I am almost one full foot in the door of full-time employment. It's still up in the air what my immediate future may hold, as such I have very little time to work on any of my stories. Plus I only have weekends off and there's so much to do it doesn't give me near as much time as I hoped to focus on multiple tasks at a time.
That being said, I still managed to pen something new for your personal enjoyment - as I am currently in a Friendship is Magic frame of mind - since I am also working on a non-crossover story posted under my pen name at Fanfiction.net, I felt this was the perfect type of story to put up this weekend. (A two parter rather than a one-shot seeing as how I want to share what I've got so far to get some opinions and then perhaps tomorrow evening I'll have finished it off.)
This was meant to be an April Fool's type story, but I was too tired after work to get the whole thing done, and I was still going for one-shot story.
Anyway, enjoy people. This is why they shouldn't have left Andrew to protect Anya - though you may wonder why Andrew isn't the target of her revenge, well... Just wait until the end of the story and you'll see that perhaps 'revenge' isn't all it's meant to be about. ;)Disclaimer: The author makes no claims of ownership to any of the characters appearing in this story. The characters from Buffy the Vampire Slayer - no matter how peripheral they appear to be - are in fact the property of Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy Productions. The characters of Ponyville belong exclusively to Hasbro, the Hub and to a lesser extent, though by no means less important, Lauren Faust. This is a work of fan fiction meant to entertain and garner no financial renumeration or recognition or reimbursements of any kind. Enjoy.
Anya Jenkins was in Valhalla – her spirit had arrived there after being murdered by a Bringer – but she wasn’t singing songs of her glorious deeds or binge drinking on mead. Instead she was laughing – and her laughter was something that made every other spirit in Valhalla shy away from her for fear her deranged appearance turn into violent assault on their person.
Anya had decided she was going to curse the three most responsible for her death to a fate worse than same – and so this was the reason why she was laughing – because her vengeance upon Buffy Summers, Willow Rosenberg and Xander ‘How Dare He Stand Me Up at the Altar’ Harris was definitely amusing and well worth it.
What happened to them? Well in order to answer that we’ll have to leave this universe behind and go to another one – perhaps even the one without shrimp – it’s possible.
“This is all their fault! I can’t believe I died, Xander is so going to pay for this, and his little friends too. I wasn’t a vengeance demon for nothing, lousy Scoobies!
” Anya’s words carried down from Valhalla and struck the three Scoobies as they recuperated from the big battle against the First.
Whether or not they dreamt what happened to them after that is entirely up to the whims of fate – however since I am a betting man – well I’m going to say this took place and is probably still taking place.
Slowly opening her eyes Dusk Thorn turned over slightly to find herself laying out in the open air under a clear bright and sunny day – confused the young pony slowly got to her hooves glancing around mystified. The last thing she remembered she and her two traveling companions had decided to come to Ponyville, but then if that were the case why were they asleep on the outskirts of the small town?
Glancing down she suddenly realized that this wasn’t right – she wasn’t a horse – or even a pony – she was supposed to be a human by the name of Willow Rosenberg. And she’d never even heard of a place called Ponyville before.
“This can’t be good,” a male voice stated.
Dusk Thorn turned to find the familiar shape of her male traveling companion – the Pegasus stallion Shining Night – he was a black Pegasus pony with a startlingly white colored mane and chocolate brown eyes – plural.
“Willow? Why are we ponies?” Shining Night asked flapping his wings nervously. “And since when can I fly?” he added as he turned his head to stare at the pair of wings on his back.
“Xander,” Dusk Thorn said. “I don’t think we’re on Earth anymore,” she finished lamely.
“What did you do? Was it the booze you and Kennedy shared?” Bitter Angst’s familiar voice demanded. Bitter Angst was a soft blue Earth pony with genuine blonde mane and a combination of purple and green eyes. On her flank was a stake and cross Cutie Mark indicating who was actually the soul in control of the pony.
“Uh, Buffy, I didn’t do this, this power is way beyond me,” Dusk Thorn explained idly curious as to what she looked like as a pony.
