eye thing going on?” Xander looked expectantly at Dr. Yang.
She simply sighed and continued doing her doctorly activities.
“Um, Dr. Yang? Dr. Sloan said you’d be happy to answer my questions?”
“Look, your surgery is lame. I could be scrubbing in on a valve replacement but instead I’m doing your prosthesis. You think a prosthetic could look any stupider than that eye patch? Seriously?” Xander was impressed, he hadn’t ever been put down so harshly in such a bored and disinterested tone of voice (Cordelia has always had a lot of fire and bite to her insults). He immediately relaxed. His super awesome and competent doctor thought the surgery was boring. Nothing to worry about, then.
“Thanks, Dr. Yang! I feel so much better now. I’m sorry you have to do my boring surgery but I’m really, really happy that you’ll be there. You are, like, the most awesome doctor I’ve ever met,” Xander beamed widely.
Christina was taken aback. First, she thought that (what was his name again?) was being sarcastic. But looking into his earnest eye, she realized he was completely serious. A niggling feeling of horror began to form.
“Do not, now or after the surgery, attempt to hug me. I won’t be responsible for my actions if you do,” and Xander was treated to her first expression, a fairly deadly glare.
He only smiled wider and gave her a thumbs up. She sighed and stomped out of the room.
AN: I had meant to get all of this story out yesterday, as a sort of bday present for everyone, but I was unable to do so. It should all be up by the end of the day.