Detour

Connor blinked one eye open slowly and focused on the argument happening above him instead of the jittering of every cell in his body. Besides knocking him out cold, being tasered fucking hurt.

“…and you can’t go around shocking anything that falls out!” One woman shouted and Connor assumed she meant the portal, which had fucked up and dropped him off in front of these two instead of Jo and Ellen.

“Jane, he had a sword!” Taser happy shouted right back.

“Point to her,” he groaned because, yeah, he hadn’t enjoyed it or anything, but they probably shouldn’t hesitate to defend themselves if people with weapons popped out of space and time at them. He sat up, hands in the air when the taser pointed at him, and said, “But I’m not here to hurt anybody. I’m, uh, not actually sure where here is, but I’m pretty sure it’s not where I’m supposed to be.”

Taser happy immediately pointed to Jane, who was looking particularly chagrined. “Her fault.”

“Darcy,” she hissed, before wringing her hands and saying, “I’m sorry. We were trying to reconnect the rainbow bridge and we must have, um, rerouted your travels. What was that thing, anyway?”

Connor blinked because, wow, that was a lot of words mushed together that didn’t make any sense. “Portal,” he said after a moment.

“Like an entrance way?” Darcy asked dubiously, pointing at the door.

“Sure,” he said, creakily climbing to his feet. Note to self: never get tasered again. “Only magical and through space and time.”

“Magic isn’t real,” Darcy and Jane said in tandem, Jane just a little less emphatically.

“Uh huh,” he said, stretching to try to get his muscles back in order. “You explain it, then. I just know what I’m told.”

Jane’s jaw bobbed for a second before it snapped shut. Her eyes sharpened, then became more hopeful. “Can you make one to anywhere?”

“I can’t make any,” he said, wincing when his back finally cracked. “But let me make a few calls.” He pulled his cell out of his pocket and looked between them. “May I have some aspirin and my sword back?”

It never hurt to ask.

They glanced at each other, then separated, Jane to her desk to grab a small bottle and Darcy to the filing cabinet to gather his belongings.

“No funny business,” she warned as she dumped his stuff in his arms.

Connor smirked. Maybe this wasn’t such a bad detour after all.