Summery: Dean has a lot of impressions about Dawn Summers. Too bad they are all false
Disclaimer: Characters belong to their respective owners this is merely fanfiction that is done for free
Notes: Beta reader would be awesome :)
Also I don't know when Twilight came out, I'm not a fan so that may make the time line a bit skewiff. Basically Sam left for college and it's the first few months he's away, Post season 7 BTVS and Dawn has joined Stanford.
This is an interlude in the story where Dawn and Dean contemplate their families and their siblings. Spoilers BTVS Season 6 All seasons Supernatural
This is also not necessarily part of the main story, I just wanted to highlight how Dawn and Dean felt similarily about the changes in their siblings and their place in the world.
A terrible, awful thought was beginning to creep through Dawn's mind. At first it was only at night, a passing thought that left as quickly as it appeared but lately Dawn had a harder time banishing the thought.
Maybe it would have been better if Buffy hadn't come back.
It made Dawn sick to her stomach to think of it, a feeling of betrayal so deep that she felt as if her very essence was being challenged. After everything Buffy had done for her, how could she even think it?
But she did.
And every time she watched Buffy go through the motions of living, of lying, Dawn wants to grab her and scream and scream until something, anything happens. She has the dreadful feeling that nothing would happen, that Buffy would fix that awful, serene expression on her face and tell her everything is fine.
Dawn begins stealing, first it's just for attention, but it becomes increasingly clear that the Scoobies are drowning themselves in their own problems and barely notice her. The old sure refuge of Willow and Tara isn't so sure anymore. Tara is different not, stronger and sadder since she left Willow and Dawn can feel the threads that are keeping her family together are slowly ripping and she is the only one that is trying to fix it.
That is when reality comes crashing down.
She's the only one that cares.
She stops stealing, straightens out her grades, being as good as she can be but it's like screaming into a void and in the end the only way the Scoobies wake up is when Tara dies and Dawn can't help but to laugh at the irony.
No one cared about Tara, not really, she was an outsider just like Dawn, but in that moment where a piece of metal no bigger then her finger rips into Tara suddenly everyone sees how bad Willow has gotten and how numb they have all been.
But it's too late.
Somehow, it always is.
Dawn is simply a broken key without a purpose. A human with made up memories that should have been destroyed with Glory, and sometimes she thinks it would have been better that way. Buffy would still be the hero everyone adored, she wouldn't grieve for a place she could never get back, and the Scoobies wouldn't be slowly drowning themselves.
Why is she the only one that sees?
In the small quiet moments in the dead of night Dean wonders why he bothers to try and keep his family together. It would be easier and less stressful to let Sam lead a simple college life, marry his girl and have a nice career in law, and it would certainly be alot easier to let Dad wander the back lanes of America, away from his disapproval and constant corrections. But Dean can't, he would never consider it for more then a moment, one self indulgent moment where he thinks of himself.
He sees the black holes John and Sam throw themselves into, the darkness they seem to crave, it's what killed their father and it's what's killing Sam. It's not the demon blood but Winchester blood that's infecting Sam, making him act the way he does, as if he has to take on every evil out there and kill it.
Dean has no misconceptions about his place in the universe, he is a soldier. Whatever that little four year old boy could have been died in that fire.
He doesn't understand why Sam, who is so smart, so talented decides to throw himself into the fire time after time, when he knows it's all about him. Dean doubts anyone would notice if he died in the big epic scale of things, one soldier, one tiny tally in an endless war, but Sam is a game changer and he acts as if he he isn't, or that he doesn't care.
Why is he the only one who sees it?