“Why do I have two names?” Shining Night wondered. “And two different sets of memories, in fact… Guys I’m scared, I’m starting to forget being Xander.”
“Me too,” Dusk Thorn agreed with a shake of her head which caused her mane to fall down partially into her vision – from what she could tell at least she was still a red head – albeit a rather brighter tone red head.
“I’m going to kill whoever came up with my other name,” Bitter Angst stated.
“Can you still kill?” Dusk Thorn wondered idly. “I mean, do you still have all that strength that you did as the Slayer?” she elaborated with a frown.
Bitter Angst shook her head. “Feels like it… I mean… Here let’s try with that rock over there,” she suggested trotting over to a large rock and studying it carefully. With one well placed hoof she managed to shove the thing clear of its mossy resting place and send it tumbling clear across the little field they’d fallen asleep in. “Yep, still got it,” she bragged prancing back over to her friends.
“Is anypony else wierded out by the fact that you are actually prancing?” Shining Night questioned.
“Actually I kind of like it,” Dusk Thorn said moving over to the path leading towards Ponyville. “Come on, Shining Night, Bitter Angst, let’s get to this Ponyville place we were headed. Maybe somepony there can actually help us get back to our original universe.” And with that she started off down the path.
“Somepony,” Shining Night repeated with raised brow.
“Just go with it, Shining,” Bitter Angst said rolling her eyes and heading off after Dusk.
“What’s on my flank?” Shining whispered carefully aside to his friend.
Shining Night frowned. “A telescope? Then that means whoever did this knows about what Caleb called me,” he said nervously.
“Oh drat,” Bitter complained. “That’s just what we need.”
It was early in the morning when the three misplaced pony Scoobies arrived at Ponyville – a friendly and enchanted looking town filled with magical talking ponies going about their daily lives – several special mailponies were fluttering about delivering letters and packages. A pair of ponies were hard at work putting out the daily sweets at the Sugarcube Corner shop.
There was a mixture of different types, Pegasus ponies, Earth ponies and Unicorns all intermingling – Dusk Thorn was amazed at the multitude of colors she was seeing – while passing a shop window she froze as she caught her reflection. Her eyes were still green, but brighter than usual and her coat was a dark orange color. She made it work, but it did seem like a strange combination to have an orange coat and red mane.
Her flank bore a strange looking Cutie Mark – at first Dusk couldn’t figure it out until she realized that it was sage, rosemary and wolfsbane arranged in a circular pattern. She also found out that she was a unicorn.
Bitter Angst was feeling much lighter than normal – she didn’t have this overwhelming urge to go out hunting and she felt – for the first time since being ripped out of heaven – at peace. “This place isn’t dark,” she whispered. “Maybe being stuck as a pony won’t be so bad?” she said.
“Ok, I get that I appear to be the only black pony around, but does anybody else get the distinct impression that we’re being… stared at?” Shining asked nervously eyeing numerous fillies as they started turning their attention to him.
“Hmm?” Dusk said. “I hadn’t really noticed,” she admitted her gaze wandering as a herd of mares trotted past and Dusk found herself staring at their shapely looking ‘curves’. “Surprisingly enough the more Willow’s memories fade the less I worry about Kennedy, hmmm. I wonder if she’s into mares instead of stallions?” she said watching a particularly fancy looking purple Earth pony.
“Hi!” a voice suddenly shouted in Shining’s ear causing the winged stallion to jerk into the sky suddenly.
“Gah!” he shouted.
“Oh sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you, you’re new here aren’t you. I mean of course you’re new, I know everypony in Ponyville and you aren’t one of them… OHHHH! I should throw you a welcome to Ponyville party, we’ll need streamers and punch and cake and muffins and cupcakes, gotta have those, by the way my name’s Pinkie Pie, what’s yours?” the pink Earth pony with lighter pink mane and three balloons on her flank asked her light blue eyes shining brightly and cheerily as she stood uncomfortably close to Shining Night.
“Hello, Pinkie Pie, I’m Dusk Thorn and that’s my friend Shining Night, we weren’t really interested in a party just this minute we’re trying to find somepony who might be able to help us, you see…” Dusk started to say.
