Disclaimer: I don’t own Buffy, Star Trek or several other things in this story.
This is a challenge response to Scorpio’s “The Quest” challenge.
Sasha smiled gleefully when she pushed the override on the airlock and sent the Ferengi spiraling out toward space. She loved her watcher, she was fairly sure that most of the other watchers would have been too stuffy to let her open the airlock and send the Ferengi into the vacuum of space. Now if he had just let her give him a facemask with a couple of minutes of air, he would have been the best watcher ever. Still he was probably right about it being bad form to let them suffer too much. She was just happy that the mind probe that Xander had picked up from one of his alien contacts had gotten what they wanted out of the creature in a most painful way. Apparently, whatever made them resistant to telepathic scans caused them a hell of a lot of pain when scanned by the alien machine. She waved at the creature as it flew away from the ship. “Bye, rot in hell.”
Xander frowned as Sasha waved at the alien as it flew away from the ship. “You know that the Ferengi are normally vacuum desiccated, and then sold… It’s possible that someone could recover the body.”
She shrugged, “Nah, I’m going to wait for his lungs to explode and all the life to drain out of him then I’m going to use the ship’s weapons to blow his body into unrecoverable fragments.”
He chuckled as he remembered a time when Faith had used a liberal amount of explosives to destroy a demon leader before mailing some of the remains to its demon clan with a warning. “Have fun, just hurry we need to get moving. I want to be at our destination sooner rather than later.”
“So where are we going anyways? You sent me out of the room before the machine got that part.”
“He was bawling every time you looked at him and screaming hysterically when you smiled. I still needed a few things out of him by that point, and the machine wasn‘t picking up anything useful while you were in the room.”
Sasha rolled her eyes, “Not my fault he’s got a serious weakness to pain and pain sticks.”
Xander shuddered as he considered some of the places his charge had put the pain stick to motivate the alien to talk. “When we get back you’re seeing the shrink about the fact that you were laughing while you tried to explode parts of the male anatomy that just… it was just evil girl.” He shook his head as he walked toward the cockpit.
“You didn’t tell me where we’re going.”
“Nasty Klingon world, you’ll like it.”
She grinned, “Sweet, now there is an alien race that can party.”
He called back over his shoulder, “You are so not drinking that shit they call alcohol.”
“What, why not?”
“Well for one, Mypsi said that you have this projectile vomit thing where that shit is concerned.” He settled into his chair and punched in the coordinates to their next destination.
She scowled, “That was one time and it wasn’t my fault. One of the girls slipped in some peach schnapps with it and ugh, so not happening this time.”
He shook his head, “You’re fifteen, drinking and alcohol so not happening on this trip.”
She scowled, “But they’re Klingons, if you don’t drink they take it as a mortal insult… oh that could be fine.”
He sighed, “Just keep talking; you’re racking up hours with the shrink.”
She grinned, “Can I at least get the hot guy shrink?”
Xander shook his head, “Depends on how well the mission goes and if you behave.”
She sighed as she walked in and plopped herself into the copilot’s chair. “So do we know where exactly we’re going?”
“Yeah, the Valcar mud wrestling pits.”
She frowned, “I didn’t know there was such a thing…”
He smirked, “Only in my head.”
She sighed, “Sometimes I don’t understand you.”
“It would be terribly boring if you did.”
“So, do we have the documents to get to the Klingon side of the border?”
Xander shrugged, “I’ll make some calls.”
She grinned as she targeted the dead and floating Ferengi and removed him from existence with a double blast of the ship’s weapons. “Sounds good, I’ve got some homework to finish if I don’t want angry school teachers when I get back.”
He chuckled, “Have fun with that, if you need any help just give me a call. You get to take the second shift on watch.”
She grinned as she left, “I’ve got a lot of homework to catch up on.”
He sighed, “Yeah, right…” He sighed as he considered what resources he could tap to get into Klingon space. He muttered, “Now if I can just keep my slayer from having too much fun in the arena, I’ll be a happy camper.” He would have preferred just going in diplomatically and acquiring the artifact but according to the Ferengi, it was in the possession of someone with too much political influence to easily strong arm. While he might have tried anyways, they had found that it wasn’t needed as the man was planning to put the artifact up as one of the prizes for winning in his gladiatorial arena. He sighed as he realized that it was going to be a long couple of days ahead.