“Oh! I know, Twilight, she knows practically everything and if she doesn’t know it then it’ll be in her library house where she moved in recently… like last summer? Or was it early autumn? Oh well, that’s ok, I betcha anything she can help you figure out what you’re doing here like that,” Pinkie stated. “Nice Cutie Marks by the way, you must have some really special talents, mine’s throwing parties in case you couldn’t tell.”
“Dusk,” Bitter said softly. “There’s somepony who can out-babble you under the table,” she whispered in Dusk’s ear.
“I know, I didn’t even finish explaining to her what kind of help we needed, Bitter, she scares me,” Dusk admitted taking a step back from Pinkie.
“Why are you so close?” Shining finally demanded annoyed at how close Pinkie was.
“Oh, well that’s because you’re just so rare. It’s not everyday we see a black pony in Equestria, we’ve got orange ponies and purple ponies and green ponies and grey ponies and aquamarine, Tangerine Twist is actually an off blue color for some reason and then of course there’s pink ponies like me, but black ponies are super rare… Are you attached to any mare?” Pinkie asked with suddenly suspicious eyes.
“If I say yes will you back off?” Shining pleaded.
“You lied,” Pinkie said with a cheerful smile. “But that’s ok, I’m not looking for a coltfriend right now,” she added. “Uh-oh,” her gaze traveled past the three newcomers.
Shining didn’t want to turn around, but some compulsion made him, what he saw didn’t bode well. “What should I do?” he whispered to Pinkie – since she was a native to this dimension it made sense to ask her.
“Well you probably want to be flying off right about now,” Pinkie said still smiling cheerfully as she turned and started trotting towards the center of town. “Meet us at the big tall tree with the picture of a book on it. That’s the library where Twilight Sparkle lives and she can help you, I hope, but you’d better be fast because those Pegasus ponies can catch up to you pretty fast,” she added.
Shining nodded and – not bothering to question how he even knew how to fly – much less where he was going to hide – he took off as fast as his wings could take him.
Every filly in town that had suddenly developed a dark gleam of interest in their eyes upon noticing the black Pegasus pony started off after him.
Bitter Angst frowned slightly. “Why is everypony chasing Shining?” she asked.
Pinkie laughed. “Because they want him for their coltfriend silly, mating with a black pony is said to bring lots of luck.” Pinkie giggled and trotted off with the two confused ponies following after her.
“Even in this world his luck with women is terrible,” Dusk muttered.
“Why do I get the feeling that before today is over he’s going to be begging one of us to pretend to be his coltfriend?” Bitter asked.
“This is Xander we’re talking about,” Dusk reminded. “And that’s marefriend, Bitter.”
“Point taken.” Bitter followed Dusk and Pinkie towards the library wondering if Shining would be able to make it there in one piece.
Shining Night was flapping his wings as hard as he could and going as fast as he could in any general direction that got him away from the hoard of ponies that wanted him – and not in the just be friends kind of way – he never knew ponies could look so alluring and yet so frightening as when they wanted to jump his bones.
It gave new meaning to the term interspecies relationship. Not bothering to watch where he was going Shining soon found himself ramming into somepony hard – and very painfully – with a loud cry of surprise and a grunt of pain the pair of them tumbled to the ground.
Fortunately they didn’t land on the ground – instead they collided onto a low hanging cloud and there they stopped.
“I can walk on clouds,” was the first thing out of his mouth.
“Well d’uh,” the pony he’d hit said rolling her eyes. She had an ordinary blue coat with rainbow colored mane and vibrant purple eyes. “Where’d you go to school if you don’t know the first thing about weather ponies and their skills?” she asked still rubbing her head. “And who taught you how to fly, you’re supposed to look where you’re going or else you’ll wind up like D…” she trailed off in utter astonishment as she finally caught sight of the young stud that’d inadvertently collided with her. Her lips spread up in a very happy smile.
“Oh no, not you too,” Shining moaned.
“What about me too?” the pony demanded in a huff.
“I’m sorry, but you see, I’ve suddenly had a lot of interest developed in me by a rather large herd of ponies and I’d really rather not break anyponies hearts, if you know what I mean,” Shining explained as delicately as possible.
The mare in front of him laughed a tiny laugh – it came out like a snort of disbelief. “Well all those other ponies are just going to have to be disappointed,” she stated. “Rainbow Dash, and you are?”
“Shining Night, and if you’ll excuse me, Rainbow, I think I’d better be going now,” Shining informed as politely as possible before he took off at blinding speeds – he wasn’t ordinarily this fast – the instinct of self-preservation was driving him onwards.
Rainbow smiled dreamily and flopped back down onto the cloud. “He is so going to be mine, the Wonderbolts can wait,” she said – for anypony that knew Rainbow Dash that would have shocked them – but nopony who knew her happened to be around.
Now that Shining knew he could walk on clouds he had taken off much higher this time and was currently moving from cloud to cloud stealthily – his intention was to avoid being spotted as best as he could – and he aimed to ensure that he made it to this library place of Twilight Sparkle’s in one piece.
So intent was he on evading detection from below he failed to consider the possibility of somepony being above him. Naturally once you could fly the entire world became three dimensional and one needed to be aware of their surroundings – Shining Night wasn’t there yet.
One eye lazily following him the light grey blonde pony continued to stalk her prey – in-between delivering her letters – the pony’s name wasn’t spoken much, but she did have a nickname. A cruel one that had hurt her at first, but eventually she came to realize that nopony meant to hurt her by using it, they just didn’t realize that she had a certain condition, she wasn’t stupid. On the contrary – the mailpony was quite intelligent – she was the only one smart enough to follow after the black Pegasus stallion from this height after all undetected and still manage her rounds.
So Derpy Hooves continued to deliver letters and stalk Shining Night undetected – and of course Shining Night was unaware of the potential danger he was in. For once Derpy set her sights on something she always saw it through – it’s what made her the best mailpony in all of Ponyville – some theorized all of Equestria.
Dusk Thorn and Bitter Angst meanwhile had arrived at their destination – a large tree in the center of town that had been turned into a library slash home for a special pony who had arrived recently from Canterlot – according to Pinkie- one of her bestest best friends.
“Twilight Sparkle!” Pinkie shouted as she barged right in without knocking. “New ponies came to Ponyville, but they said they don’t want a party right now, so I offered them some help… They don’t know how they got here,” she explained.
“How did she know that?” Bitter whispered aside to Dusk.
“Oh that’s easy, silly,” Pinkie said popping up so suddenly she nearly gave Bitter a heart attack. “I know a lot, thanks to my unique gift.”
“Throwing parties helps you to read otherponies minds?” Bitter said disbelievingly.
“Of course not!” Pinkie denied. “My tail was twitching this morning and I said to myself, Pinkie, something’s going to drop in any minute… Then you arrived in that field and Applejack might have mentioned something about this weird portal in the sky, see I met her earlier while she was bringing apples in to Sugarcube Corner,” she explained.
“Wait, a portal?” Dusk repeated anxiously. “Did she see where it led?”
Pinkie shook her head. “Nope.” She skipped off looking for Twilight who still hadn’t come down. “Twilight, where are you?” she called out.
“Pinkie Pie!” Twilight Sparkle’s voice came from a doorway leading downstairs. “You ruined my experiments, why are you barging in here so early in the morning and did you break my door again and… Who’s this?” Twilight Sparkle froze as she arrived in the main room of the library her eyes tracked the two newcomers and lingered briefly in sudden interest on Dusk.
“Dusk Thorn and Bitter Angst, but I think she’d prefer if you called her Buffy,” Pinkie stated with a wide smile.
Bitter’s mouth hung open agape at the use of her other identity.
Dusk however was still too busy starting at the newcomer to pay much attention to it. She was a light purple unicorn with a mostly purple mane and a pink streak running through it. Her flank had stars shining on it and Dusk couldn’t help herself – she wanted to really get to know this pony.
“Hi, I don’t remember seeing you before,” Twilight said her cheeks suddenly darkening embarrassed. “I mean… We’ve never met before, Twilight Sparkle.” Twilight presented a hoof.
“Dusk Thorn,” Dusk said shaking hooves with the other pony and secretly committing her scent to memory.
Twilight’s cheeks flushed darker and she turned to Pinkie. “Did you say something about a portal?” she asked doing her best to ignore Dusk’s effect on her.
Bitter rolled her eyes. “What is it with you and bookish types?” she whispered.
“What do you mean bookish types?” Dusk demanded shooting her friend a glare.
“Come on, out of the three steady ‘partners’ you’ve had in your life Kennedy is the most outgoing and definitely stands out compared to shy and timid Tara and quiet stoic Oz,” Bitter stated matter of factly.
“Oh shut up, Buffy,” Dusk complained turning her flank to her best friend and flicking her tail in annoyance.
Once again back with Shining – who had unfortunately gotten lost while trying to be stealthy – sticking his head out through a cloud Shining found that somehow he’d passed Ponyville entirely and was currently above a small tree house off the normal path leading into town.
He could see a yellow Pegasus pony with pink mane standing in a garden pulling carrots – next to her was a little white rabbit doing most of the eating of same – knowing he needed directions, but afraid of what might happen – Shining nevertheless dared to venture back to the ground.
“Angel, if you don’t stop eating all the carrots your little baby cousins won’t have anything for dinner,” the pony scolded the rabbit.
The rabbit continued nibbling ignoring her.
“Excuse me,” Shining said.
“Eep!” the pony let out a terrified sound and promptly disappeared under her wheelbarrow.
Shining stuck his head down so he could see her shaking like a leaf – her two front hooves covering her eyes. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to frighten you,” he told the terrified mare.
Slowly opening one eye a crack the pony stopped shaking and seemed quite surprised to find him talking to her. Very deliberately she started to climb out from under her wheelbarrow.
Shining wondered if he should be worried – unlike most of the other ponies he didn’t notice any strong urges of desire in her eyes – just awe and a little confusion.
“W-w-were you talking to me?” the pony asked in a very soft voice.
Fond memories of Tara suddenly threatening to overwhelm him Shining simply nodded as he resisted the urge to start crying.
“Oh, no stallion ever talks to m-m-me,” the yellow pony said shooting Shining a nervous smile. “I’m… I’m Fluttershy.”
“Shining Night,” Shining said subconsciously adopting a heroic stance – he couldn’t help it he just felt it was something he had to do at this particular moment.
Fluttershy smiled timidly up at him – her head and neck having dipped down to hide the flushing of her cheeks. “D-Did you want something?” she asked.
“Directions, I was trying to avoid all the other ponies in town because… Well I’m a black stallion and apparently now I’ve got like fifty dozen fillies and foals after me to mate with because apparently that’s lucky.” Shining paused briefly and shook his head. “Anyway, me and my friends were going to Twilight’s house with Pinkie because she thought she might be able to help us and while trying to avoid the other ponies I… got lost,” he finished lamely his cheeks flushing slightly.
“O-Oh, I understand completely, Shining,” Fluttershy said moving into his personal space rather slowly. “I can take you to Twilight’s house, b-b-but we’ll have to get something out of my house first,” she said nervously eyeing the stallion.
Shining didn’t know if he should trust this timid and shy pony, but he didn’t have too many options – also he was kind of used to this personality type – Willow and Tara both shared it to some extent until their friendships made them climb out of their shells. Shrugging his haunches Shining indicated that Fluttershy should lead the way.
Angel the rabbit glared at the black stallion – he was highly protective of his pony friend and didn’t want to see her hurt – most stallions avoided her because of her shy quiet nature and love of all things furry – Angel knew someday she’d meet the right stallion though, but he just knew that this particular stallion couldn’t possibly be the right one.
Fluttershy led Shining into her house very nervously – she’d never had a stallion visit her before – ordinarily she would have shut up completely and rushed to hide somewhere, but this particular stallion seemed to be completely oblivious to the fact that he was exhibiting some sort of powerful and harmonious aura.
Fluttershy hadn’t brought this up before, but ever since receiving the Element of Harmony for Kindness she’d been able to discern auras – she could tell who was kinder than most and this stallion looked to be almost as kind as her. She wouldn’t pretend that she could ever make him her coltfriend, but she wouldn’t mind having him as a friend, friend, and part of her more secretive thoughts felt that perhaps a friend with benefits friend could work out too. She could see herself easily trusting someone like Shining Night.
But now wasn’t the time to be thinking like that – he had to get to Twilight’s before anypony else showed up looking for him – because that would just put him in an awkward position. Smiling to herself Fluttershy reached into her closet and pulled out her special notice-me-not cloak. It wasn’t enchanted or anything, but Fluttershy always wore it in large crowds because it gave her a feeling of security.
Turning to Shining Night she presented him with the cloak. “T-T-This should help,” she offered timidly. Averting her eyes she waited for him to reject it because nopony in their right minds would ever wear such a tasteless thing.
Shining Night however let out a huge sigh of relief and quickly put the cloak on. Glancing at himself in the closest mirrored surface he frowned slightly. “Well, it covers me up almost, but my hooves are sticking out so everypony can tell I’m still me,” he said.
Fluttershy smiled. “That’s why we put these on,” she said tugging out a pair of galoshes. “I w-w-wear these sometimes when I have to go to Froggy-Bottom Bog,” she explained.
“Will they fit?” Shining asked dubiously. “I mean they are mare sized not colt sized.” He indicated the larger size of his hooves by holding one close to hers, but not touching hers.
Fluttershy’s heart skipped several beats. She knew that couldn’t be good. “I-I-It might be a tight fit. But it will hide your coat coloring.”
Shining grinned and squeezed into the rubber boots without another word – although he did grimace slightly and grunt with the effort as his hooves were pinched slightly in the too small boots.
Fluttershy gripped the hood of the cloak in her teeth and pulled it over him – delighting herself with the nearness of the stallion – shaking her head briefly to clear it of the dangerous thoughts she quickly checked outside to see if anypony was around. “It’s clear,” she whispered afraid her voice might crack or otherwise show her true feelings towards this stallion.
Shining indicated that she should lead the way. “You know where Twilight lives more than me,” he reminded.
Blushing embarrassingly at having forgotten Fluttershy headed out of the house. “Angel, don’t eat all those carrots while I’m gone, the other bunnies need some too,” she scolded her friend.
Angel glared at Shining as he snickered at the name. And then he got a deliciously wicked idea – the little rabbit snuck up to the cloak and used his front paws to unravel a tiny piece of cloth. He knew he really shouldn’t – because it was Fluttershy’s favorite cloak, but he could make it up to her by picking all the rest of the carrots and not eating a single one. Mock his name will he, the stallion was in for a rude awakening as soon as someone noticed that threadbare appearance and tried to fix it.
Up above Derpy watched her target with one lazy eye while the other kept tight focus on her next call of duty – to deliver a letter to Sweet Apple Acres – specifically Big Macintosh. She knew where he was now, she could leave him with Fluttershy – the timid animal lover was no threat to her plans – and she was slightly behind on her rounds. She had to get back on track otherwise she’d lose her prestigious position among the mailpony elite.
And she was fiercely proud of her one great talent – accidents aside such as the incident where she’d miscalculated the weight of a particularly heavy crate during her one day working alongside other parcel deliveryponies – but that hadn’t been entirely her fault. She was much better working alone – being part of a team of deliveryponies just wasn’t in her, she got nervous and unsettled as it was against her normal routine and she was a stickler for that routine – she’d been upset when she dropped all of those things on Twilight’s head.
Hopefully the unicorn would forgive her someday. Derpy shook herself from these musings and quickly got back on task – first she’d deliver the rest of her mail in record time – then she’d convince that black stallion that he was meant only for her. Or at least almost exclusively for her – Derpy understood that with such a rare stallion around in Ponyville she might have to share – so long as she could be compensated for allowing him to stud she wouldn’t mind it – just so long as he never forgot that he was her property from the moment he set foot in Ponyville.To Be Concluded…